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Before - Legends Book-A-Minute JA

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by female_obi_wan, May 28, 2003.

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  1. female_obi_wan

    female_obi_wan Jedi Youngling star 3

    Aug 1, 2002
    Haven't had time to read all the books? :D

    For anyone who wants the real book-a-minute,it's at

    Book-A-Minute JA

    JA#1-the rising force

    Obi-Wan: Can I be your apprentice?

    Qui-Gon: No.

    JA#2-the dark rival

    Obi-Wan: Can I be your apprentice?

    Qui-Gon: Okay.

    JA#3-the hidden past

    Qui-Gon: Here's a rock.

    [the rock saves Obi-Wan from losing his memory.]

    JA#4-the mark of the crown

    [A few things happen. The only one worth noting is the sword duel.]

    JA#5-the defenders of the dead

    Obi-Wan: I'm leaving the Jedi Order to help a pretty,intelligent girl and her friends save a planet.

    Qui-Gon:'ll be doing just what my old apprentice did and scar me for life! Don't go!

    Obi-Wan: Tough cookies.

    JA#6-the uncertain path

    [Pretty,intelligent girl dies]

    Obi-Wan: Can I come back?

    Qui-Gon: If you must.

    JA#7-the captive temple

    [Xanatos,Qui-Gon's old apprentice,tries to kill Yoda]

    Obi-Wan: Can you take me back?

    Qui-Gon: Maybe later.

    JA#8-the day of reckoning

    [Xanatos kills himself]

    Obi-Wan: NOW will you take me back?

    Qui-Gon: Oh,all right.

    JA#9-the fight for truth

    Siri: I'm smarter than you.

    Obi-Wan: No you're not.

    [Some foreshadowing is thrown in for good measure.]

    JA#10-the shattered peace

    [The Jedi go to a very nice place. Two people who didn't like each other wind up liking each other by the end. And probably a few other things happen too.]

    JA#11-the deadly hunter

    Didi: Help me!

    The Jedi: Oh,alright.

    [Qui-Gon gets captured]

    JA#12-the evil experiment

    Jenna: Prepare to DIE!

    Qui-Gon: Obi-Wan,get over here and help me.

    JA#13-the dangerous rescue

    [There is a rescue. It is dangerous.]


    Obi-Wan: They're putting me on trial for murder!

    Qui-Gon: I'm staying with my girlfriend. Be back later. Have a nice time.

    JA#14-the ties that bind

    Qui-Gon: Tahl,I'm in love with you.

    Tahl: I'm in love with you too.

    [She gets kidnapped.]

    JA#15-the death of hope

    [...and she DIES!]

    JA#16-the call to vengence

    Qui-Gon: You killed the woman I love! Die!

    Tahl: Stop it.

    Qui-Gon: Okay,but I'm still gonna mope.

    JA#17-the only witness

    Qui-Gon: Still moping.

    Obi-Wan: Lena is very beautiful...

    Qui-Gon: You have an infatuation.

    Fans: Look who's talking.

    JA#18-the threat within

    [Everything is okay again. The Jedi go a planet with a situation that is a lot like what happened in JA#5 so Obi-Wan can prove how mature he's become. The end!...well,nearly.]

    JASE2-the followers

    Obi-Wan: Look! A Sith holocron!

    Anakin: And a mad scientist!

    [They chase the holocron,along with the mad scientist.]

  2. Hananiah

    Hananiah Jedi Master star 4

    Jan 15, 2003
    This is soo funny I love these really.
    You've mamaged to compress years worth of angst into something that left me giggling.
    This rocks will yuo do this for JQ?
  3. Obi the Kid

    Obi the Kid Jedi Padawan star 4

    Apr 13, 2000
    HAHAHAHAH! This is brilliant!!!
  4. Sabe126

    Sabe126 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 18, 2002
    Now I don't have to read the books! ROTFL! :)
  5. Knight-Ander

    Knight-Ander Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jul 19, 2002
  6. Siri_Kuimini

    Siri_Kuimini Jedi Youngling star 1

    Feb 6, 2003

    v. good.
  7. Calayka_Bele

    Calayka_Bele Jedi Youngling star 3

    Nov 7, 2000
    That was great! A wonderfully clear and to-the-point summary of the JA series.

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