Coming Home (post TPM AU) NEW POST 10-07-02

Dear all who read my work,

Have noticed I haven't been posting much.

Many excuses I have.

Trying to remedy this I am.

New fic I have started in hopes of getting back in the habit.

You now have license to come after me as a mob if I don't post more often. (BTW, I did actually start a post on Jedi Dreams, so if it's not up by next weekend, feel free to harass me).

Let me know what you think. This bunny has been bothering me for awhile. Much angst and sweetness ahead. Also more angst.

--AWK

* * *

"This is the palace hanger, the location of two key skirmishes in the Trade Federation War. The first of these was during her Royal Highness Queen Amidala's attempt to flee Naboo during the invasion." Boss Nass tried not to grumble. This tour of Theed historical sites of Mekanics War had been going on for more than half an hour already and he was yet to hear anything about the contributions of the noble Gungan people. Naboo this, Naboo that, but no Gungans.

"In this key battle," the tour guide continued, "the Queen, having been freed by two Jedi knights escaped with her personal security chief, and a squadron of pilots under the command of Ric Olie. The Jedi were ambassadors, sent by the then Chancellor Valorum to negotiate with the Nemoidian Viceroy. When the negotiations failed-"

"The negotiations never took place," a deep voice interrupted. All eyes, including those of the startled tour guide, turned to the tall, brown-robed figure at the rear of the group.

"Excuse me?" the flustered guide asked. "Do you have something to-" Her tone became abruptly more polite and apologetic as she realized the significance behind the hooded man's neat, humble attire, "to share, Sir Jedi?"

The Jedi's face remained hidden, but he nodded, accepting the silent apology evident in the young girl's eyes. "Yes," he began in quiet tone, barely above a whisper. Greater volume proved unnecessary; the group of tourists, historians and schoolchildren dared not make a sound. "The negotiations with the Nemodians never took place. The two Jedi were themselves forced to flee the control ship and made their way down to the planet after the Viceroy attempted to have them killed."

The guide's eyes widened. "It sounds like quite the harrowing trip."

The figure nodded. "Indeed."

A blush stole over the girl's cheeks. "Have I made any more mistakes, Sir Jedi?"

The dark brown hood shifted, as if the unseen Jedi beneath the robe had tilted his head, considering her question. For a moment he remained silent in thought. "Neither of them held the rank of knight." The tour guide and several of the group frowned in confusion and cynical doubt. "Jinn held the rank of Jedi Master, while Kenobi was a padawan, an apprentice not yet knighted." Before the girl could blush more the man continued. "However, outside of the Temple, all Jedi between the ranks of Senior Padawan and Master may be referred to as knights without ruffling any feathers." There seemed a touch of gentle amusement in his voice. The girl smiled back gratefully and continued her speech. Several people, Boss Nass included, gave the Jedi unusual looks, but since his attention had apparently been returned to their guide, most soon did likewise.

Boss Nass however was not like most. Furrowing a brow unwrinkled by decades spent out of the sun, but marred by rolls of fat accumulated in years of well-catered political functions, the now-retired Gungan leader stared at the strange, earth-toned apparition. He had gone on this tour every year (and always grumbled about the lack of recognition of his people's efforts and sacrifices), but he had never seen a Jedi on this tour before.

Apparently neither had their tour guide.

" . . . the elder, um, Master Jedi was able to cover the Queen and her entourage as they boarded her Majesty's Royal Starship, behind me, while the younger, um, Padawan? Um, Jedi was able to free the pilots, who sat under guard, there." The girl chewed her lip nervously as she sought the Jedi's hooded gaze. He

 

That was masterfully and beautifully written. I never would have thought of a museum like that! I kept thinking it was Obi-Wan who'd survived, of course, until I got to the end. Loved the way Boss Nass claimed they could hear the baby all the way down in Otoh Gunga, and the way the Jedi agreed that it took after its father. *hears echo of "Yippeee!"*

*draws both blasters at the same time, aims, and checks aim, twirls each blaster around each index finger a few times, then returns the blasters to their holsters in one swift, gracefully-coordinated movement. Adds a few extra stun-grenades to belt, rejects the idea of a thermal detonator, sits down and leans back in chair, crossing booted legs on the table, ready to leap up and join the mob if the promised post for Jedi Dreams does not show up as scheduled.*

 

Great story. Very nice beginning. But I'm a little confused. The Jedi was talking about Obi-Wan right? And it's been 15 years since Naboo but you said that he would have been 50 this year. Obi was in his twenties then. At the most he would be 40. Sorry to be so picky but it was bugging me. Unless you've changed the ages too. If so, then forget this whole thing.

Anyway, very nice. I can't wait to find out what happened to Obi and everything else. The Jedi was Qui-Gon right?

~Swede

 

The museum and the statues were put up fifteen years from the present time in the story (for the tenth anniversary of the war). If Obi-Wan was 25 then, which is how old I thought he was, he would be fifty if he were still alive.

Of course, as my fellow TAs will attest, Alli-Wan can't add for beans.

Thank you for reading, hope that clears it up. I will check back later to make sure I didn't screw it up in the text somewhere, but it was my intent to make this scene 25 years post-TPM.

--AWK

 

Ah. Ok, now I get it. Yes it adds up. I thought it was 15 years from the battle, not 15 from the 10th anniversary. Thanks for clearing it up.

 

Thanks for sharing.

I, too, thought you were talking about Obi-Wan visiting the museum. I only thought it could be Qui-Gon when you said that 'he' would have been fifty. Unlike others I did understand that it was playing 25 years after TPM. That scene where the school girls were laying flowers for the statues, nearly got me crying... *sniff*

Thank you.

 

This was wonderful Alli-Wan, so beautifully written I found myself sniffling a bit towards the end. I kept expecting the mysterious Jedi to be Obi-Wan right up to the end, so I was surprised to find it was Qui-Gon even though many of the little clues were jumping up to nip at my subconsious at my first reading. Of course I went right back to reread again and look for those clues. I love the subtlety you used in putting them in, a real nice touch.

Glad to see you writing some more, I always hate to nag at authors because I know how busy RL can be, especially for students... buuutt, since you've sort of given us permission to nag a bit for new parts and stories you can be sure I will be asking about Jedi Dreams and Appearances and whatever else I can get out of you.

 

NO, no, no, no, no - I absolutely do NOT have time to get hooked on another fic - but this - this is absolutely, stunningly beautiful, and I can't resist.

Nice surprise that isn't really, when you think about it. The actions throughout are more characteristic of Qui-Gon than Obi-Wan - once you stop to think about it.

But oh, how sweet and heartbreakingly tender to think that the Master would still miss him - and still mourn him - through all those long years.

Absolutely exquisitely written - and forgive me if I've mistaken you for another writer - but isn't Appearances also yours, and, if so - AHEM - when are you going to finish it, because I absolutely adored it?

Please post soon and often.

 

This is more than one post?!!?

Yeeeahhh!!

I had a niggling of the fact that it was Qui-Gon but then I didn't think it was...

BAM!

That was really nice.

 

The figure slips down the halls and cautiously opens the door. In the corner of the padded room, sitting on the floor in a corner, is Mistress Renata, with her knees drawn up to her chest and her head bowed.

"I have good news," whispered the messenger. "Alli-Wan's posted again!"

Renata rocks back and forth. "No... lies, all lies..." she says. "Alli-Wan starts stories, draws you in, and leaves you forever... forever, wondering..."

"But it's true! She wrote a new story! She promised to finish Jedi Dreams!"

"No! Lies, all lies! You aren't real! This isn't real! Go away!"

**********

See what happens when you leave your readers hanging for too long?

 

Appearances and Jedi Dreams were the first two stories I read at this site. This is as beautifully written as those two stories. Welcome Back. But, please promise that you will work on ALL of your stories.

 

Two posts in two days.

Will the miracles never cease?

Yes, probably, but with luck, not before JD is done.

Glad many of you liked the idea of a museum. I figured I had to get Qui-Gon back to the spot, but I didn't want it to be as gloomy as it had been then.

Sorry about the confusion over the age thing. Assuming Ow and Qg were 25 and 60 respectively, Ow would have been 50 at this time point and Qg is 85.

Yes, CYNICAL21, "Appearances" is another one of mine. Got off track after 9/11 and then my mom decided to sell her house and I had alot of lab work to do. It's also on my to do list.

I can't make any promises about when I'll get anything done, I can only promise to try. (Right now I am TAing again, and the students seem to think the whole of my existence revolves around telling them what is going to be on the test in the classes they skipped. One day I will be the most-hated professor on campus. In the meantime, the answer to the question is "what we covered in class.")

Well, enough about my non-existant life. Here's a little something, since my friend was kind enough to cheerlead me through it over IM. Thanks friend!

And thank you all for responding. It's nice to start getting this bunny off my back and nice to know I haven't lost my touch completely. This post is very different, a little comic relief, so let me know if I overdid it.

--AWK


* * *

The sound wailing grew louder as the aging human and Gungan made their way through Theed Palace. By the time they had reached the same floor as the Naberrie-Skywalker living quarters, Boss Nass had thrust thick digits in both ears. Several guards sported comm pieces in one ear and ear plugs in the other. A harried looking woman, who could either be a handmaiden or a lost mental ward patient stumbled out of the nursery, eyes on the floor and collided head on with the tall Jedi. With her hands filled with bottled formula and his hands occupied with shielding his ears, the impact was not without consequences. Both the master's robe and the handmaiden's tunic were doused in cold soymilk.
"What the Sith is the matter with you, you, you big, dumb ox?!" A small, delicate fist, nails uncharacteristically gnawed pounded at Jinn's now soggy robe. "Can't you watch where you are going?" the young woman continued to holler as she jerked up her exhausted face to meet him. "Are you stupid or something?"

Wary of the raging emotions storming within the girl, Qui-Gon carefully took her by the shoulders. "Eirtaé?"

"Let go of me you slimy piece of pood--, Master Jinn!" The mood swing was both instantaneous and alarming. Qui-Gon was vaguely aware of the still dripping baby bottle falling from her hands as she clasped his elbows. "You came, or bless you Gracious Jedi, you came!" Eirtaé looked as if she were having some sort of profound spiritual experience.

"Eirtaé, are you quite alright?" The Jedi was beginning to grow concerned. Eirtaé was the most proper of Amidala's handmaidens. Perfectly coiffed, perfect manners, perfect control. Not today. No, today her hair was wild and unkempt, her subtle cosmetics non-existent, and she appeared to have a significant quantity of vomit crusting her left shoulder. Not to mention the wild look in her eyes and the faint aroma of sour milk. He was starting to lose circulation as her fingers dug into his forearms.

"No, no, no I'm not alright, I'm fabulous because you're here, you've come, and Ani said you could fix it. Please, you have to fix it! He won't stop crying!" The young woman was now pleading, tears in her eyes. "Please, do your Force, . . . stuff and make it stop!"

"Hesa been crying every time mesa been here," Boss Nass put in helpfully. "Nothing theysa done is making him stop. Crysin all the time."

Qui-Gon nodded in concern, the turned back to Eirtaé, subtlely bringing his hand into her line of sight. "Eirtaé, how long has he been crying?"

The young woman swayed slightly and her eyes half-closed. "All day. And he cried all night. He slept for two hou

 

OMG

I'm crying my eyes out. That was so sad.

"Goodbye Obi-Wan. I love you."

Right there I couldn't hold my tears back anymore. That was just wonderful. I..I can't wait for more.

*starts crying loudly and runs out of thread*

 

LOL! This was a nice amusing post, just what was needed after the previous. This brought back memories, there's nothing worse than a crying baby who won't stop no matter what you do. Will formula stain brocade? Formula stains everything! And it's permanent, the only thing more permanent is a teething biscuit mixed with baby saliva. Let one harden to the floor and it's there forever, you could mortar bricks together with that stuff.

Despite the humor in this post there is an undercurrent of seriousness. Why is the baby crying so uncontrollably and will Qui-Gon be able to help? I'm also curious, this is the second time that Qui-Gon has mentioned he no longer drinks, is there a reason for that? JarJar milk? (shudder)

 

What? The fic goes on? I really thought it was just a one-post wonder, a sort of vignette thing. I'm not sure whether to be happy about the new post or irritated that it isn't part of "Appearances" -- just kidding. I'm happy!

I loved the part where Boss Nass thumps Qui-Gon on the back and tells him that he always knew he was brave. And the part where Qui-Gon put Eirtae to sleep. And the fact that she'd been chewing her fingernails -- great detail! If she looks that bad, wonder what the poor parents look like?

 

Lovely balance (although I'm still reeling from the beautiful anguish of the first post). I can STILL see it in my mind's eye - which is decidedly teary.

Like anyone who's EVER dealt with it, I know there is absolutely nothing more nerve-wracking than a crying child that absolutely will NOT be soothed. And since Amidala is - obviously - no longer a spring chicken here (let's see, doing math in head - never a good idea for me - but I'm thinking she's 41 here) her patience is undoubtedly wearing super thin.

Still can't get over it: He's DEAD - and he's been dead for 25 years. O-o-o-o-h-h my poor Obi.

You know - I seldom read fics in which he's not around - but your amazing narrative has already snagged me.

PLEASE continue - and please just offer us some reassurance that you will - someday - complete "Appearances". Haven't had the pleasure yet of reading "Rebel Dreams" - and maybe that's not necessarily a bad thing - until you finish it.

 

So I can't do math. So sue me. I'm a bio major not math major. The only thing I need to be counting are how many legs are on one segment of a chilopoda (centipede). I didn't think I'd ever use something like that here.

Anyway, I'm glad you posted again. I'm getting a bad feeling from everyone else about how much this will get posted on. I do hope you finish. I really want to knew what's going on. And I'll stay away from any ages and dates. I'll let someone else worry about that. I love the fact that everyone is slowly going crazy because of all the crying. That kid has a good set of lungs on him.

~Swede

 

Oh Force! This story is great!

The first post made me cry it was so well written. I can't believe Obi's dead.

Looking forward to more posts!

 

Up up!

 

Between AlliWan's newest post and Abbi's commentary I have been laughing myself sick. And deeply dreading the arrival of my new nephew (due in 4 weeks) I don't think I can do that baby stuff again!

 

Huh?

I also thought this was only a one-post-story - not that I'm complaining, mind you!

I wonder what Qui-Gon's going to do about that screaming child...

 

Hit it over the head.

Sorry had to say that.

So when will a next post be up.

 

Upping here - in the desperate hope for a new post.

I have to admit that I still can't get the first post of this fic out of my mind - so let me just go whole hog here, and spit out what's in my heart.

I am soooooooo jealous! I believe the ultimate compliment, from one writer to another, is , "Boy, I wish I'd written that."

So, Alli-Wan - consider it said. And trust me when I say that my ego is sufficiently large for me never to say it, unless it's absolutely true. Therefore, you absolutely MUST post again soon.

Otherwise, we may have to form a mob, release the cyberdogs to trace you down, and hire Hutt bounty hunters to drag you in.

 

I think CYN is about to go into a "RRK HASN'T POSTED IN 2 DAYS!" rage. You must post quickly!