And Then There Was Light (the beginning of the Jedi, updated 12-21-04)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Jade_Skywalker, Mar 17, 2002.

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  1. Tanith Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 13, 2003
    star 1
    Wow - that was really well written.

    It looks like Kalisha has cut all ties to her past - but how did the potential assassin get the ring? Was it planted by Sireth? or is it someone from her home planet?

    Oh, the questions!!
  2. Amidala_Skywalker Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 4, 2001
    star 5
    Incredible, Gwen! :)

    The latest posts are absolutely brilliant! You had some unbelievable lines in there! And the chilling end to that last chapter?

    I don?t want Connor and Kalisha in an eventual relationship, though. I guess I want an evil/evil pairing ;).

    Ams [face_love]

  3. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Thank you everyone! :D

    Dallas: Thanx for reading. I'm working to put my talents to good use someday. :)

    Kahara: I'm sorry that I'm late in replying. ;) Thank you for your reply.

    Tanith: I should probably explain to you. She didn't see the guy holding her ring, she was getting ready to give the final blow when she noticed it on her own finger, and then it brought back all of her emotions. Thank you for reading though. :D

    AMSIE!!: I know, I practically dragged you back. ;) j/k. Thanx for reaing, I always love your replies. BTW, I never said anything about Connor and Kalisha in an eventual relationship. ;)
  4. Tanith Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 13, 2003
    star 1
    [face_blush] Oops, maybe should read a bit slower in future [face_blush]

  5. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
  6. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Yay! I'm 21 today, and again the best Birthday present I could get would be lurkers de-lurking on me, just so I know you are there, and what you think of the story. ;) ;) Luv ya guys! :D
  7. Amidala_Skywalker Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 4, 2001
    star 5
    Happy Belated Birthday, Gwen! :) I hope the day was everything it should be.

    Ams [face_love]
  8. jeday Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 4, 2004
    star 2
    Happy Birthday Jade! :) I am still around and enjoy your wonderful story. =D=
  9. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Thanx you two. :)

    Okay guys, I have an update for you. I got good news and some bad news.

    A bit of the bad news is that I am not yet done with the next part.

    Some of the good news is that I have a perfectly good reason for it. It is extremely long for a post. I'm not kidding. So far, it has come to 25 pages on my laptop.

    More of the bad news is, that means it's going to take awhile for the beta, cause we don't want her rushed. ;)

    And more good news is, there's going to be tons to enjoy. :D

    But I do have a question. Since it is very long, how do you guys want it? Do you want it all in one post? Or I could devide it up into three parts, post the next part each day, or I could just give it to you as the beta comes back(cause it'll be coming back in parts).

    Keep in mind that this post has a lot of angst in it. There's no perfect place to stop until it's finished which is why none of it has gotten to the beta yet. ;)

    It's up to you guys. :)
  10. StevioM Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 8, 2003
    Hey Jade! Personally I dont think there is anything better then a big long post after a dry spell.. thats just my vote though!
  11. Tanith Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 13, 2003
    star 1
    Ooooo, choices. One huge post is good, but so is 3 quite large posts on consecutive days.

    I would go for posts over 3 days, but, it's your story - your choice always wins out.

    and ...........(belatedly).......HAPPY BIRTHDAY :)
  12. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Okay you guys, here's an update! The next part is finally finished!! :D But! Expect somemore time of waiting. Believe me, t'will be worth it, especially since this is about how long it takes me to get an update, but this is 30 pages long!! Wahoo!! :D

    I think I have decided to post it in three parts, one directly after the other so that way, those who want to break in between can find their spot easily, and those who don't can just keep going. ;) Alright, I'm sure we're all looking forward to this. :D

    ~Jade
  13. Dallas_Valla Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 8, 2003
    star 3
    I am looking forward to this.
  14. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    GOOD NEWS!!! Yep! It's here! It's all here! I am working on the beta right now, and you should be expecting PMs within the next hour or so. YAY!! :D
  15. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Okay, so I had a minor crisis with my computer, but it should be up some time tonight. :)
  16. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Obviously much later than I had hoped, but here it is, 30 pages worth of "And Then There Was Light" for you're reading enjoyment. :D



    By the time the morning horn blew, Maleah had had about two standard hours of sleep. She found it difficult to sleep that night knowing that the next day was supposed to have been the day Jeredi would have been brought out of the hole. After Brock had cut off Jeredi?s food and water, he had seemed quite proud of himself and extremely cocky. That had lasted for about two days, and then each passing day after that, he had grown more and more irritated. She knew that if Jeredi had died, Brock would have informed her, yet he had not. Her heart wanted to hope, but her mind could not accept the possibility.

    As she left her hut to join the other slaves for their walk to the construction site, all she could think about was Jeredi - the only other person besides her family who had ever truly cared about her. Getting along the past six weeks without him had been difficult. She had gotten used to his company, enjoyed it even. When he was around, Maleah didn?t care about the looks that she received from others. She did not care how she was looked upon as an outcast. She was simply happier with him.

    If Jeredi dies in the hole, his blood is on your hands, not mine.

    Remembering Brock?s words was like a stab in her heart. Despite Connor?s efforts to convince her that Jeredi being thrown in the hole was not her fault, Maleah could not wipe the guilt from her conscience. Her throat and chest began to ache, but she tried to hold back the tears. She yearned for Jeredi to hold her again as he had before. She wanted to feel the caress of his fingers upon her face, but she knew it would never be again.

    Maleah hardly noticed when her group approached the construction site. Silent as she always was, and ignored by the others, she made her way to her level to begin working. Her throat began to feel as though it would burst from the endless aching. She had lost her dear friend, never realizing just how dear he was until now. Connor would never speak to her again. Jeredi was dead, and Ruby would soon join him. Once her grandmother was gone, Maleah would be alone.

    ?Maleah!?

    Suddenly startled at hearing her name, Maleah nearly stumbled as she turned around to see a young man coming at her. ?Connor??

    With a huge grin played across his face, Connor came rushing up to her, and wrapped her in the biggest embrace he could muster. It particularly began to scare her when he twirled her around.

    ?Connor! What are you doing??

    He set her back down on her feet, unable to keep the smile off his face. ?He?s alive, Maleah! Jeredi?s alive!?

    At the sound of the news, Maleah?s mood turned quite serious. ?What??

    ?I just heard that the guards were bringing a slave out of the sixty-footer this morning.?

    Maleah shook her head, not wanting her hopes to rise, to later be crushed again. Instead, she moved to a nearby toolbox, pretending to look for something. ?That doesn?t mean that it was him. It could have been anyone.?

    Connor stayed on her heals, the excitement never leaving his voice. ?How many other people could be coming out of the sixty-footer today of all days? Standard punishments for slaves who were out of line is either flogging or the twenty-footer.?

    Connor?s enthusiasm was beginning to make her blood boil. Hearing happily spoken words at a time for grief was enough to make her scream. Maleah slammed the toolbox lid shut and stood to face him. ?Connor, you and I both know that?s it?s not possible for Jeredi to be alive. He was in the hole for six weeks, the last two of which he had no food or water. No one can survive under those kind of conditions!?

    A bit taken back by her anger, Connor?s smile faded, and for a long moment, he only stared at her. Little by little his eyes grew more intense and determined. ?I know it?s him.?

    Maleah gave up on trying to convince him otherwise, but could not bring herself to look away. There was
  17. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Jeredi rushed through the corridors, noting that half the day was already gone. He only had a few short hours left before Maleah was going to give herself up to Brock. In a horrifying thought, he realized that he might not have enough time. Again, he called upon the Force for calm, and reached out to find the only person that he could trust.

    Connor!

    * * *

    ?Jeredi?? As soon as he heard the voice, Connor got to his feet looking around. He could feel Jeredi?s presence almost as if he were standing right next to him, but he was nowhere to be seen.

    Hear my voice.

    ?I hear you, Jeredi. Where are you??

    I don?t have time to explain. I need you to do something for me.

    Connor could feel Jeredi?s anxiety, and knew there was not going to be any happy reunion. Still he nodded his head. ?Name it.?

    As soon as work is over, I need you to find Maleah. She?ll resist you, but I need you to hide her from Brock. Can you do that for me?

    ?If she resists the way you say she will, I won?t be able to keep her hidden for long.?

    But you?ll do it?

    Connor nodded. ?Of course I will, Jeredi.?

    I?ll try to get there as soon as I can. Be careful.[

    Connor felt Jeredi?s presence slip away, and a cloud of doubt came over his mind. ?Jeredi,? he whispered to himself. ?What are you doing??

    * * *

    Satisfied that he had bought himself a little more time, Jeredi made his way out of the medical center and rushed to the transports. The Sireth Follower offices were thirty minutes away as the speeder drove. He knew that he was going to be cutting this awfully close, but there was no turning back now.

    As he got closer, the guard on duty noticed him, and held out a hand. ?Halt, slave! Get back to work. No one leaves work early.?

    ?I have to go to the offices and make a request of the head Sireth Follower,? Jeredi spoke firmly.

    The guard pulled out his dagger, nearly cutting Jeredi as he did. ?And I say, you?re not going anywhere.?

    Jeredi let out a loud sigh. ?I really don?t have time for this.? He waved his hand out in front of the guard?s face and spoke in a low tone. ?You will take me to the Sireth Followers offices.?

    The guard?s face suddenly became a look of understanding as he dropped the dagger on the ground and nodded. ?I will take you there.?

    * * *

    During the ride to the offices, Jeredi found himself glancing at his chrono every five minutes, constantly being reminding that time was short. When they finally arrived, he hopped out of the speeder, the guard close behind him. As they walked up to the front doors, two more guards approached them.

    ?Where are you taking him?? the one on the left asked.

    ?No slaves are to leave their work stations during working hours,? the other pointed out.

    Jeredi had not had a sudden growth of patience ever since tricking the last guard, so he decided no to waste his time with words. Waving both of his hands in each of their faces, he said, ?You will let me pass.?

    There was a moment?s pause. The guard on the right stumbled back a couple of steps, shaking his head, trying to deny the influence that Jeredi was having on him. The other just stood there.

    ?Who do you think you are making demands like that??

    Jeredi shook his head and smirked. ?You don?t want to know.? Noticing the other guard, still in a confused state, he reached out to the Force, making him stumble and slam right into the guard blocking his way. Jeredi then sprinted into the offices, being met with the startled faces of the people who worked in the offices.

    The guards outside got to their feet and hollered, ?Get him!?

    In the time that it took for that to register in their minds, Jeredi ran past them, jumping over the front desk and making his way into the corridors beyond. As he tried to make his way through the offices, he realized just how big of a mistake he had made. Had he been more patient, he might have thought of a better plan. Running from guards was not going to get him anywhere, but it wa
  18. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Brock only laughed. ?And what makes you think that a slave can give such an order to a guard??

    ?It?s not his order,? a new voice spoke up, and another person stepped out from the lift. Sireth Follower Lanx Tade stood strong and firm, a pose that could strike fear into anyone that stood beneath him. ?The order comes from me.? His pace was steady as he neared the guard. ?You no longer have any rights to Maleah, Brock. She is now Jeredi?s wife.? Tade finally stopped only a few feet away.

    Brock felt as though his legs would fail him completely. It was not often that a Sireth Follower would visit a construction site. Going against this man was totally insane. Adhering to his words, Brock dropped his dagger and released Maleah.

    Once she was free from Brock?s grasp, Jeredi came up and pulled her away, keeping her with him as he went to go help Connor. At the sight of the slave he had nearly killed, Brock?s eyes widened in realization.

    ?There is still one right left to me,? he claimed.

    Tade raised an eyebrow. ?And that is??

    Brock pointed an accusing finger at Connor. ?That slave struck me, and I wish to carry out his penalty.?

    ?You hit him first!? exclaimed Maleah.

    ?Is this true?? Tade asked. Brock glared at Maleah before turning back and remaining silent. It was enough of an answer for Tade, and he brought his tone down low and stern. ?If that be the case, then it was a fight that you provoked, and I will not allow you to kill a slave over your wounded pride. Now leave!?

    There was nothing left for Brock to do. Even he had not the nerves to stand up against a Sireth Follower. He bowed his head to the man, and left immediately. Tade turned back to Jeredi who was helping his friend to his feet. ?If you no longer need my assistance, I must return to the offices.?

    Jeredi nodded to him. ?Thank you.? He then turned to Connor, examining the cut on his arm. ?You alright??

    Though his arm still gave him great pain, Connor beamed at his friend that he had not seen for so long. ?I?m fine Jeredi. A quick patch job in the medical center, and I?ll be as good as new.?

    Jeredi smiled warmly. ?Thank you for what you did. I know you didn?t have to, and I didn?t mean for this to happen.?

    Connor shrugged it off. ?Don?t worry about it, Jeredi. I guess Maleah is starting to feel a little like a sister to me, just like Kalisha was to you.?

    Jeredi?s smile only grew until at the mention of Maleah?s name he looked around. ?Where is Maleah?? After a moment, he found her near the edge of the platform.

    Maleah had been standing there ever since the Sireth Follower had sent Brock away. He was there now; standing and staring at her from the next lower level, and smiling. There was something about the way he was smiling at her that made her turn cold. Bringing his fingers to his lips, he gently kissed them, then extended his hand out to her. It was then that he turned away from her and entered the lift.

    Maleah did not allow her eyes to move away. She stayed with him. Something inside her, for some reason, had to know what he was doing. The lift finally made it to the bottom level, and Brock?s familiar figure stepped out. He paused, and she was almost sure that he was once again looking at her, assuring himself that she was still watching. A moment later, he headed for the medical center.

    As soon as he entered the doors, Maleah gasped. ?No,? she whispered, as the shock had not completely set in.

    ?Maleah,? Jeredi came up behind her. ?Are you alright??

    ?Jeredi!? she exclaimed. ?He went into the medical center!?

    Jeredi?s eyes went wide. ?What??

    Maleah took off, sprinting as fast as she could to the lift. ?Ruby!?

    * * *

    Maleah burst into the medical center running as fast as she could, Jeredi right on her heels. As they ran through the corridors, Jeredi already knew it was too late. He?d known this was going to happen, but it had not made him any more prepared for what was to come. Everything was happening so fast, and he could hardly think. The on
  19. Amidala_Skywalker Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 4, 2001
    star 5
    I skipped to the end before I started reading and saw the name ?Kalisha? and I thought brother and sister were going to reunite. Come to think of it, we didn?t see Kalisha or Sireth in these thirty pages. Any reason for that? Continuity? A hidden plot twist?

    Fantastic chapter, Gwen! I adore it. I honestly love this story and even over months, I keep coming back again and again. I really think you should start reposting it in Before the Saga. It definitely needs more exposure.

    Back to the story, however?Meleah annoys me. I guess I think of her as the weak female character (and no, not because of her dealings with Brock). She just doesn?t seem to have Kalisha?s stamina. I don?t know why Jeredi loves Meleah. I thought he?d be attracted to a very strong-willed woman, a partner, a Jedi.

    You seem to pair very strong characters with more tender characters. Have you noticed that?

    Anyway, I enjoyed your writing! Happy Holidays! :)

    Ams [face_love]
  20. Dallas_Valla Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 8, 2003
    star 3
    *blinks*

    Hmm...great setup, awesome delivery.

    The story rocks.
  21. Jauhzmynn Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2002
    star 4
    I throughly enjoyed the new postings.

    I too noticed the parings of tender/ strong charactors. SOmehow it balances it out.
    I think in time Meleah will realise why Jeridi did what he did and forgove him.
  22. Jade_Skywalker Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2000
    star 4
    Yay replies! ;) I'm so happy with how well this part has turned out.


    Ams: Sorry your hopes for them two reuniting had to die. ;) My reasoning for coninuing this scene with only these characters is simple. It demanded it. Originally, I had planned breaks in between with scenes with Kalisha and Sireth the Younger, but when I started writing it, the story took on a totally different turn, and I couldn't stop till it was finished. O:)

    Dallas: Thanx for dropping in. I know how much you were looking forward to it, so I really hope you enjoyed it. :)

    Jauhzmynn: Thanx for reading. I really am wondering how you and Ams are picking up on these tender/strong relationshipS because as far as I know, there's only one. ;)

    Thank you to all to have replied and for those who could be reading this but just choose to stay silent, thank you. :D
  23. Grand_Admiral_Grant Ex-Mod

    Member Since:
    Nov 30, 2004
    star 6
    wow, I just discovered this story and I just couldn't stop reading!

    It's simply great!
  24. Tanith Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 13, 2003
    star 1
    Thanks for the PM. As always Jade a brilliant update. Just read all 3 posts in a one-er and feel totally emotionally drained.

    Poor Ruby - she knew what would happen to her when she told Jeredi to stop Maleah. I was wishing that they would reach her in time, or that the force would save her. I guess someone has to die, but you don't have to like it.

    Please let something nasty happen to Brock - he deserves to be squished like the bug he is. He's such a bully, pick on those who are weaker than him, but toady up to the guy in charge. Yuk, make Brock-burgers out of him!
  25. Jauhzmynn Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 16, 2002
    star 4
    :)I'll try to get my brain to get thsi out right. Sometiems it has a freeze and things don't come out right.
    Jeridai and Meleah appear to be the obivous ones..

    I think the ones who aren't would be Ruth and her grandkids. She's a strong/tender combination.
    .Tender with who she needs to be and tuff.

    Kalisha at one point was the strong one and Jeridai was the strong, now she's a strong one. Or thinks she's strong.
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