Qui-Gon's Error~Re-post~JA AU anguish~

Title: Qui-Gon's Error
Author: Neobi
Spoilers: JA15
Summary: Takes place during JA15. Instead of them both going to help the miners only Obi-Wan does, and Qui-Gon pays a very high price for the error.
Author's Note: While I really liked the way the frist one was this one is better. I've added parts and fixed many mistakes. So I hope you guys enjoy this re-post of Qui-Gon's Error. (first post will be up shortly)

Italic : thought

Disclaimer: All characters and places belong to Gorge Lucas.

 

Obi-Wan Kenobi heard the transport and looked up; out of the corner of his eye he could see Qui-Gon Jinn, his master, do the same.

"What is it?" The young blonde orphan named Eritha asked.

"Something's wrong," Obi-Wan said.

The small speck in the distance soon grew into a person, then a female with auburn hair snapping behind her, and finally as she pulled up next to them from maximum speed they saw Yanci.

"We need you," she gasped, sorely out of breath. "A raid?a massive raid?like nothing we've seen..."

She bent over, her hands on her knees trying to catch her breath.

"This time they are trying to destroy the entire camp," she said after a moment. "They are killing as many of us as they can. Using small explosives and blasters. We have rallied who we can and have made a last stand in an out-building. We have some weapons. Not many."

* * *

Obi-Wan scanned the horizon one last time with a wish that Qui-Gon would come back, but the horizon showed no sign of him. Obi-Wan struggled, wondering, hoping that he had made the right decision. Now he looked at the two women, opposite as day and night to each other.

"We should hide you, it's going to be dangerous and I can't let anything happen to you," Obi-Wan said his gaze still on Eritha.

"No, I will come. It will waste time if we have to find a place for me."

"All right but stay back." And with that they left for the settlement, hoping it was not too late.

* * *

You're wrong. Those words echoed in Qui-Gon's mind.

Maybe I am wrong, maybe I should turn back. Qui-Gon shook his head. "No, Obi-Wan can handle himself," he said aloud to himself, trying to reassure himself about his decision.

Finding the Absolutes hideout took longer than Qui-Gon expected. In agony he searched, knowing that if he took too long all would be lost, realizing that if Obi-Wan had been here his search would have moved faster.

Finally he reached a point where he had to leave his transport and walk through the ever-narrowing red passages.

***

As the three neared the village they could hear the screams of the people and endless stream of shots from blasters. Obi-Wan heard Yanci?s swoop accelerate to the limit, then he pushed his transport beyond the limit.

They stopped at the entrance to the village, jumping out of their vehicles. Yanci raced ahead to a body on the ground; she knelt beside him ignoring the blaster fire above her head. Tears ran down her face as she began to cradle the, obviously dead, person.

It wasn?t until somewhere in the back of her mind she heard Obi-Wan and Eritha call to her and by then it was too late, as she watched the explosive fly down to her.

Drawing his lightsabre as Obi-Wan ran, he went to the people that held the blasters, knowing he was desperately out numbered.

Bringing down his lightsabre down in a small arch he sliced through a blaster. Every time a body slumped to the ground Obi-Wan was drawn further into the circle of attackers that had formed around him. It wasn?t until he heard her screams that he remembered about Eritha.

 

LOL, same reaction I got the first time I posted it.

 

Hum.Sounds good.More?

 

Here's the next part...

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
For Qui-Gon, his search seemed to take hours, but in truth it was only a few vital minutes.

The ever-narrowing passages opened into a small canyon. The ground was a red mud, to his right there was a pit filled with water, and to his left there was the opening to a cave. Other than that, it was bare and showed no signs of life. Qui-Gon searched the area with the force, he could feel the life force of others and he could also feel the distanced and weak force signature of Tahl.

Qui-Gon looked at the cave once more before he decided to move, then slowly made his way towards it but before he could get even a few steps he felt something, something out of place. Slowly he turned to see ripples fan out across large pit that was filled with water. Quickly and silently Qui-Gon moved back to the passage and watched, hidden by the shadows. Finally a structure with a rounded top came up, then slowly it opened and a ramp came out. Two tech vehicles came down and raced into the cave, not giving anything around the area a thought. The structure retracted the ramp, closed, and then seemed as if was going too disappeared into the water liked it had appeared. But instead it once again rose, opened, and extended a ramp. This time a chain of vehicles went into the cave. Frustrated by the delay that had seemed to take hours Qui-Gon slide into the cave.

Once inside the cave Qui-Gon found a storage bin filled with tech jackets, and he quickly put one on. He continued to walk trough the cave trying to not to be suspicious. He walked by a tunnel lined with computers but then moved away as someone began to check the equipment. There were hundreds people working for the Absolutes because everywhere around him people moved. But since he looked busy and focused on what he was doing he was not bothered.

Qui-Gon took long strides further into the cave, focusing on Tahl's signature. He was near the back of the cave when he lost her signature. He drew the force more tightly around him searching the entire cave. At first he found nothing but then a very weak force of someone on the boarder of death. His heart raced and his pulse thumped in his head.

Oh dear force, please let me not be too late! Qui-Gon?s thoughts echoed in his mind.

Following the weak signature to a security check, Qui-Gon was able to determine Tahl was somewhere in there. Hiding in the shadows of a small indent in the wall was where he waited for someone to come.

Hope filled him once more as he heard the muffled steps of someone coming. It was Balog; the head of security and the first person that Qui-Gon saw go through the security check. Pressing his eye to the retina scanner, Balog punched in the code.

25869, 25869, over and over again Qui-Gon said the code in his mind, engraving it there.

Qui-Gon followed Balog in so closely had he have breathed he would have been given away. Balog walked torturously slow, turning into a tunnel that was ill lit. It seemed like Qui-Gon had been following Balog before they reached the end of the tunnel. Ahead Qui-Gon could barely see a door, without thinking twice about it and out of sheer rage Qui-Gon activated his lightsabre and ran it through Balog. Balog?s dead body slumped to the ground with out a sound, twitching once or twice before it stilled.

Qui-Gon hurried to the door slicing it open like an empty can. Inside he saw a box, shaped like a coffin, still used on many planets, leaning up against a wall. Near the top were it widened for the shoulders it had a small opening, so if you were in the box you could see out. There Qui-Gon could see her, barely, Tahl?s eyes were closed and he could see a burse, if he had have seen her entire face he would have known that it ran across her forehead.

She was alive, her eyes flickered open, like fireflies, and searched for him, even though no sight could be seen with them. After a moment, one so short compared to the time it took to find her, her eyes closed again. Qui-Gon inspected the box clo

 

Hmm. This is good Neobi. Missed it the first time 'round.
More?

 

Pushing his transport to the limit Qui-Gon raced to the miner village. Reaching out with the force Qui-Gon tried to contact Obi-Wan, but to his avail Obi-Wan was not there. For the first time he began to worry if his Padawan could truly have handled those that sought to wipe out the miner village.

As Qui-Gon's transport neared the village a chill came over him, a deathly chill. Qui-Gon stopped the transport a few feet away and slowly walked to the village. Near the edge of the village he stopped where an explosion had taken place. People had been there, for scraps of clothing, hair and blood bordered the black scorch mark on the ground. With little thought he dismissed the sight and continued on.

A few feet further he saw a crumpled mass of cloth and golden hair on the ground. Slowly he turned the body over; he closed his eyes in horror to see that the body was that of Eritha. The poor girl had been killed and that was the nicest thing done to her that day, by the way her clothes were torn. He stood slowly looking around. He saw nothing but the bodies of those he had not known or had but only for a moment continue on for what seemed like miles. Scared of what he might find he continued.

Qui-Gon tried to locate Obi-Wan through their bond once again but when he did he found that the bond was not there, it had been destroyed in his rage. Slowly he searched the area for a life, but found none. Realizing the only way to find Obi-Wan was to look at each body he painstakingly went to each body turning it over slowly, with each face that wasn't Obi-Wan's Qui-Gon felt slightly relieved.

It wasn?t until a few miles from the end of the village that it became clear where transports had gone. Off in the distance Qui-Gon saw a crumpled figure. Painfully slow Qui-Gon made his way to the figure trying to delay the inevitable, it was Obi-Wan. He kneeled next his Padawan; his body looked as if he had stopped dead in his tracks from where he was trying to go after the transports. His lightsabre lay a few feet in front of him, smashed by the impact. Gently Qui-Gon rolled Obi-Wan over, a blaster fire had hit him in the heart. Qui-Gon sat next to Obi-Wan then took him in his arms and cradled him. Hours spend by and sun slowly withdrew behind the horizon.


Tears streamed down his face as he spoke, "I swear I will avenge you Obi-Wan!"

* * *

Yoda sat up in the darkness of his small room, his mind reeling, "Oh no Qui-Gon, oh no."

*

Tahl could feel the black waves washing over her as Qui-Gon entered the transport. She also knew that the dead body in the back of the transport was that of Obi-Wan.

Oh Qui-Gon what have you done? With that last thought Tahl slipped back into unconsciousness.

* * *

They will pay for Obi-Wan. They will pay for the hurt they caused Tahl. They will pay!

Qui-Gon let the dark side into his mind, let it consume his thoughts. He let his thoughts control his actions. He turned the transport back toward the hidden base of the Absolutes. In the storage unit in the back where all the explosives that Qui-Gon could fit and in the second row of the transport laid Qui-Gon?s dearest thing, other than Tahl, that he had had.

They will pay for Obi-Wan. They will pay for the hurt they caused Tahl. They will pay!

 

Ooh this is great Neobi! UP! Poor Obi! Poor Qui!! (Yup it's those word again, the four most overused words in all fan fiction.)

 

Giving this an up before I post more tonight.

 

Cool! Great twist on the JA books.

 

Man I read this the first time and loved it...now this is just getting better and better

More!!

 

Hehe, short little post. If I keep posting like I have been there would be very little left. So short posts!!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Qui-Gon worked quickly and silently. No one disturbed him as he worked, they were all still trying to repair and clean up the mess he had made earlier.

Explosives lined the rim of the water, graced every vehicle inside, threatened the explosive's hanger, and decorated the entrance to the cave. Everyone had been too preoccupied to stop, let alone recognize Qui-Gon.

With a look of sheer satisfaction Qui-Gon walked back to the transport, the detonator in his hand. When they were a safe distance away Qui-Gon pressed the button and through the detonator behind him. He did not look back nor did he slow his speed as he made his way back to the city.

They paid! Vengeance was mine! More will pay though, not enough blood to equal the quality of Obi-Wan's or enough pain to equal Tahl's. Yes, more will pay!

Tahl opened her eyes again and looked over to the man she had loved. Oh Qui-Gon, when did you turn into such a monster? After no more than a minute Tahl let the darkness close around her again.

 

This is wicked.

More?

 

Up, new post will be here tomorrow.

 

Good work Neobi! This is great!

 

Qui-Gon's gone crazy

Man this is great!!!

 

Manex, the short chubby man that had offered his help to Qui-Gon, quickly rushed out of the building. He could see the anger in Qui-Gon?s eyes, the fire that blazed within them. Manex was about to refuse to help now but then he saw Obi-Wan lying limp in the back row of the transport.

"Take her inside; my medical crew will do everything they can." Manex never took his eyes off the young boy?s body.

Why must the young die before we realize our mistakes?

Slowly even reluctantly he turned and went inside to contact the Jedi Council. The holo-communisation system's projection appeared in front of him. It was a Jedi Master that he did not know.

"I am Manex from New Apsolon. We received three Jedi to help us with our situation. The young one called Obi-Wan has died and the one by the name of Tahl is in critical health. The third Qui-Gon Jinn, I feel is no long able to help us. The lose of the other two has taken quiet a toll on him. I request another Jedi be sent to help."

"We know of the death and have already sent another Jedi team to help. We have also sent some to escort the other back. Thank you for contacting us, knowing there are still those who wish this to be resolved is comforting."

Manex thanked the Jedi for her time then switched off the holo-communication. Then he made his way to the med wing.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Sorry it took so long.

 

Too short, Neobi!

More more!

 

If I post them any longer the story will be done. Its not that long of a story.

 

Excellent stuff, Neobi-Kenobi.

 

Sorry, neobi. Didn't mean to rush you. Just a very interesting 'where's it going' story.

 

It's ok, you don't have to be sorry.

 

The news the medic told he was depressing to say the least. Manex told the medic that he would tell Qui-Gon and slowly made his way to the hall where he was waiting.

"How is Tahl recovering?" Qui-Gon asked as soon as he saw Manex.

"The Absolutes gave her what the medics call the lethal injection. The person's organs are already falling and with that shot they decline. Normally it is followed by another injection to quicken the procedure but in Tahl's case you got there before they could. However she will still die."

A jolt of pain ran through Qui-Gon's body as his heart shattered. Tahl had been his love, Obi-Wan his son; now he had neither of them. Soon his grief was replaced by anger. He unclipped his lightsabre, ready to strike down Manex and his medics, but he found his lightsabre was no longer in his hand. A hand was then on his arm.

"I will finish the mission," stated the deep and gentle voice of Mace Windu.

"Home go, you and me," the small Jedi Master said as he walked forward, clipping Qui-Gon's lightsabre to his belt. "Healing process ever long."

 

Well I must fess up that I went and looked through your bio and found the link and read the whole original version of this but I don'
t mind reading it again. It's so beautiful and wonderfully deppressing. Poor Qui-Gon, to lose the two people he loves most.

 

Thank you, I'm happy you liked it.