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Saga All in a Day's Work (ARC, Omega/Delta) - Update 12/29 Chapter 67

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Kudzu, Aug 12, 2005.

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  1. Kudzu

    Kudzu Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jun 18, 2005
    Shut up and write! :p
     
  2. Antilles2001

    Antilles2001 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 20, 2001
    Make me!





    Oh, wait...
     
  3. Antilles2001

    Antilles2001 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 20, 2001
    Chapter 6
    By Antilles2001

    ?It?s just your imagination, son,? Asap sighed for the fifth time. His son kept insisting that there was a white-armored man moving around outside.

    ?Oh?alright, Father,? Yucky said grumpily.

    ?Get some rest. Our shift will begin in a few hours.?

    King Asap?s daughter, Vespa, walked into the cottage with a few other female slave miners. An equal number of miners got up from their cots and headed out to replace them as they were given a moment of rest.

    Vespa was almost sixteen, so she was to be the heir to King Asap III. Despite the dirt that caked her face and her disheveled hair, she was still quite pretty. However, even though she was outwardly beautiful, she was the epitome of a spoiled brat. Fortunately, hard labor in the mine tunnels of Depudus had taught the once rich princess that her former status as royalty meant nothing.

    ?Daddy?I hate it here. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it?? she said in a particularly whiny voice.

    ?I know, Vespa, I know. Everyone does.?

    ?Well, what are we going to do about it then??

    ?We can?t. Our only hope is if someone comes to save us,? the deposed monarch said quietly.

    ?Oh please, Father. Two weeks and nobody has done anything. I don?t want to rot and die here!?

    Young Yucky kept his gaze on the window. ?Pessimism is for the weak.?

    ?Optimism is for the naïve!? his sister snapped back.

    ?Now, now,? the King started. The last thing he needed was his two children to be arguing. ?You shouldn?t - wait. Is that???

    The chaotic sound of blaster fire erupted from the mess hall. Then it suddenly stopped.

    * * * * *

    ?Alright, form up around the entrance!?

    Ten armed guards took positions a few meters from the entrance to the mess hall. They had recently heard blaster fire inside. That only meant one thing: the Republic had finally come.

    ?Stand fast, men!? the team leader shouted.

    The ten guards waited, sweat starting to form around the grips of their weapons. Protocol stated that in the case of an ambush, survivors would immediately report in with any reinforcements that arrive. None came through the doors of the mess hall.

    Without warning, luminescent blue bolts blasted through the closed mess hall doors, ripping apart the team of armed guards. The myriad of holes in the doors were still cooling to a dull red as they opened to reveal a Republic Advance Recon Commando. Wisps of smoke curled from the end of his rifle?s barrel.

    With the element of surprise gone, there was no point in stealth tactics anymore. He reached into his bandolier and took out the small detonator wired to the bomb inside the command center. He ran to the side of the mess hall for cover.

    ?Boom.?

    He firmly pressed his finger on the small red button. There was a muffled bang within the building, quickly followed by a chain reaction of smaller explosions that tore it apart from the inside. After a long string of secondary blasts, the command center ungracefully toppled to the ground, reduced nothing but a pile of rubble.

    ?Fear,? he whispered to himself as he slammed a fresh clip into his rifle. ?And chaos.?

    * * * * *

    It was pure pandemonium in the penal colony. Guards were speaking into their radios and getting nothing but static as the slave miners ran about, screaming. One thought this was finally his chance at salvation. He snatched a sharp piece of crystal off a mining cart.

    ?Come on! This is our chance! Follow me -?

    The passionate ex-miner was promptly shot in the face. He fell to the rocky ground. His crude weapon was still clutched in his lifeless hands.

    The guard aimed his blaster pistol at the mob of miners, who all stopped running in unison and now stood there in terrified silence.

    ?Anyone still want to follow him??

    * * * * *

    Okay, bulk of the opposition?s dead, A-51 thought. Clean out the barracks, then. He picked the closest one and stepped up to the door. With a well-placed kick from his armored boot, it fell open without much effort.

    Fifteen guards inside, all still
     
  4. Kudzu

    Kudzu Jedi Knight star 5

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    Jun 18, 2005
    Have you dispatched PMs to our readers, Antilles?
     
  5. Aiden_Sanic

    Aiden_Sanic Jedi Youngling star 3

    Registered:
    Jun 25, 2005

    Wow Antilles, You characterize A-51 so well, I'm begining to see him as an actual character rather than an OC, why couldn't he be in the novels? [face_thinking]


    And you gotta love his lines...

    ?Fear,? he whispered to himself as he slammed a fresh clip into his rifle. ?And chaos.?


    Creepy, yet satisfying... =D=


    Fifteen guards inside, all still laying on their cots, raised their hands in the air.

    ?We surrender!? one of them yelled.

    ?Famous last words.? He lifted his rifle and squeezed down on the trigger.



    [face_laugh] Nothing like a little dark humor to make you smile..... like ME!

    :D


    Keep it up you two, this is a really really good story. =D=
     
  6. Antilles2001

    Antilles2001 Jedi Padawan star 4

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    Oct 20, 2001
    I thought you were the one who did that? Well, I'll do it anyway. :p
     
  7. Antilles2001

    Antilles2001 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 20, 2001
    Thanks. :)

    A-51 isn't my OC, it's Kudzu's. If you've read his other work, he was orignally in the Order 66 vignette "No".

    I figured we should have as many references to his/my other work as possible. :p
     
  8. Kudzu

    Kudzu Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jun 18, 2005
    He's also in "Yes Instead", which is an AU of "No". If I reference the events of "No" in a later fanfiction, they'll be as what happened in "No", not "Yes Instead". But it's still a good read ;) The beginnings of each are the same up until Order 66 is issued.
     
  9. Ceethreepio

    Ceethreepio Jedi Knight star 5

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    Mar 4, 2003
    Ceethreepio: I'm trying to give him a different feel than Grievous; is it working? prayingIts workin, don't worry about that.

    Nice work Mig, keep up the fear and chaos and I will give you five bucks.
     
  10. Antilles2001

    Antilles2001 Jedi Padawan star 4

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    Oct 20, 2001
    How tactful. :p
     
  11. Antilles2001

    Antilles2001 Jedi Padawan star 4

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    Oct 20, 2001
    I'm just a simple man trying to make my way in the universe.
     
  12. oqidaun

    oqidaun Manager Emeritus star 5 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Registered:
    Jul 20, 2005

    It was pure pandemonium in the penal colony.

    That is high quality alliteration!

    Great work, as usual.


    and "oughta" what? :p
     
  13. Peagis

    Peagis Jedi Youngling star 3

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    Apr 14, 2005
    LOL !
     
  14. Antilles2001

    Antilles2001 Jedi Padawan star 4

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    Oct 20, 2001
    Thanks.

    *puts blaster back under computer desk*

    Oh, nothing at all.
     
  15. Antilles2001

    Antilles2001 Jedi Padawan star 4

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    Oct 20, 2001
    Feet First Into Hell!
     
  16. Krayus_Korianis

    Krayus_Korianis Jedi Master star 1

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    Jul 22, 2005
    Wow, good post.
     
  17. Antilles2001

    Antilles2001 Jedi Padawan star 4

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    Oct 20, 2001
    Thank you for your amazing feedback. :p
     
  18. Exeter

    Exeter Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Feb 2, 2005
    I just got myself caught up on this story - it's excellent! A-51 is too much of a badass not to like. And Necrosis, well, let's just say he's one bad dude, er, droid, er cyborg :p

    Keep up the great work!
     
  19. Antilles2001

    Antilles2001 Jedi Padawan star 4

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    Oct 20, 2001
    Thanks. He is quite the badass, isn't he? :p
     
  20. Corran_Fett

    Corran_Fett Jedi Padawan star 4

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    Jan 17, 2005
    WOW... you have done very well (so far :p ), Antilles and Kudzu! =D=

    When Antilles told me, you both are writing a co-op fic, I knew i would get great... but I didn't think it would be that great! :D

    Please put me on the PM-list as well... at least till I get back to my PC and MSN and ICQ... (what should be in at least 5 days or so)...

    Now, my critiques:

    I love A-51... he is very Sam Fisher like... only thing to mention: only 6 of 100 ARCs were personally trained by Jango Fett (Alpha, Spar are yet known)... the other 94 a bit by Jango and a bit by others (Cuy Val Dar).

    Then Kudzu: I read several of your fics, and in some you mentioned he Lucid Voice. Now, my question is, are the Lucid Voice and N-K Necrosis canon or your imagination (if latter: good idea with the Voice, but I think Necrosis is a bit... err... weird)
    Just tell me your sources to both this stuff :)

    Also, nice to see Silver-Three from your (Kudzu's) "Republic Pilot"-fic are in the char-list. Can't wait to see your guys in action again... but: When Kit (or Bant) gets told what kind of infantry and troops come on that mission, I see no ARC-170 Fighters... so tell me what this is about, please...


    But anyway, keep the great stuff up, fellas! ;)

    btw, in my vacation, I wrote a little ARC-trooper fic (in German) with an rogue ARC called A-51 Jaing... well, I didn't know that Kudzu had a A-51 as well, so I think I gotta change that number... anyway, I just need to translate it and put it up...
    I guess at least in a week you can get my third Clone-fic *g* - for those who haven't read the other two, be sure to check my profile with links to them... I'd appreciate some more comments from clone-fans :)
     
  21. Antilles2001

    Antilles2001 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Oct 20, 2001
    We're rtying cram as many references to our other pieces as possible into this. :p (ie Triple from Republic Pilot, A-51 from his "No" Order 66 vignette, etc. Seeing as I never written OCs before, I have to be a bit more creaitve. :p

    But thanks for your comments, bud. I really appreciate the fact that your feedback actually has more than one sentence. :)
     
  22. Kudzu

    Kudzu Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jun 18, 2005
    Lucid Voice is from ICS:RotS and N-K "Necrosis" is from SWG:RotW. And I'm fairly certain that all of the ARCs (at least the original 100, anyway) were hand-trained by Jango Fett. :)
     
  23. Antilles2001

    Antilles2001 Jedi Padawan star 4

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    Oct 20, 2001
    Nobody here has seen Spaceballs?
     
  24. Corran_Fett

    Corran_Fett Jedi Padawan star 4

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    Jan 17, 2005
    Ah... well, thx for that info.

    But the part with Jango and ARCs... I'm very, very convinced that only 6 ARCs where personally (and only personally) trained by Jango himself... I can't tell you the excact source, but anywhere in the last 10 or 15 pages of the Official ARC Thread (what you know quite well *g*) it was mentioned... best thing to do is asking Ryan :)


    And no problem, Antilles. I have this commenting problem in my other fic, fanart and icon-making (I know, quite a lot stuff I have here [face_blush] ) threads, and it's really enerving when only comments like "WOW" or "Good job" come... I want some critiques! :D

    I instead have only OCs in my fics... yet :D. I had an idea to write Sev's fate after he got MIA on Kashyyyk, but I'm not sure if it's necessary, since I think we will soon have an official statement on that by Ryan or so... I think he indicated anything like that...

    anyway, I hope to see new chapters, soon... :cool:

    btw, I know Spaceballs, for sure. What are you driving at, dude?

    EDIT: How silly.. when I first read the char sheet and I saw Princess Vespa, my first thought was Spaceballs... then I somehow forgot it, and even your reminder didn't help o_O... [face_blush]

    I'm not certain with the other Aceplians, but I don't think Asap is from Spaceballs, too... but tell me if I'm wrong
     
  25. Kudzu

    Kudzu Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Jun 18, 2005
    Asap isn't from Spaceballs ;) His name and Eicig's name (you'll see more of him in Chapter 8) are inside jokes. We can't tell you what they mean, or we'd have to kill you. That would be a tragedy. A-51 coming to your house and everything. Man, it just wouldn't be pretty. ;)

    Moving on to something else...

    Hear ye, hear ye, fair readers of this fanfiction!

    From an hour from now until next Monday, I will be on vacation! I will have Internet access for most of Sunday if all goes as planned; otherwise I'm technology-deprived.

    I therefore vote to give Antilles2001 emergency powers to post Chapter 7 when he's done with it without running it by me (because I won't be here to reply) and ask a mod to edit the main post to say "Update Chapter 7, Month/Date". Hope you enjoy that, and Antilles? Make it kick - erm, *reads ToS* - butt.
     
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