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Adventures of funniness in RPGs

Discussion in 'Games: RPG & Miniatures' started by That_Random_Jedi, Nov 17, 2005.

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  1. That_Random_Jedi

    That_Random_Jedi Jedi Master star 3

    May 14, 2005
    I'm a member of an organization called GameBase 7, based primarily in Chicago. We're a bunch of demented geeks and every game we play is filled with humor and weirdness. I shall now list the weird and funny things that have occurred during our games.

    1. Somebody rammed a Dark Jedi with a speeder. On purpose.
    2. This one guy took out an entire squad of stormtroopers by driving a speeder overhead and dropping a stun grenade on them. Hehe, bowling for stormies!
    3. Someone else tried force-feeding a speeder to a giant carnivorous worm.
    4. One of my teammates got a color-changing poncho and proceeded to spend the rest of the game saying "Now it's red. Now it's green. Now it's blue" until we were all about ready to slap him.
    5. We have podracing. The rule is that at least SOME part of your pod must cross the finish line to win or place. This one guy wiped out 20 feet from the finish line, ripped the hood ornament off his pod and took off running.
    6. This one guy took out an IG-88 in one shot.
    7. Our motto is "We have a plan? How did that happen?"
    8. We had one teammate who got knocked out so many times she earned the title of 'Dirt-Nap Queen'.
    9. In one scenario, this hostile ship dumped energy-sucking biological waste on our ship. To slow the energy drain, we had to turn on every system we had. This one guy was flushing the ship's power toilet repeatedly. "Dump $#!t on US, will ya?!?!"
    10. We have what we call a 'Groundhog's Day' scenario. It's basically 'solve the puzzle or be stuck in a time loop forever'. This was on Dagobah and Yoda was in it. This one guy got so pissed off he took a potshot at Yoda. YODA of all people!!!
    11. Somebody actually called on the Dark Side in the module mentioned in #10. That's how frustrated he got. He took the evilness stat reduction and didn't even care.
    12. Three people got sent to hack a system mainframe. None of them knew how to work a computer properly.
    13. This one Jedi used the Force to con people into buying rotten meat.
    14. We had a Wookiee on our team once. Every time he passed by a desk or a counter, he'd stop and ask for a beer.
    15. The thing with Jedi in our game system, if they use the Force too strongly they'll attract the attention of the Emperor and Darth Vader. First time around, it's a bunch of stormtroopers. Second time, you get a Dark Jedi. This one guy botched his rolls so bad he got both in one game. We spent the rest of the game running like heck.
    16. We were infiltrating a factory and came up against a passcode-locked door. The team leader said, "Anybody got the proper authorization code?" Somebody else stepped up, said "Here's MY authorization!" and blew the door clean off its hinges.
    17. This one guy was a con artist. He successfully impersonated Darth Vader AND LIVED. His career goal is to do the same thing with the Emperor!
    18. The guy mentioned in #17 sounds exactly like Tony Soprano, accent and all.
    19. Some idiot gave a C-3PO model a blaster. Really.
    20. There was this one guy who had so many cybernetic enhancements that he could punch a Chicken Walker in the leg and knock it over. He did it, too!
    21. This one guy tried to rescue this other guy via swooping him off the field using a jetpack. They then promptly ran into a wall.
    22. Somebody managed to disable a capital ship with a stray shot.
    23. One time our team met up and we promptly started shooting at each other. Dark Side stat reductions all around!
    24. This one guy has everyone aboard his ship wear sealed suits and keeps his cabin flooded with knockout gas in case he's boarded.
    25. If you think #24 is bad, this other guy has all his external hatches wired with explosives. Somebody tried to board him and... BOOM! *splat* "Ouch..."
    26. This one guy owns a Droid Fighter from the Clone Wars. He calls it Rufus.
    27. Somebody strength-resisted six blaster shots with no damage whatsoever.
    28. One time, on Bespin, there was this Imperial spy who wired himself with explosives set to go off if he lost consciousness while in a large skyscraper. He kept trying to knock himself out so he c
  2. whiskers

    whiskers Jedi Grand Master star 4

    May 19, 2005
    40: A group of lvl. 4 NPCs managed to take out Darth Maul. OK, he was nearly dead after taking out both Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon, but still!

    41: Playing as an Ewok trader in the New Republic era (in a homebrew Star Wars d20 game in 1999) The GM got mad at me because I couldn't reach an identification panel. I guess he got mad because the Jawa was doing a bunch of stupid stuff.

    42: In the same game as #40, I had Jar Jar Binks testify before the Galactic Senate on his involvement in the Naboo crisis. Jar Jar then proceeded to tell the Senate of a Gungan boogyfish that eats up little lying Gungans while being sworn in.
  3. Rogue_Thunder

    Rogue_Thunder FanForce CR, Edmonton, Alberta, Canada star 6

    Jan 7, 2003
    30. Some knucklehead put TIE panels on an X-Wing cabin and flew that thing around.

    That's actually called an Ugly. Cannibalized starfighters are pretty common amongst pirates. There's rules for them in some WEG expansion.

    43. 4 5th level characters liberated Korriban from the Empire, then proceeded to capture the Corellian Corvette in orbit. They brough it back to the New Rep, who paid 2 million credits for it and all the loot they took. Now they're sixth level characters with 2 million credits that are thinking of starting up as pirates [face_worried] :p
  4. Xenon_gun

    Xenon_gun Jedi Youngling

    Apr 22, 2005
    44. (#4 reminded me of this,) (most of my funny stuff is what I heard of some other guys) This one guy was a thieving soldier, with a knack for mechanical stuff. His agenda was: Get in, shoot every semi-hostile NPC, talk later.

    45. One time that guy reinforced a helmet, added a glow rod, and, generally, made it the best helmet ever made.

    46. That same guy had a brilliant idea: to rob the credit bank. It would've suceeded were it not for hundreds of clones and Jedi which arrived at the scene shortly. The rest of the team is captured, but he is still running, and would've escaped using the grappling hook had he rolled high. (also, he'd have an awful lot of money) However he rolls low and is captured, too.

    47. The group was in a small room surrounded by mirror walls, however, when they look at any of them, their own image attacks and hurts them, and shots are deflected back (a really small room). That's when the guy (see 44-46) decides to use explosives (=D= ). Luckily for them, the group's hear-all, see-all (he has high wis, int, spot and listen)notices a way out, and they survive.

    48. (from my only campaign) The two of us (Soldier [me] and Scout [hear-all, see-all] in ROTE era) have to rescue a number of diplomats from a planet, which is occupied on the ground by pro-Separatist citizens. I get ideas generally including destroying communications posts (in order to draw guards out of the city), and these strange ideas:

    1) One of us attacks the comm post with clones and digs in, while the other rescues diplomats and then flies over the post, picking the rest up.

    2) We fly close to the city buildings (Jedi Academy style) and pick them up. This looks ok, until you notice that there are lots of buildings and tight passages, and none of us has decent piloting skills...

    In the end we rescue them in broad daylight, going back to the ship with them. Luckily, we didn't get into problems with city "security" until we arrived at the docking bay.
  5. That_Random_Jedi

    That_Random_Jedi Jedi Master star 3

    May 14, 2005
    49. Somebody kills Imperials with cybernetic parts solely to steal said parts. Supposedly they're for a Frankenstein-droid.

    50. We suck so badly we've even got a 'club' for people who've strength-resisted thermal detonators at point-blank range.

    51. We have a Verpine whose favorite hobby is blowing stuff up.

    52. (ties into #13, #14, #17, #18 and #33) One time we got sent to this backwater planet to sell a couple tons of meat and use the profit to buy some kind of valuable metal for the Rebellion. We had Tony (CENSORED!)ing Soprano working our deal, so we got a ridiculous amount of money. Then the Empire shows up. We run like heck, and encounter not one but SEVERAL Star Destroyers. By this time, the Wookiee mentioned in #14 and #33 was screaming his head off. Somebody said the classic line "I don't know... just fly casual... FLY CASUAL, DANGIT!" At this point the Star Destroyers start bombing the absolute heck outta the planet. Saturation bombing, they call it. As usual, we forgot to include a pilot in our team, so the Wookiee does it. He botches his astrogation roll so bad that he blows five character points just to get us outta there. We reached the Rebel cruiser and breathed a sigh of relief, only to realize that the Star Destroyers FOLLOWED us. They commence bombing the absolute heck out of the Rebel cruiser, so we jumped to hyperspace again. We were SO hosed by the time we left hyperspace...

    53. In #52, we blamed the stench of the rotting meat on the Wookiee and DIDN'T get our arms ripped off.
  6. Sev-07

    Sev-07 Jedi Youngling star 1

    Mar 24, 2005
    Here is a funny,

    Divolva the low lvled dug soldier, spotted a group of female twi'leks on a casino space station. Divolva decided he would go hang out with them,(they were getting intimate with each other)and was approached by a bounty hunter who was enjoying the view. Divolva was being an idiot and decided he would trash talk the bounty hunter, and within seconds Div was on the ground un-councious.

    The bounty hunter decided he would remove his...*cough* tackle I guess you could say.

    My character (a low lvl trando monk/force adept),who was enjoying the show, stepped up and said "i think he has learned his lesson"

    at that point the BH turned on me and I said, "I have no quarrel with you, I will take care of this little one." But he still left his initials on his cheek, so now he has a permanant scare on his cheek to remind him of how dumb he was.

    Im always saving his arse.
  7. Koohii

    Koohii Jedi Master star 5

    May 30, 2003
    The party found the mentally demented quasi-clone with corrupted mandalorian and jedi teaching they were chasing in a room. THe clone switched on his newly completed lightsaber. The party set a thermal detonator for 2 seconds, threw it in, and closed the door.

    My first character was killed by an overly successful coniving roll.
    BH: Who's this one.
    Wookie: oh he's nobody. You can kill him.
    BH: OK. (BLAM)

    We were tracking down a holovid star. He was working on an adventure show. This episode involved the characters attacking a Rancor. THe planet is a nature preserve, so there wasn't a lot of technology allowed. We pulled up to the set in a landspeeder.
    Guard: what are you doing here?
    Me: Hi. We're the stunt doubles.
    GM (Laughing):You tell him that! OK. Roll coniving.
    Me OoC: I love having 6D+2... 28
    Guard: You're late! Hurry up and get in there!

    Since I couldn't hurt the Rancor from the outside, using my jet pack I flew into its mouth with my sword (yes, sword) to attack it from the inside. Didn't work.

    A jedi apprentice stood by watching after a gang war as the survivor started walking to the bodies of the unconsious and dying rival gang members and shooting them dead.
    Other player: "Um, aren't you, as a jedi, supposed to be doing something to STOP this kind of senseless killing? They're helpless!"
    Jedi: "Um, excuse me? Miss? Please stop doing that."
    Other player: "That's what you say!!!" (More laughing)

    One character was spending an inordinate amount of time trying to get some recreation procreation time. Finally, I gave it to him. What he didn't know is that the person in question was a hermaphrodite, and that after satisfying himself, "she" demanded satisfaction. THe other 20 members of the company she was with knew what she was. Next time he got to base, everyone else knew about the incident too.
    Since then, there has been no time spend on RPG character nookie.

    A MSE-6 droid demanded transport off-planet from a party, by displaying a TD set on a deadman--um--dead-droid switch.

    Brainswapping is popular with our techs. THey like to put warbot brains into MSE-6 and protocol droid bodies.
  8. That_Random_Jedi

    That_Random_Jedi Jedi Master star 3

    May 14, 2005
    Anybody ever hear of a Great Marsh Wyrmm? Somebody killed one using a vibrorapier and a blaster. And absolutely nothing else.
  9. mavjade

    mavjade It's so FLUFFY! Fanfic Manager star 6 Staff Member Manager

    Sep 10, 2005
    We have so many I couldn't think of all of them if I tried but here are a few...

    -Two of the characters were trying to make lightsabers and had been looking for all the parts for several session.
    GM: You enter a cave and see shiny things sticking out of the rock (or something to that effect)
    Player: That reminds me...Where can we find lightsaber crystals around here?
    The GM just stared at him.

    -We were looking for an enemy and we knew he was in this heavily gaurded house. We managed to get through the parmeter but we were being chased. The GM tells us there is a door and two windows at ground level. Without thinking one player says, "I'll dive through the window." He dove head first into transparasteel, dazing himself instead of letting my character disable the door locking mechanism.

    -We did't have any much in the way of weaponry and had to get someone back that had been captured by the Sith. Our information told us he was on a rolling fortress (at least that was what it seemed like) and gaurded by air by a fighter squardron. The GM thought it was hillarious that we had very little and couldn't get any help becuase we were on a secret mission in the unknown regions (I think he was hopeing to kill someone off:p) . So we totaly took apart the ship we came in, it was in bad shape anyway. We cut the hull up into shrapnel and made "shatter" bombs (thanks to shadow bombs in NJO), made bombs out of engine parts etc. There wasn't a part that was left untouched.
    After we blitzed what was suposed to be an extreme encounter in 4 rounds (I think, but I know it was less than 6) one of the players looked up and said "yub yub GM"

    Thoes were just a few, but some of my favorites! I hope they aren't 'you had to be there' stories!

    Edit: I forgot a good one (it's also in my signature)

    My character asked her Master if they should stop and help someone (or something like that, I don't exactly remember what was going on. Only that we were in a hurry.) and he look at her and said:
    "There isn't time for heroic deeds."
    What a great thing for a Jedi Master to say!

  10. That_Random_Jedi

    That_Random_Jedi Jedi Master star 3

    May 14, 2005
    One time were dressed up as stormtroopers to filch a prisoner from an Imperial detention center, like our heroes do in ANH. Things went a little... differently.

    Other guy: *shameless quote* Where are you taking this... THING?
    Me: *another shameless quote* Prisoner transfer from cellblock 1138.
    Other guy: ...Aren't you a little feminine for a stormtrooper?
    Me: I had an accident as a child, okay?!
    *major laughter all around*
  11. mavjade

    mavjade It's so FLUFFY! Fanfic Manager star 6 Staff Member Manager

    Sep 10, 2005
    [face_laugh]LOL that was good!

    I live for throwing movie quotes into role playing!

    We were once trying to hitch a ride from a smuggler and when he asked about passengers I said
    "Myself, the wookie, two others and no questions asked."

    The GM was kind of mad at me, because the NPC was going to ask questions and when he heard what we were doing he was going to join us as a follower. Because of my "no questions asked", he had to find another way to work him in.
  12. Therren_Cragan

    Therren_Cragan Jedi Youngling star 1

    Sep 25, 2005
    Funniest thing i ever did was shoot Bossk right in the face and sent him flying out of a window on the top story of a couruscant sky scraper in one shot. first shot of the entire fight no less, and somehow he survived. i think he landed in an aircar or something.
  13. Marlin-Lazon

    Marlin-Lazon Jedi Youngling

    Jul 13, 2005
    There are a few funny moments and/or situations from my time in gaming.

    Once, in my d6 days, our scoundrel character was accosted by Gredo in th Mos Eisley canina. After being confronted by the bounty hunter, "Going somewhere, Jen-jun?" he replied, "...why don't you go after someone really important? ...Like Solo?" At that very moment, into the cantina walk Han Solo, in the cantina scenario of "A New Hope." "Very well," replied Gredo...and walked to his final destiny.

    Did you know the bartender made an intoxicating beverage out of Gredo's body? "The best tasting bounty hunter in the galaxy!"

    My 'Droid B2-401, a.k.a. "Robert Killman", is an old Baktoid Super Battle Droid. He once tore appart a protocol 'Droid, and used some of its parts to improve his own skills. He now works as a RECRUITER for the New Repubic armed forces! "Imagine, ME, designed to kill in the place of biological entities, encouraging biologcals to 'Join the Army! See the galaxy! Meet strange new and exotic species...and KILL THEM!'" He's actually pretty successful, too!

    My other 'Droid, R4-K7, was re-fitted and upgraded by my friend Jub-Jub. Jub-Jub is a Jawa Techie from Tattoine...and now R4, or "Arthur" as he prefers, is equipt with a vocabulator and a 3PO hand on a quick-release mount, (Ordered new from the company, BTW), and runs his own night-club on Coruscant, and hosts his own comedy variety show on the holonets!

    Our Sith, Gaath Dauk, a.k.a. "Darth Venge" wants to unite the Sith and Jedi orders...Dark + Light = Balance, and all that....

    We have an Ewok Jedi on the Jedi Council.... Two of our Jedi were offered a position on the council, and they had to choose between them which one would fill the position. When asked how they chose, the Ewok said, "We flipped a coin!" There was a round of shocked and horrified looks from the counselors at this, and the Ewok said, "well, it isn't like I LOST!"

    Luke Skywalker, of all people, encouraged Gaath Dauk to seek out the information that ld him to the Sith Holocron where he gained his Sith knowledge, and STILL hasn't found any reason to wipe out Gaath and his new Sith order.... "The only thing wrong with the new Jedi council is they don't even have a SITH in their ranks...!"

    We one stole a star Destroyer from the Imperial Remnant...well, mostly. There were ten of us, and we managed to get back to Coruscant with 35% of the hull intact...including the engines, most of the shield generators, half the guns.... A handful of techs and a few hundred 'Droids.......

    I have a Bothian Spy who sold his life for a million credits! He had a clone of himself activated so a bounty hunter could "Kill" him. Of course, it didn't hurt that the bounty huntr in question was part of our own group, and the bounty was over 6 million, and this gave my Bothian a chance to craft a brand new identity for his own twin brother!

    I have a Soldier/Jedi Weaponmaster/Elite Trooper working for a crime lord! "I am a Jedi...but I am first, last, and foremost a soldier."

    We have a pair of Jedi that are....well, let's just say "playful". They play practical jokes, and they once built a Dearth Vader suit and "borrowed" a red lightsaber from the Jedi temple so they could play "Sith and Jedi". They even made up a pink bunny suit for Gaath Dauk, and consructed a carrot-colored training lightsaber! (Incidentall, he didn't accept the gifts...pity.)

    Well, that's just a few of the funny situations....

    Marlin Lazon, Jedi Guardian, Jedi Ace, Jedi Artisan

  14. Nktalloth

    Nktalloth Jedi Youngling star 1

    Sep 5, 2005
    Recently (not SW, but deserves a mention), a player made a grave mistake when hiring followers. He asked me if there are any "stereotypical big axe berserker guys" up for hire. When I create a stereotype, I take it all the way...

    Zave (Player): Excuse me, gentlemen, but are you for hire?
    Berserker one: HADABACA!
    Zave: ...Um, what?
    Berserker two: He... say... he... take... mon... mon... (thinks hard) shiney.
    Zave: Hm. How Much do you want?
    Berserker three: GURU MAKKA LIT! HARRAMUCH!
    Berserker two: He say... we... want... er... (Beats his head against the table four times)
    Zave: Ah... four silver?
    Berserker one: HERRRMIT BRUK MATTA LIN!
    Berserker two: Grok... say... he... want... ... ... kitten... for-
    Zave: Yes, fine. He can have a kitten.
    Berserker two: ...SEX...

    He fired the berserkers about when they started grunting and hitting each other for entertainment, two hours later.
  15. Koohii

    Koohii Jedi Master star 5

    May 30, 2003
    Let me tell you about Zog. (pronounced Zawg) Zog is a 1/2 Orc barbarian.

    Zog has a confused history. He was different from his brothers and sisters, and most of the other children. When he asked why, he was told a story about a raid on a merchant caravan, and a captured human who was ordered to make Zog's mother happy or die. The Human failed and died. Zog not sure what this has to do with anything. Zog Father look like other orcs in tribe, except little bigger.
    Zog grow up to fight in clan wars. He good killing guy. Zog kill many bad other-tribe guys. Zog kill elfies too. Zog father get killed. Zog was sad until he found out he was only one in tribe who could wear Zog Father armor. Zog take Zog Father club too. Club name "Awuuug' s'tick". Means "elf Skul smasher", but it smash human and orc skulls too. Takes two hands to swing good.

    Zog tribe leader got mad at Zog. Tribe leader wanted to use daughter marriage as excuse to claim leaderhood of other tribe, but Zog and Tribe Leader Daughter have fun first, and ruin marriage. Zog not sure why this was important to Zog Tribe Leader, but was. Zog told to leave. Zog leave.

    Zog meet many people on road. Some attack Zog. Zog kill them with Awuuug' s'tick. Most run away. Zog not sure why they run away.

    One day, Zog find human place with lots of stone huts. Zog very excited. Zog sees many new things. Humans strange. Humans let Zog into middle of "city", but not into most "buildings". Zog see pretty girl and try to impress her traditional way. Girl run screaming. Zog not understand why. Humans in armor with pointy metal weapons show up. Lots of them. They make Zog leave "City".
    This happens many times. Sometimes Zog chased out of city, sometimes Zog locked in cave with door that does not open.

    One day, Zog being chased out of city by men in shiney armor when person who look kinda like Zog ride by on horse. He wear shiney armor with Sun symbol on it. He ask men in shiney armor what Zog done. Zog explain Zog not understand. Like-Zog asks men in armor to let Like-Zog take care of Zog, and they say "OK."
    Like-Zog say that he is knight of god of Sun. He teach Zog of rules of "Civelisashun". Zog shocked to find out he was doing bad things. He call Like-Zog "F'uffy"--It mean "Spiritual Master".

    So Zog now Civelized. He wash in water with "bubbling stone that melts and smells funny" even though he sweats regular. Sometimes he has to pay more if he forgets himself and makes more water in tub. Zog clean hide armor too, and not in same water that Zog use to clean self. Zog also not beat ZogStick to impress girls who are pretty (was way he learned in tribe). Instead he show them coins he earns working as guard. Sometimes girls like him then. Best of all, Zog not been put in cave with door that not open or chased out of town by men in shiney armor in over a year. Zog looks for way to thank F'uffy, but has to find F'uffy first. Until then, Zog talks to F'uffy by talking to neclace with F'uffy's symbol on it. Zog made symbol prettier by adding trophies from things he's killed to it so F'uffy will know that Zog is good fighter and remembers F'uffy.

    Zog has no magical items. Everything is strictly mundane (though the smells are a little exotic). He still wears the hide armor he got at first level, and weilds the 2-handed club he started with. Even when better weapons are offered to him, he sticks to what he inherited from his father. Though he has been taught the ways of civilization by the paladin that rescued him from the mob, he still has only levels in barbarian. In combat he charges the nearest opponent with full power-attack. In fact, he always uses full power-attack.
    On the surface, one would think that Zog would be of limited entertainment value. On the other hand, watching the expressions on the other gamer's faces when Zog smashed valuable treasure or turns down massive treasure is fun. Best of all is the "But it's a plus 4 sword, TAKE IT!"
    "Zog use Awuuug' s'Tick. Not need 'sword'."

    What's your backup weapon?
    Zog back up, then charge

    Range Weap
  16. DARTH_MARK-22

    DARTH_MARK-22 Jedi Youngling star 3

    Mar 11, 2003
    (Jedi Master and Padawan at a space-station casino, trying to raise enough money for passage to another planet)

    Padawan: Isn't it unethical for a Jedi to engage in gambling?
    Master: Remind me to tell you about an old friend of mine, named Qui-Gon.
  17. Ashton_Fre-Nel

    Ashton_Fre-Nel Jedi Youngling star 1

    Dec 31, 2005
    I remember a couple from my d6 days:

    1) "you (a male) awake to find yourself in a circular room, there's no windows. As you look around you notice something odd ... the whole room is pink. Pink pillows, pink walls, and even a luscious pink bed. Secondly you notice that you're tied up, sitting on a large pink cushion. Minutes later two stormtroopers walk in ..."

    2) "There's chaos all around you, blaster bolts are flying past your head. Numerous ships are lifting off and fleeing the scene and jumping into hyperspace. A Wookie suddenly jumps into hyperspace ..."

    3) (from #2 minutes later) "Your ship jumps into hyperspace ... You look out the window to your left and notice a mouse droid jumping into hyperspace ..."

    4) (during a game, out of character)
    B: Damnit, I've lost my dice again!"
    GM: "Hey T, stand up for a minute." low and behold the missing dice! T: "Sorry ... my arse is a black hole"

    From D20

    1) I created an noble NPC who had a knack for getting into mischief. While on Tatooine, while away from the PCs, he managed to get into a betting debt, owing Jabba the Hutt some 10,000 credits. I did this to try and piss the PCs off (as well as actually make them Roleplay when they spoke to eachother) -- they got me back by making me roleplay an entire conversation between the noble and his father.

    2) Same noble, same game, became known as "batha fadder" -- while chasing a space pirate the PCs went down a corridor and soon found themselves face-to-face with an E-Web. The noble recieved a critical hit and of course died instantly (cheers of joy soon followed)

    3) Another NPC, this time a soldier, a very large black man named Bubba. Bubba became very attached to our Jedi player. Bubba was known to say "You have purdy eyes", "i really likes you, would you be my special friend"; and took every chance to touch the Jedi (now Bubba wasn't gay, he just really liked Jedi). [I threaten Jedi players now with Bubba ... and if they go too far, then the pink room will be their next destination]
  18. Ashton_Fre-Nel

    Ashton_Fre-Nel Jedi Youngling star 1

    Dec 31, 2005
    Oh I forgot one from my d6 days -- had to be the funniest moment (IMO)

    I was playing a Kid. As some of you may know the kid carries a sling shot. Well, you've got to have some ammo for the sling shot so I purchased some duristeel ball bearings. Anyway. The group I was with was being chased by some woman had her goons. When she caught up to us we got involved in blaster fight which soon turned into oen-on-one. And for whatever reason the woman chose me as her combatant. Naturally I didn't stand a chance, and when she knocked me down, and stood over me, there was only one thing I could do. I shoved a ball bearing (or two) striaght between her legs (where the sun dont shine).
  19. Koohii

    Koohii Jedi Master star 5

    May 30, 2003
    I had a Kubaz who was a professional bug taster. His job was to wander arround the galaxy in quest of new delicasies to send home. Used to gross-out other members of the party with descriptions and critiques of the local insect population. "Mmmmm... crunchy. Might go well with a crushed berry sauce, once you remove the wings. Thorax is quite tasty, but the antenna are a bit bitter. Squiggles well going up the snout, but doesn't squirm very long." "Zzzzz Oooo, a blood drainer parasite. They always have the best juice sacks." This while disecting an M&M or candy bar with schlurping sounds. Only character I ever made who put points into beast riding.

    I also had an Oortolan chef who was quite fun. He would run arround sampling restraunts and wild herbs, depending on the adventure. "+1d to survival rolls involving food, from foraging in the wild to locating a 5-star restraunt" came in handy. OK, I shamelessly abused it. He was also highly skilled with knives and carried a complete set in an apron arround his waist. Even in places with strict weapon laws, he was able to get by fully armed (for him). THe things he did with a mellon scooper. <shudder>

    And the most obnoxious character I ever had was Salaicia, a Griffin Messenger with a Buffy-the-Vampire-slayer/Cordelia personality. Non-stop prattling valley-girl. I've been forbidden from ever using that accent at games again. (Not because I was good at it, just because people got that annoyed.
  20. Nktalloth

    Nktalloth Jedi Youngling star 1

    Sep 5, 2005
    Just recently-this is in WoW, not SW- I created a paladin who rolls the dice to determine what god/godess he prays to.

    This recently backfired.

    I was roleplaying healing a disease, and I rolled a trickster god, who gave me "the big knife of healing.". I proceeded to stab someone into good health.
  21. Neo-Paladin

    Neo-Paladin Jedi Master star 4

    Dec 10, 2004
    I was running a Jedi Purge era game. One character was a Padiwan named Madrik who had escaped the Purge (played by a newbie to RP?ing). In the course of the game Madrik ended up having to fight in a gladiator pit. I figure it would be a challenging encounter for a low-ish level character, but with some clever application of the Force very doable without raising eyebrows.

    Somehow the idea that he could use the Force escaped him. Three rounds of combat in he?s just about done for. Realizing the entire arc of my story is about to reach a premature end, with no way to salvage it, I look the player square in the eye and say, ?You hear a disembodied voice in your head that says, ?Use the Force, Madrik!??
    Same game ~8 sessions later, the group was on a space station that had been deserted for a few centuries. Something had messed up the central computer and all the systems and droids were malfunctioning. In reality I thought inserting a dungeon crawl sort of game into the arc would be fun, and this was my dungeon in space.

    So they fight through some encounters and come to a logic puzzle. One of the players had actually taken a logic class with me, so he in particular attacked the problem with gusto, but it still took them upwards of an hour to find the solution (with some grudgingly accepted hints from me).

    A few more encounters later they come to the last door, which is locked by a malfunctioning receptionist droid, another logic puzzle. My friend who was in the Logic class with me, looks at me, has his character pull his blaster and blow the droid away at point blank range.

    I told them it would take six hours to burn through the last door. They didn?t mind.
  22. Koohii

    Koohii Jedi Master star 5

    May 30, 2003
    Guy has been playing this foppish dilitante/cat burglar for over a year. He is the profligate prodigal son. After 17 adventures within a few day's travel of their main city, they go abroad. Being well connected, he is able to land the party in the hands of a most hospitable lord with ease that surprizes even him.
    During drinks after dinner:
    "So, I understahd you'd like to marry my daughter?"
    Player is drinking his soda manages to both snarf and spray the table. "Excuse me!?!"
    "Forgive me for being so blunt. I find it saves time and embarrasment in these matters. Your father's letter was most clear when he suggested the marriage. After dinner tonight, I so no reason to object so long as she agrees."
    "Excuse me for just a momment. I need to make a call..."
    One guy played an astromech with points in beast riding. We never did figure out why...
    "I want to hack into the bank."
    "Uh, sure. Roll it" Yeah right! this is going to need a 35.
    "22+ a 6" "And a 6" "And a 6" "and a 5. 45"
    "Hello, system administrator. How may I help you?"

    They went on to liquidate most of the large account holder's assets (anyone with more than 60k credits) in swamp land and junk stocks. And they helped themselves to 481 credits necessary to complete their current mission. Just for fun, since they were there. These are the same people who used the ship's tractor beam to create crop circles on a planet with only industrial era/steam technology, just for fun.


    For atmospheric effect, a tavern had a lighting system that rotated color spectrum every 30 seconds. When the lights shifted to ultra violet, the Defel in the party lit up like a rainbow. Caused gasps and shrieks throughout the bar.

    One guy was using a Pringles tube for a dice carrier. We'd been gaming for over an hour & debating getting some snacks when he reaches over, opens the tube on the table, and starts munching. We stare at him. "What? It's been sitting on the table all evening. No one noticed?"
  23. Neo-Paladin

    Neo-Paladin Jedi Master star 4

    Dec 10, 2004
    gotta love that wild die. o_O
  24. Rogue_Thunder

    Rogue_Thunder FanForce CR, Edmonton, Alberta, Canada star 6

    Jan 7, 2003

    How would he even hold on? [face_thinking]
  25. Nktalloth

    Nktalloth Jedi Youngling star 1

    Sep 5, 2005
    You'd be surprised. Those little freaks are like a Swiss army Knife of +2 everything. It'd probably use claws secreted in the treads to dig into the beasts skin, causing it to hold on and the beast to move.

    That, or magnetism. Magnetism can solve anything.

    Just call me Alex Chiu...
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