Before - Legends Stolen On The Wind-A Completed AU Obi-Wan/Qui-Gon Vignette-Author Replies 8.18

Stolen On the Wind
A Vignette by LuvEwan
*~*
PG

Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me.
*~*
This is based on a plot bunny devised by the evil Athena Leigh . I didn't want to do it, because I obviously have others to work on, but it was just toooooo tempting. So thank you. It was a beautiful idea, but very difficult to get down on paper. I know I didn't do it justice, but it was a nice experience.
~*~
A pivotal event plays out a bit differently in the lives of Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi, that proves to test the limits of forgiveness. Partial AU.

Main Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Qui-Gon Jinn

~*~

The leaves fell first.

It wasn't the wind that drew them from the branches, to drift in almost pearlescent scraps of emerald to the ground. No, the air stirred up afterward, and sent them in spirals, a brief reprise, only to drop back to the grasses again.

By then, the waxy green was mottled, rotten black.

For the outcroppings of the Teaplisi tree were completely dependent on the wood to which they were joined. Once plucked, their tiny, delicate systems went into a frenzy, and shriveled to their death. If some cruel assailant didn't interfere, their fate remained the same. The leaves would detach, at a time imbedded in their verdant little veins, and suffer the quick effects of their separation.

The leaves fell first, and then the wind came, perhaps in nature's attempt to boost them up to their intended place once more?or, maybe, it was but a surprised gasp. In either case, no one could explain what brought the breezes.

Obi-Wan Kenobi was only thirteen years old, so he supposed his guess wasn't quite as good as any. But, he was pretty certain what jumpstarted the massive suicide of this Teaplisi's shroud. As soon as he settled himself against the trunk, he saw the first leaf rebel, rocking downward, ends already tingeing with shadow.

Thirteen?

He sat up in a skull-wracking burst, the diluted landscape of the forest replaced by open space and heavy blankets. Obi-Wan eased back on his elbows once the jolt from dream to awareness gave way to clarity. Thirteen? He blinked and wiped his eyes. Now where the hells did THAT come from?

His room was painted in midnight, and even with Force-enhanced vision, he could barely make out the objects littering the darkness around him. It stood as a perfect canvas, on which anything could be vividly depicted, to emerge from the black blur. Ghosts sprung from such fertile soils. A decidedly non-Jedi-like thought, but some things gleaned plausibility when the moon was still high and fresh nightmares pulsed behind the eyes.

He blinked in the pall as the scattered pieces floated into their original composition, and the full remembrance slammed against him. Beyond the dark leaves on the whirlwinds, before he sat beneath the skeleton of the Teaplisi.

It was THE moment. The event that divided his life, labeling the 'before' and 'after', sanity and madness, heaven and the hottest circles of hell. The thickness that so often rose in his throat. The tightness that bound his bones and stole his breath.

The ultimate terror of his dreams.

Obi-Wan laid flat on his back and pressed a finger over his eyes to prevent the next stage of this familiar cycle. He always found it strange that his mind chose to replay the aftermath, that afternoon of emptiness and full heartbreak, instead of the instigator of it all. But it didn't matter, really. In cognizance, he always supplied that.

When he was sure the moisture was sealed, the young man slowly opened his eyes, felt them sting.

"You don't deserve the tears, Obi-Wan."

His world was suddenly balanced on a spindle, and turned at a dizzying clip, while he remained unmoving at the nexus, frozen. He stared at that face, lines drawn in contempt, lips curled in a snarl. His heart seized up. "No." He whispered into the void of his chamber. "I don't."

And he knew it. It was blazed into the forefront of his mind, the rasping little echo that was ther

 

Wow. Talk about endless despair. And Qui still doesn't know he hasn't reached him. LE, that was so heartbreaking! How dare you do this to us! Great work, as always, sweetie.

Shaindl

 

Ohhh talk about heavy angst!!! WOWZERS!!! I soooo love this line! It is sooo true about Obi!

Weariness circled his eyes. "There are two kinds of people, Obi-Wan. Those that think too highly of themselves. And those that think too little. You've spent these years thinking you weren't worthy of being treated as a human being. You've blamed yourself for her death, but no one else has. Do you understand that, Obi-Wan? NO ONE else."

I had to reread it to get the full of it! I couldn't read it all in one bout it was soooo touching!!

GREAT work!!!!

 

Qui-Gon dissolved in his grateful weeping, so he didn't hear the tiny little murmur, stolen on the wind.

"I can't."



Wow LE, if you had wanted to kill your readers, I am sure that there is a much less painful way to do it! And you were even kind enough to leave us dangling and wanting more!

That was great. If I had been in a different mood, I would have probably cried! (but alas, Ice Princess I remain). You write emotions and angst tremendously well, it makes me kind of jealous!

Here's hoping you keep trying to tear my heart out with more posts like that!

~The Captain

 

I am not evil! *cackles*

Oh, not do it justice? That was perfect! I loved how Obi-Wan convinced himself he was incapable of love, and the Master's words to him and trying to help but not knowing how. It totally would have happened like that. I know he would get through to him eventually. Poor Obi-Wan, I feel bad now. Hey, I love Obi-Wan too, he just isn't the one who needs defending from half the world. *hugs Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon and Tahl because she should never die!* Oh, it was so good. I was almost crying too!

Don't leave me, Obi-Wan. It isn't too late.
I-I never thought that when I lost my wife?I would have to lose my son, too.
I would choose you, my Padawan. I would always choose you.



Thank you so much.

 

You are trying to kill me, aren't you? Cause I'm going to die of despair after reading this. Oh, my, word!!!! Lovely language, lovely plot, lovely terrible guilt. I especially liked

Qui-Gon stroked the cropped spikes of hair, "And I choose you now, Obi-Wan. I choose you over complete desolation and the futility of a lonely life. I choose you because I know you still exist, beneath the false guilt." He reached out and, with acute tenderness, embraced his student. "I can't let you leave. I still believe we can find you, Obi-Wan."

Obi-Wan's head was tucked under his Master's chin, and for the first time in a decade, he felt?but then it vanished, under the mounds of ash. As he knew it would.

He leaned against Qui-Gon, and listened to his heartbeat, gradually bringing his arms around the man's waist.

Qui-Gon dissolved in his grateful weeping, so he didn't hear the tiny little murmur, stolen on the wind.

"I can't."

I can't??? I can't??? I'm going to hunt that man down and throttle him. Then give him a guilt trip that he'll never forget! Abandoning Qui-Gon as he has abandoned himself. Oh, he needs a good thrashing, or a good woman. Maybe LE would like to volunteer...

Great job, LE, yet again.

 

What else can I say LE, that was one of the saddest things you have ever written. It was beautifully written and it tore my heart out.

** wanders off in search of tissue **

 

LE!!! you just HAD to give in to her!! if that doesn't demand a follow up I don't know what does....




Poooor Qui and Obi ...

 

What haooened to the tissue alert? Whaaaaaa

 

Shaindl Well, I guess 'endless despair' would be the perfect description of Obi-Wan's life after an event like that, coupled with his natural tendencies toward guilt. I also tried to think of how I would react to that, and voila, the most pathetic version of Obi-Wan ever. Thank you for reading.

Kynstar Thank you, so much, for both reviews! I'm always so happy to know you're reading and enjoying.

C_O I nearly broke the Ice Queen? Maybe I'll write one where Obi-Wan and Tahl die...and Qui-Gon slips on a banana peel and breaks his hip...yeah... Thanks for reading.

Athena Oh, I'm sorry, but you are evil. Completely. This took me eight days to write. I don't know why, but I kept reaching these maddening points where I just couldn't get another idea out. I never even read it through once it was done, I was too scared to. I will eventually though, and catch all the mistakes you guys probably already have. Thanks again for the bunny.

diane You don't know how much your comments mean to me. Oh, he needs a good thrashing, or a good woman. Maybe LE would like to volunteer... Maybe? Make that definitely.

Sheila Thank you so much!

Layren I don't think I have it in me right now to do a follow-up, to tell the truth. But there would certainly be a plethora of ideas for one. My evil little head is spinning. Thank you so much for reading.

PK I don't give alerts. I like to catch you by surprise. That way, it's much much worse for you.

 

Awwwwwww, I'm not evil. I think my Padawan would have noticed and she insists I'm not. Though I am sorry to have distracted you from your other stories, but I too want to see those move along! I didn't see any mistakes, and I think this works great as a one piece, and I didn't ask for more so don't blame me if you do more! Unless you want to. Again, I love the story! *hugs it*

 

.....


You write the most beautiful things.....


Excuse me, I'm going to go cry in my corner now...


*waaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh!*

 

Heartbreakingly beautiful! This was so well written and so touching that I'm glad I wasn't having a bad day when I read it or I would be pretty darn useless right now. Lovely, lovely work. You're incredibly talented!

 

~Hey, I love Obi-Wan too, he just isn't the one who needs defending from half the world.~


Isn't that the truth!? Qui-Gon is always getting picked on or portrayed as a monster! I was afraid this was going to be another "Monster Qui-Gon" story. I'm glad I stuck it out and read the whole story!! Thanks!!

 

How heartbreaking, how sad! I'm sorry to your thoughts, but I think you did do whatever you were doing this for justice. This was so beautiful and so absolutely sad. I loved it, I loved it, I loved it. It was so well-written and plausible.

Brava!

-Krystal

 

I can?t much to the other posts but I enjoyed that sad, heart wrenching vig. You explained the changes and guilt he went through perfectly.

Wonderful work capturing their pain and I also loved that hard ending. I think the Sun just fizzled out here.

 

Athena I think the Pm explained everything.

Padawan Estel Thank you!

VaderLVR64 That means a lot, coming from one of the masters of vignettes!

KSkywalker I wanted to make sure Qui-Gon didn't come off as unfeeling or that he deliberately isolated himself from his Padawan. After all, I wouldn't want a ravenous pack of Qui lovers *looks at diane* to come after me. So glad you enjoyed it.

Krystal Thank you so much! I love getting reviews from you, as you're one of my favorite writers here.

Altaira New reader! So glad you liked it!