And Then There Was Light (the beginning of the Jedi, updated 12-21-04)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Jade_Skywalker, Mar 17, 2002.

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  1. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    400TH post and still waiting on the beta! ;)
  2. whats-her-face Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 5, 2004
    star 1
    Forget the beta! We want posts now! We don't mind a few grammer errors! Pleeeeeeeeeeeease J_S!
  3. jeday Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 4, 2004
    star 2
    I agree, please post now! [face_batting]
  4. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Who says it's just grammar errors? My beta does good work. I'm PMing her tonight about it. It really should be soon. I would post a small part of it like just to preview what's coming up in the next post, but I wonder if that would really help to ease the craving or only making it worse? ;)
  5. jeday Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 4, 2004
    star 2
    Hmmm, worse I think. [face_thinking]
  6. Kahara Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 3, 2001
    star 3
    Take all the time you need to get the post right. Pay no attention to me bouncing off the walls! [face_laugh]
  7. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
  8. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Keep your eyes open everyone. You'll have it tomorrow evening! :D
  9. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    It's much later than I was hoping. I had a little car trouble today, and got home later than I expected, but it's FINALLY here!! :D This is an essential part in the story, so i hope you guys enjoy it, and thank you SO much for your patience and support. :D


    ?Jeredi,? the gentle voice of the Force called to him.

    Jeredi slowly opened his eyes, taking in a deep calming breath as he did. His desire to know his sister?s fate remained, but he forced himself to clear his mind, and he felt more at peace. As he surveyed his surroundings, he noticed that the realm was still a constant white as it had been when the Force told him to meditate. The Force was standing before him in the image of his sister as always, her expression blank.

    Jeredi stood, not saying a word, but holding a posture that showed he was ready for instructions.

    ?We?re finished, Jeredi,? she spoke, emotionless.

    The statement took him slightly by surprise. ?What??

    ?Your training is nearly complete. The guards will be coming soon to take you out of the hole.?

    Jeredi could hardly believe it. He had been certain there was still much to do. ?How long have we been meditating??

    ?Quite some time.?

    ?But I thought I still needed practice in some areas??

    ?Such as??

    Jeredi thought hard. ?You said I needed to learn to control myself.?

    The Force smiled. ?You learned that pretty well through meditating. That is one of the advantages of meditation. It helps you to clear your mind, and be more open to me. Many of your questions will be answered that way. As for the other areas, you already know them, and you?ve become an exceptional fighter.?

    ?So what happens now??

    She stepped closer to him, bringing her face very close to his. ?You remember. Remember everything you have been taught here. It will save you.? She began taking steps backwards. ?Remember, Jeredi.? And with that, she disappeared.

    ?Because believe me, you will need it.? The voice had come from behind. Jeredi spun around to find the image of Kalisha standing there. Confused, he began taking a step forward, but came to a halt before it could be completed. There was something different about this apparition. Something untrustworthy; something . . . dark.

    His eyes suddenly went wide as he backed off. ?You?re not the Force.?

    The image smirked and stepped closer to him. ?On the contrary, I am.?

    He continued backing away from the oncoming presence. ?You?re not the one who?s been training me!?

    The smirk growing into a sneer, she began to circle him. Jeredi stayed where he was, taking in deep breaths to keep himself calm.

    ?Have I not? Do you not remember Brock? What of when you first truly touched this power?? She came up from behind and whispered close to his ear. ?Remember the toolbox you threw that inspired the story of the ghost? I put Brock?s life in your hands, and showed you how to take it.?

    Growling deeply, he spun around to face her, only to find Maleah now standing there. ?She could have been yours by now, Jeredi,? the image spoke. ?And you never would have ended up in the hole.?

    ?I never would have been taught what I learned here.?

    The image of Maleah stepped closer, wrapping the left arm around his neck, and running a finger down his cheek to his lips. ?It?s not too late. Forsake all that you have learned here. She can be yours. You can free the slaves, destroy Sireth, and get Kalisha back. What I offer you are instant results. Not lectures on patience.?

    Jeredi could feel the darkness begin to overwhelm him. He had forgotten how tempting it was. The feeling that he could have it all so easily, but then he remembered the words of his mentor, the intense training he?d undergone in this realm, and refused to let it all be in vain. Though impatience was one of his weaknesses, Jeredi also had honor. He yanked her arms away, and brought his face close. ?I will not give into you.? Then he turned and walked away.

    ?You don?t understand, Jeredi,? she called. Jeredi spun back arou
  10. jacen200015 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 11, 2002
    star 4
    Yahoo a post. :) Fantastico.
  11. Jauhzmynn Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2002
    star 4
    Wow. Yet another amazing work. The struggle of Jeridi is made very evident. Well done.
    I liked the morphing ability the 'darkside' showed. Interesting, that mirrors how evil actually operates. Using illusions, and the person's own weaknesses and emotions to bring them down. Nicely well done.
  12. Kahara Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 3, 2001
    star 3
    :) Finally. It's worth the wait.

    Awesome post, very powerfully written. I love how mythical the whole story is, and this is one of the best parts yet. It kind of seems to show how Jeredi is making the path for the Jedi in all the thousands of years after.
  13. Jedida Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 3, 2002
    star 4
    *dances around the room* It's a post! It's a post! Finally, it's a post!

    Very awesome posty, J_S. Jeredi's temptation of the dark side was extremely well done. Totally amazing.

    Please don't make us wait so much for the next post! I don't think I can take it ;) j/k- take all the time you need. We all definately appreciate the quality of this fic and the hard work you (and your beta!) put into it. :)





    Oh, and yes, I am using the old sn again. Sorry if I confused you ;)
  14. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Wahoo! Thanx you guys. :D

    jacen200015: Thanx man!

    Jauhzmynn: I'm glad that you liked how I worked in the darkside.

    Kahara: Thank you! I'm definately trying to work in the connections to out "modern day" Jedi with these ancient ones. :)

    Jedida: Thanx for reading. I'm planning on going to Starbucks sometime soon and just stay there for hours and write, so hopefully you guys won't have to wait so long for the next one. ;)
  15. Jedida Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 3, 2002
    star 4
  16. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Wahoo! Did the Starbucks thing today and got a scene finished, and a pretty difficult scene, believe you, me. I think you guys will like it. Just another scene to write, and it'll be off to the beta. :D
  17. Jedida Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 3, 2002
    star 4
  18. Jedida Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 3, 2002
    star 4
  19. Tanith Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 13, 2003
    star 1
    Thanks for the PM Jade - I have been away from the boards for a while (restricted internet access is not fun!!) but thought I should drop a line to say that I'm not ignoring your story, and that I appreciate the PM's.

    I loved the parallels between the last scene and RotJ, with the dark side of the force manifesting its self and using force lightning on Jeredi.

    Good on him for standing up to the pain and remaning true to the light.

    Brok will be in for a bit of a shock when he realises Jeredi is still alive :D

    Tanith
  20. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Thanx Tanith. I'm glad you're still around. :D I totally understand what internet restrictions can be like. It sucks! ;)

    New post tomorrow everyone to make up for all the waiting you had to do last time! :D :D :D
  21. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Yay!! Here's your new post. Enjoy it!! :D



    After an extensive and thorough search of the training room, it was determined that the traitors had set no traps in order to kill Sireth the Younger and Kalisha. Kragen made the suggestion that the traitors themselves would make a surprise attack, most likely hiding in the dark corners of the training room before the arrival of their targets. The training room was small, so he also suggested that not many would be sent for the ambush. Seeing no other possibilities, Lord Sireth agreed. As a result, and also having great confidence in the skills of his heir and aspiring Tomaj Lai, Sireth the Younger and Kalisha were ordered to enter the training room the next morning casually and seemingly unaware of the pending attack. They were also to make sure that they left one or two of them alive for questioning and to receive the traitor?s death.

    Kalisha found it difficult to sleep that night, for every time she closed her eyes, she could see a traitor coming at her with a saber. She was feeling rather uneasy about the attack, though her skills as a fighter were adequate, and she would have Sireth the Younger fighting at her side. All this and the fact that they had found out about the attack gave them a major advantage, but something continued to nag at her mind, filling her thoughts with doubt.

    The night came and went, and by morning, the thoughts of doubt had not ceased. The only comfort was brought on by her saber lesson with Sireth. His teaching method was much different from Ruth?s. It intrigued her and she found herself getting so deep into the lesson that she forgot all about the pending attack. After an hour of working with Sireth, Kalisha was granted a break, and her thoughts were quickly turned back to the previous night?s concern. She knew that Sireth was aware of her every thought, and so she also knew that Sireth was aware of her distress, yet he chose not to address it.

    He carried on just as he would have if he had not known of the traitor?s intentions. By the end of the lesson, Kalisha?s anxiety was not getting any better. Sireth moved to the side of the room and grabbed a small towel. After wiping the sweat off his brow, he turned back to her. ?It is time, Kalisha.? He took a step closer. His gaze pierced into her, and his tone steadily held all his authority and order. ?Do not disappoint me.?

    Kalisha knew there would be no more words spoken, so she took her leave with nothing left to do except bury her fear as best she could. Sireth the Younger was waiting for her at the door to their training room where the ambush would take place. She came up next to him and for a long moment, they only stood there, staring at what would either be their victory or their doom.

    ?Do you sense anything?? Kalisha asked him.

    ?They?re in there. I can?t be sure, but I don?t think they plan to attack immediately, so try to act as natural as possible. We will go in there and begin our stretching the same as we always do.?

    Kalisha gave him a firm nod. ?I understand.?

    Sireth nodded in return and pressed the button that opened the doors. They walked in casually and the first thing they noticed was how dim the lights were. Most of the ceiling lights were not even on, mainly the ones to the sides. The lights more in the center were still left to a low setting, illuminating the middle of the room and leaving the corners in the shadows. ?Room lights to normal,? Sireth ordered the system. When nothing happened, he turned his attention back to Kalisha. ?The lighting systems must be faulty.?

    She nodded, still trying to maintain a cool head as he so easily seemed to be doing. ?Right. Should we report it??

    Sireth shook his head. ?That?s not necessary. We can worry about that later. We have enough light to work.?

    ?Alright,? Kalisha replied shrugging her shoulders.

    Their routine stretches began in a silence that worried Sireth the Younger. Throughout all of their working with each other, they had always been able to maintain some
  22. Jedida Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 3, 2002
    star 4
    Wow.

    That was an amazing post. The fight, the ring, the punishment... just amazing.
  23. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Thanx Jedida. :)

    I wonder where everyone else is. :confused:
  24. Dallas_Valla Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 8, 2003
    star 3
    Absorbed in real life.

    PHEW!! That was a lot. I can't wait for the next post. Jade, you've got a real talent for writing. I hope you're putting it to use's beyond just Fan fic's. Keep up the good work. I'll be watching.
  25. Kahara Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 3, 2001
    star 3
    :eek: Ouch! That was written very well, especially the fighting and the destruction of the ring. Hmm, seems like they knew Kalisha wasn't going to be able to kill that easily in cold blood.

    Sorry I'm late in commenting. [face_blush]
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