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Arriving with the Dawn - Part the 6th Interlude I, What Obi really thinks about

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Jedi_Knight_Hunter, Dec 2, 2002.

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  1. Sheila

    Sheila Jedi Master star 4

    Oct 6, 2002
    Very interesting. You raise a lot of questions here. Now we see that Qui-Gon's behavior is not a recent occurance, he is acting strangely unbalanced even while Xanatos is his padawan. I can't wait for more to be revealed. :)
  2. Jedi_Knight_Hunter

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 6, 2002
    I'm know where these guys are going, I'm don't know what paths they are taking yet.

    That being said, I will present Part the fourth, set in the now, tomorrow...[12/31]

    [edit] ok, maybe not...

    sorry 'bout that, had a funeral to attend and my birthday [0101] to celebrate...

    I'll try for tomorrow ;)
  3. Jedi_Knight_Hunter

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 6, 2002
    Thanks everyone for reviewing!

    * Part the Forth*

    Mostly Obi's thoughts, from his P.O.V.

    I'm awake?

    Why does that suprise me?

    Why should it suprise me?

    Oh, I remember now. I was falling, faster and faster, the sun was rising, the golden beams of light were shooting through fluffy clouds, breaking the light into a hundred thousand rainbows bouncing off the glass buildings. I was happy for the first time.

    Everything went black. I don't remember anything else.

    Where am I? We were always taught that when we became one with the force we would be drifting in a sea of blue, in perfect harmony with the force. Personally, I thought that always sounded kind of boring, like day- long meditation punishments. Besides, I see no others.

    It's lonely here.

    Is this Hell?

    There are no pits of fire or sulfur or brimstone here, no pain or suffering can be seen. Its just a void. An empty space filled with a sourceless light refracting through gigantic crystals suspended by nothingness.

    Maybe it's my own personal hell. All alone, cold and empty but for the crystals. Maybe my death was such a crime that I will have to suffer, alone, forever to wonder this desert of crystals. But wasn't I taught that there was no hell? I'm so confused; it seems that all I have been taught is wrong.

    So why am I awake?

    Death was suposed to be an eternal slumber right?

    Am I alive? or do I just exist?

    Unable to halt my thoughts, they continue upon their dark track.

    I exist, I am not alive

    I hate myself

    But, hate is of the darkside.

    A child of light,

    Never again

    For my darkness has always been my greater sin

    * Not a child of the light dear boy? I didn't know you wrote poetry*

    Dammit, I thought I got rid of you. This must be hell, you're back.

    *No, but He is gone*


    *Well, I'm assuming the sith in your head was male. That leaves just you and me.*

    Great, even in the force, I still have voices in my head to drive me insane. Do you have a name?


    Well then, you're Bob.


    Yes, Bob, like the planet.

    *Who would name a planet Bob?*

    Anyways, Bob, please Get OUT OF MY HEAD!!!

    *Geez, pushy are we not.*

    Don't tell me you're related to Yoda?

    Feed back very much appreciated!
  4. obi_ew

    obi_ew Jedi Master star 5

    Apr 14, 2002
    * slips even further into boiling pit of confusion * :D I thought Bob was Xan there for a minute! Wishful thinking I guess! :p Mighty intrigued here!
  5. Jedi_Suzuran

    Jedi_Suzuran Jedi Knight star 5

    May 22, 2002
    Confused as hell. :eek: Not unusual for me, I agree with master, though. :)
  6. Jedi_Knight_Hunter

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 6, 2002
    What exactly do ya'll find confusing?
  7. ObiLegolas

    ObiLegolas Jedi Youngling star 3

    May 15, 2002
    I'm confused too. What sith in Obi's head?

    But still I liked the post. It was very entertaining. I love how you had Obi name the voice "Bob"....heee hee and what planet is named "Bob"?
  8. AnakinsOnlyAngel

    AnakinsOnlyAngel Jedi Youngling

    Jan 11, 2003
    I like your writing a lot ^_^ A bit of angst, a touch of humour, perfect!

    FELICIA_ZEZILI Jedi Youngling star 3

    Aug 5, 2001
    I would so name my planet bob! Bod or Tad.

    I liked that it was interesting. Cant wait for more to find out exactly who Bob is and what is Qui-Gon's deal.

    Felicia Z.
  10. Lost_Silvery_Dragon

    Lost_Silvery_Dragon Jedi Youngling

    Jan 6, 2003

    Just a quick thank you... all of your comments let me know what needs to be worked into the story, and helps me improve my writing skills ( which , obiously sometimes need all the help I can get)

    on a side note, the planet Bob is mentioned in Titan, A.E. ( I think)
  11. ObiLegolas

    ObiLegolas Jedi Youngling star 3

    May 15, 2002
  12. Jedi_Knight_Hunter

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 6, 2002
    Short, sweet and to the point.
    Thanks everyone for the comments and the ups. When I post this, it may or may not be quite finished ( the post that is)
    (Xani p.o.v)

    "Hurt it must have, Lord DeCrion, that fall. When better are you, speak we must. Great concerns we have for the future of you."


    That means I'm going to live.

    I don't want to live? Do I? Maybe I do. I mean it's better than spending an eternity in hell. But maybe the temple is hell... I'm rambling... I must have picked that up from someone.

    He said future plans?

    "What plans?, could you possibly have for a guy like me? I'm the scum of the galaxy, remember?"

    "Scum, you are not. Forseen your return I had. Sent away you had to be."

    What? The troll deigned to put me through my personal hell?

    "How dare you?!?! I have suffered every minute since I went to Telos and saw my father ruthlessly slaughtered at the hands of Jinn! You knew what would happen, yet you did nothing to prevent the death of my father or the massacure that followed?"

    "Calm be you must. Relax and listen you shall. Tell you the truth of the vision I must."
  13. Jedi_Knight_Hunter

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 6, 2002
    "Before Master Jinn's padawan you were, foresaw, I did, turn to the darkside you would. Attempt to stop it, we did. Let you go to Telos, we did not."

    "Then how..."

    Whap! went Yoda's gimmer stick, right on my head.

    "Hey, what was that for?!?"

    "Interupted, you did, quiet, you must be. Tired you are, rest you should."

    I yawned. Funny, isn't it, how you don't feel one bit tired until someone suggests it to you.

    "In pain, you must be, shards of crystal, removed from your back, they were. Hit your head you did."

    I grimaced. I hadn't really felt the pain until he mentioned it. Damned mind games. Did I ever mention I hate that troll?

    "Lie back and listen, you shall. More to tell you, I have.

    "Wanted you to go to Telos, not. Persuaded against, Master Jinn, thought we had. Unfortunate, it was that learned to lie he had."

    Stopped he had. Bloody hell, now I'm starting to think like the troll. Not good this is!

    I slapped my forehead with the palm of my hand. 'Shut up...just shut up, I told my inner Yoda.

    He looked at me with amusement in his big green eyes...amusement with a hint of pity.

    "Hurt yourself you should not, my padawan, done enough damage, he has.

    "Master Jinn, told the council, he did, that going to Correllia, you were, a vacation to take..."

    I snorted. A vacation, him? That's a riot.

    "No comment did I require. Listen you must, or sleep you shall."

    I panicked 'NO! I don't want to sleep. I see things when I sleep '

    "Took you to Telos, he did, meet your father, he thought you must."

    " I foresaw that... I dreampt that a dark haired man was slaughtered infront of me, and I could do nothing."

    "Wondered we did, if gift of sight you had... knew not for sure, now we do.

    "Want Jedi, the Telosians did not. Hated the Jedi they did. Hated Master Jinn the most..."

    'No smart comments, no smart comments, no smart comments' ran through my mind as I bit down on my tongue.

    "Stole from them, he did, their prince."

    "Me." It came out with no infliction or emotion whatsoever.

    "When landed you did, demand your father did, your return to what was your right from birth."

    "I remember."

    Images flooded my mind. My father standing in the place garden pleading with my master to allow me to make up my own mind whether or not to stay with the Jedi, or to serve the Telosians as their prince. I remember being torn...but in the end, my father's pleas had swayed me to stay. Master Jinn, however would not be persuaded. In the end, I drew my sabre upon him and ordered him off planet. He left, only to return 6 months later with a small army of mercenaries and Jedi knights. My father and I rode out to meet him, (yes, we still use horses on Telos)and when we told him to leave, he cut my father down in cold blood.

    No warning. Nothing. Just tapped the cold black switch on his saber, and with a flick of his wrist, he sliced through his aged body as though nothing but air was their. He plummetted to the ground, as an apple falls from the tree, and in a flash, I flung my self off my horse and to his side. With his dying breathe, he told me, he loved me. I don't really remember what exactly happened next, but I clearly remember my sabre at Jinn's throat, telling him if he ever showed his face near me, I would kill him like the dog he was.

    Yoda had been quiet for a while. I looked at him, bringing my self out of my reminiscances...

    "What told us he did, the truth I suspect it was not."

    With a voice that could freeze the soul I spoke, "What pray-tell, did he tell you?"

    Yodaese is not my strong suit...all critism, comments, appreciated please!
  14. obi_ew

    obi_ew Jedi Master star 5

    Apr 14, 2002
    [face_laugh] I just loved that! Xan talking like Yoda in his head! Still have no clue what is going on here but I am enjoying the ride! :)
  15. Jedi_Knight_Hunter

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 6, 2002
    Uh...he's in the hospital and is actually talking to Yoda... :p, but he won't be doing that for a long time to come as I for one, am sick of typing in Yodaese.
  16. Lost_Silvery_Dragon

    Lost_Silvery_Dragon Jedi Youngling

    Jan 6, 2003
  17. Jedi_Knight_Hunter

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 6, 2002
  18. Jedi_Knight_Hunter

    Jedi_Knight_Hunter Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 6, 2002
    The next several parts will be from Obi's P.O.V, or rather, his diary's. It will start out fluffy, but move into angsty as it progresses through out the years.

    Diary of Obi-Wan

    Entry 1

    Age 12

    Dear Journal;

    I feel really stupid doing this. I mean, how do I know that no one will come in and still this. I live with Jedi you know, and Jedi are nothing if not curious.

    I don't see why I am writing in this, I really don't. I mean what's the point of writing my thoughts down? It's just odd. I don't like this. I got this stupid journal as a gift and I feel guilty if I don't use it, though.

    *Sigh* Woe is me.

    So I'm suposed to write my thoughts in here? Ok, I hope this is sealed with magic, or the force...

    My thoughts right now are centered one one thing. That stupid song!

    I'm blue da-bu-di dah-bu- di...dabu dee dabu di

    over and over again.

    That and do rainbow ponies really exist? What is a pony?

    Gotta Go, Saber training right now-

  19. ObiLegolas

    ObiLegolas Jedi Youngling star 3

    May 15, 2002
    hahahahahaha!!!!! 12 year old Obi was hillarious! Great post.
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