Before At What Price, Peace? Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon. More thanks posted.

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Valairy Scot, Feb 17, 2006.

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  1. Valairy Scot Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Sep 16, 2005
    star 5
    Title: At What Price, Peace?
    Author(s): Valairy_Scot
    Timeframe: late JA
    Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Qui-Gon Jinn
    Genre: Angst, h/c
    Keywords: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Qui-Gon Jinn
    Summary: On a mission to mediate a peace treaty, our two Jedi find things going too well. Is it a set up, or is it a peace to be sealed by something neither Jedi could have imagined? What is the price of peace, and is the price too high?




    At What Price, Peace?

    ?What the Force should I do?? Qui-Gon cried out, silently. He usually had answers, or would find them. But this was unprecedented, tragic, and unanswerable. His heart ached and he didn?t know if it would ever heal. He wasn?t sure he even wanted it to.

    It had started, a routine call before the Council, a routine mission. He could sense Obi-Wan?s disquiet during their briefing, the young man stood straight and silent, as a Padawan should. Qui-Gon had spared a glance sideways at him, ready to raise an eyebrow to settle the young man down, but his emotion was internal, not displayed before the Council. Obi-Wan turned his eyes to his master and blinked, as if surprised that his master was aware of what he felt.

    Daring to relax, for the minute, Qui-Gon let Obi-Wan drop out of his awareness. They would speak later. Obi-Wan seemed to softly shut a door, as if on a sleeping being, as their bond quieted and the apprentice shut himself away and switched into an awareness of the Living Force. Now Qui-Gon was troubled; his apprentice was not normally attuned to the Living Force ? his disquiet, then, was related to his Force perceptions, the Unifying Force.

    After they were dismissed and the Council doors closed behind them, Qui-Gon stopped and faced the young Jedi. ?What is troubling you??

    ?I?am not sure?? he answered upon reflection, raising eyes to his master?s. Seeing there the patience, almost a threat, that there they would remain until Obi-Wan spoke freely, he sighed. A Padawan was not allowed to lie, obfuscate, or speak less than the truth at any time. While his unwillingness to speak did not meet any of those criteria, it did skirt too close for comfort.

    ?I have a bad feeling about this, Master,? he admitted. He waited for Qui-Gon?s smile, the admonishment to live in the present and stop worrying about the future. It was a conversation they had frequently enough that they merely needed to exchange looks without the need to actually exchange words. But Qui-Gon merely nodded and he laid a hand on Obi-Wan?s shoulder.

    ?It is more than your usual worrying, Obi-Wan. I know you too well. It is different this time. What do you sense?


    ?A great?silence, like everything went ? blank,? he tried to explain, shaking his head. ?I don?t understand it, Master, but it is there, and there is sorrow.?

    ?Whose sorrow??

    ?I ? I don?t know.? That was the truth, he really didn?t know. But somehow, he suspected, it was Qui-Gon?s.

    Deep blue eyes gazed deeply into blue-gray eyes, and accepted his words. ?There is often sorrow during and after a mission. This is a lesson you should have learned by now, my young apprentice. We can hope to settle disputes peacefully, guard the weak against those who would prey on them, but we can never repair the wounds of those we help. We cannot ban pain with the Force; we can only try to prevent its happening.?

    ?One can only help to shape a brighter future and bring healing to the wounds of the past,? Obi-Wan recited gently. It wasn?t really the proper saying, but he liked it better this way. Qui-Gon must have approved, for his lips curved in a smile and he patted his shoulder. ?Well said, my young one. Well said.?

    They left hours later.

    **

    ?Will he wake?? Qui-Gon whispered, hands clutching at the blankets covering the still figure, eyes never leaving the face below his. Lashes were closed over blue-gray eyes, hiding the light behind them. The serious look that so often exploded into joyous grins was gone, the face smooth in rest. ?Does he feel pain??

    ?We don?t know
  2. Mind_Tricked Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 1, 2005
    star 1
    Very nice start,

    Wake up, little one; spare me from an empty future without you in it.

    -that was beautiful. And sad...

    I liked how you described their conversation after the first meeting. It was so.. fluent. Great job!

    Can't wait to read what happened there and what made Obi sacrifice himself!
  3. VaderLVR64 Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2004
    star 8
    Oh beautifully done! =D= But you didn't tell me you posted this! [face_shame_on_you] Now, you know I like to read everything my Padawans post! ;)
  4. kenobiwanobi Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 26, 2005
    star 3
  5. Fluff-Slayer Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 12, 2005
    star 2
    What a clever comparison.

    Altogether, it was very well-woven. The dialogue was quite realistic, and Qui-Gon's sorrow feels real. Though you've left us with a cliffy. o_O

    It will be interesting to see where you go with this.

    Please update soon!

  6. Just_Jill Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 17, 2002
    star 3
    Very intreging beginning. I'm definitely interested in knowing what happened - and why the people reacted the way they did.

    Just Jill
  7. Gkilkenny Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2004
    star 4

    This is a very moving story.=D=

    So much feeling between them, and Obi-wan sensing
    that this, whatever it is , was coming.[face_worried]

    Qui-gon do not give up on Obi, he will return to the land of the living.
    He must or I'll cry:_|

  8. MASTER_KAYM Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 3, 2004
    star 1
    This story is very interesting from the start!! POor Obi, I hope he'll wake up :(
  9. SakuraTsukikage Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 24, 2005
    star 4
    Wow, what an incredible way to start a story. You definitely have me hooked.

    Your language is beautiful in this. You characterize Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon so well--their banter with each other, and then the sadness of Qui-Gon's musings.

    There are so many beautiful bits to this I don't know what parts to quote, but I especially liked:

    He now knew common wisdom was wrong, the Jedi did feel emotion. The proof was beside him in the trembling hand, the catch in the voice, and the unshed tears in the eyes.

    Not too much and not too little, and it gets across Qui-Gon's sadness perfectly. *sniff* :_|

    Wake up, little one; spare me from an empty future without you in it. I shouldn?t love you, Jedi are supposed to remain free from attachments, but how can a master not love his padawan, when the master is I and the padawan is you...please, come back.

    So beautiful and heartbreaking. :_| :_| Your wording is incredible.

    You were learning so much, growing so fast. I was looking forward to standing beside you, Jedi Knight Kenobi. Will I lighting your funeral pyre, my Padawan, sometime soon, instead?

    Heartrendingly well-described. I'm so worried about Obi-Wan . . . [face_worried] Please tell me he'll be okay!

    It was because of one young man?s firm belief that a better future lay ahead for those for whom he?d sacrificed himself.

    That's so Obi-Wan. And now I really want to know what happened!
  10. Star_Drifter Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 18, 2005
    star 3
    ?I have a bad feeling about this, Master,? he admitted. He waited for Qui-Gon?s smile, the admonishment to live in the present and stop worrying about the future...But Qui-Gon merely nodded and he laid a hand on Obi-Wan?s shoulder.

    ?It is more than your usual worrying, Obi-Wan. I know you too well. It is different this time. What do you sense?

    ?A great?silence, like everything went ? blank,? he tried to explain, shaking his head. ?I don?t understand it, Master, but it is there, and there is sorrow.?

    ?Whose sorrow??

    ?I ? I don?t know.? That was the truth, he really didn?t know. But somehow, he suspected, it was Qui-Gon?s.


    You were right, Obi-Wan... :(

    What a great story! There is so much to discover about the planet, and what happened to Obi-Wan to put him in this state! :)

    More, when you can, please! [face_batting]

    Star

  11. Bastet Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 30, 1999
    star 4
    Oh dear, poor Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan. :(

    Why is Obi in a coma, what happened?!

    Wake up, little one; spare me from an empty future without you in it. I shouldn?t love you, Jedi are supposed to remain free from attachments, but how can a master not love his padawan, when the master is I and the padawan is you...please, come back. :_|

    I love this, Valairy_Scot, please post more soon! [face_praying]
  12. LilyHobbitJedi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 29, 2005
    star 5
    Oh, this is so sad. :_| Poor Obi-Wan being the scapegoat. This is excellent, and I can't wait to find out more. =D= =D=
  13. kenobiwanobi Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 26, 2005
    star 3
    PM me with updates please.
  14. LilQui-Gon Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 29, 2004
    star 2
    I hope you didn't forget about this story. It's too good to be left unfinished. :D
  15. Kestrel_Kenobi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Sep 26, 2005
    star 4
    Beautifully written, but so sad.

    Poor Qui-Gon... :(

    I'd love to see this continued! [face_batting]

  16. KELIA Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 26, 2005
    star 6
    Oh, this was beautifully written.

    I can just feel Qui-Gon's anguish.

    I hope Obi wakes up soon.

    Nice job

    =D= =D= =D= =D=
  17. Valairy Scot Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Sep 16, 2005
    star 5
    Chapter 2 Sealed in Blood


    The negotiations resumed at mid-morning, the two sides happily trading clauses and sub-clauses back and forth as they pounded out an agreement. The two Jedi had no need to be involved; they were relegated to being mere observers.

    During mid-meal break, Obi-Wan said he wanted to stretch his legs and headed off while Qui-Gon found a quiet spot to meditate. He had been tempted to accompany his padawan, but had decided against it. Obi-Wan hadn?t returned when the negotiations resumed. Qui-Gon was surprised, but his absence seemed to go unmarked and it was long evident that neither Jedi was actually needed.

    In Qui-Gon?s long years, he had never seen a complex negotiation so speedily and happily completed. The agreement was ready for signatures before the expected termination of the day?s meeting. Both sides agreed to a brief recess, during it Qui-Gon slipped into a quiet corridor and contacted the Temple.

    ?Didn?t Obi-Wan tell you?? the surprised voice of Jocasta Nu asked. ?He contacted me just a short while ago and I passed on what we had found. All I could find was an obscure legend about during a time of trouble, a cloaked god will return bearing a staff of light to bring healing to his people. There?s some confusion about the name of this god, but it?s most commonly known as T?wa-Won. Phonetically, either of your names would sound similar.?

    ?Yes, interesting, but obviously there?s more to it than just that,? Qui-Gon said; for some reason his heart was beating fast.

    ?There is,? Jocasta said reluctantly. ?That?s what Obi-Wan said; he asked me to dig deeper and try to find out if there was more to it than just that. The legend says that the god will bring lasting peace by sealing the pact in blood. The initial translation was ?a drop of blood,? which is what I told Obi-Wan. You could hear him practically trying to think of a painless way to prick his finger. Or yours.?

    They both, almost, grinned at that. Obi-Wan?s distaste for mess, which even one drop of blood would be by his standards, was nothing new to either of them. Not new, either, was either or both of them suffering from something at least a little painful on many missions ? it was an unusual Jinn-Kenobi mission that didn?t end with one or both of them visiting the Healers Ward for some bandaging or treatment.

    Jocasta?s voice grew grim. ?However, I dug deeper and a more accurate translation in my view is that the god will bring lasting peace by sacrificing himself, or in a variant version, by his blood being spilled by another and his blood sealing the pact for all eternity. But it?s not just a drop ? Qui-Gon, it?s ?the god?s lifeblood.??

    ?By the Force,? Qui-Gon swore, and switched his comlink over to contact Obi-Wan. ?Padawan, where are you? Why haven?t you been in touch with me??

    ?Master, I?m just coming in the door,? came the calm reply. Qui-Gon could just see the slight raise of one eyebrow, the carefully studied look on his face belied by the tension behind his eyes as he picked up on Qui-Gon?s apprehension. ?I haven?t had time to contact you, yet. Guess one of us will have to bleed some. Apparently, you know what I just found out.?

    ?Yes, the legend ? the sacrifice, everything.? Qui-Gon tried to be calm, but his heart was pounding.

    ?Sacrifice? What sacrifice?? Now Obi-Wan sounded surprised. ?A drop of the god?s blood seals the deal is all; I was wondering which of us is expected to play that role.?

    ?There will be no role-playing for either of us,? Qui-Gon said sternly. ?Why don?t I see you, if you?re coming in the front doorway??

    ?I came through the side doorway,? Obi-Wan said quietly, ?and Qui-Gon,? he gulped, ?I think I know what you meant about sacrifice. I?m in the room, and, uh, I guess I get to seal the treaty they just signed - .? The comlink went silent.

    **

    Qui-Gon brushed back a strand of silky hair that had slipped over the bandage around Obi-Wan?s head. He had known immediately how serious the head wound was ? it wasn?t the blood
  18. MASTER_KAYM Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 3, 2004
    star 1
    :eek::eek::eek:

    What?? Noooooo!! Obi, why do you always have sacrifice yourself?? :_|

    I hope he lives :(

    Excellent chapter! =D= Please update soon!
  19. Just_Jill Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jul 17, 2002
    star 3
    A very interesting twist.

    Though I have the feeling that if Qui-Gon were not who he was (IE: Jedi), their lasting peace would be the peace of death - as everyone involved were VERY messily slaughtered.

    I still think it's a good idea.

    Bother.

    A very nice chapter, though. Well written.

    Just Jill
  20. kenobiwanobi Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 26, 2005
    star 3
    Once again this is an amazing beautiful piece...and I am glad to hear nthere is more....Great job!:D
  21. Ara-gon Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 31, 2005
    star 2
    Gasp! Ahhhhhhhh! Don't they research these things before they go?

    You have a lovely style. I liked how you moved us back and forth in time, meeting in the middlish.

    There's more! Hooray! If you do PMs, I'd love one.

  22. Bastet Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 30, 1999
    star 4
    :_| No, Obi-Wan! He's so noble and self-sacrificing! :( But that's why we love him! :_|

    I'm so glad to hear there's three more chapters, I can't wait!
  23. Lady_Snow_Kaguya Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 9, 2005
    star 1
    O_____o this is why I dislike politicians...thanks, I'm now terrified..LOL, jk. But wow, what a decidedly creepy way of doing busieness...
  24. Mind_Tricked Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 1, 2005
    star 1
    It works great like that: terrifying, classic angst and extremely touching especially in Qui-Gon parts!

    Yet I will be very pleased to see more of this. Now your powerful writing leaves us with the sense of despair, but if you have anything to add to the plot, don't hesitate a second!

    Great job!
    =D=
  25. Gkilkenny Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 27, 2004
    star 4


    I am definitely in for the read.

    Beautiful Obi-wan as usual sacrificing him self for Qui-Gon
    I hope Qui-Gon appreciates it and

    SAVE HIM QUI_GON!!!!![face_praying]
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