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Saga Sketches In The River Of Time (Obi and others, OC and canon)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Knight_Dilettante, Mar 26, 2004.

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  1. Knight_Dilettante

    Knight_Dilettante Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 24, 2002
    Sketches in the River of Time
    By Knight_Dilettante

    This is going to be more a series of vignettes slowly and irregularly posted over time* rather than a continuous story per se. In all likelihood they will not necessarily follow linear time for any character within the series either. Obi-Wan will most likely appear in nearly all the vignettes. But I suspect strongly that there will be at least one in which he will not appear.

    This prologue was written well over two years ago. But please don't let that scare you off. My thanks to two wonderful Beta readers; Mistress_Renata and Ty-Gon both were kind enough to read and comment on this (and in Ty-Gon's case especially, comma-ent for which I am extremely grateful) before I posted it. Any remaining errors whether of omission or commission are my own.

    And of course, I make no claim of ownership of anything herein that is familiar from the GFFA. All familiar characters, places, and concepts belong to their copyright holder which I assume is either LucasFilm or GL himself or some combination thereof.

    KD

    *And when I say that - that is really saying something. I will try to get something up here at least every couple of months or so but as the posts to this thread will probably inter-relate with other tales I am working on they will only arrive as those tales are posted. Self-referential art. How twee.


    ********************************************************
    Sketches in the River of Time

    Prologue

    ~~~~~~~~~~

    What the blazes is he doing in the middle of a space battle? I told him to stay in the hanger! No, I told him to stay in the cockpit. Blast!

    Distracted by the fear I feel from, and for Anakin, I am not quick enough to block the blow from the Sith?s unusual weapon. My body reacts before my mind and I drop my lightsaber to the floor. I hear your voice cry out in denial, and only then does the pain begin to make itself felt, and with it, my body collapse to join my saber. I block our bond because you will need all your concentration to survive this encounter. And you must survive this encounter, child. Child, I call you, but you are a child no longer. Nor have you been a child for quite some time.

    No! Obi-Wan, you must not use the rage you are directing at my killer. It may seem to make you strong, but it does not. The Dark Side is calling to you from your opponent, but you must ignore it. You have learnt this lesson already. You must remember it. You must trust in the Living Force as you have never done before, or you will not survive this. There are longer paths to death than the one I am taking. Do not give the Dark Side an opening into your mind.

    I feel the Sith use the Dark Side to land a Force-push to your chest and I see you fall into the pit. I have no breath to scream, but it echos in my mind nonetheless as the echos of your lightsaber falling after you roll through the chamber. I unblock the bond between us to tell you all that I have not, before it is too late, and as I do, I realize that you have caught yourself somehow. Ah, on a projection in the wall of the pit. Clever, wonderful, stubborn padawan. You are concentrating on how you can defeat the Sith, and so I close the bond once more before the next painful breath I must take distracts you. I find the strength to live for a few more breaths because in that glimpse into your mind I see that you have found your trust in the Living Force and have gathered the Force to you for a final effort.

    You arc up out of the pit and over the menace before you, calling my saber to your hand as you rise. Turning, you use a swift stroke of my weapon and the duel is over at last. You pause a moment. I wonder if you are concerned that he may not have died. I can assure you he did. I felt the sudden release of dark energy, trying yet to turn one of us at the last moment. This time it swirls about me, the weaker of its potential targets, But I will not let myself be taken from you yet. The Force is not done with me. It has a burden for you and it will make me bi
     
  2. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Mar 1, 2002
    Oh, that was so sad. Qui-Gon trying to reach Obi-Wan and not having enough breath to tell him how much he loved him. I liked how you had the Force push Qui-Gon to do its bidding. Lovely.

    Looking forward to more.
     
  3. Knight_Dilettante

    Knight_Dilettante Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 24, 2002
    Cool! A discerning reader. 8-}

    There will certainly be more. Very soon (days) I will be posting Book 1. Then there will undoubtedly be a break for a bit before Book 2 appears (weeks I hope rather than months). And so on.

    There will be a lot more Obi-Wan in the rest. So this first post really is deceptive in a way.

    Thanks for reading and even more for commenting!

    KD
     
  4. PadawanKitara

    PadawanKitara Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 31, 2001
    I like your explanation of what happened in the film. well done
     
  5. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2004
    From the moment I brought Anakin with me away from Tatooine, we were lost.

    This line was so poignant, so Qui-Gon! I LOVED this and I don't know what else to say.
     
  6. Knight_Dilettante

    Knight_Dilettante Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 24, 2002
    Thanks for reading PadawanKitara. From the first time I saw TPM I wondered what Qui-Gon was thinking as he lay there unable to move. I thought it must have been very difficult for him to be unable to help Obi-Wan, especially when Maul knocked him into the pit.

    VaderLVR64, thank you for reading and commenting also. Your This line was so poignant, so Qui-Gon! is the sort of compliment that is extra nice when one is writing someone else's characters. And no writer could possibly resist I LOVED this. Thanks.

    Thank you both, you have made me feel much better about having to hare off to work soon on what is supposed to be a day off.

    I'm still tweaking Book 1 (well, still writing it too for that matter) but I hope to post Chapter 1 of it soon.

    KD
     
  7. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2004
    Up you go! This one is too good to miss.
     
  8. Mistress_Renata

    Mistress_Renata Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 9, 2000
    Yes. So tragic, that all the things he wanted to say to Obi-Wan, but the need kept him restrained to saying only the most important urgent thing. A wonderful scene, and so well described.

    (Ah, Kitara, dianethx, how well she knows us! ;) )
     
  9. Healer_Leona

    Healer_Leona Squirrel Wrangler of Fun & Games star 9 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jul 7, 2000
    I missed this one k_d... I'm so glad you asked to have it unlocked. :D :D

    lWow, lQui-Gon may not have been able to tell Obi-Wan all he wanted, all he felt, but you certainly managed to bring me to tears.. I can't wait for more now!
     
  10. Zebra3

    Zebra3 Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Aug 28, 2004
    I would spare you it all if I could, my son.

    :_| Oh wow! Very sad and touching! Excellent! :_|
     
  11. WhosScruffyLooking

    WhosScruffyLooking Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Nov 30, 2004
    :_| :_| :_|

    I don't know what else to say! So sad and tragic.

    Nicely done!
     
  12. LukesTheMan

    LukesTheMan Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Apr 30, 2004
    Truly amazing! I don't know what else to say!
     
  13. Knight_Dilettante

    Knight_Dilettante Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 24, 2002
    Thanks, Leona for both the unlock and the comment. And my thanks also to Zebra3, WhosScruffylooking (great name, btw!) and LukesTheMan for reading and posting such lovely comments. I'm glad ya'll enjoyed it. This thread is supposed to be a catch all for various things that I produce that don't end up getting their own threads. There will be a connecting element as well, which should be clear in a post or two. I hope to have more up in a couple of weeks. And perhaps should have waited until that was ready before asking for the unlock but, well, patience was never my strong suit.

    KD
     
  14. Shaindl

    Shaindl Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 18, 2002
    Hey! How did I ever miss this? KD, this was just wonderful! I've seen a lot of "just what the hell was Qui thinking there on the floor when he never even told Obi-Wan he loved him?" stories, but this is by far the best. Very plausible, which I like. :)

    Lovely job - glad there's more to come...

    Shaindl
     
  15. JadeSolo

    JadeSolo Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 20, 2002
    Unlocking and upping. Beautiful vig! Did I just say that about a Qui-Gon story? :p
     
  16. Knight_Dilettante

    Knight_Dilettante Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 24, 2002
    Thanks Jade! Both for the unlock and for the comment. I promise I won't tell on you. ;)

    And my extremely embarrassed, extremely late thanks to Shaindl for the lovely comments on the first post of this thread. Somehow I kept not getting the next bit ready until this locked again. I do hope to not repeat that ridiculous performance again.

    So thanks very much Shaindl and Jade!

    KD
     
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