Beyond Blood Trail (Post-LotF: Jaina, Tahiri, Ben, Jag, Han, Leia, Luke) Completed 11/4/09!

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by YodaKenobi, Jun 24, 2008.

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  1. Rivka Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Mar 31, 2008
    Oh dear. I knew Daala'd lost her grip on reality when she called Jag a misogynist. Clearly she's never met Jaina. But that'll change soon, won't it? And there'll be explosions? Okay, good.
    (Please add me to your PM list!)
  2. dancinut1080 Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 2, 2008
    The plot thickens!
    The opening description of Courscant is awesome I feel like I'm standing next to Daala and you write Daala very well. Absolutely Incredible! Keep up the great work, I can't wait for more!
  3. Sticks Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 27, 2001
    star 4
    Holy cow! Fantastic post. You know, there are two things profic authors can never get right: exposition in conversation, and writing from the perspective of the villain (be it Empire, Sith, or Yuuzhan Vong). I have never encountered a profic author who could handle both of those--at the same time, no less--as well as you just did. That post gripped me from start to finish. If I wasn't before, I am officially hooked now and I can't wait to see where this goes. :D
  4. Jaina_and_Jag Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 19, 2003
    star 5
    So Daala's like a puppet or at the very least, losting her mind? Interesting.. [face_thinking] Really loved that chapter. :D
  5. jagsredlady Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 7, 2002
    star 4
    Wow, Daala is a real piece of work. :eek: So, she has dissolved the Jedi council, and is interning Force sensitives. I can?t wait to see how Luke reacts to all this. She is obviously a dangerous person to be in such a powerful leadership position, you did a great job showing that.[face_worried]

    I was shocked when she had that memory ?rewind? at the end. Nice touch. =D=

    I didn?t know the brain damage Daala suffered resulting in memory loss is canon-based. I bow to your superior EU knowledge.=D= It will be interesting to see how her character get handled by the pros, lots of intriguing possibilities. Maybe making her the CoS was a genius move on TD?s part after all. [face_thinking] 8-}

    Fantastic chapter, Yobi. I loved your descriptions of Coruscant, very vivid. You made one of my current most hated EU characters come alive, and she?s finally not just annoying but is now interesting to me as well. [face_hypnotized]

    Can?t wait for more! Is it the day after Katunda yet? :p

  6. YodaKenobi VIP

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    May 27, 2003
    star 6
    GrandMasterKatarn: FIRST!!!!!!!!!!

    Great job =D=

    OMG! Daala can't remember what day it is?

    She seems to be having some problems here [face_whistling]

    Was part of her memory brain damaged so that the Sith could easily control her?

    Well, no. Daala suffered some brain damage 40 some years ago right before the Death Star was destroyed. The Sith didn't have anything to do with it, but if you're asking whether they're using that to their advantage, it's unclear at this point... Daala's not exactly doing something she wouldn't be for ordinarily.

    As usual, Yobi, you've left off with a great cliffhanger. Can't wait for more!

    Thanks so much, I'm glad you liked it. We'll be getting answers slowly but surely.

    Thanks for reading and replying :D More will be up on Tuesday.







    Jag4Me: *shudder*She is kriffin' nuts!

    She has been for decades :p

    This is getting good but I have to know....will we see Wobbler again?

    Hmm... definitely. ;)

    Thanks so much for reading and your reply :D






    Telanna: Edit: Third...

    Nicely done =D=

    Krayt, huh? I love the way your mind works, Yobi.

    Aww [face_blush] Thank you.

    The best place to hide is often in place sight. And the best lie is often based in truth, is it not?

    That's very true. A name like Krayt for a corporation really wouldn't arouse any suspicion at this point. It'll be almost a hundred years before he reveals himself.

    You've done anohter fantastic job of creating a clear picture not only of Daala's coniving plan and the world Jaina is returning to, but also Daala's fragile state of mind. Well done.

    Thanks, it was really tough to write her. The idea of her being CoS is so stupid it makes it difficult to write.

    Katunda. Also creative. It took me a minute to follow your meaning, but once I got it was a great touch.

    It's actually canon. Katunda is the second day of the week in SW. I was afraid that would be confusing cause it's so obscure. I certainly had to look it up. I tried to use the word several times in a row to drive home that it was a day of the week because if you take any one of those statements by themselves you're left going, "What's a Katunda?" :p

    Nice update.

    Thanks so much and thanks for reading and replying :)






    angry_bendu: Daala gosh darnit! You stop having thoughts about psychotic galactic domination this instant!

    She's been doing it for so long, it's hard to just stop 8-}

    And Krayt's popping up now?! That makes me really worry for Jaina.

    Well, he's around. I'm going to try and stay in the bounds of canon with this though, so he won't be revealing himself to the galaxy or anything

    And I think you're smart to be worried [face_whistling]

    Excellent post!

    Thank you and thanks for reading! :)






    jedi_princess18: Daala's creepy.

    No doubt about it [face_worried]

    But it appears Rive is playing her- I wonder how she would feel about that?

    Good question. I'm sure she wouldn't be too happy to know she was actually dealing with another Force-user since she hates them all.

    Thanks for reading and replying!




    TKeira_Lea: Wow! Daala blew me away.

    It was a tough one to write so that's good to hear.

    Well done

    Thanks! And thanks for reading :)







    canadianjedimama: From a purely medical standpoint, would her brain injury make her more susceptible to mind suggestion?

    I think it would. One of the tricks of the Mind-trick is making the person forget about it, so if Daala has trouble remembering things already and is king of all over the place, it would make a Force-users job easier.

    Interning the Jedi, eh?

    Well, that's what Daala thinks she's doing... [face_whistling]

    Well, I guess there's one in every galaxy. Two, really
  7. zonzo Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 3, 2007
    star 3
    19th... I have been shamed.

    When I first heard KraytCorp, I knew it'd be our friendly Tusken Sith.
  8. TahiriSoloFan Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2003
    star 4
    I'll join the crowd....Daala is nuts. :oops:

  9. THE_PIED_PIPER Chapter Rep Knoxville, TN

    Chapter Rep
    Member Since:
    Jun 8, 2006
    star 4
    [face_blush] YodaKenobi rocks my socks! [face_blush]

    It will never happen again Wes trust me. :p



    Very well done here. So much to be said but they don't say it. I don't know if it's Jag being prideful or Jaina being aloof and running...as always. This is a very believable reation from him if she just up and left after the end of Invincible.

    :eek: Oh, these two. They give me gray hair.

    Because she's Jaina. :(

    Sneaky Jag...I love sneaky Jag. [face_love]

    And Jaina being so closed off to everyone...I'm anxious to see how that works out. [face_peace]


    I saw your comments on Cem and it would make since if Cem Fel is female. :) I had heard this theory before but I never seen the evidence laid out until you did so. Overall I like it, because that would close any doubt on who is Fel I, being as though Legacy 0 makes its clear that Fel I is male, and the ages don't add up for it to be Soontir. [face_whistling]
  10. SilSolo Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2004
    star 5
    I see that Daala's being her evil self again
  11. SpiritofEowyn Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2005
    star 4
    I like the story so far, very well thought out.

    And just to show that I haven't been online or read a book all year long I'll say what I was thinking in chapter 1.

    "Jaina killed Jacen?!":eek:
  12. damienraw Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Jul 12, 2008
    Cool post especially the ending, though I didnt expect his involvment to be revealed so soon obviously the company names gave a big hit and it all feels like a natural extension of the stories in legacy

    I dont think daala really believes the jedi will quietly be confined to a planet, she wants them to fight her so she can move against them

    and I still dont like daala at all but at least she has an excuse for been a bit mental with the shrapnel that hasn't effected her at all ;-) , I wonder if her memory loss is what it sppears or perhaps the sith are mind rubbing her, though she has reason enough to dislike the jedi without that

    looking forward to the next post
  13. YodaKenobi VIP

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    Member Since:
    May 27, 2003
    star 6
    zonzo: 19th... I have been shamed.

    No shame in that [face_peace]

    When I first heard KraytCorp, I knew it'd be our friendly Tusken Sith.

    Good guess :D Have to wait and see how much we'll actually be seeing that Tusken Sith.

    Thanks for reading and your reply :D

    Love the new icon, btw! :cool:





    TSF: I'll join the crowd....Daala is nuts.

    I think she's just misunderstood [face_not_talking]

    ... Okay, she's crazy :p

    Thanks for reading and replying :D






    PIPER: YodaKenobi rocks my socks!

    Aww [face_blush]

    It will never happen again Wes trust me.

    You never know ;)

    Very well done here. So much to be said but they don't say it. I don't know if it's Jag being prideful or Jaina being aloof and running...as always.

    Probably both, though Jag seems to be making an effort.

    This is a very believable reation from him if she just up and left after the end of Invincible.

    Thanks. I'm kind of picturing her leaving a few weeks afterwards, trying to settle back into her life and realizing that's impossible.

    Oh, these two. They give me gray hair.

    I think I'm the only one who enjoys a scene like this :p

    Because she's Jaina.

    Yeah, she's got a lot of her mom in her. The kind of woman who takes charge of her own rescue :cool:

    Sneaky Jag...I love sneaky Jag.

    Hehe. He'll be up to a lot of stuff in this one...

    And Jaina being so closed off to everyone...I'm anxious to see how that works out.

    Hopefully it will have a good resolution.

    I saw your comments on Cem and it would make since if Cem Fel is female. I had heard this theory before but I never seen the evidence laid out until you did so. Overall I like it, because that would close any doubt on who is Fel I, being as though Legacy 0 makes its clear that Fel I is male, and the ages don't add up for it to be Soontir.

    The white streaked hair pretty much guarantee's that the Fel dynasty is at least Jag's off spring, IMO. I could be wrong, but it might be possible that Jag and Jaina's son is actually the first Emperor? I'll have to do the math.

    As for Cem being a girl, I'm glad you liked that. Originally everyone assumed Cem was a girl back in 2003 when FH came out (IIRC), but the Formbi thing in TJK changed everyone's mind, I guess :confused:

    One other thing I find interesting about it: One can assume that "Cem" is actually a Chiss name, as Formbi recognizes it as male but Mara and Luke assumed it was a female name. I find it interesting that Soontir and Syal would name one of their kids a Chiss name, but then, "Chak" sounds very Chiss too [face_thinking]

    Thanks so much for reading and replying :D







    Sil: I see that Daala's being her evil self again

    It's the only way she knows how to be :(

    Thanks for reading and your reply :)






    SpiritofEowyn: I like the story so far, very well thought out.

    Thank you, I'm glad you're enjoying it :)

    And just to show that I haven't been online or read a book all year long I'll say what I was thinking in chapter 1.
    "Jaina killed Jacen?!"


    At the end of LotF, yeah. They had a pretty brutal duel that resulted in Jaina killing Jacen.

    Thanks so much for reading :D





    damienraw: Cool post especially the ending, though I didnt expect his involvment to be revealed so soon obviously the company names gave a big hit and it all feels like a natural extension of the stories in legacy

    I thought about moving the comm call from Rive to later in the story, but there are a lot of other surprises on the way, so it seemed like the best place for it.

    I dont think daala really believes the jedi will quietly be confined to a planet, she wants them to fight her so she can move against them

    Probably. She'll move the non-jedi Force-sensitives off world where they can't spread out again and kill the existing Jedi. I think that's p
  14. corran2 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 16, 2006
    star 4
    Wow! What a twist! So Krayt s going to be seen in this story, and Daala is having memory issues? This is really getting me intrigued! Can't wait for tommorow!
  15. GrandMasterKatarn Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 8, 2008
    star 4
    What I was asking is if the Sith could me discretely pushing the part of Daala's brain that wants to exterminate the Jedi. Cuz I can see them prodding and pushing that part of her brain and watch her act.
  16. YodaKenobi VIP

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    Member Since:
    May 27, 2003
    star 6
    corran: Wow! What a twist!

    Glad you liked it :D

    So Krayt s going to be seen in this story,

    Maybe... Going to try and keep this in canon so I can't contradict things established in the Legacy comics.

    and Daala is having memory issues?

    Yeah, she suffered a brain injury in the Death Star novel that I think was the authors' way of retconning why she was so crazy and stupid throughout the EU.

    This is really getting me intrigued! Can't wait for tommorow!

    Thanks so much, I'm glad you're finding it so interesting :D And thanks for reading and replying!






    GrandMasterKatarn: What I was asking is if the Sith could me discretely pushing the part of Daala's brain that wants to exterminate the Jedi. Cuz I can see them prodding and pushing that part of her brain and watch her act.

    Oh, sorry, I misunderstood :oops: I think that could definitely be going on, especially since Daala is more than a little screwed up in the head already. We'll find out more about what's going on there eventually.

    Thanks again!





    Okay, new post will be up in a few minutes. I hope you guys will like it :)
  17. YodaKenobi VIP

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    Member Since:
    May 27, 2003
    star 6
    Chapter 4: Reversal

    The Cygnus Spaceworks shuttle knifed through the corona of rocks tumbling around the gas giant, the twin bands of blue efflux cooking from its ion drives vanishing in the reflected light of Oovo's churning stripes and whorls of orange and yellow. It glided and banked inside the halo of pocked asteroids, massive planetsimals, and glittering dust with a grace that far exceeded the abilities of the ailing craft.

    But even the record holder for the longest run on Lando's Folly couldn't avoid the rock particles and beads of frozen vapor that sometimes made it through the shuttle's flickering shields, further marring the spacecraft and making its brittle frame groan in protest. Frost had iced over the caked mud and humidity-warped hull plating, making it easier for the blood-red patches of rust eating through the durasteel armor to flake away.

    A colossal planetoid, designated as the fourth such in the asteroid belt orbiting the sphere of swirling gases, came into view only a few minutes into the course, its hollowed center a glowing blue well that rippled and shimmered against the endless clusters of white stars spattered across the void beyond. The shuttle angled for the electroluminescent depths and a small section of the asteroid's energy shields melted away, allowing it to sail down through a pit of a landing pad and set down gently before the vessel began venting unhealthy streams of white exhaust that rolled across the berthing, and the asteroid's shields were reactivated.

    Once the bay was repressurized, the pilot was escorted into one of the many veins of metal poking up through the asteroid's crust and led into the facility. She was searched and scanned by a myriad of security equipment and relieved of any tools or objects that could conceivably be used as weapons.

    The process took more than an hour, but when it was completed, Jaina found herself being escorted through Desolation Alley by a garrulous Iktotchi guard and his brooding Bothan partner, the former of which felt the need to give her a tour of Oovo IV as they traveled across the asteroid via transparisteel-lined corridors that gave a breathtaking view of the starfield and rolling mist of rocks outside. He made certain to point out the asteroid's renowned podracing courses, lingering on the "Executioner" just long enough to see the pods screaming by in a blur of whirling turbines and belching plasma.

    "I'm surprised any of this survived," Jaina remarked, gesturing to the long roots of metal corridors, domes, and spires that peaked up through the surface.

    "Most of it had to be completely rebuilt," the guard explained, clearly pleased she was taking an interest. "We were fortunate that the Yuuzhan Vong only leveled the asteroid instead of obliterating it. Most of the prison lies beneath the surface, you see, and while the damage there too was... extensive, with many lives being lost, the structure itself remained largely intact, giving us at least a start towards reconstruction."

    "You must be very proud."

    "We are, thank you," he smiled as they reached a wide turbolift with a curved back wall, and he held his hand out, gesturing politely that she should go in first.

    "I understand that Aurra Sing was transferred here again after she was apprehended in Hapan space," Jaina replied as her guards joined her inside the lift and the Bothan began punching something into the keypad on the panel beside the door.

    "Oh yes, we're very glad to have her back here after she took advantage of the attack and escaped," the Iktotchi said.

    "Glad isn't the word I would use," his partner grumbled as the door hissed shut and the turbolift began plunging down through the asteroid.

    "You are so negative. Just be quiet if you don't have anything compelling to add. You're making her feel unwelcome."

    "I'm just trying to warn her that having scum like Sing here might make the galaxy safer, but it makes things inside more dangerous," the Bothan huffed.

    Instead of arguing, the Iktotchi looked sudden
  18. canadianjedimama Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 28, 2008
    star 4
    First![face_dancing]

    And now with the review....


    o_O Not you too? *shakes head*

    :p


    =P~ And I mean that in a totally inappropriate fangirly sort of way.



    Darn it...:D

    Seriously though, Jaina's come to break her out, eh? [face_thinking] Very interesting. Will Jaina's Imperial minder will be helping with this?

    Jaina and Tahiri's Excellent Adventure. Awesome.

    I really hope it's not a Bogus Journey.


    Nice post, Wes!

    Cyn
  19. TelannaTani Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jun 28, 2005
    star 3
    Second.

    Curiouser and curiouser. I would love to see Tahiri find some redemption - even if she has to break out of prison to do it. That's going to be a challenge, but nothing those two can't handle.

    Interesting concept, the Nightsister Blood Trail thing. Is it canon or an original concept?

    Are you sure you only want to post once a week? :D
  20. DARTH_MU Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2005
    star 4
    tertius

    what with you writing two fics of a similar nature....

    I thought that this was Land of the Dead and figured that I missed the part where Tahiri was turned by Callista and Darth Havok before finally caught on that this is Blood Trail.

    Oh man.

    Even Luke forgive Tahiri, sort of. Who could figure that Han and Leia would be so...

    unforgiving.

    Geez, c'mon.

    I guess blood is thicker than water. If that were Caedus locked in there, Leia would kiss his toes in a new yor, um, I mean Coruscant second.

    night sister blood thingy: Canon!

  21. jedi_princess18 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 7, 2005
    star 3
    It appears Jaina won't be leaving alone...

    Tahiri's thought is an interesting one. I really like how this is unfolding.
  22. SilSolo Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 5, 2004
    star 5
    is she breaking Tahiri out of prison?
  23. corran2 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 16, 2006
    star 4
    It amazes me how you can write 2 stories so differently. This one is starting to feel a little noirish, with all the mysteries. Love your characterization of Post Invincible Tahiri. Laughed out loud at the wild night line. Great stuff. Is Jaina going to stage a prison break? Guess we'll find out soon enough, right?
  24. Jag4Me Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 29, 2008
    star 6
    You had me thinking she was actually going to see Aurra Sing.[face_thinking] I guess Tahiri makes sense...but what the heck is
    Ben going to visit her for?[face_shame_on_you]
    The wild night comment is priceless...sounds like banter from back when they were all friends.

    Surely she's not going to break Tahiri out of there?[face_worried] Hopefully Cem is out there watching to cover Jaina's backside if things go bad.
  25. DARTH_MU Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2005
    star 4
    See, now it's come to this.

    There exist people who hate Tahiri.

    Ius caecus est.
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