Saga A Day in the Life of Padme Amidala (Skywalker)--early-ROTS humor vignette

0500 Alarm goes off
0502 Alarm stops once I finish cursing it and decide to simply demolish it.
0503 Decide to pretend my alarm didn't go off
0504 Human alarm Captain Typho comms to make sure the smashing and banging sounds weren't an assassination attempt.
0505 Decide to get out of bed.
0506 Start pre-natal yoga routine
0515 Decide that pre-natal yoga lady got brain-damage from too many sun salutes.
0516 Head to the kitchen to make a nutritious breakfast.
0525 Finish making breakfast and sit down to eat it while catching up on the morning news.
0526 Get up to add a scoop of tchak-nut butter and a pickled tuber.
0527 Activate Threepio.
0528 THreepio tells me that it is perfectly acceptable to have healthy cravings, but I haven't heard of them.
0528 Shut off C-3PO for that crack about cravings.
0529 Eat the scoop of tchak-nut butter in a single swallow, ignore the tuber, and decide to eat the rest of my nutritious breakfast on the way to the Senate.
0531 Consult wardrobe
0532 Choose the corseted gown from Alderaan
0535 Activate Threepio to help me get into it.
0545 Give up on trying to do up the fastenings, consult wardrobe
0550 Decide on that flowing gown and cape that I got from Sola last year.
0551 Shower
0621 Finish shower
0622 Begin brushing hair
0627 Pause brushing to soliloquize. It helps clear my mind.
0628 Resume brushing
0631 Pause and design baby's room on Naboo
0731 This is why I wake up at 0500
0732 Resume brushing
0733 Finish brushing, consult cookbooks for hairstyle.
0735 Start hairstyle
0835 Finish hair
0836 Change mind on dress. Choose another tent.
0840 Finish dressing
0845 Pack for day
0847 Leave for Senate building
0850 Does this make me look fat?
0852 Take a poll.
0853 Shut off Threepio again for saying "Yes."
0855 Arrive at Senate
0856 Tease Bail about his fashion sense
0857 Tease Palpatine about his halitosis
0900 Session starts
0901 Take notes
0927 Wake up when the loudspeaker malfunctions and squeals at me and yell "I object!" as Mas Amedda is announcing that there will be no tuber salad allowed at the Senate picnic.
0928 Propose a resolution that will let us have egg salad at the picnic instead.
0929 Resolution passes. Tracks covered.
0930 Take more notes and pass one to Corde to kick me every time I fall asleep.
0936 Corde kicks me.
0942 Corde kicks me again.
0945 I inform her that if she kicks me again, she's fired.
1000 She kicks me again. I fire her.
1001 Mood swing. She's my best friend and is getting a pay raise for coming back on the job.
1002 Mood swing again. She should be sued for breach of contract for kicking me in order to get fired.
1003 Mood swing again. She brings some hot chocolate and all is forgiven.
1004 She offers to take notes for me.
1030 Have forgotten about the speech I'm supposed to make in five minutes.
1035 Finish draft of heartwarming patriotic speech of doom, start it.
1130 Finish patriotic speech of doom that didn't turn out to be very heartwarming. I stink at idealism.
1131 Take herbal tranquilizer to get through the rest of the day.
1200 Senate adjourned for lunch.
1215 Arrive at Dexter's, get a bantha burger, jawa juice, and the Gestation Grub special that satisfies all of my cravings.
1217 Finish eating, pay bill, take refuge in the speeder.
1255 Return to Senate, allow general fawning over my speech.
1300 Session resumes
1305 Make a motion to dismiss the Military Strategic Planning Committee so they can meet.
1310 Motion passed. Off we go to argue about the war.
1315 Choose the comfortable chair so Senator Chufet will be in a bad mood and more willing to do whatever I tell him.
1317 Chufet is rushed to the medcenter because his chair broke when he sat on it and it gave him a heart attack
1318 Start meeting because it's "What he would have wanted."
1320 Bring up the issue of bringing General Kenobi and Commander Skywalker's squadrons to Coruscant to shore up the defenses.
1321 The arguing begins
1325 Senator Chufet's favorite protege, Commander Tarkin, says "I would drag them away fro

 

hilarious! if only Padme did become chancellor.

poor 3PO

 

Dang, that girl isn't on a mood swing, she's on a mood tilt-a-whirl! Great job!

 

LOL! I love the bit about the alarm clock!

 

aldocassidy--hilarious! if only Padme did become chancellor.

poor 3PO

As long as her speech wasn't another "WAKE UP! YOU MUST WAKE UP!" one. Poor 3po indeed. Now you know where Leia got it from.

Discorpor8--Dang, that girl isn't on a mood swing, she's on a mood tilt-a-whirl! Great job!

LOL, that's a great analogy.

Idrelle_Miocovani--LOL! I love the bit about the alarm clock!

Based on a friend of mine.

 

This was kinda weird. I was in the middle of writing "A day in the life of Obi-Wan Kenobi" and then I came here and saw this.

Anyway, this was hilarious! I think I liked the brushing-thing most.

 

LOL, sorry, couldn't resist the hair-brushing thing because that was the MOST POINTLESS SCENE IN ALL OF THE STAR WARS MOVIES! :-D I'm going to read your Obi-Wan one.

 

very funny

 

Thanks.

 

: 0850 Does this make me look fat?

Umm... pregnant?? Duh. Not exactly easy to hide twins and maintain that shapely figure at the same time.

: 1215 Arrive at Dexter's, get a bantha burger, jawa juice, and the Gestation Grub special that satisfies all of my cravings.

Eek.

 

Oh, come on, the moral of Ep3 was that you can be 9 months pregnant with twins and still have no one notice until you're sitting down and have no lap. I mean, come on! Obi-Wan 3/4 of the way through the movie "Oh, wait, um, you're kinda fat! Is that anakin's fault?"

LOL, what you don't want Gestation Grub?

 

Wow, I've never seen a fic like this before. Nice original idea, Ish!

 

LOL, there are plenty of other fics like it, listed in Writers Resource Forum under Day in the Life of...

And most of them are much better than this one!

 

Oh, never even heard of those fics. Well, anyways, I like this one, good job

 

Glad to hear it.

 

OMG, this is hysterical.

I remember they used to have these "Day in the Life of..." fics back on the old Classic board. I forgot how much I missed them. I love her mood swings and her power-shopping for figure-concealing gowns.

 

Every woman, even Padme, feels like she looks fat sometimes! That was great!

 

LOL oh that was great especially telling Anakin to drive Grievious towards Coruscant lol

 

TorontoJediMaster--OMG, this is hysterical.

I remember they used to have these "Day in the Life of..." fics back on the old Classic board. I forgot how much I missed them. I love her mood swings and her power-shopping for figure-concealing gowns.

LOL, yes, that's where i got the inspiration--the Classic board ones. THe mood-swings were my fave part.

Dally--Every woman, even Padme, feels like she looks fat sometimes! That was great!

LOL, I like the "Even padme" because that's kinda the point of these sorts of things, to show the typicalness of the atypical heroes.

JediFalcon--LOL oh that was great especially telling Anakin to drive Grievious towards Coruscant lol

LOL, yes, subtle hint!

 

this stuff is hilarious! Can't really quote anythign because I'd probably end up quoting the whole thing! Man, her mood swings are great! Someone should really catch on eventually...

 

LOL, thank you very much.

 

0733 Finish brushing, consult cookbooks for hairstyle

Hilarious! I especially loved that entry

 

LOL, like mum, like kid.