AVAST! and shiver me timbers! National Talk Like A Pirate Day is almost upon us! Talk Like A Pirate Day 2003 [image=http://www.talklikeapirate.com/graphics/blowmedown.gif] For ye land lubbers that might not be use to it, here be a few sayings you can use on that day. Now you best be practicing them says I. Properly warned ye be. Or ye may find yourself walking the plank! ARGH!!! *** For ye lazy land lubbers, here be a translator ARGH!!*** English to Pirate Translator THE BASICS Ahoy! - "Hello!" Avast! - Stop and give attention. It can be used in a sense of surprise, "Whoa! Get a load of that!" which today makes it more of a "Check it out" or "No way!" or "Get off!" Aye! - "Why yes, I agree most heartily with everything you just said or did." Aye aye! - "I'll get right on that sir, as soon as my break is over." Arrr! - This one is often confused with arrrgh, which is of course the sound you make when you sit on a belaying pin. "Arrr!" can mean, variously, "yes," "I agree," "I'm happy," "I'm enjoying this beer," "My team is going to win it all," "I saw that television show, it sucked!" and "That was a clever remark you or I just made." And those are just a few of the myriad possibilities of Arrr! Bilge rat ? The bilge is the lowest level of the ship. It?s loaded with ballast and slimy, reeking water. A bilge rat, then, is a rat that lives in the worst place on the ship. On TLAP Day ? A lot of guy humor involves insulting your buddies to prove your friendship. It?s important that everyone understand you are smarter, more powerful and much luckier with the wenches than they are. Since bilge rat is a pretty dirty thing to call someone, by all means use it on your friends. Lubber ? (or land lubber) This is the seaman?s version of land lover, mangled by typical pirate disregard for elocution. A lubber is someone who does not go to sea, who stays on the land. On TLAP Day ? More likely than not, you are a lubber 364 days of the year. But not if you?re talking like a pirate! Then the word lubber becomes one of the more fierce weapons in your arsenal of piratical lingo. In a room where everyone is talking like pirates, lubber is ALWAYS an insult. Smartly ? Do something quickly. On TLAP Day ? ?Smartly, me lass,? you might say when sending the bar maid off for another round. She will be so impressed she might well spit in your beer.