2001-02 JC FORUMS HUMOR AWARDS!

*walks onstage in a full baby blue tux and taps the mic*

I'll give everyone a few minutes to get in and announce their escorts, bodyguards, ect.!

*is really stalling for time because his cohost has not yet arrived*

Welcome folks- to the first annual JC Forum Humor awards! Please come in and take your seats at any clique-y table available!

 

*runs onstage, wearing a long, flowing black dress, diamond jewelry, and hair in a twist bun* Hello, Pete!

*turns to audience* Yes, folks, we have quite a show tonight! Gear up for some surprises, shocks, twists, and turns as we announce the funniest pieces of fan fiction this year! Expect some cameos from well-known faces, as well.

Let the party begin!

 

*swirls in on the arm of the most devilishly handsome man in the room*

Hello, everyone!

*sighs of envy greet her arrival and heads turn as she walks down the aisle*

*her friends and co-writers at the Skywalkers/Solos table whistle appreciatively*

*she and Square Blankey sit down*

*Square Blankey is resplendent as always, with his dirty blue cloth cleaned for the occasion, and only one bleach spot from this most recent washing*

*Em is stunning: her hair is twisted intricately on top of her head, with the tiniest swirling curls dangling down to brush her cheeks. Her dress is strapless and simple, making her body look long and slender-- an effect she doubts is realistic, but is certainly satisfying. Simple glowing gems accent her ears, neck, and wrists, and delicate sandals grace her feet*

*Square Blankey pulls her chair out for her and she settles down and pulls Square Blankey onto her lap, cuddling with him and waiting for things to start*

 

Well I don't have to stall for time, but I still have a joke I can use...

*turns to Fruits*

Ready for some witty banter?

*fruits nods*

How could Vader always tell what Luke got him for father's day?

Give up fruity?

*waggles his eyebrows*

 

Ooo! I know this!!!

"He felt his presents."

 

An A-wing zips into a parking lot outside. A man exits the cockpit, entering the room. He wears Sith robes, and his hood shadows most of his head. Beneath the hood, his eyes are obscured by a pair of sunglasses.

Darth_Tim, renegade Sith Lord, takes his seat.

-Tim

 

*lights flash, cameras whirl*

Good Evening, my dears. What a big occasion, just be glad that I brought along another source of entertainment

*reveals Anakin and Obi-Wan trudging behind her, dressed in tuxedos with just the hint of cologne*

One of these days I owe Padme one. Now, lemme just find my seat and wait for the glamorous proceedings. This is so exciting, similar to the Golden Globes, only with reserved madness. Oh, let the fun begin!

Am

 

**Enters. Is wearing a Jedi Robes that are several shades and hues of blue, and arm and arm with the lovely Tahiri Veila (Naturally! Where does Anakin Solo go without Tahiri?). Isn't nominated for anything (no one loves me ) so takes his seat in the spectator section.**

 

*frowns*

Ok, so you know more corny jokes than I do...

If I were Vader, I would have strangled you for less....

 

*watches as everyone takes their seats*

I guess that we'll still have to wait for the fashionably late...

*shakes his head*

Some people just have to make an entrance....

Anyways, in writing, especially humor, a whole story, the whole crux of it, relies on one scene. Sometimes humor builds and builds to this climactic, humorous and "Oh God, I know what's coming next" point. Usually, these bubbling pots then overflow with humor! To recognize the efforts of these special scenes, we have here the nominees for Best Humorous Scene -

Anakin and Obi-Wan dressing in Padme's dresses in Me, my Padawan, his girlfriend, and a bunch of handmaidens by Am and Mar17swgirl

The bank robbery from Mara Jade: Marriage Aid by PeterTutham27

The Congo scene from A Year With the Skywalker Solos by Marawannabe

Anakin?s whistling scene in Catch by Tahiri

The Opera scene of Vacation with the S/S by Melyanna.

The scene from A Year with the Skywalker/Solos when Anakin reads Star by Star to Ben

"Gossiping With the Enemy" (the Rouge Squadron saves Admiral Daala from a cosmetic emergency), in Blindman's Short Attention Span Theater Presents.

The scene from: Me, My Padawan, his G/F, & a bunch of Handmaidens where Rabe is trying to seduce Obi Wan. by Am and Mar

The chipmunk melting scene in Attack of the Chipmunks by Jacinta Kenobi

Anakin mooning Bail Organa in The Anakin Skywalker Diaries by anakin_girl

The scene from "A Day in the Life of Emperor Palpatine" by Gandolf the Grey, wherein Palpatine discovers the planet Qnbovsehtose on the galactic map--and has it destroyed because he can't pronounce it...

There are the nominees! I will now allow a short amount of time for nominees to post this humorous scene that has earned them their nominations! Ladies and gentlemen, focus your attention to the giant IMAX screens as we give you- the BEST HUMOR SCENES OF 2001-02!

*lights dim and the film rolls*

 

**Watches the scenes, laughs uncontrolably and applauds respectfully**

 

*the screens change to show an office building, and a fiery haired woman. The Scene from Peter Tutham's "Mara Jade: Marriage Aid" begins to play out...*

Her morning took a bit of an up-turn however, with the presentation of her first
paycheck.

"What?s this?" she growled, when her Boss, Larry dropped the check on her desk.

"It?s a paycheck. A piece of paper telling you how much money you made..." he
said cautiously.

"Paper? Paper is no good, I need something more real...." Her eyes narrowed.
"Money! NOW~!"

Larry yelped, and quickly emptied his pockets, giving her his wallet, credit cards
and the company payroll...

"What? Is that it?" Mara asked, when he was finished.

"Um... yes..?" Larry managed.

"Yes? Then go! Go little boy! Go!"

Larry flew out of there like a stormtrooper who realized that he forgot to bring
Vader his rubber ducky for his daily bath.

Merv, Mara?s assistant walked in, stealing glances out the door as he did so.

"Why was Larry crying?" he asked, as he put her daily letters on her desk. He
then made eye contact with Mara and realized why.

"I-I mean.. uh.. I?m so sorry to interrupt you.. but I- ..." he stammered. "I?ll be in
my cubicle if you need me..."

Mara ripped open a letter. She was not in the mood for listening to idiots babble,
but in the mood to yell at someone, and there just happened to be an entire pile
of scapegoats in front of her.

"For the fellow female in the fight for freedom from filthy flops of freaks for
husbands,
I quietly quip a query; quite the queer question. My married man moans morbidly
mostly Mondays, "My money?s missing. Mama mia! Mislaid monitonal mounds
menace me! My miserable misfortune!"
Clearly, Clarence cleaved the clink clean closed, that clever clod! Pointless
purchases persuade prementioned persona to pinch pennies, plucking pleasure
presently past my peepers. Simply said, shopping is suicide! I?m so short supplied
in savings, silver simply doesn?t survive a surplus of seconds! I?m so screwed!
Help a hysterical human in her hindrance!
-Doesn?t Divulge Dimes!"

Perfect... Mara thought. Just the thing to help with my headache.

"Pertaining to Penny Problems,
Clamp Clarence?s clearance! Allow an allotted amount! Stop spending
superfluously! Maintain money manageably, moron! Beat bills boldly by budgeting
and by bashing the boy?s brains!

-Mara, Money Mistress. "

Speaking of money...

Mara looked down at her desk and her newly acquired wealth.

"I guess I?ll open an account downtown," she said to herself.

Not asking for permission, Mara strode from the office, past corridors of quivering
co-workers.

Soon, she was at the First National Bank. She saw the lines of people and
frowned. She scratched her head as she tried to think of a solution. Then,
inspiration hit her like a TIE fighter in an asteroid belt.

"Oh my GOSH!" she yelled, jumping up and down, and pointing frantically

 

Because he is out of town, I will post the scene "Gossiping with the Enemy" on behalf of BlindMan.

*****

Short Attention Span Theater Presents...

GOSSIPING WITH THE ENEMY


(In a towering Imperial fortress, Admiral Daala sits in her quarters, absently studying a tactical display. A chime comes from the doorway.)

DAALA: Enter!

(The door hisses open, and two soldiers enter.)

SOLDIER #1: Admiral, a group of stormtroopers has arrived at the base, and requests an audience.

DAALA: Indeed? I assume their authorization codes checked out?

SOLDIER #1: Of course. But--

DAALA: Yes?

SOLDIER #1: Sir, they used the Delta Omega Five code.

DAALA: (eyes widening a bit) Did they really? Show them in.

SOLDIER #1: Sir, forgive my curiosity, but isn't Delta Omega Five for top priority assignments?

(DAALA simply stares at him. After a moment, he humbly nods, then turns to SOLDIER #2, waving him toward the doorway. SOLDIER #2 departs, then returns a moment later, leading six stormtroopers into the room.)

DAALA: (to SOLDIER #1 and #2) You may leave us.

(The soldiers nod, and depart. The door closes behind them. For a moment, DAALA simply stares at the stormtroopers, thrumming her fingers against the arm of her chair.)

DAALA: I could be killed for this, you know. My own men would shoot me. But you're my only hope.

(The stormtroopers take off their helmets, revealing WEDGE, TYCHO, HOBBIE, JANSON, CORRAN and GAVIN.)

WEDGE: Honey, discretion is Rouge Squadron's middle name. Now, what's the problem?

DAALA: I have to go to Moff Borlan's party. One of those stupid "meet and greet" deals, as we try to secure a new alliance with a neighboring system. I don't want to go, but if I have to, I'll be damned if I let Borlan's little hussy of a wife look better than me!

WEDGE: Just leave it to us, sister. (he turns to the Rouges) Damage assessment! Stat!

(The Rouges swarm over DAALA, checking fingernails, toenails, skin tone. JANSON examines her hair.)

JANSON: Lovely, simply lovely. Do you use a cream rinse?

DAALA: Every day.

JANSON: Hand dry or blow dry?

DAALA: Hand dry, of course.

JANSON: (to WEDGE) I think I love this woman.

CORRAN: (examining DAALA's right hand) We've got a hangnail! Code Red! Code Red!

(HOBBIE hands CORRAN a pair of tweezers. CORRAN frowns at them, hands them back.)

CORRAN: Damn it, I need #3 tweezers! Those are #2!

HOBBIE: Sorry, sorry!

(He hands over the correct tweezers, and CORRAN sets to work. WEDGE, meanwhile, begins to apply makeup.)

WEDGE: So...how's every little thing? I heard you'd retired, or something.

DAALA: Wherever did you hear such nonsense?

WEDGE: Oh, you know how people talk.

DAALA: Yeah, I do. You know, I'm kind of surprised you guys agreed to come out here. I mean, us being on opposite sides, and all.

WEDGE: Honey, good looks don't recognize *any* boundaries. Let everyone else fight their silly little wars; we'll spend our time making the galaxy look beautiful. Right, guys?

JANSON, TYCHO, HOBBIE, CORRAN and GAVIN: (in unison) Right!

(Twenty minutes later, DAALA's hair is up in curlers, as the Rouges continue their work...)

DAALA: --and so I was all, like, "Sun Crusher"? What a stupid name! We are *not* calling it that!

JANSON: Preach on, sister.

CORRAN: Okay, Daala, before Gavin and I can start painting these nails, we've got to see what you're going to be wearing, so we can color coordinate.

DAALA: My dress is over in the wardrobe, there. (she gestures) The green one.

(CORRAN walks over, opens the wardrobe and lifts out the green dress.)

CORRAN: Oh. My. God. I think I'm going to pee my pants, this is so beautiful. (he turns toward the other Rouges, holding up the dress) Is this not faboo?

TYCHO: *Totally* faboo.

JANSON: (to WEDGE) I am going to marry this woman.

GAVIN: What do you think, Corran? Emerald Gloss #5 for the nails?

CORRAN: Definitely.

(With obvious reluctance, CORRAN puts the dress away. GAVIN walks over and rumm

 

My Master, Melyanna, is also not present, so I have been authorized by the hosts to post her scene for her. This is the opera scene from A Vacation with the Skywalkers/Solos by Melyanna.


*~*~*~*

"So, sweetheart, what's this show we're going to see?" Han asked as Leia adjusted the bowtie she had forced around his neck.

"Le Nozze di Figaro."

"The knots of what?"

"No, Le Nozze di Figaro, Han."

"That's not in Basic," he complained.

"No, it's not. It's an opera in Italian."

"Will I be able to understand any of it?"

"Of course you will."

*~*~*~*

"Voi, che sapete che cosa è amor..."

"Leia," Han whispered, leaning over in his seat in the Tryon Festival Theatre, "I can't understand a word of this garbage."

"Donne, vedete s'io l'ho nel cor!"

"Han, it's not garbage," she bit back. "It's Mozart. And if you'd pay attention you'd pick up on the plot through their body language."

"Quello ch'io provo, vi ridirò,"

"Wait a minute," Han whispered as Vader and Padmé tried to contain their laughter. They obviously found something amusing.

"È per me nuovo, capir nol so."

"What?" Leia whispered back in irritation.

"Sento un affetto pien di desir,"

"Wasn't she a man a minute ago?"

"Ch'ora è diletto, ch'ora e martir."

"Honestly, Han, can't you pay attention?"

"Gelo, e poi sento l'ama avvampar,"

"Well, was she or wasn't she?"

"E in un momento torno a gelar."

"Can you two shut up?" a man seated in front of them demanded.

"Ricerco un bene fuori di me,"

"I'm terribly sorry, sir," Leia replied diplomatically. "My husband is being an idiot."

"Non so chi il tiene, non so cos'è."

"Hey!"

"Sospiro e gemo senza voler,"

"Well, it's true."

"Palpito e tremo senza saper,"

Han sighed. "So was she or was she not a man a minute ago?"

"Non trovo pace notte nè di,"

"If you'd paid attention at all, you'd know."

"Ma pur mi piace languir così!"

"Leia, I came along to humor you, not because I wanted to."

"Voi, che sapete che cosa è amor,"

"Oh, fine. Susanna and the Countess just dressed Cherubino up as a handmaiden to hide him from the Count. Cherubino is madly in love with the Countess, and he's lamenting the fact that he loves without being requited."

"Donne, vedete s'io l'ho nel cor,"

"But the person playing Cheru-what's-his-name is a woman?"

"Donne, vedete s'io l'ho nel cor!"

"Yes."

Han's head hit the back of his seat as the orchestra finished the scene. "I need a drink."

*~*~*~*

 

(This section was written by Mar)

**

Rule Eight - Under any circumstances, never let your boredom drive you insane or make you do things your dignity wouldn't normally let you.

**

"Master," Anakin's voice stirred Obi-Wan's half-sleep. "I'm bored."

"I know Anakin," he replied, rubbing his eyes. "You mentioned that for the twenty-third time in the past hour."

Anakin yawned and stood up. "I need to do something."

Obi-Wan shrugged and closed his eyes again. "As long as you don't break anything or make any mess, I don't care."

Even with his eyes closed, he could sense Anakin grin widely and start exploring the room.

I just hope that he won't get any insane ideas...

"MASTER!"

Too late. "What, Anakin?" he asked, not daring to open his eyes.

"Um, never mind... hold on a second and don't open your eyes yet!" Anakin continued, his voice full of excitement.

Obi-Wan just murmured something about immature teenage Padawans, but complied with Anakin's wish. He could hear a quiet rustle of clothes, but didn't pay any attention to it. Instead, he tried to get at least a bit of sleep. But before he managed to slip into unconsciousness, Anakin's voice stirred him once again.

"TA-DAAA!"

Obi-Wan lazily opened one eye, but what he saw, snapped his eyes wide open. He abruptly sat up and his jaw dropped.

"Holy Sithspawn, Anakin!" he gasped. "What on Coruscant is that?"

Anakin giggled, a large grin spreading across his face. He was dressed in a loose dark blue dress - Padme's dress, as Obi-Wan noticed - with a rather deep neckline. Obi-Wan blinked several times, hoping that that was just a bad dream, before speaking up.

"Force, Anakin, what do you think you're doing? Put that dress down at once and stop acting like... like..." he desperately searched for a word.

Anakin laughed. "Come on, Master, it's fun!"

"Fun...?" he echoed, unable to say more.

Anakin nodded fervently. "Just sit down, I will do a little... uh... show for you."

Obi-Wan wordlessly slumped back into his chair, and Anakin disappeared behind the door of the changing room. A few minutes later, he came out, wearing a tight-fitting black dress, with a black shawl wrapped around his neck, black gloves up to his elbows, and a silver tiara across his forehead. He stood before Obi-Wan, grinning widely.

Obi-Wan stared at him, his eyebrows raised, not sure whether he wanted to laugh or cry. But Anakin's grimaces and the way he "presented" himself was too much for him. He buried his face in his hands and started laughing desperately.

"Anakin..." he managed to get out, gasping for breath, "one day you're gonna be the death of me."

Anakin joined him in laughter and returned to the changing room.

"Wait until you see this!" He announced, his voice muffled from behind the door.

Obi-Wan ran his hand through his hair. Oh Force, what is he going to do now?" he wondered silently. The answer came soon.

This time, Anakin appeared in Padme's senatorial robe - blue-purple dress and a long, dark purple-black gown. The hairpiece on his head was extremely odd-looking, since it lacked Padme's long thick hair that it was usually stuffed with. On Anakin's head it looked like a very unstable decorated skeleton in the shape of the hairpiece.

Obi-Wan snorted and burst into a roaring laughter, holding his abdomen.

"Oh my... Anakin..." he gasped out, wiping the tears out of his eyes, before breaking into another outburst.

Anakin made a straight face. "It's been a long time, Master Kenobi," he said in his best imitation of Padme's voice.

"Stop, please, stop..." Obi-Wan begged, unable to breathe.

Anakin cracked up, and shook his head, sending the hairpiece flying across the room. This caused another outburst of laughter from both of them. Anakin picked up the hairpiece and glanced at Obi-Wan.

"Wanna try it?" he asked, winking.

"What?" Obi-Wan's jaw dropped in horror.

Anakin straighten himself and grabbed Obi-Wan's hand. "Come on, it's fun! Yo

 

This post written by Tahiri



Anakin was still reading Star by Star to Ben. Ben was on the other side of the room, intently watching Batman on TV.

"Are you listening?" Anakin demanded of his cousin.

"Ya..." Ben said, not even blinking at the TV as he spoke. "Read!"

"I'll read to you later, when you're not watching TV, okay?" Anakin tried to use his best gentle voice. He just didn't want to be there right now. He stood and started to leave.

"NO!"

And all of a sudden, he found himself plastered to the ceiling.

"Down, Ben!"

"READ!" The book was floated up to him.

"Oh, fine, fine," Anakin snapped, flipping through the book again. The part they were at disturbed Anakin. It made him wonder.... "'Nom Anor rushed for the detonator again. Anakin waited, waited until the executor was almost on it, then reached out with the Force one last time, rolling the sphere toward the cargo pod. He did not hear the angry curse that followed, nor did he see Nom Anor fleeing at a dead run. By then, Anakin was gone.'"

Anakin nearly lost his grip on the book.

"'Nikin dead!" Ben cried out gleefully, clapping his hands together. Anakin fell to the floor, not even using the Force to cushion his fall. He landed on his back and groaned.

"Ow! Ben, stop doing that!"

"Dead!"

Anakin shivered. He considered calling for his mom or dad, but he knew they wouldn't come if they knew he was all right. So he settled for the faster approach: "AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

There was a complete silence, but Anakin felt rather than heard the rumbling of the floors. From all sides, doors opened, windows flew up, and heads peeked in.

"What did you do now, Ben?"

"*snort* Infidel cowards, screaming because of the mere child...."

"Grandson of Vader!"

"Not him, too! Spare my son!"

"'Sup, lil' brotha?"

Suddenly a booming voice silenced them. "What is wrong, child?"

Anakin smiled a little at his grandfather Vader. They had a close connection, with Anakin being his namesake and all.

"They killed me, Grandpa," Anakin said, hefting the big book. "They cut me up from the inside."

"Downtouch," Yoda said from somewhere behind Count Dooku and Palpatine.

Everyone stared at Yoda. He laughed. "He he ha ha hmmmmmm...."

Obi-Wan placed his hand on Yoda's head and turned him around, pushing him gently away from the room.

"Hmmm? Not want me here, do you?" Yoda asked everyone.

Everyone hastily shook their heads.

Yoda laughed again. "He he ha ha hmmmm..." He quieted down, but everyone still stared at him, expecting him to say something else or leave. He didn't. After a few minutes, they turned back to Anakin.

"What do you mean, they cut you up from the inside?" Vader asked, his voice growing threatening.

"I got internal bleeding," Anakin said, pointing at the book feebly. "And I WAS GONE!!!!"

Vader hastily grabbed the book from his grandson's hands, and flipped to the page Anakin told him to go to. Everyone stood watching, to see if Anakin's fears were true.

Vader stood still for a moment, then said, "Angel?"

"Yes, dear?" she asked, coming up beside him.

He handed the book to her. "Outloud, please. You know I cannot see very well through this blasted helmet of mine."

"Yes, dear," Padme said. "'Nom Anor rushed for the detonator again. Anakin waited, waited until the executor was almost on it, then reached out with the Force one last time, rolling the sphere toward the cargo pod. He did not hear the angry curse that followed, nor did he see Nom Anor fleeing at a dead run. By then, Anakin was gone.'"

Everyone stood still in shock. "See?" Anakin asked tearfully. Padme flipped towards the end, checking pages as she went along. She sniffled as she did so.

"Well," she said, her voice thick, as she bent forward in front of Anakin and held his arms. "It's not that bad, sweetie, Jaina went back for your body, and...."

"'Nikin dead!" Ben exclaimed. "Nommy Nor killed Niki!"

Nom Anor suddenly felt threated as every eye turned to him. H

 

*claps as the images wear down*

Yes, those are great scenes! Many a soft drink has been snorted through the nose due to those scenes...

Fruity, the envelope?

*takes it from her*

Our first JC Forum Humor award for Best Humorous Scene goes to-

*mega-drumroll*

Amidala_Skywalker and Mar17swgirl for the dress scene in MMPHGAABOH!

Congrats!

 

*applauds* Woo hoo! Yay Am and Mar! You two deserved it!

 

*claps as soon as he can stop laughing at the memory of the side-splitting scenes*

 

*Stylishly makes her way on stage, her angelic white dress as buoyant as ever, while muttering small whispers to herself*

Am: Ahem, Ahem. I hereby accept this award in the name of ?

*Mar suddenly pops out from behind the curtains, a bright grin covering her features*

Mar: Jerdin!

Am (groans): No, not this again

Mar: Don?t make me get out the thwacking stick, Master

Am: Why must I always be cursed with demons?

Mar: Uh, because your of the Darkside

Am: Well, thank you for pointing out the obvious. Here we standing out in front of all these people and your quoting me the rules of the sith.

Mar: Hey ? it?s my job!

Am: It better become a hobby, otherwise we?ll win nothing next year. Do you really want them to throw rotten fruit at you?

Mar (sarcastically): Eww, I?m so squeamish

Am: That it! Next week I?m subjecting you to Barney tapes

Mar: Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words shall NEVER hurt me

Am: What about seeing him live in concert? You?ll never survive that?

Mar (in terror): Nooooo!

Am (grins evilly): With that said, I hereby accept this great honour in the name of the troublesome twosome, who are yet to turn the boards into insanity. We thank you and will cherish this!

Mar: I?m telling you Master, it would have been better if I accepted it

Am: Oh, isn?t enough you were late?

Mar (whimpers): But---Jerdin?

Am (smirks): I bought Obi.

Mar: What? Obi-Wan Kenobi, here to rescue me?

Am (frowns): Somehow, I don?t think so?

**

Seriously, I never expected to win this award. I'm just speechless. Thank you so much much Mar *hugs and high-fives*

Am

 

Yes, let's have another hand for Am and Mar for that lovely scene!

*the crowd hoots*

And now, our next category is pretty straightforward.

Somtimes brevity is the soul of wit, and some lines just hit you from nowhere, making that fic oh so much better. Sometimes one line can sum up a fic, or just be a passing reference that still makes for a good laugh! In any case, a cornerstone of humor is that one humorous line.

The nominees for Best Humorous Line are-

(SW character walk across stage and read the line off)

"MY ROSES!!!" - Vader, in any random Skywalkers/Solos story- Darth Fruitcake

From Blindman's Vader Monologues:
"Anakin: Well, we're just Mr. Bitter today, aren't we?
Vader: We're Mr. Bitter every day."

In the fic The Day In The Life Of Mara Jade by Qwi_Xux "5:28 A.M: Pull my Blaster on the store owner."

"Gwampa made a downtouch!" A Year with the Skywalker/Solos.

"Allow me to introduce... Annakin, Anikin, Annikin, Anakan and Billy."
From "Attack of the Klones," in Blindman's Short Attention Span Theater Presents.

"Do you want fries with that?"-Vader in Best Served Cold by PeterTutham27

"Is-AHH! Is- 'How come you can't love me cuz I'm your stalker?'!" Peter Tutham -A year with the S/S

"One little, two little, three little banthas, four little, five little, six little banthas..." - 'A Day in the Life of Han Solo'

The Anakin Skywalker Diaries by anakin_girl
Padme: "He needed mooning?"
Anakin: "Yes, he did. Come on, babe, you saw the way he was looking at you. He wanted a piece of a$$. So I gave him one."

These are your nominees for best lines! Unfortunately, I'm not creative enough to say a short witty comment right now, so I'll leave that to Fruity!

 

The winner of the best line is-

*envelope opens and Peter screams*

AH!!!!!!!!!! A PAPER CUT~!!!!!!


*sucks finger*

I mean uh-

"MY ROSES!!!" - Vader, in any random Skywalkers/Solos story- Darth Fruitcake and Co.

*big applause!!!!*

 

Congrats, Am and Mar! And all of us weird S/S folks . . .

 

YES!!!

*accepts award from Pete and kisses his cheek*

Wow.... this is a shocker.

Vader is probably the most prominent character in my series, what with his three loves being Padme, roses, and his family of psychotic goons. I am proud to say that one of these loves is honored today in a simple phrase: "MY ROSES!!!"

Thank you all!

 

*crowd goes *awwww**