Before An Altered Myth (JA)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by KenobisGirl, Nov 3, 2003.

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  1. KenobisGirl Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 10, 2001
    star 4
    Yeah, it's been awhile since I've written anything, and I actually was forced to write this one. It was an English assignment, and that's why it's relatively short. My teacher would have shot me if it had been longer.

    Title: An Altered Myth
    Author(s): KenobisGirl
    Timeframe: JA, Obi-Wan is 14
    Characters: Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon, characters from Homer's Iliad
    Genre: Adventure
    Keywords: JA, Obi, Qui
    Summary: Two strangers land on Earth in the middle of the Trojan war and inadvertently alter a well-known epic.
    Notes: This is a crossover between The Iliad by Homer and SW. I think you may be able to get the gist of it without having read Homer's epic.


    ***

    ?I will show them. I am better than any of those fools out on the battlefield. How dare Agamemnon steal my war prize? I deserve it more than he,? Achilles muttered to himself, as he paced around the interior of his tent. ?Besides, I deserve a respite.? He turned to Patroklos, his best friend and closest confidant. ?How long has this war been going on, anyway??

    ?Almost ten years, Achilles. And it?s been a long ten years, that much is true.?

    ?Yes. So a respite has been long overdue.? Both men strode out of the tent and into the fading daylight. The camp of the Achaeans stretched as far as the eye could see; a great, white sea of tents, which housed the Greek army.

    ?I do not see why Agamemnon is being so obstinate about all this,? Achilles said, grabbing a piece of bread as they went by a table filled with rations. ?If he would only apologize and return my woman-slave, I would return to the fighting. He does not understand that his men are losing their lives without me.?

    ?Perhaps he does not want to admit he is wrong?? Patroklos ventured. Achilles gave a short laugh.

    ?That is just like him. He is too arrogant to accept the inevitable truth.?

    Both warriors continued walking down the long rows of tents, but suddenly stopped as an ear-splitting sound thundered in the darkening sky. The noise continued to get louder, as both Trojans and Greeks ran for cover, frightened and thinking the gods were choosing to end their existence with one enormous burst of fire and sound. Some
    unworldly thing streaked across the sky, a tail of flame engulfing it, before the ground shook with its impact.

    Achilles stood before the crash, mouth hanging open with barely-contained shock. Patroklos was by his side, staring at the object that had shattered the relatively peaceful lull of the bloody war.

    ?What is going on here?? the urgent voice of Agamemnon came up behind them and snapped them from their stupor. Before they could answer, a small door on the object opened, and a man stepped out, his dark brown cloak billowing around him with the wind. His face looked tired, and blood matted his long hair to the side of his head.

    ?Please, you have to help my student, he is injured,? the man?s voice was desperate, and it acted as a catalyst that spurred Agamemnon?s men into action. Patroklos walked slowly to the thing that had fallen to the sky, and after the foreign man nodded his gratitude, followed him into the belly of the thing.

    Once inside, everything was as dark and as quite as a tomb, with the exception of a few small electrical fires and sparks. Patroklos gazed around in wonder. He had never seen something like this before, and he was amazed at the advanced technology. This thing had fallen from the sky, so the visitors must have come from the sky as well. He wondered if perhaps the gods on Olympus had had something to do with the crash, but he doubted it. This amazing display of technology was definitely beyond any of their gods? work. ?What exactly is this?? he asked the man, who had very silent as they walked to where his student lay injured. The man glanced back at him.

    ?This is a starship. We were on our way to complete some negotiations on the planet of Alderaan...?

    ?Planet?? Patroklos echoed, his voice full of awe.

    ?Ah, I see. Your planet must have very primitive technology,? the man said, nodding as if he suddenly underst
  2. Keeper_of_Swords Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 20, 2003
    star 5
    Cool story..nice way you got Starwar characters and historical characters interacting with each other.

    Two great mythologies combined.
  3. KenobisGirl Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 10, 2001
    star 4
    Aww, thanks, Keeper_of_Swords! I'm glad you liked it. :)
  4. PatttyB0123 RSA Latin America

    Manager
    Member Since:
    Apr 2, 2003
    star 6
    This is the best story I have read. KenobisGirl. Wonderful. I love those type of stories.

    I could see those warriors looking the spaceship. Nice the way Qui-Gon was acting with our little Obi-Wan.

    Wow Obi-Wan talking to the warriors

    ?Why do I always end up having to rescue you two?? [face_laugh]

    Great story.
  5. KenobisGirl Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 10, 2001
    star 4
    [face_blush] Wow, Patty! Thanks so much!!! It was a lot of fun to write, though it took me forever to finally get some inspiration for it. I turned it in today, so we'll see how it goes. :)

    Thanks again!
  6. KenobisGirl Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 10, 2001
    star 4
    Up! Feedback, anyone?
  7. KenobisGirl Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 10, 2001
    star 4
    Okay, one last up before I let this go... *sniffles*
  8. CrystalKenobi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 31, 2003
    star 4
    A very unique twist. Makes me want to go get my old highschool liturature book out and reread the The Iliad.
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