Ahalik Gorena- a JA fic

Nice story!

I like the timeline!

Strange title, though. I like "Two guys, a girl, and a Sith".

Cool new characters...they're very well developed.



[This message has been edited by Jedi Master Mara Jade (edited 06-13-2000).]

 

You hardly need me to tell you that I'm still reading. But I will anyway.....I know exacctly how Bakada feels. OWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!! sore muscles too much dancing is not good.

See ya
Kit'

 

POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PUH-LLLLLLLEEEEEEZZZZ!!!!

THIS IS SO TOTALY COOOOOL!!!!
TOO MANY CAPITAL LETTERS!!!!
AND TOO MANY EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!

(dead)

you killed me.

now post!!!

 

If you beg, they will come.

Yaay! Thanks you guys. There'll be plenty of fight scenes, but they'll be kind of... weird... because I actually studied martial arts for a while. Not enough to get good at it, but enough to be driven nuts by the way duels are depicted 3/4 of the time because they're so messed up.

 

i've said it before and I'll say it again I love this... you are getting soo good at making people hang on for that next bit of info... I'm hanging on.....

 

bmilder, I go into the depths of the forums all the time, and that's how I find old threads (and of course, I also find some of them by using the indexes). I actually don't have any threads bookmarked.

 

So I guess speculations are okay as long as I'm not sure that it's true and it's not about the plot.

 

Just wanted to say... Great story Hiroko! How much longer do we have to wait for the next installment??
Keep it up!

 

I'm still reading this and hanging on your every word...

 

Three hours later....

Qui-Gon was cornered with the ball, looking quickly between the two opposing teammates coming in at him. He decided to take the high route.

A deep thud echoed through the hall as he kicked the ball, shortly followed by another as it shot up and slammed into the ceiling. A mad scramble took place to get in position as it bounced out of the
rafters.

The woman with black cottony hair? Solna? leaped up and bounced it off her shoulder towards Dresang, the Padawan. Obi-Wan promptly sacked her, leaving the ball unguarded for Bakada to sweep up.

Too bad the bald man, Karrim, had other ideas. ?Block me!? he yelled, and Bakada searched quickly around for whoever was about to tackle her. It was Solna, coming in from about five o?clock.

Qui-Gon! Ball! Bakada passed it to him and reversed direction to make sure Solna stayed out of his way. Stealing the ball away before Karrim got it, Qui-Gon ran with it towards their goal-end of the hall.

Hey! Bakada! A wordless imperative lit into her mind, like a mental finger pointing to where she should go. Without a thought, she switched direction again to receive the pass.

Dresang charged up in front of her? Bakada wouldn?t be able to get around her fast enough.

Obi-Wan? You might have to? Karrim was about to get the ball again? Qui-Gon had no choice but to send it to her now. Dresang stopped the ball on her knee and danced around it while she lined up her shot, and made a kick that skidded it over to Solna. The Knight dribbled it into their territory where Obi-Wan was taking his turn defending.

Obi-Wan charged into her way and forced her to slow down. Slowing, she tried to nudge the ball to go around him, but Qui-Gon swept in and stole it. Solna came back quickly after Qui-Gon to tackle him. The Master punted the ball back at Obi-Wan and Bakada lit across the hall with eerie speed.

Here! she volunteered. From the opposite corner of the hall, the ball boomed in at her on a high arc. At the peak of its first bounce off the floor, she caught it on her forehead and ricocheted it into the goal.

?Scratch ten, match over,? Solna spat disgustedly from beside her. The Knight had been just late to stop the winning point. Her two teammates gathered alongside her, and Bakada?s beside herself.

?Thanks for the game,? Bakada attempted, bowing to Solna.

?Thanks for the warmup,? the older woman smirked. ?May the Force be with you, all.? With that, the other team bowed and exited the hall, breathing hard and damp with sweat.

Obi-Wan took the opportunity as he stretched to have a good, long think.

Bakada. She was going to be a very important part of life from now on, so he?d better figure out what he thought about her.

He did like her. Her round, flat-nosed face always seemed regretful, as if she were mulling over some private distress. When he said something to her, he felt like he was intruding on whatever it was? but the sad expression was just the way her face was built. Once she woke from whatever she meditated upon (that was another part of what made her look like as if troubled? she always seemed to be reflecting on something), her brown eyes held a playful glitter. And some wisdom, too. There?d always been intelligence behind those wide dark eyes, but it hadn?t stuck out at him until she started talking about those... unique... beliefs she held.

Sla-Nedh. Now there was something to ponder. Already his mind was starting to test it, run things through its formula, follow its tendrils of implication. It checked out.

It?d take some getting used to, that was for sure. The unaccustomed directions these new ideas took his thoughts, the strange tangent curves and the sudden and anticlimactic groundings, were threatening to give him a headache. He wanted to learn more of this, that was a certain thing.

And yet... he had a bond with Qui-Gon that was his personal ground, his home turf? and she was walking her merry way in without so much as a ?by your leave.? And he didn?t like it.

Of course she treated it so matter-of-factly

 

Interesting I'm not a hat/scarf/headgear person myself....why does she always wear it?

Good job Waiting for more

 

It's just a cultural thing, sort of like a babushka. I have a head-scarf myself that I've grown really attached to. People find me in crowds by looking for the red scarf.

Happy birthday to Lwyn'nya! Here's your present, dear heart. Enjoy.

******************

?Took you long enough,? he jibed, recovering quickly. They took cautious stances facing each other, both prepared to take an instant move in this keep-away game. Bakada?s eyes locked on his Padawan braid dangling and twisting in front of his shoulder and got the sudden urge to just grab him by it and get her rag back. No... that wouldn?t be nice.

?Sorry, I had to stop by my room and change on my way here,? she answered with a sarcastically conversational tone, and made a sudden dart for the cloth. Obi-Wan spun away to avoid her reach. For many long seconds, they faced off again.

Obi-Wan leapt off to the right and Bakada was quick to follow. Unfortunately for her, though, it was a fake? and he jerked left and was off back the way they came.

How could I have missed that? Argh! Growling, hair flying nakedly behind her, Bakada ran after him.

It didn?t take too long to catch up with him again. Deciding it might be wiser not to slow down this time, Bakada pushed faster as she neared and rammed into him, pinning his arm between her elbow and side.

?Come on, you can do better than that!? he scolded, laughing. He whirled away again and suddenly wrapped her up in one arm, pulling her off the ground. The move ensured that she?d not reach the scarf, for it was kept safely in the other hand.

?Ack? bugger, hey!? Bakada squawked, and started to squirm furiously. Not just wriggle, Obi-Wan realized, but to actually climb over him.

?Careful there, Bakada, I don?t want to drop you,? he warned. Just to be safe, he carried his wiggling burden towards the friendly support of a wall.

?You started this? y? sot? it?ll be your fault!? she grunted in reply, reaching for his arm. Her knees were jammed into the crook of his elbow, and her right arm was wrestling his left in so her free hand could claim the prize. Somehow the rest of her body had managed to wrap itself around his shoulders.

Not for long, though? she suddenly let his arm go and instead jabbed her fingers into his side. Wickedly, with no thought of mercy, Bakada proceeded to... tickle.

?Ah-ha! You?re goin? down now!? she shouted victoriously. Startled, Obi-Wan?s body curled into the offended side.

That was the death knell for his balance. With a yelp, they both tumbled to the ground.

Obi-Wan rolled one way and Bakada skidded in another. The gap was small, though, and Bakada lunged across it while Obi-Wan was still on his knees. Latching onto Obi-Wan?s closed fist and a tuft of fabric hanging from it, she finally gained some real ground.

?Le? go a? me lucky dewrag!? Obi-Wan demanded, imitating her accent. He was not happy about having his prize threatened. To improve his leverage, he shifted into a more solid stance and dug his knees in.

?No! It is mine!? Bakada exclaimed, cackling, and hooked a foot into his right leg, trying to dislodge him from his stance. Half-sitting in front of him and to his right, all of her leverage came from her right leg sapping his out? and suddenly she got a big push of it. She gave a final pull on his arm and leaned him forward, prying his knee loose just enough to let the force of her foot knock it out from under him and sending him flying forward. With her grabbing onto his arms, she pulled him right on top of her.

?Mine!? she reaffirmed, glaring fiercely into his eyes- and then, suddenly, something went wrong.

Bakada?s body under him seized. All her struggling stopped completely and was replaced by a violent shaking as her pupils snapped shut. Most alarming of all, her sense was falling away, falling, dropping out the bottom like something hurled off the edge of a cliff.

?Bakada, are you alright?? Obi-Wan lifted off carefully, afraid he had somehow hurt her. Oh Force, how could I?

The next thing he remembered was waking up

 

Call me stupid but Huh?

Okay I got it and then?????? Okay now the waiting game has started I can feel it.

Please Hiroko, don't make me wait. If I wait too long I get into a really bad mood and you don't want to see me in a bad mood.

see ya
Kit'

(p.s. would you e-mail me please?)

 

what the....??


WHAT HAPPENED TO HER!?

 

HUH????? Hiroko, what just happened??? Please post soon!!

 

ohh this is sooooooo good can't wait for more!

 

That is some good writting there... I'm looking forward to more

 

Um, Hiroko?

I know you have stressed out fingers from playing your instruments but please? Take a break from the music girl and write!!!!!

See ya
Kit

 

Wow!!!!

Nicely done!!!!

*wipes a proud tear from her eye* It's so nice to see that others are finally coming over to the cliffhanger side of the Force!

Such a wonderful birthday gift, thank you!

 

This story keeps getting better and better!

 

Nice Work

 

Uh Hiroko?

Just moving this up while I wait.

see ya
Kit

 

Well, the musical's finally over, but then my dad took the power cord to our computer until we get the bushes all trimmed and the lawn mowed. It might be a day or two before I can even start writing again.

hehe. What fortuitous timing, eh?

 

Okay, Hiroko, I told you I'd come here- and I did. I just want you to know I went through with my promise.

That said,

THIS STORY KICKS MAJOR BUTT!!!!!!

please please please post more.... soooooooooon. Keep up the excellent work!

--Mara Jade

 

*Master Peael wakes up from her feverish nightmares and drags herself out of bed and to the computer to check on all her stories that she loves .... but finds none and can do nothing more then cough on the screen and go back to bed......*

poor me I'm sick tonight and was sooooo looking forward to reading some updates... oh well ... untill tomorrow I guess..... sigh