Beyond - Legends 100 Ways to Leave Your Lecture: Emerald_Lady's Drabbles (Week 20: Jaina Solo)

You just know Zekk so well!!! Great lines:

Sometimes he wonders just what he?d have to barter to command their respect, and if there?d be anything left of him if he did.

If there?s anything Zekk can appreciate right now, it?s trade: the future for the present, and honor for shame.


Great drabbles as always!!!

 

Squee! It's good to see you around the boards again.
I feel loved!

I agree. Jaina?s family relationships haven?t fared very well in canon.
Definitely not. Especially with Jacen going all Sithly.


EYES:

Every day is a battle between exhilaration and fear, freedom and oppression, and he?s keenly aware of the tightrope his life has become.
Very visual.

He just wants to stay upright long enough to make it out of here, and take Peckhum with him.
Aw, sweet boy.

NOSE:
They wrap their disdain around them like a cloak, so he uses his pride as a dagger, piercing them with his gaze until they look away. Sometimes he wonders just what he?d have to barter to command their respect, and if there?d be anything left of him if he did.
This description is amazing.

EARS:
Jaina?s the only reason he?s allowed at all, and he doesn?t delude himself that he?d even be tolerated without her eccentric esteem. He knows that being part of her world is only make-believe, but he can?t bring himself to stop pretending.
I just want to hug the poor boy right now.

THROAT:
Instead he lives with the indelible awareness that his days with Jaina are over, and the fear that it?s only a matter of time until Peckhum?s gone too.


SKIN:
If there?s anything Zekk can appreciate right now, it?s trade: the future for the present, and honor for shame. He has misgivings, but they?re getting overruled by the hope that keeps rising in him at this man?s words.
Great job showing Zekk's feelings, and just how far he'll go to earn respect.


Incredible drabbles- I think this week may be favorite. They're just amazing.

 

JoE:

*flails*

That is about as coherent as I can be about these. Lovely, lovely drabbles. Definitely your best yet.

*flails in response to such praise* Gah! Thank you.

Wow! Beautiful lines.

Thanks!

I love the way this echoes back to the final lines in "Nose"; he wants respect, and he's willing to lose himself for it. Sad but understandable, given his past.

Psychoanalyzing Zekk is so much fun.

I loved this set so much. I think I need to go read The Lost Ones now.

That is a great compliment indeed. The Lost Ones and scruffy!street-kid!Zekk are love.

iamobiwan1970:

You just know Zekk so well!!!

Thank you! That?s always great to hear when one is writing a character.

Great drabbles as always!!!

Thank you! I?m glad you liked them.

ZekksGoddess:

I feel loved!

lol Good.

Definitely not. Especially with Jacen going all Sithly.

Indeed. Tonight on the Holonews at 9??The Star Wars EU: Space Opera or Soap Opera? You Decide.?

Very visual.

Thanks!

Aw, sweet boy.

*huggles her imaginary Zekk plushie*

This description is amazing.

Why thank you.

I just want to hug the poor boy right now.

*sigh* Don?t we all. Except for Jaina, perhaps, but I?m not sure she has much sense sometimes.

Great job showing Zekk's feelings, and just how far he'll go to earn respect.

Thanks! That seems to be one of the defining traits of his character, especially at the beginning of his arc. That, and Zekk angst is one of the best flavors.

Incredible drabbles- I think this week may be favorite. They're just amazing.

Wow! Thank you so much.

 

Week 19: Zekk

---ONE---

He has one recurring dream the week after he leaves Hapes. The dream is wonderful. It?s also much worse than any nightmare could ever be. He had dreams like this after Ennth, and there was no stopping them then either. There?s no defense against a dream that features everyone you've lost, happy and alive and accepting you freely. There?s no defense against the vindictive return of reality, reminding you that they?re all dead or irreparably shattered and never coming back.

Most of all, there?s no defense against knowing that once the redeemer falls, there?s no hope left for the redeemed.

---THREE---

It?s been three weeks now, and he can no longer remember how many planets he?s visited since Hapes. SELCORE always operates at its breaking point, and they have very few Jedi. That means he gets the hard cases, but he doesn?t really mind. Managing defenses for the refugee camps and settling local disputes keeps him from thinking, and while it does dredge up bad memories, at least this time he can be protector rather than victim.

He?s actually making a difference here. Maybe it?s not a big difference, but it?s rewarding and cleansing and it almost lets him forget her.

---FIVE---

Five weeks, and he starts training as a Healer. To his surprise, he?s pretty decent at it. It seems right and fitting that, after doing so much damage, he can mend for a change. He can never make up for his past, but he?ll spend the rest of his life trying. This is as good a place as any to start.

It doesn?t escape his notice that no Healer can touch the most damaging wounds, those of the soul. He weeps for those hurts in others, but he has long since accepted that his own wounds will never fully heal.

---SEVEN---

Seven months later, he?s called back for the knighting ceremony. His achievement is marred by heartbreak and war, but he still counts it as one of his proudest moments. Zekk can hear the respect in Master Skywalker?s voice when he calls him to the stage, and see the look on Peckhum?s face when he realizes his boy is a real Jedi.

Still, he can?t help but remember how things used to be: all of them fighting as one, more powerful together than apart. Now they?re separated and struggling, alone and cut-off. Knighthood seems a hollow victory at such a price.

---NINE---

Nine years later, he and Jaina are un-Joined. They grew closer than he ever thought possible, and yet they?re still light years apart.

He knows now that he?ll never be over her. With luck, his love for her may shift and change, but it?s never going to go away. He?s tried repeatedly to distance himself, knowing that it needed to be done, but nothing has ever worked. Giving up on her would be like giving up on himself, on salvation. He will never stop loving her, and she will never love him back.

Maybe, in the end, that?s his punishment.

 

Eep! More Zekk drabbles!


Except for Jaina, perhaps, but I?m not sure she has much sense sometimes.
Agreed. Resisting Zekk is a very telltale sign.

That, and Zekk angst is one of the best flavors.
Ah, too true!



ONE:
There?s no defense against a dream that features everyone you've lost, happy and alive and accepting you freely. There?s no defense against the vindictive return of reality, reminding you that they?re all dead or irreparably shattered and never coming back.
Most of all, there?s no defense against knowing that once the redeemer falls, there?s no hope left for the redeemed.
Fantastic start.


THREE
That means he gets the hard cases, but he doesn?t really mind. Managing defenses for the refugee camps and settling local disputes keeps him from thinking, and while it does dredge up bad memories, at least this time he can be protector rather than victim.
Ah, Zekk. So noble and selfless.

Maybe it?s not a big difference, but it?s rewarding and cleansing and it almost lets him forget her.
Great line.


FIVE:
Five weeks, and he starts training as a Healer. To his surprise, he?s pretty decent at it. It seems right and fitting that, after doing so much damage, he can mend for a change. He can never make up for his past, but he?ll spend the rest of his life trying. This is as good a place as any to start.
You know, he kind of makes sense as a Healer. I'd never considered it, but it does fit him. Trying to heal the galaxy in retribution for what he had done, for the sake of others. Though he may beed to focus on himself for once...


It doesn?t escape his notice that no Healer can touch the most damaging wounds, those of the soul. He weeps for those hurts in others, but he has long since accepted that his own wounds will never fully heal.
Exactly. Poor Zekk.
We writers do torture him, don't we?


SEVEN:
Zekk can hear the respect in Master Skywalker?s voice when he calls him to the stage, and see the look on Peckhum?s face when he realizes his boy is a real Jedi.
Peckhum!Zekk sweetness!

Knighthood seems a hollow victory at such a price.
That it does.


NINE:
They grew closer than he ever thought possible, and yet they?re still light years apart.


He knows now that he?ll never be over her. With luck, his love for her may shift and change, but it?s never going to go away. He?s tried repeatedly to distance himself, knowing that it needed to be done, but nothing has ever worked. Giving up on her would be like giving up on himself, on salvation. He will never stop loving her, and she will never love him back.
Maybe, in the end, that?s his punishment.
Awesome. So perfectly Zekk.

Fabulous! Your writing is totally blowing me away.

 

Eep! More Zekk drabbles!

I?m starting to think there may be a pattern here.

Agreed. Resisting Zekk is a very telltale sign.

*shakes head in consternation* I worry about that girl sometimes.

Fantastic start.

Thanks.

Ah, Zekk. So noble and selfless.

It?s one of the many reasons we love him.

Great line.

Thank you!

You know, he kind of makes sense as a Healer. I'd never considered it, but it does fit him. Trying to heal the galaxy in retribution for what he had done, for the sake of others. Though he may need to focus on himself for once...

Yeah, I kind of like it too. I?m not the first one to come up with healer!Zekk; I?ve seen it before, though I don?t remember where. It has a nice symmetry to it. He does tend to never think of himself, though, which can be a fault as well as a virtue.

Exactly. Poor Zekk. We writers do torture him, don't we?

It?s fun, though.

Peckhum!Zekk sweetness!

Peckhum needs more love.

Fabulous! Your writing is totally blowing me away.

Aw, thanks. I appreciate the lovely review.

 

Week 20: Jaina Solo

---A LIGHT IN THE DARK---

Jacen?s lost his crystal snake again. Jaina?s vague dreams sublimate into irritated wakefulness as she grabs her robe and stumbles down the moonlit corridor to Jacen?s room, drawn by his panicked exasperation. She finds him on his knees in a darkened corner. He?s so good with animals, but he?s never been able to keep track of them. She clears her throat to speak, and then sees it: a ghostly glimmer half-hidden beneath a pile of dirty flight suits. She points; Jacen coaxes it back into its cage and hugs her. The warmth of his gratitude stays with her until morning.

---STEER BY THE STARS---

She doesn?t know what the point is anymore. She knows the party line?protect the weak, bring peace to the galaxy?but it?s stopped meaning anything. Life and death and love and hate are just concepts that no longer reach her, buried as she is beneath the strata of apathy that are fossilizing her slowly.

She knows he?s coming, but she just keeps staring out the viewport. She can tell by the stars that they?re almost back to Coruscant.

Jacen doesn?t say anything, just sits at the dejarik table. She doesn?t acknowledge him, but she feels a little less alone.

---SHAKE THE HEAVENS---

She finds him at the very edge of the play field, cupping some sort of huge bug in his hands and bending his tousled head over it prayerfully. His troubled eyes swing up to meet hers, and any thought she has of scolding him evaporates.

?Why?d they leave us here, Jaina??

She sits down next to him, close enough that their tunic sleeves are touching. ?I don?t know.?

He frees the bug, and she puts an arm around him. They stay like that until the heavens stop shaking from the fall of their parents, who once ruled there as gods.

---BENEATH THESE HANDS---

The smoothness of his features has been eroded by suffering, like a once-familiar plain after eons under the weight of water, and his altered eyes gaze back at her from the depths. Her throat clenches at the realization that this is her brother, this man who?s been reforged and hardened beneath another?s hands; that she is just as hard, that this is who they are now, casualties of war in their own way.

She wants, so desperately, to find a way to heal him?even if she has to sacrifice her happiness for his. For Jacen, she?d do it anyway.

---THE PATH AND THE WALKER---

They?ve both walked as far down this path as they can, and this is where it ends. When the fight finally comes, there is no thought, just the Force. Nothing else exists until that last still, horrified moment. His eyes widen, and it?s done.

She holds his broken body as it cools, until her good arm fails and she can?t support him anymore.

Before delirium takes her, she feels the twin bond flare in her heart, accompanied by a single luminous thought.

No one you love is ever truly lost.

The warmth of his gratitude stays with her until morning.

 

One of the saddest things in canon, I think, is Jacen and Jaina's broken relationship - they went from being the two closest Jedi ever with their twin bond from birth to being mortal enemies duelling to the death. I was so sad when I read Invincible...

~Jaina

 

Before delirium takes her, she feels the twin bond flare in her heart, accompanied by a single luminous thought.

No one you love is ever truly lost.

The warmth of his gratitude stays with her until morning.

Hands down, my favourite part. Sad but beautiful. It's also nice to think of him acknowledging her with thanks.

 

The Jacen and Jaina relationship absoloutley fascinates me and tears me apart at the same time- I love seeing that relationship explored. So you get bonus points from the get go.

A Light in the Dark:
Filled with trivial sibling annoyances, and all the warmth and friendship that was so true for them. Very appropriate.


Steer by the Stars:
Life and death and love and hate are just concepts that no longer reach her, buried as she is beneath the strata of apathy that are fossilizing her slowly.
Poignant line.

Jacen doesn?t say anything, just sits at the dejarik table. She doesn?t acknowledge him, but she feels a little less alone.
They always did have a way of comforting each other that way, especially throughout YJK.


Shake the Heavens:
I loved this one. Definitely one of my favorites of the set. The emotion and sense of togetherness was absoloutley spot-on and beautifully heartbreaking.

Beneath these Hands:
She wants, so desperately, to find a way to heal him?even if she has to sacrifice her happiness for his. For Jacen, she?d do it anyway.



The Path and the Walker:
Okay, I admit it. You got to me. I cried, okay?

Incredible writing.

 

Congrats on finishing your drabbles!

I can't believe I missed the last Zekk set! My favorite lines:

Most of all, there?s no defense against knowing that once the redeemer falls, there?s no hope left for the redeemed.

Zekk can hear the respect in Master Skywalker?s voice when he calls him to the stage, and see the look on Peckhum?s face when he realizes his boy is a real Jedi.

Giving up on her would be like giving up on himself, on salvation. He will never stop loving her, and she will never love him back.

So perfect.

The Jacen-and-Jaina set was heartbreaking. Really reminded me of the YJK excerpts in Invincible.

 

Jaina_Solo_Goddess: I was really sad too. Denning?s little YJK flashbacks at the beginning of the chapters choked me up a bit.

Solo_and_Fel: Thank you! I?m glad you liked it. I?m not Darth Caedus? biggest fan by any means, but I guess I like to think that there was some small shred of Jacen left in there somewhere.

ZekksGoddess:

The Jacen and Jaina relationship absoloutley fascinates me and tears me apart at the same time- I love seeing that relationship explored. So you get bonus points from the get go.

lol Thank you for the bonus points. I shall put them into my Zekk Anti-Defamation Soceity fund.

Filled with trivial sibling annoyances, and all the warmth and friendship that was so true for them. Very appropriate.

Thanks!

Poignant line.

I was feeling geological.

I loved this one. Definitely one of my favorites of the set. The emotion and sense of togetherness was absoloutley spot-on and beautifully heartbreaking.

I?m glad it worked out. I always thought that the twins would have realized sooner than most kids that their parents weren?t infallible.

Okay, I admit it. You got to me. I cried, okay?

Wow, thank you. I?m sorry to have made you so sad, but on the other hand, that?s quite a compliment.

Incredible writing.

Thanks so much for your reviews and support!

jedi_of_ennth:

Congrats on finishing your drabbles!

lol Thanks! It only took me almost a year and a half.

I can't believe I missed the last Zekk set! My favorite lines:

Most of all, there?s no defense against knowing that once the redeemer falls, there?s no hope left for the redeemed.

Zekk can hear the respect in Master Skywalker?s voice when he calls him to the stage, and see the look on Peckhum?s face when he realizes his boy is a real Jedi.

Giving up on her would be like giving up on himself, on salvation. He will never stop loving her, and she will never love him back.

So perfect.

Aww, thanks! And thanks so much for all the reviews and encouragement and such.

The Jacen-and-Jaina set was heartbreaking. Really reminded me of the YJK excerpts in Invincible.

lol Probably because they?re what jump started my muse to write these.