BBBC - The Zoo Crew (Mornings)

Discussion in 'Big Brother House' started by Dark_Lord_Erik, Jul 31, 2002.

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  1. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    Good morning everybody out there in radio-land. Welcome to the first show ever on the Big Brother Broadcasting Corp.(BBBC).

    Erik here, and boy do we have tons of entertaining, embarrassing, and amazingly exciting spots on today's show.

    You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll most likely get sick at some point.

    We'll be right back after this song from Billy Joel...
  2. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    Billy Joel - Piano Man


    It's nine o'clock on a Saturday
    The regular crowd shuffles in
    There's an old man sitting next to me
    Makin' love to his tonic and gin

    He says, "Son, can you play me a melody?
    I'm not really sure how it goes
    But it's sad and it's sweet and I knew it complete
    When I wore a younger man's clothes"

    La la la, de de da
    La la, de de da da da

    Chorus:

    Sing us a song, you're the piano man
    Sing us a song tonight
    Well, we're all in the mood for a melody
    And you've got us feelin' alright

    Now John at the bar is a friend of mine
    He gets me my drinks for free
    And he's quick with a joke or to light up your smoke
    But there's someplace that he'd rather be
    He says, "Bill, I believe this is killing me."
    As the smile ran away from his face
    "Well I'm sure that I could be a movie star
    If I could get out of this place"

    Oh, la la la, de de da
    La la, de de da da da

    Now Paul is a real estate novelist
    Who never had time for a wife
    And he's talkin' with Davy who's still in the navy
    And probably will be for life

    And the waitress is practicing politics
    As the businessmen slowly get stoned
    Yes, they're sharing a drink they call loneliness
    But it's better than drinkin' alone

    Chorus

    It's a pretty good crowd for a Saturday
    And the manager gives me a smile
    'Cause he knows that it's me they've been comin' to see
    To forget about life for a while
    And the piano, it sounds like a carnival
    And the microphone smells like a beer
    And they sit at the bar and put bread in my jar
    And say, "Man, what are you doin' here?"

    Oh, la la la, de de da
    La la, de de da da da

    Chorus

  3. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    And we're back!

    To really kick things off we're going to do 1 hour trivia.

    If you know the answer post it in [link=http://boards.theforce.net/message.asp?topic=8136133]this thread.[/link]

    First Question:

    On the show Family Ties, what was Mallory's fiance's name?

    The first person to answer wins nothing, but they get to up their post count by one!


  4. wild_karrde Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 1999
    star 7
    Whoa! Got started without me, did ya?

    Don't mind me being late. I was at a record launch last night, hanging with the rich and beautiful.
  5. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    How was that? Probably better than getting drunk and passing out. Third time this week for me.

    So what's on the agenda for our little show that could today?
  6. wild_karrde Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 1999
    star 7
    Well, I got some wrestling news I'll share a little later on, and some good tunes.

    And maybe even a prank call or two, if everyone is nice to me.
  7. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    Well the phones are lighting up.

    Hello, who am I speaking to?

    Caller: Porkins in a Speedo.

    Did you have an answer for the first trivia question?

    Caller: Yep, it's Nick Moore.

    //plays siren noise

    You win a shiney post for your postcount. Congrats!

    //CLears the phone lines.

    Question # 2:

    Which member of the A-Team was the pilot?

  8. wild_karrde Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 1999
    star 7
  9. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    //Picks up the phone

    Hello, who am I speaking to.

    Caller: Porkins in a Speedo

    Didn't you just call?

    Caller: Damn right.

    DO you have the answer for this question as well?

    Caller: Murdoch

    That's right, Howling Mad Murdoch. I guess that you're our #1 fan?

    Caller: Not a chance. You suck.

    Thanks.

    //clears phone lines

    Question #3:

    What was the name of Punky Brewster's dog?

    It's 80's TV trivia day!!!
  10. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    Well, it looks like people know their 80's TV trivia...

    //Picks up the phone

    HEllo, is this Porkins In A Speedo again?

    Caller: Um, no? Did I call the BBBC?

    Yep, who am I speaking to?

    Caller: jedi-mind-trick.

    Well, good to see someone else answering the questions. Do you have the answer?

    Caller: Is it Brandon?

    Yes it is. Congrats on your newest post. You are a winner!

    //clears the phone lines

    Question #4

    What was the name of ALF's girlfriend from his home planet of Melmac?
  11. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    So, Derek, how is that wrestling news coming along?

    All that I know is that Raw was hectic this week and Smackdown looks to be on par with it.
  12. wild_karrde Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 1999
    star 7
    Where do you come up with these?
  13. wild_karrde Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 1999
    star 7
    Yep, Smackdown is going to be pretty wild this week as there are a pair of Raw wrestlers who make their way to Smackdown, and they are ..... Eddy Guerrero and Chris Benoit, the new IC Champ!

    The matches which will be taking place include Rey Mysterio vs. Tajiri, in what should be a great Cruiserweight match!
  14. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    I'm full of useless information and a link to google.com.

    //picks up the phone

    Hello, who am I speaking to.

    Caller: Porkins in a Speedo

    Are you sure that you aren't our #1 fan?

    Caller: LIke I said the first time, no you suck.

    Then why do you listen?

    Caller: I like the trivia, and I like calling you up and telling you that you suck.

    Fair enough.

    So, what's the answer?

    Caller: Rhonda was ALF's girl from Melmac Did you know that ALF would always try and eat cats? Also, ALF was just a really small guy in a suit. I'm sure that it would get hot in that suit.

    I'm sure that it would.

    Caller: Sometimes I would stay up all night dreaming about being ALF. He's my hero. I have all of his shows on tape. I even have the telephone comercials he's been doing. He's dreamy.

    //backs away from the phone and hangs up.

    Well, thanks for playing 1 hour trivia today. THere will be more tomorrow.

    Here's some music to fill the time...
  15. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    Third Eye Blind - Semi Charmed Life:

    I'm packed and I'm holding,
    I'm smiling, she's living, she's golden and
    she lives for me, She says she lives for me,
    Ovation, She's got her own motivation,
    she comes round and she goes down on me,
    And I make her smile, It's like a drug for you,
    Do ever what you want to do,
    Coming over you,
    Keep on smiling,
    what we go through.
    One stop to the rhythm that divides you,
    And I speak to you like the chorus to the verse,
    Chop another line like a coda with a curse,
    And I come on like a freak show takes the stage.
    We give them the games we play, she said,
    I want something else, to get me through this,
    Semi-charmed kind of life,
    I want something else,
    I'm not listening when you say, Good-bye.

    The sky it was gold, it was rose,
    I was taking sips of it through my nose,
    And I wish I could get back there,
    Some place back there,
    Smiling in the pictures you would take,
    Doing crystal myth,
    Will lift you up until you break,
    It won't stop,
    I won't come down, I keep stock,
    With a tick tock rhythm and a bump for the drop,
    And then I bumped up. I took the hit I was given,
    Then I bumped again,
    And then I bumped again.
    How do I get back there to,
    The place where I fell asleep inside you?
    How do I get myself back to,
    The place where you said,
    I want something else to get me through this,
    semi-charmed kind of life,
    I want something else,
    I'm not listening when you say, good-bye,

    I believe in the sand beneath my toes,
    The beach gives a feeling,
    An earthy feeling,
    I believe in the faith that grows,
    And the four right chords can make me cry,
    When I'm with you I feel like I could die.
    And that would be all right,
    All right, When the plane came in,
    She said she was crashing,
    The velvet it rips,
    In the city we tripped,
    On the urge to feel alive,
    But now I'm struggling to survive,
    The days you were wearing,
    That velvet dress,
    You're the priestess,
    must confess,
    Those little red panties,
    They pass the test,
    Slide up around the belly,
    Face down on the mattress,
    One,
    Now you hold me,
    And we're broken.
    Still it's all that I want to do.
    Feel myself with a head made of the ground,
    I'm scared but I'm not coming down.
    And I won't run for my life,
    She's got her jaws just locked now in smile
    but nothing is all right,
    All right, I want something else,
    To get me through this,
    Semi-charmed kind of life,
    I want something else,
    I'm not listening when you say,
    good-bye.
  16. wild_karrde Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 1999
    star 7
    And here's some more wrestling news and notes:

    - During the Canadian broadcast of Raw on TSN during the Island Boys 'beating' of Mae Young and Moolah, TSN cut to a promo of Jonathan Coachman advertising WWE Niagara Falls. This is nothing abnormal seeing as TSN usually always edits what they call 'sick' RAW moments.

    Personal comment: God damn the CRTC. Can I say "God damn" on the air? Of well.

    - Despite previous reports, David Flair has not been released by WWE.

    Personal comment: Good! This kid has potential. And I'd rather see him in the ring than his really old "old man".

  17. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    Yeah, it's just sad to watch the Elder Flair get his ass handed to him night in and night out.

    That was some big news on the RAW wrestlers defecting. Which side do you feel made out the best this week with their roster moves?
  18. wild_karrde Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 1999
    star 7
    It's hard to tell. Eddy and Chris are probably 2 of the best wrestlers in the business today, but the "Un-Americans" [cough]dumb name![/cough] are the Tag champs, and Raw really needed them there.
  19. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    Agreed. Maybe they should be called the "American'ts".

    Actually, no, nevermind.

    I'm hankerin' for a crankerin' who should we dial up today?
  20. wild_karrde Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 1999
    star 7
    And speaking of wrestling, here's Turn Me On Mr. Deadman by The Union Underground, who sing the new theme for Raw:


    Penetrate, Penetrate
    All the simple minds
    They adore, what a bore how they stand in line
    Dilate, Dilate
    What's my drug of choice?
    It's okay when they pay they say I got the voice
    Look at this the motherf***er is a millionaire
    Realize it's a mask that you wear
    Violate, Violate
    Such a simple plan

    Turn me on turn me on Mr. Deadman

    Yeah I want it
    I need it
    To make a million
    Yeah I love it
    A f***in' rockstar

    Penetrate, Penetrate
    All the simple minds
    They adore, what a bore how they stand in line
    Dilate, Dilate
    What's my drug of choice?
    It's okay when they pay they say I got the voice
    Look at this the little *****t is a millionaire
    Realize it's a mask that you wear
    Violate, Violate
    Such a simple plan
    Turn me on turn me on Mr. Deadman
  21. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    Time for that crank call.

    //Flips through phone book till he finds what he's looking for.

    Ahh, here it is.

    //pick's up phone and dials a lot of numbers

    I hope that BBBC doesn't mind the phone bill.


    Me: Hello? Is this epic?

    epic: Yes,it is mate. What can I do for you?

    Me: I was just calling to see if your kangaroo was running?

    epic: I don't have a kangaroo anymore, mate.

    Me: (shocked that he had one) Um, what has happened to it?

    epic: It kicked me a couple times.

    Me: So, what happened to it after that?

    epic: Crikey, I killed it.

    Me: What the hell?

    epic: That's right, mate. I busted 3 caps in its bottom.

    ME: Alright, forget that I called.

    epic: THen I ate it. It was right tasty.

    Me: Alright, I'll leave you be with your dead kangaroo.

    epic: THanks for calling, mate. Right nice speaking with a fine bloke like you.

    //hangs up

    That wasn't what I was going for. Must be a first show jinx, or something?
  22. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    Now it's time for some commercials. We have to pay the bills.



    Try new Code Purple Orange Soda. It's the same Orange Soda taste, but it's purple. Doesn't tha make you want to go and get some right now?


    Kid: Mom, I don't like the regualr Orange Soda, can I get some of the new Code Purple Orange Soda?

    Mom: Sure son. Anything for you.

    Kid: This sucks just as bad as the regular Orange Soda. Maybe Code Yellow Orange Soda Will be better.


    Code Yellow Orange Soda, coming Spring 2003.

    It'll be the same crappy taste, but it'll be yellow. We're extreme!

  23. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5


    Do you want a career in radio broadcasting just like the people that you're listening to right now?

    Well, we're positive that you could do better than them. So, come on down to the Bureau for Better DJs. We'll teach you how to be just as crude and sarcastic as your favorite morning shift DJs.

    We'll even help you get their jobs.

    For a one time fee of $199.95, the Bureau for Better DJs will help you to force your local morning DJs out of the booth and place you right in their spot.

    So, call the Bureau for Better DJs at 1-600-555-3131.

    We'll be waiting.
  24. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    And we're back.

    I think that we'll be losing that last commercial. Where's that trash can.

    //hits garbage compactor sound

    And now, back to the music...

  25. Dark_Lord_Erik Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jan 19, 2001
    star 5
    Nirvana - Heart-Shaped Box

    She eyes me like a Pisces when i am weak
    I've been locked inside your Heart-Shaped box for a week
    I was drawn into your magnet tar pit trap
    I wish i could eat your cancer when you turn black

    Hey!
    Wait
    I've got a new complaint
    Forever in debt to your priceless advice
    Hate
    Haight
    I've got a new complaint
    Forever in debt to your priceless advice
    Hey!
    Wait
    I've got a new complaint
    Forever in debt to your priceless advice
    ...your advice

    Meat-eating orchids forgivee no one just yet
    Cut myself on angel's hair and bab's breath
    Broken hymen of you highness i'm left black
    Throw down your umbilical noose so i can climb right back

    Hey!
    Wait
    I've got a new complaint
    Forever in debt to your priceless advice
    Hate
    Haight
    I've got a new complaint
    Forever in debt to your priceless advice
    Hey!
    Wait
    I've got a new complaint
    Forever in debt to your priceless advice
    ... your advice

    She eyes me like a Pisces when i am weak
    I've been locked inside your Heart-Shaped box for a week
    I was drawn into your magnet tar pit trap
    I wish i could eat your cancer when you turn black

    Hey!
    Wait
    I've got a new complaint
    Forever in debt to your priceless advice
    Hate
    Haight
    I've got a new complaint
    Forever in debt to your priceless advice
    Hey!
    Wait
    I've got a new complaint
    Forerver in debt to your priceless advice
    ...your advice
    ....your advice
    ...your advice


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