A Long Road Home (Qui/Obi angst) [#17 - 02-11-03] (Fourth Update!) COMPLETED

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Aunecah_Skywalker, Jan 30, 2003.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Aunecah_Skywalker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 25, 2002
    star 5
    Well, I guess I can't go any length of time on this boards without writing an Obi-story. Let me see if this sequel is as interesting as the Whence the Pendulum Swung . Hopefully, I'll not disappoint my readers. :D

    I hope the title isn't taken. LOL.

    (For any of you who haven't read Whence the Pendulum Swung , here's a summary:

    Qui-Gon is sent to Kusun to investigate claims that PhotoMem (a device that supposedly gives you photographic memory) has nasty side-effects - like headaches. Upon coming there, Qui-Gon finds out that PhotoMem does a lot worse, and actually causes a brain damage. There's an asylum where the PhotoMem company keeps all those patients who the device had been tested on, and one of them is Obi-Wan Kenobi. He has a very short span of visual memory (one or two minutes), but he has a very good "acoustic memory."

    Qui-Gon rules that the PhotoMem be discontinued and penalties be payed (some generous credits) and he takes Obi-Wan with him to Coruscant, in the hopes that he can take Obi-Wan as his apprentice.



    A Long Road Home
    by Aunecah_Skywalker

    .*.*.*.*.*.

    Sometimes, Qui-Gon Jinn wished that the Healers would just come out and say the truth to his face. Other times, he hoped that they had the initiative to tell him that everything was going to be all right even if they could only hope for it. Half a month had passed since he had met the young boy with a medical condition, and Obi-Wan Kenobi still hadn't regained his conscious. The Healers were unable to understand what was wrong with him - they were now concluding that it could be anywhere from a self-defense mechanism to a coma brought upon by being drugged. Damaged brains sometimes worked quite abnormally, and the galaxy was far from achieving that state of knowing the cause of all actions - some normal, some crazy - that a living being performed.

    Obi-Wan's unresponsive state was not the only thing that was bothering the Jedi Master either. At eighteen, Obi-Wan was too old to become a Padawan. The Council was split in half over whether or not to accept him into the Jedi Order; some, like Master Yoda and Master Yaddle, were calm but fierce proponents of his acceptance; and others like Master Plo Koon and Master Oppo Rancisis, were starkly against it. The rest were wading somewhere in between, cynical of Obi-Wan's abilities and sympathetic of his injuries. Even Mace Windu, Qui-Gon's friend since childhood, wasn't completely with him on this issue, and that made Qui-Gon wonder if it was such a good idea to take Obi-Wan as his apprentice after all.

    He wouldn't be honest if he didn't say that Mace's arguments made sense.

    Qui-Gon exhaled deeply as he saw the polar caps of the distant mountains reflecting the late-evening skies that were quickly turning into the dark velvet of the space. He felt the Jedi coming in long before the door actually opened and he stepped into the Jedi balcony. The timing and the mood were strangely (almost eerily) similar to the time when they had last talked here.

    "His midi-chlorine analysis report came back," Mace intoned, not looking at him. "He has a high count."

    "Of course." Qui-Gon frowned. "He had been admitted to the Order already, and had been ... rejected only because no Master was willing to take him as his apprentice. Why would you need another midi-chlorine analysis?"

    Mace shrugged. "Anything could have happened in the last five years."

    Qui-Gon let out a deep breath, and then said, "Is he to be trained then?"

    Mace took his time formulating an answer. Then he shook his head. "No, he will not be trained," he said with a sigh. "The vote was close - six to five."

    Silence.

    "He is meant to be a Jedi, you have to see it, Mace."

    "Maybe so, but his future is clouded; even Master Yoda can't see it. And" - Mace hesitated a moment - "you can't say that he ... is in fit condition to be an apprentice."

    "You talk about his brain injury."

    " 'Damage' would be a better word, Qui-G
  2. Jedi_Suzuran Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 22, 2002
    star 5
    This is very interesting, Aunecah. Why didn't Qui-Gon take Obi-Wan as his apprentice?

    I guess that's answered in the prequel, which I'll have to read. :p
  3. Arwen-Jade_Kenobi Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2002
    star 5
    Whoa [face_shocked] Nice opening post, I'm hooked!

    Stupid council :mad: Sometimes I wonder what there problem is, only to remember that this is their soul purpose: to cause inconvenience.

    Ah well, whatcha gonna do.

    MORE!
  4. Mel_J Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jan 6, 2003
    star 1
    I'm so glad you've done a sequel to 'Whence the Pendulum Swung', and this is shaping up to be just as good!

    Poor Obi-Wan, just when Qui finally sees sense, almost everyone else seems to be against him (I liked that Yoda was a supporter though). But Qui-Gon shouldn't have dragged the kid so far just to have doubts now.

    It will be interesting to see if Qui will be willing to go to the same lengths he was with Anakin and quit the Order to keep Obi, and if there is anything left of the Jedi training in the boy.
  5. Obi the Kid Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Apr 13, 2000
    star 4
    Oh I like this beginning. Even though I havent read the prequel to this. Do you have the link to that story? I'd like to check that one out.

    Looking forward to more of this one!

    Obi
  6. Aunecah_Skywalker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 25, 2002
    star 5
    Oy! Readers.

    Suzuran : Read the prequel. It's all answered in there. (And while you're at it, tell me what you thought of it. ;))

    Arwen : Yeah, the Council sometimes does seem that way, doesn't it? More. So soon? You'll have to wait until at least tomorrow dear lady. And depending on how my computer homework goes, you might or might not get a post. 8-} Just kidding; of course you'll get a post tomorrow.

    Mel_J : Thanks. And, in Amidala's style: "We will see" about the rest of it. [face_devil]

    Obi the Kid : Oh, thanks. :) The link is in my bio. It's completely from Qui's POV, and written in first person. It's a very short read, though. :)

    EDIT: For some reason, the link isn't working :mad:

    Aunecah
  7. Cascadia Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Wow! I'm glad to see the sequel up, Aunecah!

    I like Qui-Gon's determination about Obi-Wan being trained. Hope to see more soon! :D

    Here's a link to the prequel [link=http://boards.theforce.net/message.asp?topic=10181574&replies=0]Whence the Pendulum Swung[/link]
  8. Aunecah_Skywalker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 25, 2002
    star 5
    Thanks Cascadia . I plan on posting more today. And how did you get the link to work? For some reason, it refused to work for me. :mad:

    Aunecah
  9. Aunecah_Skywalker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 25, 2002
    star 5
    Never wrote a news article before - well, not really, anyway. Do tell me what you think. ;)

    ~*~*~*~


    Many things happened that day - some good, many bad - but Coruscant remained unchanged.

    It was a bitter irony that light didn't exist without darkness, and that the darkness had no shape without the light. And the cityplanet that housed the nexus of light was attacked by armies of darkness from all sides, within and without. Crime ran rampent in the Underground, unchecked and unregulated, while the upper levels thrived with greedy politicians who cared little for the troubles of the galaxy. If they were given a million diateries everytime they did something - pass a law, agree upon a resolution, even come to session to discuss - for the sake of the galaxy and the people who elected them, they would still be some of the poorest in the galaxy. On the other hand, if they were given a quarter of a diaterie every time they acted out of the thirst for power and hunger for money, more money, and even more money, they would be richer than some of the biggest business tycoons out there.

    Qui-Gon cared little for the politicans and at times like these, he was hard-pressed not to agree with his old, former Master, Dooku.

    The Republic was on its last legs, rotting from the inside while showing a strong and powerful facade on the outside. Its democracy would in the end be its ruin; people had long since stopped caring about who was in the office and who wasn't, and democracy failed the day people stopped believing in it.

    If the news of a dozen wartorns planets and destruction wrecked by brutal pirates or smugglers reached their ears, they shrugged and went on about their daily business, occasionally pausing to preach to their friends that perhaps those planets and the people "deserved it" - here's hoping that the wars would end tomorrow, but it really didn't matter any because the planets were so far away and so insignificant to have any effect on them. If they wouldn't export the diamonds because they couldn't, then so what? There were five dozen other planets who were willing to sell diamonds - at a lower rate, and so quality meant little, natural or artificial - it was all the same.

    Sometimes Qui-Gon wondered why the Jedi allied themselves with the Republic in the first place - why make themselves a branch - an "independent ally" in theroy, but a branch within the central government in practice - in a government that was bound to fail - if not today, then tomorrow, if not tomorrow, then the day after, and if not then, sometime in the future - near or far?

    The Republic officials now lacked the dedication and the perseverence of the Founders - their goals to fight over tyranny and oppression for democracy, over wars for peace, over death for life. The officials lacked their will to make the galaxy a better place to live.

    So similar had the goals of the Jedi and the Founders been that they had worked hand in hand for a millennia, first to create a law that would promote justice and peace, and then to enforce that law to the best of their ability. But now the Jedi and the Republic's interests were the polar opposites, one wanting to save life, the other not caring one way or another as long it wasn't their door that the death was standing before - but pulling back now would be political suicide, equalled to betrayal, turning their backs on humanity and justice, by those who were willing to go to any lengths to secure name and fame. It wasn't as if working alongside the Republic was stopping them from doing that anyway, and the Jedi knew that they would be giving the Republic its death sentence by pulling out now.

    They would never cause a war, willingly or unwillingly - they only fought reluctantly when a war started.

    Politics.

    Qui-Gon knew them only too well, and sometimes he wished he didn't.

    They were disgusting enough for the stench to follow him into the next galaxy.

    He handled the datapad as if it were a fragile treasure that would break at the slightest pressure. Des
  10. Arwen-Jade_Kenobi Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2002
    star 5
    Whoa, I wanna kill the guy who wrote that.

    That was a compliment, it was a great article and the part with Qui before was excellent

    Here's a big UP!
  11. NyghtFyre Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Oct 14, 2002
    star 4
    Great start Aunecah! I just read through "Whence" and thoroughly enjoyed it. I look forward to future postings to see where the story will go from here! Good Luck!
  12. Jedi_Suzuran Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 22, 2002
    star 5
    I think the article was well written, Aunecah.

    And I agree with Arwen here. :)
  13. Mel_J Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jan 6, 2003
    star 1
    I enjoyed the article- it really shows how easily propaganda by the press can be so misinformed and how the people no longer see the Jedi as a vaulted organisation.
  14. Aunecah_Skywalker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 25, 2002
    star 5
    Arwen : Wow, thanks. :) I liked that part about Qui too.

    NyghtFyre : New reader. :) Thanks for both things.

    Suzuran : Why thank you. I guess I was just a little unsure about how it was going to turn out.

    Mel_J : Which was my basic intent, actually.

    Well, if I'm in a really good mood later in the evening, then I might post another part later today. We will get Obi's introduction in the next one = kind of. ;)

    Aunecah
  15. Aunecah_Skywalker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 25, 2002
    star 5
    Apparently I can't stop myself from posting here once I have it written - whether or not I'm in a happy mood. Here's a big long post. :D

    ~*~*~*~

    The morning dawned bright and golden, and the first of the birds were starting to sing in a cacophony to wake everybody up. The omnipresent air-traffic buzzed past the buildings in a meandering path, flying across the crescent of the rising sun like a gigantic fly, adding its own happy drone to the background noise that accompanied all twilights on most worlds.

    The bustling city-planet was going about its business as usual, and not even the forecast of a particularly nasty thunderstorm later this day, probably near the late evening, could not stop the rush hour. The aircars and speeders dwindled by as the airlanes all broke down in traffic jams, while their occupants eyed with distaste the dark clouds that were slowly but steadily moving toward them.

    The storm-clouds in the stratosphere occupied the idle curiosity of not only those cursing the slow traffic, but also the distracted attention of one lonely Jedi Master standing somewhere up in the upper floors of the Jedi Temple, a towering edifice of magnificent beauty that was patterned with subtle symbolic definitions and meanings that were all but lost on those who looked upon it from the streets.

    Qui-Gon Jinn stared out of the arched windows, trying not to let the gloomy weather depress him even further. The Jedi Temple was closer to the thunderheads than much of the watching traffic, and Qui-Gon had a strange feeling that the Temple was going to get the brunt of the storm when it actually struck.

    This was strange, actually, the sudden shift in the weather pattern. It had been nearly two and a half decades since it had as much as sprinkled anywhere on Coruscant, and nearly three times as long since gray clouds had been seen scrutinizing the "Jedi Temple part" of the world.

    The storm had almost come in out of nowhere, and was now threatening to wreck havoc. Though it hardly looked like it from the outside, rumors ? facts, rather ? held it that the Disaster Control center was pushing for an emergency vote in the Senate for switching the power over from shields of the planet as a whole to shields of the individual buildings.

    Qui-Gon smiled ruefully.

    He didn't know the Senate to get anything done quickly, but this time their own necks were on the line as well, and the politicians weren't about to get killed by a thunderstorm, under a collapsed building. They would probably vote for the switch ? which would not make them all that much happier either (if he ignored the fact those senators were rarely ever happy). Coruscant was always a target, and there might be many out there waiting to take them up on this opportunity.

    So, naturally, the Senate would wait until one minute after the last hour to tell everyone the outcome of the vote.

    Politics.

    Qui-Gon sighed, noticing how all his thoughts seemed to revolve around that word.

    He shifted slightly, his legs just slightly touching the wall below the mullioned windows; one of his legs was tingling from being stood on for too long, without any movement. Qui-Gon desperately hoped that Healer Aganada would not choose this moment to make an entrance.

    Qui-Gon was in the Healers' ward, as the faint antiseptic smell testified.

    The reception hall ? not really a hall, but rather a glorified room that had little in the way of furniture and a lot in the way of space ? was deserted except for him, which might have struck him as being odd if he hadn't been so inattentive to his surroundings.

    There were only two places in the Jedi Temple that all Jedi went to at least once in their lifetimes, and were regularly rather overflowing with occupants (who came there with either grim indifference or solemn determination) ? one was the refresher, and the other was the Healers' ward.

    When he had first come here, asking to see Aganada, the apprentice who had been present had told him that Aganada was "busy," and that he might have to wa
  16. Obi the Kid Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Apr 13, 2000
    star 4
    I have to say I do believe this is one of the best stories I have read in a long time. I love your style of writing. Very easily draws the reader in and keeps them there. And I am very much enjoying your characterization of Qui-Gon.


    Obi
  17. Jedi_Suzuran Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 22, 2002
    star 5
    I liked it. :D

    Still, the real question comes: what happens when he wakes up? ?[face_plain]
  18. Cascadia Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Wonderful posts, Aunecah!

    For some reason I feel that Obi-Wan isn't going to be completely well when he wakes up. :(
  19. Aunecah_Skywalker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 25, 2002
    star 5
    Obi the Kid : Thanks. :D
    Suzuran : That is the real question, isn't it?
    Cascadia : Your feelings do serve you well. [face_devil]

    Aunecah
  20. Aunecah_Skywalker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 25, 2002
    star 5
    Here's the next post. Oh yes, the one after this is an exclusively Obi-Wan post - one from his POV. :D

    ~*~*~*~

    Qui-Gon sat down on the bench wearily that afternoon. It was his favorite place in the whole garden, and possibly in all of Coruscant.

    It overlooked a gentle slope of plains lost in the blooms of rainbow-colored flowers whose name he had always had trouble committing to memory. The bench was set in a clearing in the botanical gardens, on top of a gentle hillock, affording him a view of more trees and flowers than most other clearing-spots.

    The botanical gardens of the Jedi Temple were some of the few remaining natural beauties in this world.

    Centuries upon centuries of building and rebuilding ? torn by war because Coruscant got to be the lucky planet that was the headquarters of all galactic governments ? had rendered Coruscant a planet of technological excess, an accumulation of thousands of tons of durasteel raised in multiple layers.

    At least the Environmental Protection committee had prevented the world from becoming a replica of Duro, and many other planets before Duro, that had been wasted away of all available resources, and now left bereft by its inhabitants who had gone to prey upon another planet now that there was nothing left for them here anymore.

    It wasn't like Qui-Gon to dwell on depressing thoughts.

    He lived in the "here and the now," as it should be ? what was done was done, and what was going to be done was going to be done; there was no point in moaning and groaning about either.

    Then again, Qui-Gon was doing many things that he had never (or rarely ever) done in the past ? like shouting. At the Jedi Council.

    He had always believed that a Jedi's true loyalty should be to the Force ? not to his master, not to the Jedi Council, and certainly not to the Republic. There were few who agreed with his school of thought, and even Master Yoda wasn't fanatical about it.

    And, at times like these, that became a problem.

    The Council of the Twelve held an office in the tallest spire of the Jedi Temple, a chamber that afforded a breathtaking, three hundred and sixty-degree view of the entire surroundings.

    It was said in the Temple that it was worth becoming a Council member just to get to be in this chamber every day.

    Qui-Gon wouldn't be part of an elite group such as this if they gave him a million diateries for it.

    He didn't enjoy coming here but he was always here ? many times because he had to, and other times because he was supposed to, and still other times because he felt he should.

    Today he was here because none of them ? or all of them, depending on how you saw it.

    The Twelve were silent, entertaining various degrees of frustration on their faces.

    Plo Koon spoke up first:

    "Master Qui-Gon, with all due respect, the matter is not up for a debate. The Council has decided and it isn't about to change its decision."

    Three standard hours later, the clouds had come closer ? were almost above them, in fact ? but the Council hadn't changed its mind. It was reluctant to trust planets' fate in the hands of a "mentally inept," as Plo Koon put it, boy.

    Qui-Gon could understand their concern. At a certain level.

    What he didn't understand was why the Council was so adamant about not giving Obi-Wan even a chance ? to prove them wrong.

    Qui-Gon believed, with every fiber in his body, that Obi-Wan could, would, become well. Aganada, other healers ? they would (he hoped) back him up if he asked to, but the Council was refusing to listen ? even Master Yoda.

    "He is meant to be a Jedi," Qui-Gon said tiredly.

    "So certain are you," said Yoda, his ears twitching as he thumped his gimer stick on the floor, "of the future."

    "I don't presume to know the future ? "

    "But you do," Yoda snapped. "Yes, you do."

    "?I only presume to know the will of the Force," Qui-Gon retorted. "It cannot be co-incidence that I was sent to Kusun ? and that I should be the one to meet him."

    Yoda made an indistinct noise in his th
  21. Aunecah_Skywalker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 25, 2002
    star 5
  22. PadawanKitara Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 31, 2001
    star 5
    Sorry, it took a while to find this :)
  23. Aunecah_Skywalker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 25, 2002
    star 5
    Thanks PadawanKitara . I thought maybe people stopped reading this because of all the 'fics that I've abandoned in the past. Never fear, though, I love this 'fic way too much to ever abandon it. :D

    Aunecah
  24. Aunecah_Skywalker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Mar 25, 2002
    star 5
    Oh, I just wrote the next post - which, as I mentioned, is Obi-centric. ;) Come on, quick, I need five more posts before I can post. :D 8-}

    Aunecah
  25. Cascadia Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    I'm still here, Aunecah. I don't know about anybody else, but the boards here have been messing up on me all day.

    Great post, though! :D
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.