Saga "A Boy Named Luke" [Parody of 'A Boy Named Sue'] [UPDATED!!! -- ADDED ROTJ VERSE!] Thanks, all!!

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by ShrunkenJedi, Jul 4, 2009.

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  1. ShrunkenJedi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 26, 2003
    star 5
    ***NOTE: UPDATED WITH ESB *AND* ROTJ VERSIONS BELOW!***

    Haven't been around at all for quite a while, but I was inspired by a thread in SW Community about what music Vader would listen to. Johnny Cash was suggested, which made me think of 'A Boy Named Sue' and how it could be adapted for Luke... Yes, this is only ep. IV, my original idea was to do the whole OT but it didn't quite work out like that. Maybe some other time.

    "A Boy Named Luke", or the Ballad of Luke and Vader
    [Adapted from Johnny Cash's 'A Boy Named Sue']


    -I-

    Never known my dad, though my Aunt tells me
    He was the best darn pilot that they ever did see
    From the Inner Core all the way to the Outer Rim.
    Now, I don't blame him cause he gone and died
    But the guy who did it better run and hide
    Before he's done, that man will hear from a boy named Luke

    His name is Vader and he used to be
    Another Jedi apprentice to Ben Ke-no-bi,
    Along with my dad, whose name was Anakin.
    Don't know what happened but when I catch up
    To the guy who killed him, sure enough,
    Before he's done, that man will hear from a boy named Luke

    Well, I grew up quick and I grew up lean,
    On the boondoggle planet known as Tatooine,
    I'd race my friends from dusk to dawn for fun.
    But I made a vow to the moon and stars
    That I'd be a Skywalker, not a Lars
    And leave this planet afore I go insane.

    Well, my Aunt and Uncle were kinda fried
    And I was pretty glad just to be alive,
    So I went with Ben to go to help this girl.
    At an old Cantina in a seedy town,
    We met a pilot, outward bound
    and left that crazy planet far from view

    But soon enough, we saw the strangest sight
    And we all could tell something wasn't right,
    A planet missing, and a moon that ain't no moon.
    As it pulled us in we tried to flee,
    So we hid real well, Ben, Han and me,
    And we called: "We're Stormies too! How do you do!"
    Now let's say bye-bye!!

    Well, Ben slipped off to free the ship
    And from our 'bot, came a screech an' blip,
    Alerted me that the girl we wanted was near.
    She was scheduled to be executed and
    The pilot fin'ly give me a hand to help her and
    We shot and fought and with her help we got her out.

    I'd tell ya, I've seen tougher chicks
    But even out there in the sticks,
    I ain't seen nothing like the way she chewed Han out.
    She gave him lip and then I heard him cuss,
    He went for his gun but she took it first,
    And she shot like a pro and we fin'ly got away.

    But before we left a sight I saw
    Old Ben was fighting with a man, with a plastic jaw
    All in black and he hadn't got a chance in the world.
    Well, he winked at me as he said goodbye
    And though I knew the risk I yelled a cry
    And that was Vader who mowed his teacher down.

    We sped off into the dead of night with the
    Plans that would serve that space station right
    Darn tricky maneuvers, but ones I sure could do.
    But I really want to, before I die,
    Find that Vader and when we joust and vie
    Make sure he knows he's downed by a boy named Luke

    I started in as I prepared my run
    But Vader got on my tail, and I thought I was done,
    But Han with the Falcon came into my view.
    And he took 'im out, I was clear,
    And away I went with a great big cheer,
    And if that guy's alive, I think I'm gonna give him

    ...A piece of my mind! Forget the Jedi Way! I still hate that man!

    -II-

    We all moved out to an iceball hell
    That didn't suit the needs of anyone well
    Just a way to hide and keep the eyes from the Rebel troops.
    Now, I was checking out a sensor hit
    When this angry creature came and threw a fit
    And before I knew it I was hangin' from the doggone roof

    Well, when I freed myself from that beastly cave
    I felt kinda faint and I began to rave,
    I saw a vision of Ben tryin' to talk to me.
    Told me to find this Jedi named Yoda
    On a swamped-over planet that he called Dagobah,
    And Vader would one day know 'bout a boy called Luke.

    Well, I helped hold back Imperial troops,
    Got 'em real good and I turned to regroup,
    But instead I aimed for the planet Ben had named.
    And I found that runt and he taught me true
    But one day it hit me, I si
  2. Sara_Kenobi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 21, 2000
    star 7
    That was fantastic! :p =D= I loved it from start to finish. =D= A wonderful spin on one of my all time favorites.
  3. madman007 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Aug 22, 2007
    star 4
    Very funny. And fitting that the Star Wars "Man In Black" would listen to our "Man In Black". :cool:
  4. ShrunkenJedi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 26, 2003
    star 5
    Sara, madman: Thank you! So glad you enjoyed it, especially that I could please a fan of the song, Sara ;) And yes, it is rather fitting that the 'Man in Black' would listen to the 'Man in Black' from our world-- as I said, I got the idea from the 'what would Vader listen to on his iPod' thread in SW Community. If that wasn't what you were already referring to. :p

    Updated with a verse for Empire Strikes Back! Will do a Return of the Jedi verse too.
  5. dancing_star Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 24, 2007
    star 4
    Oh wow! This was just awesome!! :cool: =D= I love writing song parodies- they're a lot of fun. :D
    Looking forward to the ROTJ post! Wonderful job! ...And nice to have you back! [:D]@};-
    =D= =D==D==D=
  6. Nyota's Heart Combos & Paragraphs Host

    Game Host
    Member Since:
    Aug 31, 2004
    star 6
  7. ShrunkenJedi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 26, 2003
    star 5
    dancing_star: It's so good to see you here, too, and to be back! I'm really glad you thought it was awesome, thank you. :D And yes, I love, love, love song parodies too (as if you haven't guessed that!) [:D]

    Jade_eyes: Glad you think so, THANKS!

    Working on ROTJ verse, should be up shortly :D
  8. dancing_star Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 24, 2007
    star 4
    Oh wow!! Loved it!! [face_love] You're so good at these!! [face_dancing]Another amazing job!! [:D]=D=
  9. ShrunkenJedi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 26, 2003
    star 5
    [face_blush] Aw, thanks again!
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