Searching for Remembrace (Repost)--JA Story *updated finally* (6/9)

Color me nostalgic but I felt an impulse to put this up again. One of my better attempts at writing JA. Err...at least I think so. Don't worry for those who have never read this before, the story is already completed. I'm just putting it up again b/c...well, these days I lack inspiration for a new story. Old fogie me.
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Title: Searching for Remembrance
Author: Healer Apprentice Lina
Timeline: Takes place after JA#6
Spoilers: Big ones for JA #1-6
Summary: Basically, this story is an alternative to JA #7, the Captive Temple. It'll start off with Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon leaving Melinda/Daan to rush back to the Temple where some evil force has attempted to kill Master Yoda. The enemy will NOT be Xanatos but something else that'll threaten the lives of everyone at the Temple. (PG-13)

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Obi-Wan Kenobi had never been completely comfortable around Qui-Gon Jinn. Ever since the intimidating Master sternly reprimanded him for letting his anger get the best of him defeating Bruck Chun during a duel, Obi-Wan always felt a bit awkward around the tall Jedi. He thought the discomfort would melt away after Master Jinn accepted him as a Padawan. And for awhile Obi-Wan thought progress was being made. Bit by bit, Qui-Gon seemed to slowly open up to his student. Allow Obi-Wan to take a peek behind his stoic mask.

But Obi-Wan now realized that the discomfort had never gone away. It had just become something both of them had grown used to. Like an old wound whose pain was hardly
acknowledged because it had been there for so long. It didn't mean it still didn't hurt.

Now, the awkwardness was making itself known inside Obi-Wan by about 10 fold as he readied to board the transport back to the Temple. In cases when he was unsure of what to do or say around Master Jinn, the teenager had usually remained silent and followed the Master a few paces behind him like an obedient Padawan.

But I'm not his Padawan anymore.

He wasn't sure if he should continue behaving as if he was. Should he walk a few paces behind? Would Master Jinn think he was being insolent for doing this? But he didn't want Qui-Gon to think he didn't want to be his Padawan.

I desperately do. More than anything else!

While the thoughts rolled around in Obi-Wan's head, the tall Jedi moved swiftly past him and boarded. "Hurry up," he ordered stiffly and disappeared into the transport.

Guess that gets rid of my question Obi-Wan thought miserably. Shouldering his one bag, the teenager began to walk up ramp. A sudden chill made Obi-Wan shiver and pull the cloak around him tighter. He lingered at the final step. Turning around, his eyes took in the Melida/Daan landscape.

He was leaving behind this place for good. A place he had once given up everything for. A person he had given up everything for. He was leaving behind Cerasi. The memory of the life dying behind her eyes burned in Obi-Wan's mind. The feeling of horror as he felt her slip and fade away from her place in the Force. That would follow him where ever he went, even if Cerasi did not.

"Now, Obi-Wan!" The frustrated shout from Qui-Gon broke Obi-Wan from his trance. Forcing his eyes to focus ahead, the student stepped in. The sound of the door sliding shut, quickly behind seemed to ring in his ears. They were leaving and going home.

No, Master Jinn is going home. I'm just leaving. Leaving everything.

As the transport rose into the skies and lifted the Jedi into the atmosphere, Obi-Wan felt his heart remain strangely grounded below.

 

Oh wow- I get the first response

I've never read this story before HAL, so thank you for re-posting.

 

Cool beans! I'm always psyched to hear that fresh eyes will be viewing old stories.

--HAL
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He was coming. Good. Very, very good. So long, so long, so long. I'd have to wait. So much waiting. So long. But soon. It shouldn't be such a bother. Just a little longer.

But they are on to me. It was a mistake to start with Yoda. I should have started smaller. Lost my thoughts. It had felt so good. Shouldn't have started with Yoda. But if I had, would he be coming? Probably not. Yoda is important. He's the one they'd all panic about. Always so important. Always
so wise. Always so loved. So respected. Wise Yoda. Always the clear thinker. Always looking into the future. Bet you never saw this, oh great Master! Too far beneath your notice, I'm sure.

No mistakes. Didn't make a mistake. It was good that I started with Yoda. Yes... very, very good. Come and save your beloved master then, Padawan. I'd be happy to see you try.

Just a bit longer. Just a bit longer. In the meantime... I'm hungry again...

*****
They were only an hour into the trip... meaning there were at least 14 hours of stony silence left to go. While Obi-Wan didn't feel along what was left of his bond with Qui-Gon, he knew his former Master had put up iron-tight shields. He could sense it. It was even tighter than it had been the
first time Obi-Wan had ever met Qui-Gon Jinn. In the span of a year, the distance between them had multiplied by a thousand from its starting point.

Obi-Wan fought the impulse to feel along the bond nonetheless. Even though he had been a
Padawan for a short while, he had grown used to the bond between him and his Master. Granted it was a weak one but it was one he enjoyed the feel of almost immediately. Obviously, Qui-Gon had not felt the same. The link between them was so weak now. As frail as the string in a spider's web. Only Obi-Wan's continued acknowledgement of it still being there kept it alive.

The silence continued as the small transport flew past the glowing stars. Having dwelled on his own misery, Obi-Wan's mind began to shift towards worry about what was happening at the Temple. Someone had tried to kill Master Yoda. The student couldn't imagine anyone being so...arrogant as to try and kill the small green Master.

Even Bruck. He's arrogant alright but he's not stupid.

The chirp of an incoming transmission broke through the quiet.

"Jinn here," Qui-Gon answered.

"Qui-Gon, you're on your way?" It was Mace Windu.

"Yes, Mace. About another 13 hours and we'll be there."

"There has been another attack. A student. She's dead."

Obi-Wan froze. A student? Don't let it be Bant! Not her! I can't lose her too!

"Who?" Qui-Gon's voice sounded strained.

"Padawan Monli. She was killed an hour ago."

For a brief moment, Obi-Wan felt a wave of relief, which was almost immediately replaced by guilt. She was probably a Bant to someone at the Temple.

"How was she murdered?" The Jedi Master kept his face neutral.

"The healers are looking her body over right now. They're still busy working on Yoda."

Qui-Gon nodded. "Please tell me when you have found out more, Mace."

"Of course."

"Thank you, old friend." He turned off the transmission.

There had been a warmth in his voice to Mace. A friendliness that made Obi-Wan's heart wrench. Master Jinn would never speak to him with such fondness ever again. If he ever did.

"Master? What happened exactly to Master Yoda?" Obi-Wan asked in a small voice, not realizing how he just addressed Qui-Gon. "Will he be alright?"

"I do not know that, Obi-Wan." Came the short reply. Another moment of silence lapsed. "Go and get some rest."

"I'm not tired," replied Obi-Wan automatically.

"Then get something to eat." The sharpness of Qui-Gon's voice alerted the teenager that it wasn't a suggestion. It was a dismissal. Obi-Wan could kick himself. He had come back into Qui-Gon's presence for less than a day and he had just tried to go against the Master's orders again! Obi-

 

OMG! I LOVED this story! One of my all time favourites Thank you soooo much for reposting it

 

I know I've read this, but I can't quite remember it, which means I get to enjoy it all over again.

 

Yes,please finish this one.I hope another post soon will come.Lurking these boards too long,now I sound like Yoda.You have another story I think?!??.The one where QGJ finds a little boy who looks just like Xani,now thats one I'm waiting on.Please forgive if its not your story.PEACE Ewen

 

No worries ewen . This story is already finished and just needs to be reposted.
Here's the next bit.
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If he concentrated hard enough, he could almost pretend that Obi-Wan wasn't there.

Ignoring him shouldn't be too hard, Jinn. You've been doing it even when he was your Padawan.

Qui-Gon sometimes wished the voice in his head was a real person so he could strangle it. Not a single sound emerged from the back of the transport to where Obi-Wan had disappeared to. The Jedi Master felt a twinge of regret at nearly shouting at the boy to get back there.

But it's better this way. Better that he stops looking to me as his Master.

He would be lying if he said that he wasn't still upset about Obi-Wan. He was. But he wasn't angry at him. It was the entire situation. The Master couldn't bear to continue sitting with his former apprentice. Obi-Wan's very close existence reminded him of his failures.

It isn't Obi-Wan. And it wasn't even Xanatos. No. Something is wrong with me. Something as a Master. Something that pushed both Xanatos and Obi-Wan to quit their dreams of being a Jedi. There is something wrong with me.

For a while Qui-Gon had felt that things were changing. For the last few months he had begun to believe that perhaps his inability to help Xanatos had been a single mistake. One that he could redeem himself from with Obi-Wan. But when he had seen the green blade flash in front of him, held by the same boy who had begged him to be his Master, he was wrong.

It was never Xanatos. It was me.

No, it would be better if they went their separate paths. Obi-Wan could get a non-deficient Master and he... he would never take another Padawan. It had been a mistake to try again.

A fortunate thing then that you never really grew too attached to him the voice piped up again.

 

I remember reading this somewhere! Or maybe something like it... anyway, great fic so far!!

 

Ok, now there are erie vocies that are hungry? Hungry for what??

 

Still lurking,still reading,still enjoying Q/O stories.I hope you FF writers keep writng Q/O stories after tonite{AOTC screening}.Peace Ewen

 

Nice to see you repost this HAL!! This is easily one of the best JA's written, heck one of the best anything written!!!!!!

 

I have always loved this story

 

I love this Lina. I never read it the first time around but I will the second.

 

Talk to him. Talk to him. Talk to him. Talk to him. The ever persistent guilt inside Qui-Gon's head had been badgering him for nearly 10 hours. The Jedi Master glanced over at the doorway that Obi-Wan had disappeared into and had not emerged from in all that time. He had assumed that Obi-Wan had fallen asleep.

Checking the navigations, Qui-Gon saw they were only a few hours away from Coruscant. A few hours to talk to him.

Quiet.

*****

Obi-Wan was running. He could feel his feet thudding against the hard ground as he sprinted towards his standing red-headed goal. He had to get to her before the blast did.

He reached the figure, who had her back turned to him and touched her shoulder. She turned towards him, the familiar bright eyes looking surprised at his presence. There was not blaster shot to be heard.

"Cerasi?" he asked, uncertainly. What was going on? The girl shook her head. "Cerasi?" Obi-Wan asked again.

As soon as the question left his lips, he watched in horror as a crimson stain bloomed in the center of Cerasi's chest and spread at an unstoppable speed.

"Too late," she whispered.

*****
The sounds of terrified screams had Qui-Gon run to the back of the transport. Throwing open the door, he found Obi-Wan tangled up in a blanket, thrashing wildly. Not knowing what to do exactly, he grabbed the boy's flailing arms.

"Obi-Wan! Wake up! Wake up!" he shouted over the student's cries.

"No, no, no!! Let go! Let go of me!" Obi-Wan yelled, still fighting his dreams.

"Stop it, Obi-Wan!" Qui-Gon tightened his grip on the arms and gave the boy a quick shake, his concern beginning to grow.

"I have to get to her! Let go!"

Running out of options, the Jedi Master did the only other thing he could think of. Momentarily re-opening the link he shouted across their bond,

//Wake up, Obi-Wan!//

The boy's eyes snapped open at the message. He glanced around the room frantically, for a moment not knowing where he was. His eyes fell back on the familiar weathered face that was still staring at him with an intent concern. Before Qui-Gon could react, the arms he had been clutching now were thrown around his neck in a desperate hold. Stunned, the Master hesitantly placed his own hand on the boy's back. They sat that way for a long while, the only sounds in the
room being Obi-Wan's soft crying.

Suddenly, it seemed to dawn on the student just what he was doing. He quickly loosened his death grip on Qui-Gon and pushed away quickly, as if he had just been licked by fire.

"I- I- I'm s-sorry, Master Jinn" he stuttered out. The teenager wiped his tears with the back of his hand. "I'm sorry... I forgot... where I was for a minute," he apologized quietly. His eyes remained
shamefully downcast, not daring to look up into that face. He could feel his own face burning with humiliation at what he had just displayed.

A pause lapsed. Qui-Gon moved to speak when a sharp beep from the pilot's seat beat him to it. They were about to descend onto Coruscant.

 

Yup, i've definitely read this somewhere. EPISODE 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I GET TO SEE IT TODAY!!!!!!!

 

That was great Lina. I hope all turns out well for Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon.

 

Qui-Gon tore his eyes away from Obi-Wan's face to glance back at the cockpit. The beeping continued on, demanding the Master's attention. For a minute, Qui-Gon was unsure of what to do. Strangely, it was Obi-Wan who saved him the pondering time.

"We're here, Master Jinn," he said, quietly. Obi-Wan looked up at the Jedi Master, his gaze unwavering. In that single gaze, the student was telling Qui-Gon to go to the cockpit. He was fine.

Qui-Gon felt an unfamiliar feeling rush inside his chest. Not having felt it in such a long time, he couldn't put a name to it for a moment.

It was gratitude.

Moving back up the cockpit, Qui-Gon flipped on the transmitter and sent his request.

"Coruscant, this is Master Qui-Gon Jinn requesting immediate landing, over."

There was a shriek of static that burst throughout the transport. Qui-Gon winced and turned the volume down. He frowned. What was going on? Obi-Wan had made his way up to the cockpit as well and had his own worried expression regarding the persistent static.

Finally, through the disturbing sound came a faint reply. "Landi------est--------grante--aster--inn."

Almost out of habit, Obi-Wan shot his former Master a puzzled look. While he did not return it with one of his own, Qui-Gon replied, "Something is very wrong."

But being out of options, the Jedi Master accepted the permission to land of sorts and began to descend the craft. Obi-Wan strapped himself in and gazed down at the Temple structure as the transport slowly lowered.

Obi-Wan had once thought the Temple to be the center of all that was good and loving. His home. Staring at the high towers of the place now, Obi-Wan felt an ominous shadow cast over his heart.

Something was very, *very* wrong.

*****
He's here. He's here. herehereherehere. I know you're here, Jinn. I can feel you. Finally. Finally. It was now time. At long last after years of waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting.

But be cautious, yes? No mistakes now, yes? Be careful and be patient. Of all the Jedi sayings and pompous lessons, the teaching of patience was the only one that is useful. Be wary and patient. Be patient and strike when you are ready. You have already started the war.

Not that much time, though. Not after that little girl Padawan. She had been good. Very very very good. But they'd grown smarter. Began the move. But no matter. The ones I want are here. Right here. Staying like good little Jedi. Now noble, how brave, how foolish. You're here, Jinn. I know you are. And you've even brought back someone with you.

I'll see you soon.

*****
As the transport gently hit the ground with a barely heard *thud*, Obi-Wan felt his anxiety increase by tenfold. The feeling of something being wrong rang in his head like a warning bell. He thought to perhaps tell Qui-Gon but quickly caught himself. He'd been enough of a nuisance for one day.

Gathering his things, Obi-Wan followed the tall Jedi in silence as they stepped off the transport. There was no one to greet them upon their arrival. Not a single person. In fact, the entire Temple seemed devoid of the lively population that Obi-Wan had grown up with.

Tentatively casting out his senses, to his horror, Obi-Wan only felt a few shimmering Force signs.

"Master! Where is everyone? I can't feel them!" The student exclaimed, without thinking. But Qui-Gon didn't seem annoyed at the outburst. He too looked worried.

"I can't either. We better-"

Before he could finish the sentence, a familiar tall figure appeared at the entrance of the Temple and rushed towards them. It was Mace Windu.

"Qui-Gon! You're here! Thank the Force, I've been trying to reach you for hours."

"Mace, what is going on? Where is everyone?"

The dark-skinned Jedi quickly shook hands with the other Jedi Master and began to usher him towards the door. "I'm glad to see you made it here, safely. Both of you," he gave Obi-Wan an unexpected warm nod. "We weren't sure just how far his strength was spreading."

"What is going

 

**cue ominous music**

Ohhh... it's getting better and better.

 

7

 

Obi-Wan walked quickly behind the two Masters, trying not to let the emptiness of the hallways get to him. It was creepy. The walls were still laced with the Force essence of the former residing students, knights, masters. It was like an area full of ghosts.

He was strangely glad when they reached the healer's ward. He wanted to see other people.

"Leona, they've arrived," Mace stated when the small healer came up to them. Behind her, Obi-Wan could see Leona's own Padawan, Lina Elani. For a minute, the student felt a bit better. Lina and he were the same age, having grown up together in the crèche. They had been separated two years ago when Lina was chosen by Healer Leona to be her Padawan. It was good to see an old friend. From behind Leona's shoulder, Lina spotted her friend and gave him a small smile.

"Thank the Force. We were getting worried," the healer spoke. She smiled warmly at both Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan.

"Hello Leona. Mace has told us some of the details," Qui-Gon said as he shook hands with the healer. Leona's eyes darkened as her gaze shifted towards a closed door.

"Yes. Padawan Monli is in there. Come with me," she instructed. Before Lina could follow her, Leona halted her stride. "Padawan, take Obi-Wan into the next room and get him something to eat." She turned to the teenager. "We've turned the infirmary into a second-rate mess hall as
well," she joked. "Go on, Padawan."

Obi-Wan wondered for a minute if she was calling him Padawan or Lina. The healer apprentice nodded obediently.

"Come on, I'll show you," she said, quietly. Obi-Wan glanced up at the Masters who shot each other a few worried looks. What was going on?

"They'll be fine in the next room," Leona assured and ushered the other two into the autopsy room. The door opened and slid shut before either student could see anything.

*****
Obi-Wan watched as Lina pushed a plate of food towards him. His own worries seemed mirrored on her face.

"Do you know what's going on?" he asked in a low tone.

"No. Master Leona only allowed me to help her for the first half of the autopsy. Then she just told me to get Master Mace and before long, everyone was leaving." Lina tried to keep the fear out of her voice. "I'm glad you came back, Obi-Wan," she said, quietly.

"Thanks." He gave her a small smile. "I wish I can say I'm glad to be back."

Lina frowned at his last comment but noticing the way he began to dig into the tasteless food, she thought it best not to ask right now.

*****
Qui-Gon gazed down at the pale face of the small girl lying on the table. She was so young. He had heard vaguely that Adia Monli had been chosen by Master Gaad a few months ago.

"Initial examination doesn't reveal how she was killed," Leona began in a neutral voice.

"Who found her?" Qui-Gon asked.

"Her Master. He came home and found her in the kitchen, lying on the floor. She was already dead."

Qui-Gon forced back the shiver that moved up his spine. He couldn't imagine the horror Gaad must have felt finding the body of his Padawan. If he had ever found Obi-Wan... he stopped his train of thought before it went any further.

Leona continued. "No visible physical trauma, like the life was just pulled out of her. But then I noticed this." She pulled back the sheet covering the girl to reveal the child's side. "Here." The healer pointed to the area just below the child's ribs.

At first Qui-Gon couldn't see anything and then he noticed a very small discoloration. Leaning in, he looked closer. His eyes slowly widened. It wasn't a discoloration. It was a mark. A chillingly familiar mark.

The Jedi Master looked up at Mace who silently nodded back to him. He had already seen it and he knew what it meant. Qui-Gon couldn't stop the shiver that sped down his body now.

"Talen," he whispered.

*****
During the middle of their meal, Obi-Wan noticed Lina continuously glancing at the closed door. He shot the other Padawan a quizzical look.

"Master Leona is worried," the girl replied.

"How can you tell?"

"I

 

ohhhhh

 

dun, dun, dun....

 

I'm caught up again. Can't wait to see some more.

 

Post, please!!!

LP

 

Please the next post, hurry I don't think those Padawans should be by themselves. 7