30 Harshest Filmmaker-on-Filmmaker Insults in History: 30. Uwe Boll on Michael Bay:

i insult shyamalan on a regular basis so i'm feeling especially close to cronenberg right now. is he married?

edit: re werner - he probably just doesn't know him. it's not really his style to tear someone else down.

edit edit: nevermind, he has to know him. he's probably just tired of having to field questions about his version of bl.

 

As if you need a reason to hate M. Night Shymalan these days. It's just a thing you do these days - eat, sleep, drink, hate Shymalan.

 

Shyamalan hasn't helped his cause by being a conceited, self-absorbed artiste that can't take criticism.

 

28. Alan Parker on Peter Greenaway (specifically The Draughtsman?s Contact):

?A load of posturing poo-poo.?

 

i understand where he's coming from, but i don't agree. that film is PURE ENTERTAINMENT to me.

 

29. Ken Russell on Sir Richard Attenborough:

?Sir Richard (?I?m-going-to-attack-the-Establishment-fifty-years-after-it?s-dead?) Attenborough is guilty of caricature, a sense of righteous self-satisfaction, and repetition which all undermine the impact of the film.?

I don't like Russell, but this is dead on.

 

only seen gandhi, so me no know.

 

Probably an accurate sentiment, but he twice played an old guy who genetically engineered dinosaurs in movies that came out when I was four. That's like trying to hate on your grandpa.

Uh, the cool grandpa. Not the racist one.

 

Dickie is a legend, although I prefer his brother. He is a fine actor but I haven't seen any of his movies.

 

30. Uwe Boll on Michael Bay:

?I?m not a ******* retard like Michael Bay.?

No; you are an unsuccessful ******* retard.

 

Wow, just reading the subject line made my mind go on overload with all kinds of sarcastic
obnoxious thoughts.

You can say a lot of things about Michael Bay's rather obvious lack of artistic pretensions,
and talent. But Mr. Uwe Boll, Bay does know how to entertain and draw a crowd. Now a lot
of those people may not be real picky about their movies, but Bay's movies are at least
commercial and they do serve their intended audience, the audience that wants action.

I can't wait to read the other responses to this.

 

When asked for his comments on this insult, Roger Ebert began laughing uncontrollably.







This happened in spite of the fact that he no longer has any vocal chords.

 

Yeah, no kidding. I suppose everyone is in the same boat, as I don't think any language on Earth has the words that capture what a hypocritical statement that was from Boll. Maybe, just maybe, once humankind reaches the stars, we'll discover an advanced alien civilization that has a language adequate enough to describe the sheer stupidity of Boll's comment.

But if the alien civilization was that advanced, at first viewing of any of Boll's movies, they would probably disintegrate the entire planet out of rational self-survival.... and really, who would blame them?

 

My brother and I agree that this statement is worthy of sainthood. Or at least a free Orange Julius.

 

Or at least a free Orange Julius.

I could really go for a free Orange Julius too! Maybe a mango Julius in a pinch.


At least before the Earth is disintegrated...


"I don't see you making a movie! BloodRayne is better than Underworld because it has more blood and sex! You said something bad about my movie, so I want to punch you in a boxing ring since I'm a boxer! Unless you have any boxing experience, in which case, no dice!"

Heh...imagine if Tunnel Rats went up against BloodRayne in a boxing ring. No matter which film wins, the audience looses...(shudder)

 

I think Uwe Boll is just jealous that Michael Bay is capable of making fils that are actually watchable.

 

Probably. Michael Bay is empty calories, but at least enjoyable at the time.

 

This. Bay has a love of the sugary part of filmmaking-explosions, big scores, silly romances, all that, and it shows. Sometimes he can be surprisingly good-The Rock is a great movie, for example. Most times he isn't very good, but he very obviously loves making movies and that comes through in his films. It's hard not to respond to such enthusiasm, at least for me.

Boll, OTOH, is a hack who exploits tax code loopholes to make money.

 

Armageddon also comes to mind.

Agreed. Pearl Harbor wasn't particularly good, but for the most part when you watch a Michael Bay movie, you know that you're in for a fun ride.

 

Agreed. Sometimes his cheesy sentimentality actually works really, really well-pretty sure I wasn't the only audience member who felt awful when Bumblebee got his legs blown off in the first Transformers and was trying to crawl towards the enemy. It was like seeing a puppy get hit by a bus still being alive.

 

...Really? That's usually cited as his first truly awful film.

 

Ehhh...not really, I thought. There's alot of fun to be had in the movie. Sure, the ending is pure cheese, but the Russian guy, the competent f/x, Steve Buscemi, and Michael Clarke-Duncan were highlights. The movie was ridiculously commercial, sure, but I'd bet that's more the studio's fault than Bay's.

 

Exactly. I will be the first to admit that its not even remotely scientifically accurate, but its a great popcorn movie.