Before A Case of Doomed Diplomacy (Part Two Up!)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Fluff-Slayer, Aug 3, 2005.

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  1. Fluff-Slayer Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 12, 2005
    star 2
    Title: A Case of Doomed Diplomacy
    Genre: Angst/drama/mystery.
    Timeframe: JA
    Cannon Characters: Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon.
    Summary: Qui-Gon accepts a ?doomed? (but trivial) mission, and is caught in the middle of more serious--if more personal--problems.
    Notes: Written in regards to Layren's birthday, and posted a few days early because I'm afraid I'll lose my nerve otherwise.
    Thanks: To Master, to Princess_A, and to sheleigh, who read bits and snippets and helped my aching confidence a little.

    ------------**PART**ONE**-------------

    ?If that?s how you feel, Master Jedi, then we have nothing to discuss.?

    ?At last, Ambassador Gent, I am pleased to say I can agree with you.?

    For a moment, no one moved. The politicians sat frozen in their seats, incredulous and shaken, each waiting to see what the others would do before he reacted. Gent, ruddy-faced and tense, rose from his chair sharply as though he planned to strike the tall Jedi, then (perhaps spotting the lightsaber tied at his belt) turned, muttering obscenities, and strode through the door, lacking even the politeness to close it behind him. Once he had gone, the spell seemed to break.

    Politicians of all statures and species rose hesitantly and made their way past the Master Jedi and his apprentice, watching them nervously as though afraid they might draw their weapons and attack.

    Of course, nothing of the sort happened, and the room cleared without any incident.

    Qui-Gon closed his eyes and sought peace. He could feel his apprentice?s gaze upon his face, the changeable blue-green eyes that sought his in their confusion. ?Master??? he asked tentatively.

    ?Please go and retrieve another copy of our room key from the front desk, Obi-Wan. I seem to have misplaced the original.?

    Blinking, the boy murmured, ?Yes, Master,? and hastened to obey without question, controlling the youngling-like urge to gape over his shoulder as he left. Qui-Gon waited before the sound of footsteps had ebbed before burying his face in his hands.

    It had been 'a case of doomed diplomacy' from the moment they had entered this small, cramped conference room. Qui-Gon was experienced in dealing with every type of bureaucrat?the whiny, the timid, the pompous, the heartless, the immature, the reckless? and yet this Ambassador Gent, who was supposed to be representing some small, almost unheard-of system, was an unpleasant mixture of each negative quality. He was irresponsible, preferring haste over innocent lives and monetary profit over mutual gain.

    He was, Qui-Gon summarized, the very sort of person one would never hope to meet. Before they had left Coruscant, it had been his intention (though he had not declared it) to let Obi-Wan take a more active role in the negotiations than usual, for his Padawan was moving up in years (fifteen almost to the day, Qui-Gon remembered with wonder). His mediation skills had improved greatly; his Master felt he was almost ready, and the Council agreed that he was, to sit beside Qui-Gon at the negotiating table instead of behind him.

    As it turned out, though, Qui-Gon was quite glad he had not mentioned his plans to anyone. For now, he had only the shattered mission to contend with. His Padawan?s guilt and concealed disappointment were not part of the equation, and for that he was tremendously grateful.

    The Council would not be pleased when he reported to them later, Jinn noted, but he knew at least one (short, green) Master that would not be surprised by the development. After all, knowing that a mission was destined to be a perfect example of doomed diplomacy had never stopped Yoda from dispatching Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan before?if he didn?t know better, Qui-Gon would have to think he had done something to anger the ancient Jedi?

    Images of commotion caused by an awkward young boy and a very distinctive, very knobby old stick fluttered to the top of his consciousness, but he pushed them away, endeavoring, again, to release th
  2. Gkilkenny Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2004
    star 4


    I have never known another person with this rare, odd skill that you possess so readily, of being young and old all at once. You truly are a special being, Padawan mine.

    I am glad Qui-Gon thinks Obi-wan is special, you could feel the concern, he had for his apprentice and the fact he was glad he didn't let Obi help with the mission.

    Very nice piece.[face_dancing]
  3. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    Up until Qui-Gon asked for a table for 3 I thought this excursion was spontaneous, but it seems otherwise. :D

    I forget?it seems like just yesterday you and Xani were sitting in here. Fine young lad, that one?? Whoa... things change for the Jedi as well Alloi. Now what went on to have Alloi dismiss his wait staff and let things beomce so unkept??

    Here's your hug Fluff-Slayer [:D].
  4. Kynstar Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2004
    star 5
    Well done! I enjoyed this so far! [:D] And I as well grant you the 'writers' hug' :D

    Loved the imagery and emotions! Great characterizations too :D
  5. Princess_Arulmozhi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 16, 2004
    star 4
    Ah, great going, Fluffy[ :D ] <is jealous of Layren, as self's birthday was months ago> . It got me hooked right from the start, beginning, as it were with doomed diplomatic missions, Obi feeling jumpy - and Alloi.Ah, looks like a great OC. And G7! Poor, poor Alloi, having to dismiss all his staff that way - hmm, me smells a mystery here. [face_mischief]

    Looking forward to more :)
  6. Layren Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2003
    star 5
    Oooh Wow you posted early! I am so proud! And what an excellent job you did too! This is absolutely fantastic :D There's more coming right??
  7. LilQui-Gon Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 29, 2004
    star 2
    Nice post Fluff, can't wait till the next chapter. ;)
  8. maychorian Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2005
    star 4
    Sweet! I like the way you're portrayng the Qui/Obi relationship--very sweet and genuine. And some lovely little mysteries.

    But oh, dear, I wouldn't be surprised at all if our little Padawan came down with a cold, now. This mission seems specifically designed to be disconcerting, if not downright miserable, for the poor boy.

    But if this is a gift for Layren, I am certain we'll be seeing some Qui-mush in here, too.

    Keep writing!
  9. Seven Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2000
    star 3
    Oh, wow Fluff-Slayer!

    This is most definatly a brilliant start!

    More soon please?

    Seven
  10. Fluff-Slayer Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 12, 2005
    star 2
    Gkilkenny- Thank you! :)

    Healer_Leona- Spontaneous? When was the last time you read a fic in which Qui-Gon did anything without reason? We're all so intent on making him this omniscient plot-mover-alonger... ha. Why indeed? (Thanks for the hug!) [:D]

    Kynstar- More Writers' hugs! And yay for good characterization!

    Princess- [face_not_talking] You said the F-word. Now I'm refusing to talk to you for a week. (For some reason, mystery seems to be leeching its way into most of my attempted-fics. I wonder if there's a bug going around? :confused:) Okie-dokie. More more more.

    Layren- Of course there is. O:)

    LilQui-Gon- Thank ya'!

    maychorian- Ten points for your use of the word "genuine". Poor Obi does catch it from every side in fanfifction, doesn't he? But I mean... at least I haven't had him pull a weapon on his Master or kill anyone or do anything otherwise OOC...well, yet. [face_mischief]

    Seven- Hello, Seven! :) *Complies*

    <<Actual post in a moment; I'm reading over it. (Being beta-less is sad...but you can't blame me for mistakes. :p>>
  11. Fluff-Slayer Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 12, 2005
    star 2
    The sun rose hesitantly on Tartia, casting forth its feeble light for only a few minutes before the murky cloud cover muted it. The morning showed all the signs of a truly dreary, drizzly day.

    A soft, stifled sound reached Qui-Gon?s sleeping ears, and he opened his eyes. In the gloom of the early-morning hours and the dimmed lights, he could make out the dark outline of his student?s frame. It quivered with suppressed coughing, which was steadily growing louder, despite obvious attempts made to keep it quiet. Qui-Gon sat up slowly. ?Padawan?? he asked softly, and the noise paused. There was a thick swallow.

    ?I?m fine, Master.?

    It was an insipid, mechanical reassurance, spoken by lips that seemed pale and unsure of themselves. With worry, Qui-Gon noted the change in the room temperature: it was suddenly very cold. The thermosensers were programmed to adjust according to the guest?s outward body temperature. Which meant?

    ?You?re burning up,? said the Master, his judgment confirmed by a light brush of the overheated cheek.

    ?I?m fine,? repeated the other determinedly.

    Qui-Gon stood up and turned on the lights, stretching his sleep-softened muscles and checking the time. He was surprised to find the hours nearing noon; the frail light that came through the transparasteel suggested it was still not quite past seven. ?I have a few things I?d like to do before we leave tomorrow,? said Qui-Gon noncommittally, picking up his mug from the night before and dumping out the cold contents of Obi-Wan?s.

    ?All right,? said Obi-Wan, clearing his throat. ?When do we leave??

    The tall Jedi smiled at the cup in the sink, but when he turned to face the adolescent, his expression was calm and serious. ?These matters are personal, not mission-related. I would prefer that you stay here in the hostel and recover. We?ll have a long journey tomorrow, and the Council would kill me if I brought an epidemic to the Temple.?

    ?Master, I think you might be overreacting,? said Obi-Wan judiciously. ?It?s only a cold.?

    ?That?s possible, but I would rather we be safe.? Obi-Wan?s face fell, but he bit his tongue, unwilling to contradict his teacher again. Qui-Gon clapped his shoulder. ?Humor your old Master, Padawan,? he said lightly. ?My heart is getting on in years. I doubt it will be able to handle another of your near-death experiences for at least a couple of months. I?m still recuperating from the last one.?

    That warranted a reluctant chuckle. ?Please don?t stay gone too long,? Obi-Wan murmured halfheartedly, blinking at the carpet.

    ?I won?t,? Qui-Gon assured him. ?It shouldn?t take more than a couple of hours.?

    ?When you get back??

    ?Yes??

    ?Could we please go for a walk?? The hesitance in the simple question was endearing.

    ?We?ll see,? said Qui-Gon. ?If you stay in bed, that is.?

    ?Yes, Master.?

    ?No sneaking out.?

    ?Sneaking out?? You think I?d do such a thing after you?ve confined me to a sickbed??

    ?Just be still. Get some rest. Ah?? said Qui-Gon, seeing the familiar warning signs of a protest. ?You heard me. Rest.?

    ?Honestly, Master.? Exasperation replaced the all-suffering air. ?It?s almost like you don?t trust me.?

    Qui-Gon tousled the auburn locks in a loving gesture. ?Honestly, Padawan,? he said in a voice that was half mock thoughtfulness, half sadness. ?It?s almost like you want to believe that I don?t.?

    ------------**PART**TWO**------------

    The previous evening?s rain had left its traces upon the city, wet and lackluster and lonesome?and yet, the air still promised more, hanging cold and heavy from the steadily darkening, swirling clouds.

    Reluctantly, the masses had resumed traveling. They were bundled up more warmly than the day before, and their strides were all longer, swifter, more purposeful. No one liked to linger on days like this, when every chilling gust of wind brought more of that looming-storm smell, and the sky looked more ominous with every passing moment.

    One man was the exception to the hustle and bustle. He was t
  12. Layren Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 28, 2003
    star 5
    Oooooooooooooooh intriguing developments you have here... I can't wait to see where you go with this! This is fantastic!
  13. Kynstar Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 2, 2004
    star 5
    Hey I liked the guy to! :p How sad :( Qui senses that he will not be back...and how sad to know it is true.

    Great job! :D
  14. Seven Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2000
    star 3
    Another wonderful section!

    I have to wonder what Qui is up to though. Hn...

    Oh, more soon please?

    Seven
  15. Healer_Leona Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 7, 2000
    star 9
    My heart is getting on in years. I doubt it will be able to handle another of your near-death experiences for at least a couple of months. I?m still recuperating from the last one.?

    Aw, love the relationship between the two of them. Hmmm, so there's quite the history between Qui-Gon and people of this planet.. interesting, most interesting. I enjoyed Mr. Smip as well... and look forward to seeing these other people.
  16. Princess_Arulmozhi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 16, 2004
    star 4
    I echo HL. Everything's taking a mysterious turn...and these characters! Ooh. <disregards F_S's morose expression at having referred to her as ...well...>Fine. I call you 'Slayer'. That better?
  17. maychorian Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 7, 2005
    star 4
    Yes, I like Mr. Smip, too. [:D] I'm curious about what past adventures Qui-Gon had on this planet though. It must have been quite a story, for him to form such firm friendships.

    I like your style. Great descriptions, especially of nature.

    Poor Obi! :p I expected it, but still. Hopefully it's not pneumonia or anything, just a normal little head cold. And Qui-Gon will get back and take care of him, right? :)

    Great job! Keep writing!
  18. sheleigh Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 31, 2002
    star 4
    I adore the direction you are taking this so far. Mr. Smip is a great OC.

    But I'm with May on this one- just what adventures did Qui-Gon have prior to this mission?

    Needless to say, a wonderful post as always, Fluff-Slayer! [:D]

    Wish I had more time to ramble on. Eagerly awaiting more.

    sheleigh
  19. CodeName_Targeter Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 7, 2003
    star 5
    Eep! Late again. :(

    Anyways, I like the direction you're taking this. Poor Qui, he knows he'll never come back. :( *sniffs*
  20. VadersMistress Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 7, 2004
    star 6
    Qui... :_|

    Excellent story! I love the direction of this. Qui-Gon stories are nearly always good. =D= Great job!
  21. Bastet Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 30, 1999
    star 4
    I just found this, and I must say, it's off to a great start. [face_love] I'm curious about Qui's previous mission(s) to this planet, how he got to know all those people so well. I wonder what Qui is going to find out about what happened to the planet, or at least Alloi's resturaunt, since he left. Hmmm...
    I look forward to more, this is great stuff! :D
  22. Gkilkenny Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2004
    star 4


    WoW got lost in all the traffic around here

    ?Honestly, Master.? Exasperation replaced the all-suffering air. ?It?s almost like you don?t trust me.?

    Poor Obi he still has no confidence. Qui give Obi a hug and tell him you love him.

    "Whats Qui-Gon up to? I want to know soon please8-}


  23. stormqueen874 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 7, 2005
    star 4
    Hm... your plot has sunk its claws into me, and now I'm hooked. I need to know what happens! What kind of adventures did Qui-Gon have here? Why did all the waitresses (and waiters, I presume) get fired? How much has changed? Arrgggg, I hate waiting!

    My heart is getting on in years. I doubt it will be able to handle another of your near-death experiences for at least a couple of months. I?m still recuperating from the last one.

    This just cracked me up. You've captured Qui-Gon perfectly and I eagerly await the rest of the story!

    Stormqueen
  24. DaenaBenjen42 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 15, 2005
    star 5
    Very interesting. :)

    Can't wait to see where you go next with this. (And I'm wondering, too: Why did the wait staff have to leave?)

    Good story. :)
  25. Princess_Arulmozhi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Nov 16, 2004
    star 4
    <tries to entice Fluffy with plotbunnies> Eh...there's no chance of this getting updated?

    Uppies!
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