Before Attachment of the Bride--Qui-gon, Obi-Wan, OCs---Completed 2/24

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by DarthIshtar, Feb 6, 2007.

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  1. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Note: This is a sequel to the story Cruel and Unusual Romance, which I wrote in honor of my good friend Noelie. It introduced a few things. One was the principle of Jedi curing love by making the Order members go on one blind date a year. Another was Lady Carmyn Delairs, the Goth daughter of the Corellian Ambassador to Coruscant. Another was Mace's frantically-non-physical involvement with a Wookiee. But most amusingly of all, it introduced the Noelaverse. Starring Noela Ovorp and a host of other amusing and strange people. No, she's not a Mary Sue. She's not created by Noelie. Noelie has pitched in on so many aspects of that universe and has been writing stories for this for so long that it's hard to separate the Noelaverse from her brilliance. Noela's sisters are based on two of Noelie's sisters...and me. I won't say which is which.

    Now, since it's been a year since I came up with her, I'm writing the sequel to Cruel and Unusual Romance. I give you...

    ATTACHMENT OF THE BRIDE
    *****
    "I think we should live happily ever after. It should be a hair-raising experience." ~Howl's Moving Castle
    *****
    "Milady," Qui-Gon Jinn said frankly, "I do this under protest."

    In theory, the woman curled up on the chair across the tailor's workshop from him was supposed to be there for moral support. It was only fair, since he was doing the same for her in many aspects of this entire nightmare. Theoretically, the least she could do was to show some sympathy.

    Instead, she was hiding a broad grin behind her datapad and doing her best to look innocent. The effect was rather ruined by the fact that he could hear her giggling rather unabashedly.

    "It could be worse," Noela protested. "You're doing this for a good cause, it will make me very happy and you'll avoid making a fool of yourself."

    "None of those is convincing me that I should be looking this ridiculous," Qui-Gon protested, tugging at the sleeves of his dress shirt. "It's not Jedi, it's tight-fitting and it's identical to Liam's."

    She nodded, but still did not lower the datapad, which meant that she was still having a good laugh at his expense. "I'm missing the part where this is a bad thing," she admitted.

    He sent her a vaguely amused smile. "I don't want anyone mixing the two of us up at the wedding," he explained.

    She rolled her eyes. "Unless Liam decides to look like something out of a romance holo by the end of the week, I doubt it will happen. Besides, you'll be wearing a robe over the top."

    Qui-Gon shrugged the outer jacket off, then slung it over his arm. "It's a good point, j'm," he conceded, "but when I agreed to give you away at your wedding, you never mentioned that I would be choked up for more than one reason."

    Finally, the datapad lowered and she stood, crossing to him so she could unfasten the top button of the high-collared shirt. "You're just used to wearing the Jedi tunic, which is anything but high-collared," she reminded. "And a little suffering will do you good."

    "I don't suppose any of Liam's family is suffering this way?" he countered.

    "Of course not," she said. "His father died and he only has sisters."

    He nodded as if he understood any of this. "Are any of your sisters in similar straits?"

    "No," she conceded, "and Mere is determined to wear something that will give Uncle Qui-Gon a heart attack."

    That seemed fairly typical of the petite redhead who had been alternately endearing herself and driving him crazy since the age of six. She was now close to thirty, but still found Qui-torture a worthy form of entertainment.

    "And Liam?" he challenged.

    "Liam will be wearing the same thing as you," she assured him. "So there will be at least one other happily miserable man in my wedding party. Are you happy now?"

    "Nearly," he sighed, retreating into the dressing room so he could change.

    Once the curtain was pulled, he practically clawed his way out of the stiff, high-collared button-down shirt that had probably been outlawed as a form of extreme torture in most sec
  2. nickenobi-nz Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 14, 2005
    star 1
    Lol, our poor boys, it's really not their sort of thing, is it?!

    Nicely done, very cute and funny!=D=
  3. Noelie Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2005
    star 4
    Poor Boys indeed....and it is going to get a LOT worse before it gets anybetter.

    :p
  4. princess_of_naboo Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 9, 2000
    star 4
    This looks like like a masterpiecce in the making. :D

    Can you PM me when you update?


    Thanks for telling me about this, Noelie!
  5. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    nickenobi-nz--It really isn't, but they'll be nice to anyone. Thanks!

    Noelie--Very much so, I believe. :)

    princess_of_naboo--LOL, thanks! That's always good to hear. And yes.
    *****
    In theory, Liam was supposed to have this entire week off. After all, there were friends and even a few relatives coming in from most sectors of the Galaxy. There were final fittings to be done, vows to finish writing, festivities to attend and too many holoshill interviews to count.

    In theory, he was supposed to have been spared the nightmare of having to work as well, but post-production on his latest holo, Attachment, Actually had run longer than expected and they were demanding that he finish some refilming before he get anything else done.

    It would have been bad form to tell the lot of them to take a flying leap. It would have been even worse to fake double pneumonia until the moment the wedding was scheduled to start.

    So, instead, he paid the price of his three-week hiatus for the honeymoon by working mornings. Ansra had offered to call in a bomb threat, but he had reminded her that it would lose its effectiveness after a few days. Not to mention, she would probably get herself arrested by the Republic Bureau of Investigation and that would almost certainly mean that she would be missing the wedding.

    The day?s shooting schedule had been arduous at best, but he had worked as hard as possible and taken the criticism of the director with patience and fairly good spirits.

    Finally, Culas glanced over at him and let out a typically dramatic sigh. ?All right,? he said grudgingly. ?I suppose that I?ve worked you all hard enough for one week. I?ll have the call lists sent out to everyone except Liam by tonight.?

    He managed to restrain a massive sigh of relief, but dipped his head in acknowledgment of Jorj Culas? occasional compassion.

    ?Senoe,? Culas responded with a grin. ?If you show your ugly face around here for the next month, I?ll yank you from the project.?

    He had to grin at that and momentarily wondered if Master Jinn?s equally ugly face would be allowed on set with the right amount of bribery. ?As ordered,? he conceded with an air of wounded pride. ?If I don?t see you and Ansra the day after tomorrow, I?ll yank myself from the project.?

    ?As ordered,? Culas countered with a broad grin. ?You?ll make it worth my while, correct??

    He nodded solemnly. ?I have at least five lonely female friends coming,? he assured his oldest business associate. ?I?m sure at least one of them will find you amusing.?

    ?Good,? Culas said shortly. ?Now, get out of here before...?

    He was already out of the soundstage door by the time the sentence finished.

    ?That didn?t take long,? Ansra teased, falling into step with him. ?What?s the rush??

    He turned an unamused look on her. ?I have less than forty hours to get myself and my affairs in order for my marriage,? he reminded. ?What?s not the rush??

    ?Good point,? she conceded. ?I suppose I should have asked what the immediate rush was.?

    ?Retrieving my oldest sister and two nieces from the spaceport,? he supplied. ?They?ll be landing in an hour and I still have to get out of this blasted studio.?

    That alone promised to take half an hour, since the press coverage of the upcoming event didn?t seem to be restricted to the day of the wedding.

    ?Do you need a diversion?? she asked cheerfully.

    ?No bomb threats,? he said immediately and sternly.

    Ansra snorted, but she didn?t dispute the claim. ?You?re no fun,? she accused.

    He was saved the bother of having to respond by the sight of who was waiting outside his dressing room.

    ?Noela,? Ansra greeted. ?Isn?t it bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding??

    ?I don?t think that applies to the entire week,? Noela retorted with a grin. ?Besides, I thought we could save time and head to the spaceport together.?

    ?Great idea,? he commended genuinely, grabbing her wrist and pulling her in for a quick kiss. ?That way, we won?t have to track you
  6. Noelie Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2005
    star 4
    [face_laugh] You my dear are a great fibber.. the one person that wasn't going to show up did..and the one that was to be there..isn't.

    I love the bomb threat idea.. lol. ATTACHMENT? Who wrote the screen play? Liam isn't required to wear a wig and a beard is he?

    And Poor Poor Mace...........still worried about the wookie.

    Edit: Jorj Culas? [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh] [face_laugh]
  7. princess_of_naboo Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 9, 2000
    star 4
    I want to know more about the holofilm! :p

    Yoda is so mean to Mace.

    Lovely update!
  8. brodiew Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 2005
    star 5
    Excellent story, Ish. From the very fist line I knew that you had Qui-Gon's voice down pat. It follwed through the entire post. Now I know where Obi-Wan got his regal air.

    you also potrayed Qui-Gon's discomfort at his tux wihtout it taking over the story or becoming too campy. This was a nice story showing the trials(small ones) that we go through for the we love. Yes, no doubt Qui-Gon loves Noela in his own way.

    Add me to the Pm list. I have to know how this wedding goes down. Obi-Wan was fun too. That should be interesting.
  9. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    By the time Qui-Gon returned to the Temple, he could see the immediate effects of the impending wedding. Yoda was looking particularly smug, which meant that he had made the necessary arrangements for the escorts without compassion or discrimination. Mace was looking vaguely dazed and panicked, which meant that Yoda had decided to make him suffer more than usual. Perhaps it even meant that the Wookiee Obi-Wan had met a few months before would be making another appearance.

    A few other Padawans, Knights and even Masters seemed to sending him furtive glances as if they were waiting for him to lose his cool. After all, his closest friend was being ?stolen? by a look-alike actor of all things.

    It wasn?t to say that Qui-Gon disapproved of him in the slightest, since he was only too able to give Noela all the happiness that she deserved. He was not, however, deaf and blind to the public theory on exactly how he was supposed to feel about the matter.

    There was a popular theory going around that he was in love with the Senator from Alderaan. An even more popular hypothesis was that he would confess his wild, passionate and rather torrid love for her at the altar. He had a sneaking suspicion that a few of the invited guests, Force-sensitive or not, were going just to see what mayhem might break loose.

    Obi-Wan, at least, seemed to be looking forward to the event. It would be a good chance to see his friend Carmyn again and certainly was an excuse to enjoy himself in a more informal setting than that which the Temple provided. The fact that he had to wear dress robes and smile for the holocam seemed to have no effect.

    It certainly was dampening Qui-Gon?s enthusiasm but by the time he reached their quarters, he was determined to follow his Padawan?s excellent example. This turned out to be a prudent choice, since he entered the living room to find Obi-Wan doing some kind of tortured stumbling.

    For a young man who was quickly becoming adept in the classic lightsaber forms, his apprentice could be remarkably fumble-footed in certain situations. Whatever madness had overtaken him was affecting his balance and common sense.

    It took Qui-Gon a long moment to realize that this delirium was actually Obi-Wan valiantly trying to do the Alderaanian waltz.

    Obi-Wan apparently did not notice his Master?s return, since he continued staggering around, his eyes scrunched tight and his arms held stiffly in the dancing position. A few times, he came dangerously close to knocking things over, but in each instance, he missed by millimeters. It was a surprise that Qui-Gon went unnoticed, since he was cringing with every near-miss.

    Finally, he could take it no longer. ?You do realize that the waltz is supposed to be in three, don?t you??

    Obi-Wan swung wildly around, eyes flying open in panic as he recognized his Master. Qui-Gon was so amused by the reaction that he didn?t notice what exactly his Padawan?s arm had encountered. The moment the glass shattered, however, he realized what exactly it had been.

    The Ewok statue was something that someone must have designed after only having heard of the little furry monsters. The sculpture was only an approximate rendition and Qui-Gon wouldn?t have been able to recognize it if it hadn?t been dressed in traditional garb. The difference was that all the Ewoks he had seen had not been holding severed human heads in their furry little paws.

    Noela had found it at a glassblower?s shop on Raltiir and had sent it to him in some fit of nostalgia. After all, they had shared a guilty fascination in the group called Ewok Genocide since the early days of their friendship.

    Judging from the mortified and rather crestfallen look on Obi-Wan?s face, he remembered that too well.

    He was not exactly sure how to react, since it was obvious that Obi-Wan was looking for some kind of response. The loss of that particular knickknack was hardly devastating. It was such a godsawful piece of junk that he should have scrapped long ago, but it seemed to amuse Noela
  10. Noelie Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2005
    star 4
    well.. the theories and the rumors are rampant.

    I stlll love Obi-Wan figuring out the Waltz. I like Qui-Gon suggesting Obi-Wan can break other stuff....

    Although the choice of wedding present seems more a curse!


    And I still have no idea how the sisters are going to live past pushing the bride too far.
  11. nickenobi-nz Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Dec 14, 2005
    star 1
    Obi-Wan grinned. ?Well, according to the rumors, which of us the bride will choose for a last pre-marital fling."
    Oh, LOL!!! :D [face_laugh] :D That is just too funny! :)

    Personally I'd pick Obi-Wan, but I can see why some woulf pick Qui.

    I so can't wait for the wedding.
  12. brodiew Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 2005
    star 5
    I'm really enjoying this Ish. It is nice to read something light and fluffy. But i have give you kudos because I love how you write Qui-Gon. It is Liam Neeson. I can hear his voice. That can be hard for some authors to capture, but you have mastered it.

    That said, and since I am not familar with character histories, I still haven't formed an opinion of Liam. I get that he is a holo star, but that's about all I know. I expect more on him soon.

    This turned out to be a prudent choice, since he entered the living room to find Obi-Wan doing some kind of tortured stumbling.

    For a young man who was quickly becoming adept in the classic lightsaber forms, his apprentice could be remarkably fumble-footed in certain situations. Whatever madness had overtaken him was affecting his balance and common sense.


    This was brilliant. Hearing Qui-Gon describe Obi-Wan's attempt at dancing was very funny in a subtle, understated, Qui-Gon sort of way. The fact that he kept commenting on it was amusing as well.

    You have captured the Qui-Obi banter as well. Excellent job.

    I've known about Noela for a long time, but have never come to her stories before. I think my mind is opening to it. She seems an incredible well rounded woman. She is self-sufficient and yet feminine. Strong and vulnerable at the same time. I hope I'm mirroring your understanding of her.

    In closing, Darth Ishtar ;), I want to tell you that I have enjoyed reading this fic more than some of your other work. For me, there is no doubt that you are at home here. You connect with these characters more than any others. Having read other fics of yours, I sense there is more of you here. Take it as you will. Its just my two cents.
  13. Araxie Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 6, 2006
    star 3
    Noelie told me you were doing this a few days ago and I finally had a moment to read. There are so many things that made me giggle through all of that. From Obi-wan trying to practice dancing, and Qui-Gon giving an awful vase to the couple. [face_laugh]

    I love the bets about who she would have a last fling with, and the whole bit with her going to the "fortune teller". This is very fun, and I look forward to more!
  14. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Catching up on the reader replies before tonight's installment!

    Noelie--LOL, yes, I am. Actually it's more a product of the story bossing me around instead of the other way around. The narrative pacing worked better this way. LOL, yeah, I love the bomb threat and Attachment, Actually. I just had to do that for the sake of my own sanity. :) And, no, he's not. Well, the Wookiee is nice enough when sober... And I figured as long as Liam Neeson shows up as an anagram...Jorj Culas just worked. :)

    princess_of_naboo--LOL, that'll take a back seat to everything else. Yoda just is easily amused and Mace is easy entertainment. Thanks!

    brodiew--Thanks, brodiew! Qui-Gon's voice is very hard t to get right at times, but I think writing Love, Qui-Gon has helped me become more comfortable with it. LOL, glad you liked the tux scene. My brother went through the same thing for prom, basicaly. And yes, he l-words Noela at a level. The wedding is going to be...well, just crazy and it's all my brain's fault!

    Noelie--Of course. The Jedi are busybodies who want some scandal. LOL, I'm sure Obi-Wan could waltz eventually, but he's still a teenager and nervous at that. Qui-Gon's line about breaking other things was inspired by the Dumbledore line in The Order of the Phoenix to the effect of "By all means, go on destroying my personal possessions. I daresay I have far too many of them." And yes, the wedding present is a bit of a curse. The sisters are banking on Noela loving them too much to kill them.

    nickenobi-nz--LOL, I liked that bit, too. It went through several permutations as most of my paragraphs do. I'd pick obi-wan as well. Glad you can't wait for the wedding.

    brodiew--LOL, you have no idea how relieving that is to hear, even though I'm not sure I'll ever believe I've got it right. :) Liam was invented by me, but if you want to see him written exquisitely, read By Small Things, Noelie's story. It's awesome on a whole new level. LOL, I liked that bit about describing Obi-Wan's dancing. It seemed as if he had sympathy for his apprentice having been there at one time or another. Thanks for liking the banter. I really hope you read more of the Noelaverse because with Noelie's help, it's turned into something really quite remarkable and poignannt. She's an awesome character. I'm amused/amazed that you liked htis so much and I do feel like I'm at home here.

    Araxie--Oh, good. I do live to entertain, after all. Glad you liked the mentioned bits. The whole fortune eler thing is something I made up for Alderaan in 1999 and now it's a bit of a joke in some stories that i write. Thanks!
  15. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    By prior arrangement, Liam had managed to secure one of the smaller dining rooms at the 23rd Hour. One of the disadvantages to the room was the fact that it was more cramped than the other private rooms, but he had chosen it for a very specific reason. The larger rooms had long, rectangular tables that could accommodate up to thirty people.

    Given that there were the bride and groom, four bridesmaids, four ushers and an ?attachment of the bride? as everyone had taken to calling Qui-Gon, they hardly needed a table for thirty. At least that was the excuse that Liam had given to anyone who had asked among those in the party. The more practical reasoning was that no one would be able to isolate themselves at a round table.

    By the time he arrived at 1700, the Ovorp sisters were there, looking to be in varying states of cautious happiness. They at least looked less inclined to strangle each other than they had when Liam had last seen them. Then again, they had been through final fittings, hair consultations and even final meetings with the caterer. After an afternoon like that, Liam could certainly understand if they were feeling a bit testy.

    Nevertheless, Noela seemed to be at least happy to see him, which was a good sign. Qui-Gon was making up for the absence of his Padawan?after all, Obi-Wan could hardly be a ringbearer at his age?by trying to keep a conversation between his sisters and Noela?s. Brena was the most unresponsive of the group, but that was nothing surprising.

    ?It seems to be going well,? Noela murmured from his right-hand side.

    ?Even if Qui-Gon hasn?t spoken to you all night?? he teased, reaching over to take the hand that wasn?t holding her wineglass.

    ?That?s for a good cause,? she protested with a grin. ?Besides, he was smart enough to do so before I made it an order.?

    ?He?s a diplomat,? Liam observed. ?You expected any less??

    She took a long sip of her wine, then shrugged indifferently. ?Of course not.?

    ?What are his standing orders?? he asked.

    ?There?s a list of forbidden words,? Qui-Gon said, apparently having eavesdropped during a break in his conversation.

    That wasn?t exactly a shock. Noela tended to do that with everyone from her secretary to her own sisters. Still, he had never heard what exactly her oldest friend?s entailed.

    ?Such as what?? he challenged.

    Qui-Gon and Noela exchanged the sort of bemused look that he had learned to decipher fairly quickly and spoke just one word in unison: ?Attachment.?

    Mere immediately snorted her wine up her nose in amusement, drawing the attention away from their conversation. After helping clean up, of course, Qui-Gon turned back to Noela.

    ?So, what has you looking so disgruntled?? he inquired.

    Noela just rolled her eyes. ?You?ve heard of a brechtialtin, right??

    ?A soothsayer,? he recalled.

    ?The actual word means ?bridesight,?? she corrected, ?but you guessed close enough. It?s an old superstition and Alderaanian brides traditionally go to hear promises of childbearing, long life, neverending love and that sort of idealistic nonsense.?

    All three of them knew exactly what she meant by that, since she had expressed her opinion often enough over the last few months. Brena, however, was always the one to try and fight Liam?s battles for him and looked up sharply from her dinner plate.

    ?I didn?t think my brother would marry someone who thought love was nonsense or idealistic,? she challenged.

    Noela usually took that sort of criticism in stride as something impersonal, but she had been eager to please his sisters. Liam had guessed that it had something to do with how close she was to her own sisters and an unspoken understanding of a similar dynamic in his family.

    ?I did not say that,? she said calmly, though her cheeks had flushed pink. ?The nonsense is that anyone except the bridegroom can contribute those things to the marriage. As I said, the brechtialtin claims to promise those things, but I will be promising those things to Liam myself.?

    ?And I to her,? Liam interjected by wa
  16. Noelie Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2005
    star 4
    Well now I am sure of at least one important way that my feelings diverge from Noela's: I would not have spent years telling him to cut the hair.

    On the other hand...lol at spontaneous combustion. I feel rather badly for all those facing Noela's wrath. As I recall our girl has rather more charm than spending it all her life yelling at those she loves.. but then this is a wedding and as Qui-Gon states in my sig-fun is out of the question..

    The Haircut...and all the fun that will cause!
  17. Araxie Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 6, 2006
    star 3
    Ha, Ha, spontaneous combustion, with Flambé to boot. [face_laugh]
  18. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    "Padawan..."

    Obi-Wan glanced up from his plate and diplomatically tried not to burst out laughing. Qui-Gon's expression suggested that he wasn't fooled by his apprentice's efforts to keep a straight face. Carmyn buried her own grin behind a glass of water and looked pointedly away.

    "Yes, Master?" Obi-Wan asked.

    Qui-Gon looked rather disgruntledly at Carmyn, but even with half of his hair singed off, he was too polite to comment on it.

    "Noela has asked me to go to her apartment to make...preparations," he said solemnly. "Would you like me to drop you at the Temple first?"

    "Oh, I shouldn't think that necessary," the elder Lady Delairs replied before Obi-Wan could even open his mouth. "We would be only too happy to see him safely home and I would imagine that you have more pressing matters to attend to."

    Carmyn began coughing rather indelicately and Obi-Wan reached over to thump her solidly on the back a few times. Qui-Gon turned to Lady Delairs and bowed his singed head in deference.

    ?My thanks,? he said politely. ?I hope it doesn?t take you out of your way.?

    ?Not at all,? Carmyn said once she?d managed to breathe again. ?The Embassy is on a nearly direct line from the Temple.?

    ?Good,? Qui-Gon said in an attempt to sound pleasant. ?I will see you at the Temple, then.?

    ?I?ll be waiting,? Obi-Wan agreed. ?Do you need me to do anything in preparation for tomorrow??

    Qui-Gon grimaced. ?I shouldn?t think so,? he muttered. ?You don?t need a haircut.?

    It was as if the man was trying to get him to laugh. Obi-Wan let his mouth twitch, but neither smiled nor laughed.

    ?I?ll be in bed by the time you get home, then,? he responded politely. ?Safe travels, Master.?

    ?And to you,? Qui-Gon said as he turned away.

    Carmyn shook her head. ?He should have been either a diplomat or a champion sabacc player,? she mused. ?Anyone who could catch fire and still be civil would certainly be suited for either job.?

    ?I?ll keep that in mind just in case the Order ever throws him out,? Obi-Wan joked.

    ?They wouldn?t,? she asserted. ?He seems to be too entertaining to let go.?

    ?I wouldn?t let him know that,? Obi-Wan confided. ?He?s been trying to mellow in his old age.?


  19. Noelie Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2005
    star 4
    ?They wouldn?t,? she asserted. ?He seems to be too entertaining to let go.?

    ?I wouldn?t let him know that,? Obi-Wan confided. ?He?s been trying to mellow in his old age.?


    And without Noela and her wedding to have him be the flambe as my sister put it, he might well have succeeded.

    Come back from your trip home safely!

  20. Araxie Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 6, 2006
    star 3
    ?They wouldn?t,? she asserted. ?He seems to be too entertaining to let go.?

    Kendra ask me what was wrong when she heard me laugh at that line. I just told her nothing, I just read something very funny!
  21. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    "Sit."

    Qui-Gon knew that this was a stressful time for all involved in what the holoshills were calling the "event of the century." He couldn't blame any of them for being slightly out of sorts at bad moments. Certainly, he had been brusque with Obi-Wan on occasion in the last week.

    Noela, however, seemed to have moved past anger and had settled on irritated despondency.

    "Are you..."

    "Qui-Gon," she said impatiently, "I'm supposed to be having one last foolish, fun, irresponsible night with my sisters right now, not giving you the haircut you've resisted for ten years."

    Qui-Gon was not one to blush or look shamefaced, but he certainly did not try to smile at her. Instead, he grimaced apologetically and doffed his outer robe.

    "Where shall I take up station?" he asked.

    She deflated slightly, utterly relieved by the fact that he wasn't going to argue the point, and jabbed a finger eastward. "The balcony," she commanded.

    "Yes, milady," he said solemnly.

    It was a fairly cold night for the season, but at least there was no wind. He settled onto the chair facing north and simply waited for her to arrive.

    She did so less than a minute later, toting a towel, combs, a portable razor and a pair of scissors.

    "If you could just take off the damaged ends..." Qui-Gon began rather nervously.

    "No."

    He arched an eyebrow, but just waited for an answer.

    "If I do that," she reasoned, "you'll look terribly lopsided."

    "All right," he sighed. "Make it even, but just don't cut too much off."

    "Qui..."

    She had started out sounding vaguely angry, but it seemed to be a good sign that she caught herself before she said something undiplomatic. He was clearly trying her patience, however, and he quickly repented of that.

    "All right," he said quietly. "Do what you must."

    "Glad you've come around to my way of thinking," she said frankly, "because there's something you need to know."

    "Yes?" he asked, trying to keep his voice steady. "This doesn't have to do with your personal hair philosophy, does it?"

    She looked slightly sheepish, to be frank. "No," she admitted, "but it has to do with the fact that I only know one haircut."

    "That's fine," he said patiently. "I will trust you."

    She seemed to be torn between the options of looking relieved and looking terrified. "You'll also look exactly like Liam," she informed him.

    Qui-Gon immediately squeezed his eyes shut, trying to picture himself with the short, rather tousled look that Liam usually sported. The only thing he could imagine in particular...

    "The beard won't suit that at all!" he protested.

    "No," she said ruefully, "but that's why I supplied a razor..."

    Something other than the night air was making his blood run cold now, but this was her wedding and there was no reason to make this difficult for her.

    "Do what you must," he reiterated.
    *****
    Thirty minutes later, he was on his way home and feeling rather naked. For the first time in a decade, his neck was bare and he could feel the wind against the clean-shaven skin of his chin.

    Admittedly, the woman knew what she was doing and it was not that the haircut was unflattering. It would look modern and dashing, or at least so Noela had claimed.

    What Obi-Wan would have to say about the entire incident, he did not want to contemplate.

    The Temple loomed ahead and he reached into the pocket of his slacks to extract his wallet. Since it was well-known that several prominent members of the Order would be in attendance at the wedding, several holoshills had attempted to breach the perimeter. This had led to every visitor being required to present an identichip and be registered with a thumbprint. It was a bother, but a necessary...

    Oh, blast.

    A quick search of the speeder confirmed what his empty pocket had suggested.

    Somehow, he'd managed to leave his wallet and, therefore, all forms of identification, back at Noela's apartment.

    She will NOT be pleased...
    *****
    "Qui!" Mere squealed as she opened the door. "I thought
  22. Noelie Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2005
    star 4
    I know I am supposed to feel sorry for Qui-Gon but all I have is this urge to laugh.....

  23. princess_of_naboo Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Nov 9, 2000
    star 4
    Oh no, they're going to be twins now! The mayhem it will cause! :D
  24. brodiew Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 11, 2005
    star 5
    Excellent additions to the story, Ish. I continue to marvel at your ability to write romantic comedy. This story is so easy to access. your style seems to me so laid back. As in this scene:

    "Padawan..."

    Obi-Wan glanced up from his plate and diplomatically tried not to burst out laughing. Qui-Gon's expression suggested that he wasn't fooled by his apprentice's efforts to keep a straight face. Carmyn buried her own grin behind a glass of water and looked pointedly away.

    "Yes, Master?" Obi-Wan asked.

    Qui-Gon looked rather disgruntledly at Carmyn, but even with half of his hair singed off, he was too polite to comment on it.


    Your delivery of the humor here is terrific.

    And, as Noelie said, I identify with with Obi-wan and Tamryn. Trying to supress a laugh can be difficult when half of your Master's hair has been burned off. That scene was reallly fun. I also liked how Tamryn's family spoke up for Obi-Wan and offered him a ride home.

    Edit: What princess_of_naboo said. ;)
  25. Araxie Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 6, 2006
    star 3
    I agree with Noelie. Poor Qui-Gon, he is just getting himself into more awkward moments!
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