Tampa, FL As the shields go down and stinkbombs rain down on Docking Bay 1138, Edmontooine's troops move in...

You had to bring Star Trek into this, didn't ya?

Just couldn't help yourself...

 

Well Shattner is a Canadian after all.

 

A holonet image of Grand Admiral Jade appears on ALL holotransceivers, both enemy and friends


Master Knightstar, this is Grand Admiral Jade we have successfully achieved orbit of Edmontooine and have begun our assault. The hockey clones seem to be working and have the Canadiens completely confused...I await your order to begin ground assault...

 

Good work troops!!! We have them on the ru!!! Good idea in releasing the Tribbles...they will do well in the next Calgary Stampede!!!

 

You can run, but you can't hide. Send in the genetically modified beavers...

//A massive army of beavers, genetically modified to hone in on the cardiac rhythms of Americans from Tampa Bay, progress in indulating waves across the expanse of space separating the two warring factions. With uncany speed, the beavers go right for the hearts of the defenders, tearing them mercilessly to ribbons of defeat...

 

Release the clone hockey players Gov. Jade!! The Canadians will not have a change our clones are far superior as they make their own ice this time of year!!

 

He said "Beaver'" he hehe

 

(and Annya says MY humor is low-brow) Anyway...

Nice try, Canadians. But, the odds of Americans (heart-targeting beavers or no) losing a battle to a country full of people who don't lock their doors are 720 million to one.

 

Understood Master Knightstar
Jade pauses as one of the most feared things in the galaxy pushes him off the holotransmitter
Heh heh...I am the Great Cornholio...I need TP for my bunghole...

 

Troops!! we need to round up as many moose as possible and stash them in the area around Banff...then when they come looking for us, we will converge on them from Kananaskas and the surrounding mountains!!!

 

Hey!! I have a whole shipment of Moose Dung Guns in my cargo hold....Let's go!!!!

 

Who needs ice making clones when we have our own natural ice this time of year? ?
Confusing, this breed of American is.

Beavers. Attack!

 

Grins very evilly and keeps his mouth shut as he so wants to make a comment about the Beavers attacking

 

Treavers here, treavers there, treavers treavers everywhere. Beware...their numbers are so great that their mass can bee seen from outer space.

 

I have large numbers of squadrons of flamingos, flying in to straife the Canadians with coconut paddies and tangerines!!!

 

Gov Jade I have the Tampa Bay Lightening team members ready to fight under your command!!! Proceed as necessary...transport will be arriving on your ship soon!!!

 

Troops!! we need to round up as many moose as possible and stash them in the area around Banff...then when they come looking for us, we will converge on them from Kananaskas and the surrounding mountains!!!

Too bad Mon Calagari is in the way...

MWHAHAHAAAhahhahahahahaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!! They'll send you running home screaming "PLEASE DON'T DEACTIVATE ME!!!!!"

 

Smiles as the shuttle carrying the TB Lightning docks in the shuttle bay
Tell Capt Andreychuk and his forces to meet me on the bridge.

 

As the shuttle lands, the Tampa Bay Lightning players rip off their jerseys to show their CanadiAn uniforms underneath... you forget that most hockey players are CanadiAn!!!

# NAME HOMETOWN
4 Vincent Lecavalier Ile Bizard, Quebec
19 Brad Richards Murray Harbour, PEI
27 Tim Taylor 6-1 190 2.6.69 Stratford, Ontario
11 Chris Dingman Edmonton, Alberta
25 Dave Andreychuk Hamilton, Ontario
61 Cory Stillman Peterborough, Ontario
5 Jassen Cullimore Simcoe, Ontario
21 Cory Sarich Saskatoon,Saskatchewan
22 Dan Boyle Ottawa, Ontario
37 Brad Lukowich Cranbrook, B.C.
38 Darren Rumble Barrie Ontario
44 Nolan Pratt Ft. McMurray, Alberta
55 Darryl Sydor Edmonton, Alberta


You are beaten!!!! It is pointless to resist!!!

The Canadians swarm aboard and take command of the Star Destroyer.

*Indigo orders them to turn their guns on the Docking Bay. Set your weapons to "splatter" and fire all Egg Launchers at will!!*

 

Annya Latoure takes a time out to put munchkins to bed and to return to the battle on the morrow.

 

Uh..........
I think the Canadians won this round.

Gov. Jade, what was your tactician thinking?

 

Looks around and activates his last resort weapon

This is Jade calling Dark Helmet and the Spaceballs...descend on Canada and give them the rasberries...that means you too Lonestar...Take your Mog and get fighting!

 

Too bad Rick Moranis is Canadian too.

 

I know...I was shooting for the irony factor...

 

*gets to beating the Americans down with my giant slab of Canadian bacon*