Ask StompboxX

Oh boy oh boy oh boy. Things are getting verryyyy interesting indeed....

oneal: that was one post full of letters. significant letters. at least it's now in plain english. AND it doesn't use some weird alphabet or math equation.... LOL.

mr. ingining: afraid of mr. stompie, are you? fear is the power of the dark side.... as for mr. stompie being as sexy as Captain Stormball... that is debatable...

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master stompie wrote:

Jedi Ginny, you're obviously not the only Jedi in the universe. He seems to be another Jedi with strong empathic senses. Or maybe you're not as elusive as you think you are. Only goes to show that you can't be a Sith. You allowed yourself to become transparent be simply showing your affctions. And obviously, your scruffy-looking person isn't dense.

Also, it's highly possible that he's simply trying to rip off Harrison Ford. That one-liner is a classic, you know.

end quote

Dear Master Stompie,

Ah, I became transparent? Does that mean I became invisible? And the scruffy-looking... person... ain't mine. Or at least, not yet. Bwahaha. Or maybe he DID rip the line off from dear Harrison. How will I know the difference?

Lovingly yours,
The Other Skywalker.

 

Dear Mr. Stompboxx,

Hi! I'm a six-feet-four, 198 pound 19-year old insensitive loser of a man who is so very very much damn in love with a good friend of mine.

I met her thru not-very-normal circumstances, and she has always been a good friend to me. Come to think of it, she has been a good friend to everyone around her. Fans. Family. Relatives. Her annoying and unpredictable sister. Everyone, dammit.

I have even asked her out: we have been out twice, alone. I was with her when I drooled over Keanu Reeves' cool costume and Yuen Wo-Ping's martial art choreo. I was with her when you tried to spy on us in Megamall.

But she has a boyfriend, as I so unceremoniously found out. But I can't giveup.I love her too much. You see, she's cute, sweet, smiling, kind, gentle, almost-too-good to be true.

My question is: should I still let her know that I have special feelings for her? Should I hang around like a vulture waiting for the right time? Should I still call her? Should I still communicate with her? Can I hit on her sister? Can I hit on Thunder Thigs Jopay? Isn't this so parallel to your situation, too?

Please help.

Regards,
Rain Rain Go Away

 

Posted by: StompboXX

And yeah, an invisibility trenchcoat looks better than a cloak. Then again, who'll be able to notice the difference anyway?

Ummm, everyone... because your head will be floating in mid-air if you're wearing an invisibility trenchcoat as opposed to an invisibility cloak that you can pull over your head like in the Harry Potter books/movies.

 

hat_tr1ck posted:

Ummm, everyone... because your head will be floating in mid-air if you're wearing an invisibility trenchcoat as opposed to an invisibility cloak that you can pull over your head like in the Harry Potter books/movies.

Yeah, but no one would know if that was a trenchcoat, or simply a cloak that one forgot to pull over his/her head. Either way, you'd have a floating head.

BTW, you can read "floating head" in another context. hahaha. PG mode, PG mode.

 

the_jedi_rainjin wrote:

Dear Mr. Stompboxx,

Hi! I'm a six-feet-four, 198 pound 19-year old insensitive loser of a man who is so very very much damn in love with a good friend of mine.

I met her thru not-very-normal circumstances, and she has always been a good friend to me. Come to think of it, she has been a good friend to everyone around her. Fans. Family. Relatives. Her annoying and unpredictable sister. Everyone, dammit.

I have even asked her out: we have been out twice, alone. I was with her when I drooled over Keanu Reeves' cool costume and Yuen Wo-Ping's martial art choreo. I was with her when you tried to spy on us in Megamall.

But she has a boyfriend, as I so unceremoniously found out. But I can't giveup.I love her too much. You see, she's cute, sweet, smiling, kind, gentle, almost-too-good to be true.

My question is: should I still let her know that I have special feelings for her? Should I hang around like a vulture waiting for the right time? Should I still call her? Should I still communicate with her? Can I hit on her sister? Can I hit on Thunder Thigs Jopay? Isn't this so parallel to your situation, too?

Ahh...another problem that's close to home. You have a big problem here. The indicator:

I was with her when I drooled over Keanu Reeves' cool costume

Sorry dude. She thinks you're a member of the federacion because of that. Hahaha.

While you try to convince her that you don't belong to the same league as Allan K., try to be her friend. Be a vulture if you like. But remember, there are other Sexbombs in the ocean.

But don't touch Cynthia.

 

Can I have some money?

 

Er, I already hit on Cynthia...hahahaha...

So, I'll be a lying, cheating scum of a vulture and be the fallout guy? Nice.

 

mr stompbox sir,
how does one become a lying, cheating stealing vulture?
are you the expert to ask regarding this kind of topic?
i'm sorry but i have absolutely no experience regarding this kind of thing,
i hope with your infinite knowledge regarding all things sexual, you can endow me with your gifts

 

to corporal calamity

in exchange for what?

 

Sir, sir, sir

Master Stompie sir, i have a question,

"if you had an invisibility trenchcoat, and your floating head (hee hee hee) was visible, would it help if you had an invisibility hat? or would you need an invisibility ski mask?"

another question: "now that your gig in mayrics is finished, would you have more time to concentrate on other 'pursuits'? you do have a working landline right?"

 

mr stompbox sir,

"if the jedi rainjin is done with his sexbomb girls, is it ok to hit on them too?"

"do i have to wait till he's done or is it ok to go behind his back"

its not for me, its for a friend, i have absolutely no knowledge regarding this, i have yet to learn from your great wisdom

 

mr stompbox sir,

"how close to home does it hit?
did it hurt?
were you substantially affected by the incident?
will it immobilize you completely in times of distress?
will it cause you to have epileptic fits when faced with the prospect of your prospect?"

 

mr stompbox sir,

"why shouldn't he touch cynthia?
is she untouchable?
is there something wrong with touching her?
will she get hurt?
will you get hurt?
does she have a contagious disease?
do you have a contagious disease?

 

mr stompbox sir,

"why are the sexbombs in the ocean?
do they like it there?
do you like them there?
whats it like to be a vulture?
is it because you like to fly?"

 

Sir, Sir
Mr Stompie Sir,
i have a question...

love problem: "If mr X calls up miss M, and Miss M talks to mr X, and mr X is happy, what will it take for mr X to call up miss M again and ask her out to have D, or at least perhaps just for a few minutes over C in SB. Now if mr X is worried about miss M not wanting to go out with mr X because of mr W, and he keeps thinking about it and not picking up the P and dialing her N, he will forever be thinking but without confirming the possibilities of his friendship with miss M only because he is ...
a) afraid
b) scared
c) terrified
d) gay
e) all of the above

 

love problem number 2

"If x is equal to 2 minus 1 then x plus 1 and y is equal to x plus 1 then x is equal to y if the following is true:
a) x is not afraid of 1
b) 1 is afraid of x
c) x asks y 1 wont go out with him
d) 1 is avoiding x but we are not sure y
e) we cannot compute y unless we prove the above equations

 

the_jedi_rainjin wrote:

So, I'll be a lying, cheating scum of a vulture and be the fallout guy? Nice.

No. You go on and live your life. If you get lucky, then you get lucky. If not, touch luck. But there are other fish on the ocean.

Fish, okay? Not whales, dolphins, etc. You might get the ire of Greenpeace.

 

anakiningining wrote:

mr stompbox sir,
how does one become a lying, cheating stealing vulture? are you the expert to ask regarding this kind of topic?

Below-the-belt question.

i'm sorry but i have absolutely no experience regarding this kind of thing, i hope with your infinite knowledge regarding all things sexual, you can endow me with your gifts

Only if you join the Outbound Flight project.

 

oneal wrote:

Master Stompie sir, i have a question,

"if you had an invisibility trenchcoat, and your floating head (hee hee hee) was visible, would it help if you had an invisibility hat? or would you need an invisibility ski mask?"

Common sense is an oxymoron.

another question: "now that your gig in mayrics is finished, would you have more time to concentrate on other 'pursuits'? you do have a working landline right?"

Maybe, but now that I have a day job as a writer/producer for a cable channel, I'll have to resort to Plan B.

 

I will not entertain those other questions by the Anakin guy and Oneal. (And I bet the latter has a good reason for flooding this forum. SWP points perhaps, you sneaky sonuvagun you)

oneal, again, you may ask me anything except math-related questions.

 

Posted by StompboXX

"Maybe, but now that I have a day job as a writer/producer for a cable channel, I'll have to resort to Plan B. "

Who did you have to sleep with to get the job? Can I get a job there too without sleeping with anyone?

 

"why shouldn't he touch cynthia?
is she untouchable?
is there something wrong with touching her?
will she get hurt?
will you get hurt?
does she have a contagious disease?
do you have a contagious disease?

No, but she does have a Kiko and a BF to keep moi and anyone else from doing that. Damn, she's hot!

Master Stompboxx, I have a question: what if I find out that Cynthia (or any other Sexbomb Girl) is a Star Wars junkie? Should I bring them to the assembly? Are you sure Ginny's Boys would behave themselves if I did? Would you behave yourself, Master Stompie? Perhaps if a certain miss was there, you would, right, coz yer eyes (and glasses) would be glued to her?

 

Plan B, master Stompie? Is this another shameless plug of your upcoming, much-awaited, super-kinaiinipan indie album? Or are you really severing your ties with her? Why?

If you don't, I promise I'll bring the entire group, and Lola Joy Cancio to an SWP Meeting..CHARING!

 

hat_tr1ck wrote:

Who did you have to sleep with to get the job? Can I get a job there too without sleeping with anyone?

I didn't sleep with anyone. I had to look good for their Programming Director though. You know, my appeal is limited to people of certain preferences. Haven't tried Twi'lek, though.

 

Well, I'm all for the_jedi_rainjin here touching Cynthia - as long as he gives us a complete and thorough review on what happened and where. Hehehehehe...