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Saga Anakin Skywalker: Descent into Darkness

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Hexagram, Jun 5, 2003.

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  1. Hexagram

    Hexagram Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jun 4, 2003
    Descent into Darkness

    The Galaxy is at war. The clone armies of the Great Republic have won a surprise victory in the first skirmish against the Separatist armies of the former Jedi Master Count Dooku. A half conscious and severely wounded Anakin Skywalker lies in the arms of Senator Padme Amidala as they race back to Coruscant immediately after the battle of Geonosis. They race along in hyperspace on a pre-set course aboard the Senator?s private Nubian yacht The Nibah, destined for the legendary capitol world Coruscant.


    ***Anakin lies in Padme?s arms, he is in a cold sweat and unconscious, when suddenly he begins to scream***

    Anakin (Delirious): Nooo! Dooku?can?t be allowed to live?mother!

    Padme: Anakin! Calm down! Please? You need to rest Ani, you?ve been hurt badly?you?ll be home soon, then everything will be alright.

    Anakin: Home? No?I have no home?mother?!

    ***Anakin falls a into delirium; he falls into a never ending black hole while screaming for his lost mother, he sees many faces, some he knows and some he does not. He feels nothing but pain. Suddenly he crashes face first into burning sand. He sits up feeling as though he can?t breath, and sees a faceless man shrouded inside a black cloak, slowly walking towards him***

    Anakin: Who (coughs), who are you?

    Man in black: That?s not the question you want to ask now is it Anakin?

    Anakin: How do you know my name? Do I know you? Where am I?
    Man in black: So many questions but still?none of them are the correct one.

    ***The man in black raises Anakin up appx 10ft in the air with a wave of his hand and then throws him against a rocky wall that has suddenly appears from nowhere***

    Man in black (mockingly): You like getting thrown into walls don?t you Ani? Now what is your real question? Please now, think hard, it pains me to hurt you?

    Anakin (shaken and weak): I want to know how to save my mother?she?s dead but?I know there must be some way?

    Man in black: There is no way Anakin---when are you ever going to grow up? You?re not even on the right track yet, are you completely brainless?

    ***The MIB picks Anakin up again with a wave of a hand and holds him in an invisible vice like grip as he squeezes his right hand into a tight fist***

    Anakin (In pain now): Right track? What do you mean?

    Man in black: Close again Anakin, but again you?re still missing the big picture aren?t you? Then again, that?s why I?m here to help steer you in the right direction. Let me ask you a question now: what is your purpose in life?

    Anakin: My purpose?! Well, I?m a Jedi? I?m supposed to help people; I?m supposed to be a hero?

    Man in black: And how exactly have you been helping people Anakin? Have you been saving them? Who has lil Ani saved lately?

    Anakin: I, uh?.I haven?t saved anybody??.

    ***The MIB is angry now and changes form into a Tusken raider for a split second, then he pounds Anakin back down into the burning sand***

    Man in black (Incredulous): What?! You haven?t saved anybody!? Not one single solitary person? I find this hard to believe, I mean---aren?t you the chosen one?!

    Anakin (Coughing and weak): Yes I am, but?I?m not sure what that means, exactly?
    Man in black: How in the galaxy can the chosen one?the?chosen?one---not know what he is supposed to do?!

    ***The MIBGrips Anakin tightly and raises him high in the air again***

    Anakin (Pained to breathe): Well, the prophecy isn?t clear?it has to do with bringing balance to the force?

    Man in black: So let me get this straight?you have no idea what it is that you are chosen to do? You have NO idea what your purpose is? With all of the ?great? masters of the Jedi Council mentoring you and training you and teaching you the ways of the force---you still have no clear idea what it is that you are supposed to be doing?!

    ***The MIB motions one hand violently and Anakin feels as though h
  2. Hexagram

    Hexagram Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jun 4, 2003
    Please give your thoughts, pro or con...
  3. Kiin_Jasiin

    Kiin_Jasiin Jedi Padawan star 4

    Aug 12, 2002
    I think it is a good metaphor for the dark side's creating a struggle in Anakin... his arrogance and rage personified and manifested as the MIB....the MIB who would be Vader.

    Not bad for a first timer. ;)
  4. Bezo

    Bezo Jedi Knight star 5

    Apr 23, 2003
    Very well done, Hexagram. I applaud you.
  5. tatooinewizard

    tatooinewizard Jedi Padawan star 4

    May 13, 2003
    Very interesting. I look forward to seeing more of your work.
  6. Protege-of-Thrawn

    Protege-of-Thrawn Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Mar 14, 2001
    Agreed, I live the way this manifestation really pounds on Anakin during the interrogation, it reminded me of Palpatine mocking Luke during ROTJ: and he is really, the true manifestation of the dark side.

    Well done indeed.
  7. Hexagram

    Hexagram Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jun 4, 2003
    Thanks guys! Your comments mean alot!

    I will have a new scene ready by the end of the week!
  8. TenelKaJedi

    TenelKaJedi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 9, 2003
    I liked your fic, but your style is remeniscant of Edgar Allen Poe; you write as if demented, yet strangely coherent. This is a fact.
    TenelKaJedi out
  9. Hexagram

    Hexagram Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jun 4, 2003
    ---The Jedi Temple---

    ***Anakin Skywalker floats in a Bacta tank while medical droids monitor his status and attend to his injuries nearby. Obi-Wan Kenobi and Padme Amidala watch Anakin intently from an adjacent observation room***

    Obi-Wan: It seems the medical droids have stabilized Anakin; his most significant injury seems to have come from Dooku?s lightening. If only he had waited, I know we could have stopped Dooku?

    Padme: Anakin has been through a lot Master Obi-Wan?his mother is dead?..he feels tormented.

    Obi-Wan: His mother is dead? How do you know this?

    Padme: Anakin and I?we went to Tattooine after he had nightmares about his mother, when we arrived we found out that she had been murdered by Tusken Raiders.

    Obi-Wan: Blast! This is exactly as I feared; Anakin was not ready to be out on his own yet. He?s never gotten over his attachment to his mother?

    Padme: Anakin?s human Obi-Wan, how can you expect him to forget about his own mother?

    ***It begins again?or maybe it never really stopped. An infinite amount of scenarios fluctuate through Anakin?s mind as he dreams about what could have been---what should have been. He passes through blackness and screams at his pain. He?s not afraid to hurt, he?s used to that, but he can?t stand to fail others. How many mistakes can he make? When will he make the right decisions? There is only one answer in Anakin Skywalker?s mind, one answer that makes him feel as though there is hope for the future? and that solution is control. No longer will Anakin allow himself to be a victim or pawn of other entities: the Jedi, the Sith, the Tuskens, Watto, the Hutts... No, from this point on Anakin will do the controlling; he will be power... More time passes and Anakin continues to fall, his descent into the darkness seems endless; in fact, he barely even recognizes that he has stopped falling. There is no sound where Anakin sits; there is no temperature; there is no need to breathe; there is no need to think; there simply is no need in this darkness, and Anakin can finally rest?but only for a moment, the darkness provides protection, but there is a price, always a price. Anakin opens his eyes and sees a dark shape sitting in front of him quietly, as if in prayer***

  10. TenelKaJedi

    TenelKaJedi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 9, 2003
    Very dark. Things are heating up a little, huh?

  11. Darth_Leia_6669

    Darth_Leia_6669 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Apr 26, 2003
    This is becomming a rather spooky story, but I understand what Anakin is feeling. If he's in control, then noone can mess with his life. Unfortunatly, this line of thought usually backfires in many ways. This is a good look into Anakin's troubled mind. Good job!

  12. tatooinewizard

    tatooinewizard Jedi Padawan star 4

    May 13, 2003
    Oh, good job! I can't wait for more!
  13. Phatooine

    Phatooine Jedi Youngling

    Jul 6, 2003
    This story is being finished here, at a site that allows true creative freedom! Cursing and all subject matter allowed! ;)

    VVVVVVV----see sig!
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