FIC: If I Fall Along the Way (JA, angst, h/c)

Title: If I Fall Along the Way
Author: Obi the Kid (hlnkid@aol.com)
Rating: PG
Summary: 5 years pre-TPM, angst, h/c, non-slash. Obi-Wan makes a mistake during a mission, and the results are deadly.
Disclaimer: George owns them, and I make no money here.
Feedback: Yes, Please!
Archive: Please ask me first.

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If I Fall Along the Way
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A young life ceased with a shrill cry that brought a Jedi Master to his knees. The mind-numbing scream penetrated his senses, and he watched as his apprentice collapsed where he stood. As Jevra Sar quickly raced to the side of his student, the Master could feel the life force fading from the 16-year-old boy. There was nothing that could be done. The last few breaths that Padawan Dylan Ness took were as he lay in the loving arms of his master.

For 6 years, Master Sar had the pleasure of training this one. Watching him grow from a boy to an honorable young man, was the greatest source of pride in the elder Jedi?s life. Now, where there was once an exuberance and spark that was unmistakable, was only a feeling of emptiness. Master Sar hugged his apprentice close to him, whispering words that he knew Dylan would never hear.

One wrong move. That?s all it took for a life to be extinguished. One mistake. The attention of one, lapsing for less than a few seconds. And Dylan Ness lay dead in the same place he stood so proudly just moments ago.

A few feet away, a young padawan, just reaching the age of 20, stood in shock. Obi-Wan Kenobi had known his mistake as soon as it happened. One fatal error in judgement. One second in time. He felt it and knew that there was nothing he could do to stop it. As the elder and more experienced apprentice, Dylan was his responsibility. But for a brief second, his attention was diverted. It was all the enemy needed to end the promising life of a 16-year-old boy.

Obi-Wan was frozen. Unable to move, his thoughts frenzied. Had he been to overconfident once again? Too cocky?

Qui-Gon Jinn knew his padawan well, and saw the images going through his students mind. As much as he needed to be at Obi-Wan?s side, his first priority was to the grieving master and the lifeless body he held in his arms. Approaching Master Sar, Qui-Gon placed a supporting hand on his shoulder. ?I am so sorry Jevra.? There was no reply, or acknowledgment. ?We must leave now, the guards will return. Can you stand??

Jevra stood carefully, clutching the limp form of his dead apprentice. With encouragement from Qui-Gon, the younger master slowly made his way up the ramp and into the ship. Almost immediately, Jinn turned to his own apprentice. ?Obi-Wan, come. We must leave.? Obi-Wan said nothing. He offered a small nod and walked the same path that Master Sar has just moments before.

The flight home was short, less than 5 standard hours. Not a word was spoken between the 3 Jedi. The complete shock of this nightmare created a feeling of unease and sadness. Everything was?too real.
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Returning home, the 3 Jedi briefed the Council on the disastrous mission. The Council members observed the tension that hung in the air. A good deal of their attention was focused on Kenobi. His eerie silence was deafening. Every so often, they would watch as Master Sar glared at Jinn?s apprentice. He mentioned the student by last name only, and the anger radiating from his being, filled the room.

Yoda directed his questioning away from the masters and directly at the young Knight. ?What have you to say apprentice??

Caught off guard, Obi-Wan took a moment to relax his breathing. Looking down, he starred relentlessly at the floor as the words filtered out. ?It was an accident Master Yoda. I do not know how this happened. I?I made a mistake?I don?t??

Master Sar, overwhelmed by his frustration and anger, turned to Kenobi. ?An accident? This is no accident apprentice. This is a complete screw up on your part. A COMPLETE SCREW UP?one that cost me the life of my pada

 

UP!

 

sniff... sniff <BLOW> , this was so sad but wonderful. I am usually REALLY LAZY at writing back but I love all your stories and I think this one may be one of the best you have written.

Kim B

 

Very sad, but very realistic and human, too, the way that they both go through a progression of different emotions until they both, finally, come to terms with what has happened.

 

you are truely terrible. I am allergic to my tears. My face swells up and stays red and splochy for an hour after i cry. A great incuragment to avoid that activity. But You and this this way to well written sad story made me cry and there is only 15 more minuets that the caffiteria will be serving dinner and know I will have to go to dinner with a red blochy face. ugh. Oh, well I think I will up this story so some more people can cry. Thanks for the story... uh, ten minute gotta go.

 

Sorry Kayalla about the crying!! forgot the hankie warning!!!

Thanks guys!! I was happy with how this one came out!! Glad you enjoyed it!

 

^_^ Very good! I liked the whole Jedi showing emotions thing... Work with it. ^_~ It's something lacking, that I think should be included. Sure, Jedi are more controlled, but Obi cried when Quggy died.. So it's official. Anyhoo, you're very talented! Keep it up! ^_^

 

Pass those tissues this way.

 

Tissues for everyone!!

 

There is truely no true words to explain how touching that story was. Excellent story!

 

Very outstanding angst, OTK! And I love the title, it works so well with the theme of the story! BRAVO!

aa

 

I really liked that! It was very sad. But, it was a little hard to understand...maybe you could have cleared it up a little more about how he died.

 

Thanks for all the comments!! GREATLY APPRECIATED!!!!

 

UP!!

 

To the Top!

 

Oh my OTK, I am sitting here with such a lump in my throat I could talk if I had to. Thankfully I only have to type now! That was one of the most heartbreaking stories I have every read!

I have been on the look out for a story of exactly this nature. I had always imagined a younger Obi being blamed (either unjustly or with reason) for the death of a fellow padawan by his or her Master, and seeing how that guilt would affect him!

 

Thanks Kelly!! This story just came to me one day, I bounced the idea off of someone and it went forward from there!

 

I went to reply to this the other day....but then my sithing computer connecion cut out.

It was absolutely great, I was sitting here with a lump in my throat willing myself not to cry.

Kithera

 

Thanks Kit....here have a hankie!!

 

Up we go!!