Before After It Ended (JA/Q/O,angst)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by female_obi_wan, Apr 28, 2003.

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  1. female_obi_wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 1, 2002
    star 3
    Title subject to change...anyone think of a better one? ;)

    This fic is probably very confusing, like I'm sure a lot of them are. ;) Oh well. It wasn't meant to have a lot of plot anyway...Basically, Qui turned to the Dark Side after Tahl died and left, thus making Obi get sent away to the Agricorps. And now they've met up again, purely by chance, and have been trapped my some villain in a building that happens to be on fire. Yes I will try and write that in a proper story someday. :D

    Anyway...



    I sit upon the stones alone;
    The fire is burning red,
    the tower is tall, the mountains dark;
    all living things are dead.
    In western lands the sun may shine,
    there flower and tree in spring
    is opening, is blossoming;
    and there the finches sing.

    But here I sit alone and think
    of days when grass was green,
    and earth was brown, and I was young:
    they might have never been.
    For they are past, forever lost,
    and here the shadows lie
    deep upon my heavy heart,
    and hope and daylight die.

    But still I sit and think of you;
    I see you far away
    Walking down the homely roads
    on a bright and windy day.
    It was merry then when I could run
    to answer to your call,
    could hear your voice or take your hand;
    but now the night must fall.
    And now beyond the world I sit,
    and know not where you lie!
    O master dear, will you not hear
    my voice before we die?
    ~J.R.R. Tolkien



    After It Ended


    The light had been the end.

    A flash of green light in a dark room and an enemy slumping lifeless to the ground. That had been the end. Darkness had come and he'd been powerless to stop it taking him. He'd been too blinded and too weak to stop it.

    All the light had gone when Tahl's killer had fallen. All the light lost to revenge. Tahl was gone. Xanatos had gone years ago.

    A shaking voice from behind him: "Master?"

    All the lights-except one.

    But the Dark was inside him now, laughing gleefully at any weakness he had ever had, any thought, any doubt, turning his mind upside down.

    -You're his enemy now. He will hate you. Kill him while you have the chance.-

    [No!]

    -You have nothing left to live for! Your life has ended. Put the child out of his misery.-

    [You can't...]

    -Isn't there a chance he will turn to the Dark Side now? Like Xanatos? Better to kill him then to have him fail-

    [No! He'll never turn, nothing would make him evil....]

    -You've failed him too.-


    There was no sound but panicked breathing.


    "Master...?"

    Qui-Gon turned around, the green light shining sickingly.

    "Is that the only word you can say?"

    [That's not my voice...]

    -It is, it is, it is.-

    "Master," Obi-Wan said, eyes wide and desperate. "You-"

    "He murdered Tahl!" Qui-Gon screamed. "Do you value her life less than that of-this?!" He gestured wildly at the body.

    "I...."

    "Silence!" And he hit Obi-Wan on the arm, with the lightsabre. And the power of the Force- not his Force, not the one
    he'd just rejected...

    [Two things I love I just rejected!]

    -the Dark Side of the Force sent the boy crashing back into the wall.

    The crash did not bring him back. It only made him see through the blackness.

    "Padawan!"

    Obi-Wan looked up, whispered "Master." and then a pair of hands grabbed him. It was Mace.



    There hadn't been a day of his life when he wished that something...anything...could have stopped him doing what he did. He'd rather, much rather, have died that day.

    And then he'd decided that he had, and should stop thinking about it. That lost him his soul, as well as his life. Or had he lost his soul a long time ago, too?

    He hadn't completely ruled out the possibility that Obi-Wan had killed him, and sent him to hell. If any place in the galaxy could pass for hell, this was certainly it. Even more so now. Fire was slowly reducing the beautiful- but oh so fake-furniture to dust, licking at the painting on the wall, licking at him, straving hungry...and Obi-Wan Kenobi was glaring at him.

    Qui-Gon couldn't quite find i
  2. InTheSockOfTheNight Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 31, 2002
    star 3
    Interesting little viggies FOW. Master Buckethead Qui was actually making me feel a little :_| at the end...and that is not normal!

    Keep up the writing!
  3. Obi the Kid Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 13, 2000
    star 4
    Ah, just what I needed today. A little angst. Nice job, FOW. I esp like the ending. Very sad.

    Obi
  4. Arwen-Jade_Kenobi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2002
    star 5
    Great job there! Loved it, fulfilled the daily dose of angst!
  5. Lurkalidth Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2003
    star 2
    Interesting story! Very interesting...

    So I'm confused, lol! I'm guessing the fire in the village is supposed to be symbolic of something. If so, what? Please? I'm very curious. Right now I'm guessing that the village is the galaxy, and Qui-Gon has wrought its destruction (the spreading fire) by his post-Tahl's-demise actions.

    I would greatly appreciate if you were to explain though. It's like an itch I can't scratch.

    Thanks for sharing something that made me think. :D
  6. Hananiah Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 15, 2003
    star 4

    This is sooo sad! Oh poor qui and Obi at least they made up sort of this is great litte viggie
  7. female_obi_wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 1, 2002
    star 3
    InTheSockOfTheNight: He's not a buckethead all the time. ;) Thanks for reading!

    Obi the Kid: Thanks!

    Arwen-Jade_Kenobi: Thanks to you too! :D

    Lurkalidth: Thanks for reading...hmmm. When I wrote it the fire wasn't really meant to represent anything, except hell, maybe, but your idea of the village being the galaxy is a really good one. :) Like I said, I'll write the backstory to this one day. :)

    Hananiah: Thanks for reading! :)
  8. Padawan_Jess_Kenobi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 20, 2002
    star 4
    :D That was awesome!! So sad, though. And the end just made me tear up. Great job!! :D
  9. Lurkalidth Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2003
    star 2
    female obi wan--

    Hi! I hope you *do* write the backstory for this; it would be smashing. :D

    One question, though, please, if you would indulge the curiosity of a pathetic life form? ;) If you envisioned the flames as being H_ll, then was Obi really there? Or was Qui-Gon hallucinating?

    Thank you.
  10. female_obi_wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 1, 2002
    star 3
    Yes, I think he was there. :)

    The prequel to this might have to wait, I'm afraid, because I'm working on my original story, plus my current fanfic and it's sequals...still I'll see what I can do. :D
  11. female_obi_wan Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 1, 2002
    star 3
    I want to thank Happy_Hobbit_Padawan for nominating this for Best Pre-Saga Story ? Completed. *hugs*
  12. Happy_Hobbit_Padawan Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 3, 2003
    star 4
    [face_shocked] I just realized that I haven't yet actually replied to this vignette! [face_blush] [face_blush]

    Well, as you probably already guessed, I like this story a lot. :) Very sad and tragic how each of their lives were completely changed by Qui-Gon's decision years ago. Interesting idea to have them tossed together to deal with each other (I would love very much to see the back story to this viggie written! :D), and facing certain death. The ending, where Qui gives Obi his saber and braid, and the Force returns to him for the last time, well, it just made me want to :_|.

    Great viggie. :D
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