Attack of the Clones: the film that TPM should have been

Discussion in 'The Phantom Menace' started by TrueJedi, Aug 6, 2001.

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  1. Quaff-Down Gin Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 28, 1999
    star 4
    [Angelina Jolie opens the envelope]

    "And the winner for Special Effects goes to...

    Attack of the -pmmmtt!-

    Attack -ppmmmmmtt!-

    ha ha!

    Attack... pmmt!

    of... pmmtpmmmt!

    the...

    pppmmmmmmmtttt!bwahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAOOOOoooooh!MERCY!"

  2. MoonMan080 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Apr 13, 2001
    star 3
    HA!

    she should laugh!

    TALK ABOUT CRAP!

    TOMB RAIDER BLEW, SUCKED AND BIT, all at the same time!
  3. MoonMan080 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Apr 13, 2001
    star 3
    AND YES, THAT'S POSSIBLE!
  4. That_Wascally_Droid Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 29, 2001
    star 6
    Binary, the last two times were unwillingly?
    Oh thank God!
    I can respect you mental state now! LOL
    You gotta admit, someone who wastes money on a movie they hate has to be unhealthily addicted. :D
    You poor guy! If you hate AotC and are forced to see it more than once, ummmm take a pillow :) Or you know, concentrate on the over-buttered over-salted over-priced popcorn. Or request to the rest of the bunch to sit in the back of the theater, put on some head phones, and listen to some good music. Been in that situation before bud. Not fun!
  5. Quaff-Down Gin Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 28, 1999
    star 4
    I still think George should change it to "Clones Attack!" in honor of the cinematic genius of Tim Burton and his legendary A+++ masterpieces (Planet of the Apes, Sleepy Hollow, Batman Returns, Mars Attacks!), and then GL can put those cool aliens in the Senate and have them barking demands "or else!" And then he could put one of those wrecked saucers in Watto's junkyard and Natalie Portman could be like "Woah! Deja vu!", and then GL can maybe throw in a Tom Jones song or two! This would be quite a tribute. I think he owes it to us and especially to Burton, the greatest cinematic artiste EVER (save for GL, of course!).

    Come to think of it, Burton and Lucas should maybe collaborate on a new project, like "Attack of the Planet of the Sleepy Hollow-eyed Ape Clones". Yeah! Imagine the laughs! Can you picture Jar Jar farting in the face of one of the "Mars Attacks!" aliens!

    "BARKBARK! BARK babaBARKBARKBARK BLAK!!!"

    PPPFLFLFLFLGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!

    HA HA HA!!!

    hoooo Nellie!
  6. CrixMadine2 Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jul 9, 2000
    star 2
    You feeling alright Quaff?
  7. Bud Frescoe Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 19, 2000
    star 3
    Someone on AICN mentioned this, and I thought it was worth passing along.

    All of the previous film titles in some way referenced the earlier film/s (in addition to giving the audience an idea of what the new film is about).

    "A New Hope" reminds us of the Jedi purge of Episodes II and III (suggested through the backstory Kenobi gives to Luke). "The Empire Strikes Back" reminds us that The Empire got its arse whupped in Episode IV. "Return of the Jedi," like ANH reminds us of the backstory of the Purge and also reminds us that Luke, the last Jedi, got his arse royally whupped in TESB. "The Phantom Menace" didn't need to refer to an earlier film or the backstory because it was the first film of the saga.

    Following that pattern, Episode II should have in some way referenced TPM--specifically the shift in power away from the Jedi and toward the Sith. "Attack of the Clones" has no direct reference to the backstory, which destroys the pattern established by Lucas with the OT.
  8. Darth23 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 14, 1999
    star 4
    Interesting - though a somewhat flimsy pattern.

    Maybe TPM started a NEW pattern. Referencing the present movie and what's to come in the future. :D

    We saw the Phantom Menace in Ep 2 and we'll learn that the menace is real as the episodes move along. I'm mostly spoiler free, but I'm guessing that The Clone Wars don't end in Episode 2.
  9. That_Wascally_Droid Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 29, 2001
    star 6
    Because that was what Lucas was going for and certainly not something a fan happened to notice and make up :b
    Bashing AotC is fine, but finding some great hidden pattern in the other titles is going a bit far.
    Yes, I know you yourself weren't making that point. You were just passing it along :)
  10. Bud Frescoe Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 19, 2000
    star 3
    Great HIDDEN pattern? I'd say it's more an extremely OBVIOUS pattern. Every title in the OT refers both to the film itself and reminds us of the previous films. What is so hidden about this?

    Darth23, both the audience and the Jedi learned that the Menace was real in Episode I, so your pattern doesn't hold.
  11. Darth-Stryphe Former Mod and City Rep

    Member Since:
    Apr 24, 2001
    star 6
    You know, and seriously now (as I feel the need to say seriously, since I've had trouble being serious after discovering I was a fan to a movie called Attack of the Clones), the oscars snubbed GL in 2000, I wonder if they'll use the sorry title as an excuse to not even nominated it. the jokes about " and the award goes to -- " are funny and valid, but remember, if it gets nomiated, they still gotta talk about it. I bet the academy won't even acknowledge it as a movie.

    So, I've noticed that the general public's response to AOTC has been questionable at best. The best non-fan response I've heard is was something like "well, GL still has his inner child at work, it'll probably make lots of money", and the worst was something to the effect "that title is so bad, and it was such bad taste to use the senate comiittee talks about human cloning as a marketing method" I'm not accusing him GL myself of using the human cloning contraversy as an advertising method, but it is interesting that he announced the title the same day that human cloning was big in the news.
  12. KyleSith Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 26, 2000
    STAR WARS, Episode II: "Attack of the Clones"

    I like the sound of that! I think it's a fine title and I welcome it with open arms.

    I, truthfully, don't understand where all of the bashing is coming from. It fits with the other titles. It harkens back to a bi-gone era that Lucas, has said time and again, that he loves. Nobody has even seen the film yet!

    You know, I enjoy the stories that George Lucas tells me. I think it's a great privelege to view a Star Wars movie. I like George's title conventions and how he structures his movies. I always know that I'm going to be pleasantly surprised when I see a Lucas film. I just plain enjoy them. This is why I don't mind the new title. Because it fits with what George has done before and that means that I'm going to LOVE this new chapter!

    I'm sick of the whiny fan-boys and bashers who feel they're owed something. You're not.


  13. JediMight Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Dec 30, 2000
    star 2
    Agreed, KyleSith. I have very little problem with this title. I just feel bad that so many people are whining about it. It seems very hip to criticize Lucas nowadays. IMO, these people just want attention.

    As far as ATOC being the film that TPM should have been, it needs more character personality and better humor. Those things were lacking.
  14. AmeiaSkywalker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 28, 2001
    star 3
    I didn't like the name at first, but it grows on you, especially when you think of the other SW names.
    I like it now.
    I'm not sure the AOTC will be as good as TPM.
  15. Rabid_Balding_Ewok Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 8, 2000
    star 4
    >>>Agreed, KyleSith. I have very little problem with this title. I just feel bad that so many people are whining about it. It seems very hip to criticize Lucas nowadays. IMO, these people just want attention.<<<<

    LMAO. I guess people must have been whiny about Ed Wood aswell. Heaven forbid someone should think that fart jokes and killing droids with a blaster attached to your feet is lame. Or that someone finds the title AOTC to be rather embarassing. Thats right it's all because it's hip to criticize Georgie Boy. It's just mindless bashing without any thought or real concerns. Sure it's the old mans story and he could do whatever he likes with it. but does that make every aspect of his story perfect? If it does then I guess "Batman And Robin" aswell as "Godzilla" were great films. ;)
  16. TrueJedi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 22, 2000
    star 5
    KyleSith:

    I'm sick of the whiny fan-boys and bashers who feel they're owed something. You're not.

    Here's your wake-up call: People like me who you would call a basher, like the title so I suggest you wait and read some of the posts here before drawing your misguided conclusion.

    As Ep. II draws near, the lines drawn over who is a basher and a gusher will change dramatically with some gushers becoming bashers and some bashers becoming gushers. Don't let yourself become trapped in the labels of yesterday that will no longer be valid tomorrow.
  17. KyleSith Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 26, 2000
    Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Don't try to be poignant, TrueJedi. It doesn't suit you. I've read this entire thread along with hundreds of other posts here, thanks.

    Jeez, I don't remember anyone bitching when IJ & TLC came out and Sallah and Brody were turned into buffoons for comic relief. Yet everyone HATES Jar-Jar. Nobody complains about "Raiders of the Lost Ark" but HATES "Attack of the Clones."

    QUITYERBELLYACHINGANDSHUTUP.

  18. Nrf-Hrdr Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 3, 2000
    star 4
    I can't help wondering whether the people who are so obsessed with using these idiotic labels to attack others are coming from the same place as the people who made black people sit on seperate beaches. This forum's certainly a good way of identifying people who are prone to prejudice.
  19. CeeJay Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Aug 11, 2000
    star 4
    Considering that we all know how this story ends and vaguely how it all starts, let's put the whole thing into perspective..

    Episode 1: The Phantom Menace
    Episode 2: Attack of the Clones
    Episode 3: ??? Fall of the Jedi ???
    Episode 4: A New Hope
    Episode 5: The Empire Strikes Back
    Episode 6: Return of the Jedi

    They sound like chapters to one story, isn't that what these titles are meant to represent? Standing alone I doubt many of the above would make great titles for a film, I mean.. "THE PHANTOM MENACE" could have been the title of a film about a stalker, "A NEW HOPE" If you didn't know your Star Wars that could easily be the name of a new film about a terminal desease victim, "THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK" can you say 'WWII propaganda flick'?

    Isn't this always the way things are with the announcing of a new Star Wars title? I remember when GL renamed SW as Episode 4: A New Hope, people thought ???? what kind of a title is that and continued to call it Star Wars anyway. We all remember two years ago when TPM got announced and fans everywhere thought ???? what a rubbish title, now it simply rolls off the tongue, why.. because we have a series of events to put behind it! I have little doubt that after we all se the trailers and eventually the film that all gripes with AOTC will be vanquished.

    without giving away too much from Ep2, cloning is a big issue in the story and thus the rest of the saga. For those who don't know, this may well sound like a bad 50's B-movie but for those who do, the title really does hit the nail on the head for headlining the main event just as The Empire Strikes Back did! I'm no GL fan and if anything I thought TPM was a title that wouldn't do credit to the film, as it turns out the film did little credit to its title but with this one, with all i've read and seems to have it almost right. I'll give him the benefit of the doubt.. at least untill May 22 2002 anyway.

    Hi there Binary, Hawk, TPMRules23 and my old head bashing nemesis Gomer. Good to see you're all still at it and doing fine! That Rabid Balding Ewok still lose?
  20. TrueJedi Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 22, 2000
    star 5
    Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Don't try to be poignant, TrueJedi. It doesn't suit you. I've read this entire thread along with hundreds of other posts here, thanks.

    If you had really read through the thread then you wouldn't have made that lame remark. So you're either lying or demented. Which one is it? :p

  21. MoonMan080 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Apr 13, 2001
    star 3
    "Don't let yourself become trapped in the labels of yesterday that will no longer be valid tomorrow."

    Nice TJ. Like that one alot

    Worthy of a Fortune Cookie
  22. Quaff-Down Gin Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 28, 1999
    star 4
    As Quixotic Sith pointed out in another thread, here is a list of the other "Attack of the..." films:

    Attack of the 50 Foot Woman
    Attack of the Killer Tomatoes
    Attack of the Killer Shrews
    Attack of the Redneck Mutants
    Attack of the 5 Fairies Monastery, The
    Attack of the 50 Foot Chihuahua From Outer Space
    Attack of the 60 Foot Centerfold
    Attack of the Bat Monsters
    Attack of the Beast Creatures
    Attack of the Crab Monsters
    Attack of the Giant Leeches
    Attack of the Giant Mousaka, The
    Attack of the God of Joy
    Attack of the Hideopoid
    Attack of the Hungry Hungry Nipples
    Attack of the Jungle Women
    Attack of the Mayan Mummy
    Attack of the Puppet People


    Anyone see the pattern here? It's freakin' HILARIOUSLY horrible! It could also be seen as tragic, because the whole saga seems to be turning into a joke with Ewoks, Jar Jar, "Yippee!s", farts in the audience's face, Attack of the Clones, stepping in crap, etc.

    Don't get me wrong. If the movie is great I won't give a hoot about the title, but I can't deny that it is is yet another ominous sign.

    I admit that the other episodes have somewhat corny names, but at least they are _somewhat_ original and don't immediately bring back convulsious memeories of the worst films in the history of cinema.

    At best you may like it because it's so cheesy that it causes barrel laughs. That may work for some, but it won't for others.

    _Invasion_ of the Clones, although a HORRIBLE title, would be better than AotC, simply because it doesn't tie itself immediately and eternally with these other crap films.
  23. That_Wascally_Droid Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 29, 2001
    star 6
    How is the pattern hidden?
    Well ok it's not. Hidden was a bad choice of words. I'd say unintentional. i'm sure if that was what Lucas was going after somebody beforehand would have said something. I really think George just names em as he sees em.
    'Hmmm i want a cheesy sci fi serial feel for this one. Make it real campy, but fun. Attack of the Clones!'
    'Uhh George. . . I dunno. . .'
    'My movie Rick.'
    'But I-'
    'Go play with your action figures Rick.'
    'Yes sir. . .'
  24. MoonMan080 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Apr 13, 2001
    star 3
    Why is it that we have to automatically think of bad movies with similar names?

    I mean, there's no 50-ft woman or giant tomatoes right?

    Are people worried about that?
  25. Bud Frescoe Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 19, 2000
    star 3
    "How is the pattern hidden? Well ok it's not. Hidden was a bad choice of words. I'd say unintentional."

    I'm starting to think that the quality of ANH and TESB was unintentional.
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