All bask in the glory that is me!

Well, I've done it.

As some of you know, I am a slacker. So much so to the point that while I am at work, I do nothing more than play on the computer and read.

I have been working on The Hobbit while at work, yet could not ever seem to make progress. People keep bothering me with foolishness. I know they need help and I am being paid to help them, but can't they see I was trying to read?

The Swine.

It came down to this. Everytime I would get into the book, some lowlife scumbag would interrupt. I would have to put my book down, deal with the pathetic waste of flesh, and then go back to my book. By that point I would have to pick up my book, and having forgotten what point I was at, have to start all over.

It was a case of two steps forward, one step back.

But today, I just put my feet up and started where I had left off yesterday. And no one bothered me. I was able to read the last 100 or so pages uninterrupted.

I feel like a million bucks right now.

So go ahead and praise me. I just finished The Hobbit.

Good night and God bleass.

 

yipee

 

*basks in glory.*

 

Good for you. Now put on a pot of gourmet coffee and start on Fellowship. At home, not when customers are around.

a_g (who needs to start reading Two Towers herself )

 

See, I've gotten the old wheels turning and have finally found a way to keep from dealing with the "customers" (I hate them all. If only I could work and never deal with them).

Henceforth, everytime one of the worthless piles of flesh come to ma and ask me for anything, my response shall always be the same.

"I don't speak English."

I will of course say it in perfect English, but that is the beauty of it.

 

LOL!

I gave this to my husband in the old non-glory days, when he was working retail: "The customer is always right--and usually ugly too."

a_g

(Je ne parle pas anglais.
No hablo inglés.
Ich spreche nicht Englisch.)

 

While I was temping over the summer I read the whole of The Lord of the Rings during the course of a week while I was supposed to be working. Not bad eh?

 

Customer: Can you help me?
Slacker: [Without looking up from his book] I don't speak English.
Customer: But you just did.
Slacker: I don't speak English.
Customer: Look, pal, I've had just about enough of you.
Slacker: I told you, I don't speak English.
Customer: I want to talk to your supervisor right now.
Slacker: I don't speak English. Now get the hell away from me before I beat you with your own shoe!
Customer: [As he storms away]! Well up yours!
Slacker: [Without looking up from book] Next.

 

ROTFLOL! So, you're him!

 

can some one point me to where I can find out what all these acronyms stand for?

 

Customer: Can you help me?
Slacker: [Without looking up from his book] I don't speak English.
Customer: But you just did.
Slacker: I don't speak English.
Customer: Look, pal, I've had just about enough of you.
Slacker: I told you, I don't speak English.
Customer: I want to talk to your supervisor right now.
Slacker: I don't speak English. Now get the hell away from me before I beat you with your own shoe!
Customer: [As he storms away]! Well up yours!
Slacker: [Without looking up from book] Next.

Pure Dom Joly...

 

Pure Dom Joly?

Is that some English phrase?

 

I read Tolstoy's "War & Peace" while I was at work earlier this year. I am not pulling your leg, or yanking your chain or any other of those phrases that sound like an innuendo for riding a donkey down a hill.

 

So, Precious, what did you think of The Hobbit?

 

Well My Precious, I liked it for the most part. It seemed kind of rushed at the end though. That and I never quite understood why Bilbo gave the Heart of the Mountian jewel to Bard, but it was pretty good over all.

 

*basks in glory*

now, is there a fanclub we can join? cuz your accomplishment has astounded me!

 

Do fanclub members get special offers and bonuses? Is there a secret code we would use (Drink more ovaltine! ) ???

 

As a matter of fact there is a fanclub.

Just send twenty dollars cash (US currency only please) to me and you will be a part of the Official Just A Slacker Fanclub.

You get:
A membership card, good for discounts at many fine establishments
A quartely newsletter keeping you up to date on all my lates developments
A 36x48 inch poster of me
And a patch for your jacket.

YOu also get discounts at my online store.

Can I sign you up?

 

I'll offer you 20 credits I have in the RP forum....

Error: Only 1 message post per minute is allowed.

 

sure!! and cuz I procrastiante, I'll send you an I.O.U. at some point... and some day I might send you a fake check!

 

I didn't think about using an IOU or a fake check *kicks self* I can use one of those systems of payment if ya want though. *nods sagely*

 

I also accept U.S.P.S. stamps. I've also been known to barter for membership in my fanclub.

What do you have for trade

 

ummmm.....


I know!!

you can have a membership in my fanclub if I can have membership in yours!!

 

I should make one of those *shrugs* maybe tomorrow.... I can give you one of my sock's passwords, is that good enough?

 

Tabee, it's a deal
Aragorn, it's a deal

See, wasn;t that easy.

Of course now I need to write my newsletter...