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Before - Legends Padawan Mine -- (Qui/Obi/ Xanatos one shot) -- Posted 5/18/06

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by WyoJedi, May 18, 2006.

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  1. WyoJedi

    WyoJedi Jedi Youngling star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 7, 2005
    Title: Padawan Mine
    Author: WyoJedi
    Timeframe: JA
    Characters: Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan, Xanatos
    Genre: Drama
    Summary: Response to challenge from brodiew... Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write a vig featuring Qui-gon Jinn in which he is separated from Obi-wan and must confront a enemy/ estranged friend from his past to assist in Obi-wan's rescue.
    Disclaimer: Thanks to George Lucas for creating a world I can lose myself in. Also, I do not claim ownership of anything within the official Star Wars universe.



    It had been two weeks. Two weeks since Obi-Wan had gone missing from the Meerian refugee center on Kur. He had gone there with a small contingent of Jedi to assist those evacuating Bandomeer due to the Offworld Mining Corporation?s devastating business practices. Qui-Gon had suggested that it would be beneficial for Obi-Wan?s personal growth to be a part of such a noble endeavor. Now he was not so sure.

    The investigation had begun immediately, and it was quickly determined that Obi-Wan had not just up and left but had been abducted. However any other information was not forthcoming. When the investigators on Kur threw up their hands in despair and confusion, Qui-Gon took over personally. He was not about to let his padawan just disappear into the empty blackness of space without exhausting every possible avenue.

    Due to the proximity of Offworld?s operation, and Xanatos? enmity toward Qui-Gon, he was sure there had to be some connection. The former investigators had dismissed this theory out of hand, believing that no one would go through so much trouble out of pure spite. But Qui-Gon knew Xanatos better than anyone, knew the lengths he would go in any situation. And his knowledge served him well.

    The information had come through a number of channels, bouncing between contacts in a dozen different systems. But they had finally led him here? overlooking the formal residence of Xanatos, corporate head of Offworld, and fallen Jedi. Qui-Gon made his way down the slope of the ridge he had been on, careful not to make a sound on the loose rocks. He had no idea as to the number of guards around the perimeter of the structure, only that there were some.

    As if on cue a guard came round the corner of the building. Qui-Gon quickly crouched to the ground, grateful for the darkness of the Telosian night. He watched as the guard looked around, almost as concerned at being seen as Qui-Gon was. The Jedi master realized why as the man removed a death stick from his tunic and prepped to administer it. Qui-Gon shook his head and raised his hand, using the Force to tumble some rocks to the right of the structure, away from his position. The guard quickly put away his narcotic and went to investigate.

    ?All too easy.?

    Once inside the residence Qui-Gon was surprised at the lack of security precautions. There were no guards inside, and the surveillance equipment was easily bypassed. He was pondering on the ease of his rescue attempt as he stepped out of the main hall, and the blast doors locked tight behind him.

    ?Welcome Master Jinn.?

    The voice seemed to come from everywhere, and it echo through the minute chamber Qui-Gon found himself in.

    ?Show yourself Xanatos. Your mind games won?t work on me. Face me and let?s finish this.?

    A slight laugh flowed through the room as the disembodied voice mocked his former master.

    ?All in good time Qui-Gon. You seem in an awful hurry to get yourself hurt. I thought you were here to rescue your precious padawan, but all along you only wanted revenge for my supposed betrayal.?

    Qui-Gon turned himself round the dimly lit room trying to gather his bearings as he attempted to calm himself through the Force.

    ?I have no thoughts of revenge Xanatos. Deliver Obi-Wan to me, and I will gladly leave you in peace.?

    Suddenly a door opened to Qui-Gon?s left and bright light poured into the room.

    ?We shall see, my old master. Come. We are waiting.?

    Qui-Gon hesitantly
     
  2. Healer_Leona

    Healer_Leona Squirrel Wrangler of Fun & Games star 9 Staff Member Manager

    Registered:
    Jul 7, 2000
    Very nicely done WyoJedi. I always enjoy a story where Qui-Gon must rescue Obi-Wan. :D
     
  3. VaderLVR64

    VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Feb 5, 2004
    The ending was perfect!

    ?Master??

    ?Yes Obi-Wan.?

    ?The next time there is a ?noble endeavor? that needs doing? you do it yourself.?


    A great story! =D=


     
  4. RK_Striker_JK_5

    RK_Striker_JK_5 Force Ghost star 7

    Registered:
    Jul 2, 2003
    Very nice, Wyo. Loved the last line Not fully familiar with Xanatos, other thn being the name of the main antagonist from Disney's Gargayoles. ;)
     
  5. KELIA

    KELIA Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jul 26, 2005
    Wonderful story.

    You did a great job capturing Qui-Gon's and Xanatos' characters.

    ?The next time there is a ?noble endeavor? that needs doing? you do it yourself.?

    [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh]

    loved the little bit of humor you worked in.

    Great job on your challenge

    =D= =D= =D= =D=
     
  6. dianethx

    dianethx Jedi Grand Master star 6

    Registered:
    Mar 1, 2002
    Nicely done. I especially liked the fight and the fact that Xan ran into the glass. Poor Obi-Wan. He never seems to get a break.

    Good job.
     
  7. WyoJedi

    WyoJedi Jedi Youngling star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 7, 2005
    Healer_Leona: Thank you! It seems that Obi-Wan has a knack for needing Qui-GOn's help a lot huh? It was great to be able to present this and have it be warmly received. Thanks again.

    VaderLVR64: I thought the ending was pretty good myself. I'm glad to hear that you liked it so well. Thank you.

    RK_Striker_JK_5: Thanks. I wasn't familiar with Xanatos either when I wrote this, so it really makes me happy to get all these responses saying how well I did. Brings a smile to my face.

    That's right... Xanatos was the villian in Gargoyles wasn't he? That was a good show.

    KELIA: Thank you. So many people liked the way I wrote the characters. I'm so giddy about that. Yay me!

    I have to put humor in even the most serious piece. It's just my way I guess. Thanks again!

    dianethx: The fight was a really fun part for me to write. And it seemed to all stem from the idea that I wanted Qui-GOn to hurt Xanatos but not kill him. Hence the broken glass. And Obi just has a hard time all around doesn't he? Thanks!

    Cheers,
    Wyo

     
  8. Jade_Pilot

    Jade_Pilot Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Dec 10, 2005
    You can write action as well as mush! What a versatile writer you are and fast! Two great vignettes to celebrate your 1,000th post.

    ?You can?t win old man! I?m younger? stronger? ?

    ?And more arrogant, I get the picture.?


    Well done! =D=
     
  9. WyoJedi

    WyoJedi Jedi Youngling star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 7, 2005
    Jade_Pilot: Thank you for your reply. I'm happy to hear you sayb that I write action well. I'm always concerned when I do it that I'm not getting my point across well enough. It's reassuring to know that isn't the case here :D

    I don't know about fast or versatile. I think it is more luck... It takes a while to get an idea, but once it's there I can produce a fic pretty readily. Thanks for all your kind words.

    Cheers,
    Wyo


     
  10. Valairy Scot

    Valairy Scot Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Sep 16, 2005
    Oh, very nice and a great ending as other's have posted.
     
  11. WyoJedi

    WyoJedi Jedi Youngling star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 7, 2005
    Valairy_Scot: Thanks for your reply. I'm glad you liked the ending. I just had to lighhten it up a little... too much drama is more than I can take :p Thanks again!

    Cheers,
    Wyo
     
  12. brodiew

    brodiew Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Oct 11, 2005
    Very good challenge response, Wyo. I liked Qui-Gon's stealth action at Xan's citadel. I also thought Xan was equisitely evil. He was intesely dark and angry.

    He wearily arose, a large glass shard protruding from his abdomen. He stumbled as he tried to keep his balance and he shook his head to try and clear away the fog his injuries brought on. When he finally spoke his voice came as red and hot as the blood that flowd from his wounds.
    ?You will pay for this Qui-Gon Jinn. You will pay for it all! My father, my stolen youth, everything! You and all the Jedi. I?ll make you pay!?


    Great imagery, Wyo. Xan probably lives, but OUCH! Xan intense words so completely display his delusion.
     
  13. WyoJedi

    WyoJedi Jedi Youngling star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 7, 2005
    brodiew: Thanks! It was very interesting writing these characters, since I have not done much with them before. I kinda took my cue on Qui-Gon's stealth from the scene in Ep 1 where they steal away on the Trade Federation transports. It seems like he could be quite sneaky if he needs to be.

    I really enjoyed writing Xan... of course I always like writing dark characters. They are so much more fun! And yes Xan lives and goes on to torment the Jedi, attempting assassinations, etc. Thanks again!

    Cheers,
    Wyo
     
  14. Lady_Snow_Kaguya

    Lady_Snow_Kaguya Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Jun 9, 2005
    ?You can?t win old man! I?m younger? stronger? ?

    ?And more arrogant, I get the picture.?


    Obi-wan is rubbing off on him...XD Cute moment in the darkness!
     
  15. WyoJedi

    WyoJedi Jedi Youngling star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 7, 2005
    Lady_Snow_Kaguya: Yes Obi-Wan has rubbed off on him some... I can just imagine Liam Neeson's voice reciting that line. I'm glad you liked it. Thank you so much for your comments.

    Cheers,
    Wyo
     
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