Before - Legends And Now For Something Completely Dooku--------(humor vignettes) 7/12! UPDATED! The Greatest of These

LOL on the underwear conversation!!! That's so hilarious!!! Loved it!!

Also loved the b'day one! Ahhh it's so sweet!

Great work! You always bring a smile to my face and a laugh on the days I surely need it!!

Well done, my dear!

 

Y'know, I think that Dooku secretly likes having a Padawan who surprises him, no matter what undignified thing Qui-Gon comes up with. Dooku just wouldn't be happy with anyone boring as an apprentice.

 

I hadn't read the first one, Candy Stick, yet. I didn't know it existed!

*deep breath*

Trust Dooku to be fascinated by the tiny, plastic, *commercial* lightsaber-lighter thingies. Oh, that man.

Really, Dooku did suppose that he ought to be properly offended that some company had reduced a weapon as elegant and noble as a lightsaber to a silly toy used to light smokesticks, but he couldn?t help examining them.
Yes, examining them on a 'purely technical level'. But of course!

he had become deeply engrossed in clicking them on and off
I adore that line. He's so intense in everything he does, isn't he?

Yeah, you just keep telling yourself that.

What I most love about your pre-JA Dooku vignettes, whether humour, H/C, angst or drama, is that you characterise his little instances so well. He is, by nature, someone who can be very, very frightening even when he doesn't particularly desire to create that impression, so I truly enjoy seeing how you flesh out his human moments [read: boo-boos].

Dooku reached up to scratch at the phantom itch of his newly-removed Padawan braid. His fingers passed only through air, and startled, he drew his hand back.
Not-so-subtle but very appropriate reminder of how terribly young he is at this point.

It is entirely characteristic of Dooku to get flustered by a store clerk who isn't even being overbearing. Actually, I am beginning to think that perhaps he would have done better and emabarrassed himself to quite a lesser degree if the Bothan *had* been a bit more overbearing.

he was really going to make an impression on the galaxy as a Jedi Master, wasn?t he?
I think that 'Ohno-ohno-ohno-I'm-going-to-be-a-less-than-spectacular-Jedi' thing is a hang-up all Padawans and newly-Knighted Padawans have. Oh, the trials of being a Force-sensitive overachiever?

I love how those two events or rather Dooku's response to them sort of mirror each other. Dooku, the One of eloquence and glib-ness, getting pwned by a petrol-station lackey, and then blaming him; Dooku leaving Qui-Gon in the store, then blaming *that* particular little boy for not paying 'closer attention to [his] surroundings [!].

He pulled out his igniter, frowned at it, and set it aside.
You have to write something one day where he is using that thing. To light a 'smokestick'.

Qui-Gon caught it deftly, even as he stared at Dooku, eyes wide and bright, his voice soft, as if hardly daring to believe. ?You bought me?candy??
You know, that must account for Qui-Gon's behaviour throughout most of JA. Sugar dependency problem. But he is such a dopey, adorable little tyke!

But he couldn?t entirely ignore the slight glow he felt, at seeing this little child?his little child so happy.
Ach, just *love*.

 

Ahhh, and you thought/hoped I had forgotten all about this story! *g*

Thank you so, so, so very much for the nominations. I am tickled a thousand shades of pink and adore you all. <333

So, accordingly, I'm posting a little thank-you update.

~*~

The Greatest of These


~*~

?Well...? Qui-Gon began, conversationally, peering down into the fathomless depths below. ?...this is certainly an awkward way to die.?

His voice echoed oddly back at him from the wall of the deep cavern. ?Don?t you think so??

Silence.

The boy nodded to himself, Padawan braid swinging with the motion. ?I mean, perhaps it?s not all lost. The Force moves in unusual ways. I think we ought to simply wait, and see if this doesn?t resolve itself. I mean, it really is an unusual situation.?

Still nothing, except one morbid drip-drop from somewhere far below.

?...don?t you think so, Master??

?Qui-Gon Jinn please, by the bloody, eternal, merciless stars, could you for one single moment, simply shut up?? Dooku turned his head awkwardly, tilting just enough to catch Qui-Gon?s eye with a thoroughly poisonous glare. It was difficult, to say the least, meeting his Padawan?s eye from their current position.

That position being suspended by their feet, upside-down over an ominous pit.

Tied together. Back to back.

Clad in only their undershorts.

?I?d prefer to have my life ended in silence.? The Master hissed out a breath. ?Ironic, miserable silence.?

?Oh,? Qui-Gon replied, his voice laced with quiet hurt. ?Yes. Of course. I?m sorry, Master. I?ll be quiet.?

Dooku?s sigh echoed through the well-like cavern. He knew that the boy was understandably nervous, but this ceaseless anxious chatter was giving him a headache. It also really wasn?t making it any easier to concoct an escape plan. Of course, that might have been the whole imminent doom of the situation as well. ?Thank you.?

?I just was making the point that out of all of the countless combinations that would have more or less equaled our deaths, this is possibly one of the more creative options, no? Got to give the royal family at least some credit for that.?

?Qui-Gon...?

The boy was talking faster now. Dooku thought maybe he was suffering a bit of hysteria. ?I mean, some might have just shot us. But this is new and different. Death by water monster. Variety truly is the spice of life, isn?t it??

?That?s not silence, Qui-Gon.?

?I really am sorry, Master.? Qui-Gon sighed. ?I just, I didn?t think it would turn out this way. Negotiations were going so well...?

?Clearly, not.? Dooku injected darkly.

?It escalated so quickly. I never would have thought that all this time they were planning on feeding us to this thing...?

?Well, we ought to both meditate on our lack of foresight. In silence.?

A pause.

?What was this creature called, again??

?A Camiena.?

Qui-Gon nodded slightly, looking down at the dark sludgy water again contemplatively. ?I?m good with animals, you know. Maybe I could talk it out of eating us. Only, I can?t exactly sense it...?

Dooku craned his neck to study the muck as well. ?It isn?t down there. They haven?t released it yet.?

?They haven?t?? Qui-Gon wiggled uncomfortably. ?How do you know??

Dooku snorted. ?Camiena have tentacles. It would be peeling our skin off right now, if it were down there.?

?Oh,? Qui-Gon swallowed. There was a long, weighty pause. His voice was softer, with an inflection of fear as he spoke again. ?When are they going to release it??

?Qui-Gon??

?Yes??

?How, in the Sith hell, should I know??

?I?m sorry, Master.?

Another long silence, except for the creak of the chains that hung them over the pit.

?So, I never thought I?d die at thirteen.?

?I never assumed I?d die at twenty-three.?

Qui-Gon squirmed. ?You?re only twenty-three??

?Yes.?

?I didn?t know that.?

?What, would you like a refund back on your education??

?Is that why Healer Willow calls you ?kiddo? sometimes??

?No,? Do

 

Congrads on those noms!

LOL! Indeed silence would have been golden! And to think it likes Dooku, how ironic!

Great work! Loved it!

 

*Can't breathe*







*collapse*


*dies*

---

Having now taken over the keyboard from Layren, I have been informed by Lord_Timotheus as he shall henceforth be named, that you are in charge of all accrued medical bills as a result of Layren's death from reading this fic.

~~ Yours sincerely,


Kyran Josel

 

Bravo charmisjess ...oh dear *wipes tears from eyes*...

?It was nice being your apprentice.?

?It was not.?

?I?ll see you when we become one with the Force??

?You really don?t sound particularly optimistic about my water-monster fighting abilities.?

Wonderful! Great job.

 

Oh, my gosh, Master Jess, this fic is love. What a way to go, no? Like Qui-Gon said, you've got to give that royal family credit for creativity. *imagines that particular scene and collapses from laughter*

I'm totally tempted to quote the whole thing, but here are my very favorite bits:

?Oh,? Qui-Gon swallowed. There was a long, weighty pause. His voice was softer, with an inflection of fear as he spoke again. ?When are they going to release it??

?Qui-Gon??

?Yes??

?How, in the Sith hell, should I know??

?I?m sorry, Master.?

*snickers* Dooku's as frazzled by this as Qui-Gon is. He just won't admit it.

?Is that why Healer Willow calls you ?kiddo? sometimes??

?No,? Dooku murmured. ?She calls me that because she?s completely mad.?

?Oh.? Qui-Gon gave another forlorn sigh. ?I wish she were here now, though.?

?That would be a...? The Master considered. ?...a chorus of annoying.?

?I?m not annoying.?

?Hush, Qui-Gon.?

A chorus of annoying, indeed. Poor Dooku. It's so hard to face impending doom with dignity when you're tied to a babbling Padawan and clad only in your undershorts.

?Master...? Qui-Gon had been rather trying to be brave, but the little squeak slipped out. He reached between the chains, finding Dooku?s hand, somehow. The sludge below them moved.

?Just close your eyes, child.? Dooku squeezed back. ?If you?d like, I can put you asleep with the force.?

I want to hug them both.

?Tell it you?re in love with it, for all I care, but it isn?t going to work!? Dooku sighed. ?Oh, stars. Well, here we go.?

?It was nice being your apprentice.?

?It was not.?

?I?ll see you when we become one with the Force??

?You really don?t sound particularly optimistic about my water-monster fighting abilities.?

Classic. ^_^

Oh, and the ending was priceless. Fancy that. The beastie liked Dooku. *delight*

Great work, as always, and once again, congrast on the noms!

 

There was a loud squelch, not unlike the sound of a long, loving, particularly wet tongue kiss.

Silence.

?Master??

More silence.

?Master, I think it likes you.?

Can't... breathe... *gasps*

I can't describe how much I loved this! I would have quoted the entire thing! (but that would've been slightly redundant...) Qui-Gon's need to talk out his fear and Dooku's vehement need for silence were both perfectly in character and hysterically funny. Wow. *catches breath*

My only complaint is: you're going to leave them to *die*???

Congratulations on your noms, Charm! They are well-deserved. Can we look forward to more viggies soon?

 

I don't think she's leaving them to die, really.

Just to be snogged by a tentacle monster. Perhaps it will help them escape.

Well, once it gets over the initial response of "Awww, they gave me cute mammals on a string!"

 

Don't know how I missed these....

Loved the green underwear. Maybe if he's just gone for a little color...

Oh well.

Well done.