Before Beginning of A Legend - Qui-Gon, Crion, Xanatos

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Ranil-Starwing, Jan 11, 2009.

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  1. Ranil-Starwing Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Sep 10, 2007
    Beginning of a Legend

    Qui-Gon Jinn, a Jedi Knight, discovers a Force-senstitive boy on Telos IV. The boy's father, however, is the governor of the planet, and reluctant to let his son be taken away to a life that will dictate his every move within a strict Code of duty and honor. This boy's name? Xanatos.

    (This is just a random bit of dialogue and stuff that came to me. It's not supposed to be all that great, as I'm sure half the details are wrong regarding Qui-Gon's age (I know now that he was supposed to be an apprentice when he found Xanatos, but for some reason that didn't make sense to me) and Crion and all that. I couldn't find much to work with for Crion. Comments and contructive criticism are appreciated.)

    Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars, Jedi Apprentice, etc...


    Crion, governor of Telos IV, was a man of average height, but gave the impression of being much taller. He held himself straight and upright, much like a military commander, and the curt tone with which he gave orders was also reminiscent of such a position. He had thick, dark hair, streaked with iron-grey, and his icy blue eyes, typical of a Telosian, were deep-set in a hard, strong face. At the moment, those eyes were gazing outward, staring fixedly at the man standing a few feet away.

    Usually, this tactic worked quite well, causing the other party to lower their gaze, fidget, shift from side to side, or otherwise avoid looking back at the penetrating stare. This kind of intimidation was one Crion used frequently and most often to his benefit. The normal routine, however, was taking an unexpected turn at the present, for the blue-grey eyes of the other man were staring calmly, almost serenely, right back at the governor. Who this man was, Crion was still unsure of. He was tall, much taller than Crion, with fairly long tan hair, partially tied back, and a rather craggy countenance considering his young age. Flowing dark brown robes partly concealed garb of grayish-white tunic and pants, seemingly loose and comfortable. He had introduced himself as Qui-Gon Jinn, and quite apart from having a name that sounded like a drink from an Outer Rim cantina, he had also mentioned he was a Jedi Knight.

    ?You don?t believe me,? remarked Qui-Gon Jinn. There was a faintly amused note in the way he said it. Crion was still coming to grips with the idea that this man, a complete stranger, was reading him like a common datapad. Why, he had probably had very little experience in the galaxy, being only in his mid-twenties, thirty at the oldest.

    ?And I certainly will not until I know more,? Crion replied in a flat voice. ?Admittedly, you do look the part, but?.? He shrugged.

    Qui-Gon Jinn sighed and moved forward. ?Normally I wouldn?t bother with this,? he explained as he reached for something beneath the folds of his robe.?But I want to make our discussion short.? He stretched out his free hand, fingers spread apart. A small power cell in the wall behind Crion broke free of its constraints and soared through the air, over the governor?s head and into Qui-Gon Jinn?s hand.

    ?The power of the Force,? he commented pleasantly. ?Convinced??

    ?Fairly,? was Crion?s dry and unemotional answer.

    ?Excellent. Then I trust I won?t have to resort to a demonstration of this.? Smiling, Qui-Gon Jinn indicated the object in his other hand ? a gleaming metal cylinder with many ridges and buttons ? which Crion immediately identified as a Jedi?s weapon of choice, a lightsaber.

    ?Now then,? Qui-Gon Jinn continued, hooking the hilt back on his belt and folding his arms across his chest. ?Your Excellency, I came to talk with you about your son.?

    Crion narrowed his icy eyes suspiciously. ?Xanatos? What about him??

    ?I sensed great potential from him,? the other said mildly. ?Jedi potential. The Force is very strong within him, Crion. If brought to the Temple on Coruscant, he could be trained as a Jedi Knight.?

    ?And what if I do not wish for him to be a Jedi??

    ?Then that is your choice,? Qui-Gon Jinn conceded, his eyes never leaving the go
  2. ratna Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2007
    star 4
    Nice prose. You're right about the chronology being different in canon. Not a huge issue since it's archetypes we're playing with here. Are you planning to continue ...?[face_whistling]
  3. Ranil-Starwing Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Sep 10, 2007
    Thank you for your comments!

    Hm. This was originally just a short little blip, if you will, that popped into my head and forced me to write it down. I hadn't planned on having anything more, but perhaps if people really want me to I can continue it to be a few chapters longer... we'll see.
  4. Raphire Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 19, 2008
    star 4
    Nice. Good plot bunny. I'm all for you writing more.
  5. mujapple-juicey Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 21, 2008
    star 4
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