Saga Anger Leads To Hate: Anger Management With Darth Vader - Humour (Vader etal) Update 11/19

Well, since ObiLuvsVadr is, er...tied up right now...I will answer replies for him!!

Mrs Anakin Skywalker Well what do you think of Luke? I mean, really, he is a good kid and all but...Thanks for reading!


JediFalcon Thanks so much!!

ceridwen 1977 I know, RL got the best of us for a while there...but we are back baby!! And isn't it just like Obi to want to make up with Vader? (LOL, I almost wrote make out...where is my head at?? )


LilyHobbitJedi We always loved those lines too!! Thanks for reading along with us...I am sure Vader's reply will be along shortly...

VA Parky Thanks!! Hope you didn't hurt yourself when you fell out of that chair...and we are thrilled we can always make you laugh!!

Chewie Skywalker Thanks!!!


Nienna Narmolanya Come on, Obi has some serious game!! I think so anyway... I can't imagine Vader will be too happy either...hehe, we shall see!!


Dark Disciple Thanks honey!! Hehe, Obi certainly is crafty isn't he? Crafty and got mad game....not a bad combo...though he makes me nervous with all of the talk of lamps and what not!


KELIA I know!! Ewwww! Well to Mace and Padme anyway, but Obi and Catana...she is one smart cookie that one!

Maria Maxwell Thank you!

anakin luver Why thank you! And he really does have some father issues doesn't he?

 

Oh my gosh...I am so stupid. You're ObiLuvsVadr aren't you, AnakinGirl05?

 

Please put me on the PM list this is hilarious!

 

These are pure genius and the funniest thing I've read on these boards. Could you add me to the update list? Thank you.

 

Hee...anakin luver...You figured me out!!!! But shhh, don't tell anyone...

Handmaiden Azul Of course we will add you to the PM list!! Thanks for reading!!

Kelli LB Thank you so much? I think I am blushing!! Consider yourself added to the list!

 

Now, why would ObiluvsVader be tied up?
(on second thought, maybe I don't wanna know)
*looks around innocently*
Maybe I'll go see if the slackers over at Humor have updated...
*bolts*

 

Here is the next installment from our dear Lord Vader. Thanks to all who are continuing to follow our silliness.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Memo

To: Corelious Palshot ? Director IT department

From: Lord Vader

Subject: Quality of Equipment and Fundamental Incompetence of your Department


Item # 1 ? Quality of Equipment

The last requisition I made was that the keyboard procured for me be able to withstand heavy use. It is apparent that I did not make myself clear as the equipment shattered all too easily when it hit the wall.

Item # 2 ? Fundamental Incompetence

You were given fair warning about your probationary period and what was required of you to maintain your position. Rather than finding this ObiLuvsVadr character as requested, he has now contacted me directly. This is unacceptable. I am however, a reasonable man and at the Emperor?s request, I have decided not to pay you a personal visit. You are being put on notice effective immediately. One more slip up and your service to the Empire will be at an end.

Darth Vader


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Reply to Obi-Wan

Well, well, Obi-Wan. We meet again even if it is only over the Holonet. And it would serve you well to know your place. You may address me as Lord Vader. The name Anakin no longer has any meaning to me. Do not presume that you know the man I have become.


I do see that you have changed little, however. I see that the narrow-minded arrogance of the Jedi and your arrogance in particular has not faltered even after all these years. I would have thought you would have learned some humility, perhaps had it burned out of you by those Tatooine Suns. It appears, however, that the heat has only served to drive you that much closer to madness ? talking to Qui-Gon now are you? Blue ghost things? You might want to consider some therapy yourself there old friend. I?ll gladly send you the name of my therapist, though on second thought she may not be taking on any new patients any time soon. All the better, you can?t get off the planet anyway, can you?


As to your trite comment about both mine and my son?s intelligence, I seem to recall your comment to me that I had become a far better Jedi than you could ever hope to be. That doesn?t say much about your intelligence, does it? Perhaps your perception of Luke?s intelligence is clouded by the inane prattle you have been feeding him, filling his mind with fluff. What nonsense you spout, Obi-Wan! A New Jedi Order indeed! The Jedi Order is gone. Face it, Kenobi. The Jedi are no more save for yourself and that wrinkled green creature whose only goal that I could see was that of holding me back. I have brought peace and justice to my new Emp?er?to the new Empire. It told you on Mustafar I would do that and I have succeeded. I just have to work on the IT department. But I digress!


And while we?re on the topic of the wizened master, stop feeding my son garbage about training with him! He has gotten plenty of appropriate training in the use of the Force from me and doesn?t need any nattering about the evils of the Dark Side. Besides, he looks quite good in black. Runs in the family, you know. I assure you that Luke and his friends from TFN have just as much testosterone as his sister! I don?t doubt that for a moment. He is just a late bloomer and once you are removed from his life, he will follow in my footsteps. In fact, I know a few young women who would be very interested in his company. As for your comments about Leia?s friend, that just shows the depths to which you have sunk. My most recent intelligence reports have indicated that he is nothing more than a petty thief and smuggler. Is that the scum you now choose to befriend? I have my troops on alert to capture him, although I must admit, Leia has been little help in that respect. Also we do not speak of their mother here and it would be wise of you not to bring up her name again. She got what s

 

Vader, Vader, Vader...

 

Hee!!! Vader's letter was hysterical! What's especially great is how some of it sounds just like him - but then he goes off on a tangent about his lamps and how the ladies still flock to him and I am back on the floor. It's the perfect mixture of threat and humor! I love it!

Of course, if Vader asks I won't admit that I found it funny at all. No, no - quite the opposite in fact - I was shaking in my boots. Well, my sandals to be honest.

GREAT JOB! I always love to see an update to this story - it's so much fun to read. And what a perfect way to kick off my Friday!

 

It is apparent that I did not make myself clear as the equipment shattered all too easily when it hit the wall.

oh Vader...

It is a little more difficult to get close to them with this suit, but still, they flock!

...

I mean, I could not blame you if you had harbored any of those sort of feelings for me, I know the type of effect I can have.

i love how full of himself he is!!! it's so perfect.

great update! i am so pleased that this is running again!

 

Lord Vader is a "Ladies Man" hee hee hee...

Now thats funny.

It must be the uniform...

Great update.

Thanks for the pm.

 

It is apparent that I did not make myself clear as the equipment shattered all too easily when it hit the wall.

Oh my. When Vader says heavy use, he means heavy use. Great stuff as always! A good picker-upper after a stressful day at school.

More please!

 

I will expect reimbursement in one way or another for those lamps you stole originally from my apartment. Don?t think I don?t know it was you. You always loved those lamps and the apartment for that matter. Is it any wonder that there were all those rumors about you and I?.well, about the nature of our relationship? I mean, I could not blame you if you had harbored any of those sort of feelings for me, I know the type of effect I can have.

Taking my colour cues from anakin_luver here...

Ladies, you kill me! You really do! I love the update! The passage quoted above is just delicious, love the tone and sentiment of it. Vader really does think he's all that, doesn't he?

Wonderful continuation of the anger management saga, kudos guys. So very glad you updated this.

 

So great to see a new update I kept on thinking "when is the the next coming "

I do have a proposal for you though. My son, Luke ? you remember him of course, fine looking young man but somewhat of a challenge - he could do with some additional training in martial arts and other areas at which I believe you have at least some competence. Do consider this.



Vaders letters are hilarous, just when you think it couldn't get any funnier- it gets funnier!

 

Good update! Thanks for the pm.

Was the apartment joke in reference to the apartment jokes in the old humorous captions thread? That was so classic!

 

thanks for posting!

Uh, Vader? I'm sorry, but I don't think getting deep-fried on Mustafar helped your "Ladies' Man" image any. I can recommend a gambler who might be able to help with that.

 

your characterisation of Vader = magnificant he behaves as a tyrant yet with all the grace of a petulant teenager that's what makes it so funny and yes I have laughed for a long time especially the image of the poor IT dept. cowering as another outraged message comes through the system - maybe they should rebel? I think Vader should contemplate getting another therapist though... unless its all a conspiracy to keep him angry

 

Thanks to everyone for your patience between the posts and for continue to follow our silliness!

Handmaiden_Azul - I can see you shaking your head. Our Vader does have some issues!! Thanks for reading.

VA_Parky - It?s fun to see his mind wander. And don?t worry. We won?t whisper a word to him about your comments. So glad to add a bit of levity to your day!

anakin_luver - Pleased to see your comments and that you enjoyed it!

hyperspace_police - Definitely the uniform. You have to love a man in a uniform. Thanks for you comments.

Nienna_Narmolanya - He apparently still has some anger going on and still is destroying equipment. So glad we can help with the after school.

Dark_disciple - Thanks so much sweetie! Always wonderful to know we can make you laugh!

Mrs_Anakin_Skywalker - So glad we can continue to make you laugh. Thanks for reading.

ChewieSkywalker - Yes, the reference to the apartment was inspired by the old humorous captions thread. Just loved those jokes. Glad you enjoyed out update.

Exxaciel - Our dear Vader does have some delusions going one! Thanks for reading.

ceridwen1977 - Thanks for reading! Good to see you here! Vader still does have that ?it?s not fair? attitude from AOTC. His therapist?s techniques don?t seem to be working to well, do they.

 

Oh My Gosh!!
omg
omg
omg
omg........

*inhales deepley*

omg
omg
omg









VADIE.....VADIE......VADIE.....

Hah...so it was Obi sending the letters....

I loved these...they are great....they should win an award.

Maybe you could add a letter to Leia and one to Han...I would love to read the one to Han...


~Piper

 

Oh dear! Vader is such a hilarious guy. How can he be so full of himself?! And he thinks he's a ladies man...Well, who wouldn't love him?

Yes, I remember those apartment jokes in the RotS board last year. I loved those, and I'm glad you use the idea here.

She got what she deserved when Master ?baldy? Windu married her. He took a fair blow to his head when he landed on it that night on Coruscant and at least now, it is recognized what a dolt he had always been. Bah, they deserve each other.

Oh my gosh! That was evil - yet I'm almost laughing on the floor now.

Release my Bounty Hunter from the mind controls you have on her. She will no doubt return of her own volition then. Return the credit you had stolen from her and provide suitable reimbursement for the original lamps. Stop all communication with my family. Follow these terms to the letter and I will let you live out your pathetic existence on Tatooine. Fail to meet these terms and the predictions you have seemingly received from your old Master will indeed come to fruition.

NOOO! That was too much.

Can a person die to excessive laughing?

 

*looks at previous post*

So that's what all those tombstones are for...

 

How do you guys keep coming up such incredibles posts?!!!!!

I LOVED this latest installment, and I could not help but grin at Vader's description of Master Yoda.

Looking forward to more!!!!

 

The last requisition I made was that the keyboard procured for me be able to withstand heavy use. It is apparent that I did not make myself clear as the equipment shattered all too easily when it hit the wall.

Silly silly Vader, heavy use doesn't include chucking at the wall.

It appears, however, that the heat has only served to drive you that much closer to madness ? talking to Qui-Gon now are you? Blue ghost things? You might want to consider some therapy yourself there old friend.

Like you should talk Vadey.

Besides, he looks quite good in black. Runs in the family, you know.

I have to agree with him there actually...

Great update!!!

 

Even now, the ladies flock to my side. It is a little more difficult to get close to them with this suit, but still, they flock! I will expect reimbursement in one way or another for those lamps you stole originally from my apartment. Don?t think I don?t know it was you.

HA!

 

The_Pied_Piper ? Thanks for reading and glad you like them! Hmmm...Vader talking to Han. Frightening!

Darth_Father-in-law ? The apartment jokes were some of my favorites. And let?s hope you didn?t die from excessive laughter. Vader is not responsible for any deaths around here!

Exxaciel ?

Anakin_Heartbreaker ? Thanks so much. You are great!

LilyHobbitJedi ? Thanks for your comments and for sticking with us!!

little_miss_jedi ? He is a little full of himself isn?t he? Thanks for reading!