Breath of Night (Obi, Qui, & now Dooku!) **COMPLETED**

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Cascadia, Oct 8, 2002.

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  1. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Well, I don't like to work on more than one story at the same time, but I think Remnants in the Mind only has about four posts left, and this beginning came so quickly that I thought I would go on and post it. I'm not exactly sure where I'm going with this and Remnants has the higher priority, so please be patient. :)

    EDIT Remnants is done, so this story will be updated regularly now.


    TITLE: BREATH OF NIGHT
    AUTHOR: Cascadia
    TIME: 6 years pre-TPM, Obi-Wan is 19
    RATING: PG
    CATEGORY: Drama/Angst, Non-Slash
    SUMMARY: A terrible disaster leaves Obi-Wan to care for his master and alone to battle the guilt in his heart, all the while lost on a strange world where choices can leave them with more than they thought they had bargained for.
    ARCHIVE: Please ask first. Sites who have previously archived any of my stories may archive any of them that they want to without asking.
    DISCLAIMER: All recognizable characters are the property of Lucasfilm Limited. All the rest belong to me. I receive no profit from this.
    *******


    PROLOGUE

    It was all my fault.

    It was deep within the gloomy mountains of the Dibarien hinterlands, where the smoky mists rose from endless waterfalls, and collected in the dreary clouds that always hung about the peaks. All fell under a sheen of dew, enlivened, and yet drowning in the sorrows of never-ending humidity. Gangly trees, creeping vines, and wildflowers blooming in the shadowy recesses of crags, stretched for sunlight - for life - that seemed unattainable to even the tallest. It was said that even on the clearest day, only a faint glow of sunlight penetrated the atmosphere above the mountains, to settle mysteriously on the landscape below.

    Within the deep murk of a cave, high along one mountain, he sat huddled under the folds of his robe. He was alone, because he wanted to be. Because he had to be. Because the one who would have been with him could not.

    The light of a glow rod harshly broke the darkness where he sat and clambered up the walls, gradually dimming into nonexistence. He shivered lightly as unwanted images came to mind. Images of . . . .

    No. He would not think of it now. Not if he could.

    But the angry cries of the twisting wind and the ghastly screams of the Dibari nomads would not fall to a whisper. Their sounds echoed menacingly through his head, replaying the terror - the disaster - that had left him alone. As if conspiring, the images rose up and grasped for him, tearing the living soul out of him.

    For the fallen and wounded lay below, in a makeshift camp built with the remains of their possessions that had not been carried away or ripped apart by the tornado.

    Threddash, the Dibari had called it. The shriek of terror.

    It had been a horrible wonder, to him, how the nomads had so quickly accepted the twister's havoc wrought upon them. To do it so easily, without anger for nature's cruelty.

    What once had been a thriving community of grass huts and abundance, had become a littered landscape of destruction . . . and death.

    One small child had died in the disaster. Because he had failed to see the child in a moment of temporary panic. Because he had left the child alone.

    No one blamed him. No one needed to, for he drove enough blame into himself for the entire people.

    In that black memory, when the nomads had settled in the deep ditches to escape the coming winds, that small child had come running. Running all alone across the field as the dark twister whirled menacingly toward it. Then, his master had ordered him to stay with the people, and had dashed out to recover the child himself. He had watched in horror as the howling winds had picked up and flung the two through the air - his master and the child.

    When they had found them in the wake the tornado, the child was dead and Qui-Gon, unconscious. Since waking, the Jedi master had remained in a paralyzed state - unable to move or communicate. He was essentially a vegetable.

    The Dibari could do nothing for him. Nor could
  2. CYNICAL21 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 8, 2001
    star 4
    Oh, Cas- you're going to do it again, aren't you? You're just going to yank my heart right out of my chest and stomp on it, aren't you? I'm not sure - but I think you already did.

    How broken and damaged can one lonely soul be?

    CYN
  3. Wild_Huntress Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 15, 2002
    star 4
    Oh my goodness. This is amazing. I need more! Wow. Speechless here.
  4. Arwen-Jade_Kenobi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Feb 9, 2002
    star 5
    Do not even THINK of leaving it like that!!!

    More soon!!!
  5. obi_ew Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 14, 2002
    star 5
    :eek: You posted a new fic! [face_plain] :( :_| Oh my I'm overcome with emotion! :) Very eloquent and heart wrenching so far! I'm so happy! :D
  6. obi_ew Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Apr 14, 2002
    star 5
    Much too good to be all the way down here! :D
  7. Jedi_Suzuran Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 22, 2002
    star 5
    Wow. That was sad and beautiful. :eek:

    I'm in awe. :eek:
  8. Obi the Kid Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 13, 2000
    star 4
    Wow! What a way to set up a story. Great vivid images!

    Looking forward to more!

    Obi
  9. sheleigh Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jan 31, 2002
    star 4
    Cas- you are just trying to kill us aren't you? That was so heart-wrenching... poor Obi-Wan! (You get me saying that a lot)

    Oh, but what a wonderful start- absolutely can not wait for more! :)
  10. Jovieve Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 19, 2002
    star 4
    Angst, here we come!
  11. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Thanks for the great response! Like I said, my other fic comes first, but I'll work on this one when Remnants in the Mind gets too frustrating - as it frequently has. I think this should be much easier to write too . . . I hope! :(

    CYN I'm sorry. Should I call the paramedics? :( I just don't know why I like to put Obi-Wan through so much torment. Maybe it's a psychological thing. I don't know, but thanks for reading!

    Wild_Huntress Thanks! I'll get more done as soon as I can. :)

    Arwen-Jade_Kenobi Don't worry. I won't leave it like this. Thanks for reading! :)

    obi_ew Thanks! Hmm. Now just why do such portraits of devastation make us so happy? :D Thanks for the up.

    Jedi_Suzuran Thanks! I'm so glad you like it! :)

    Obi the Kid Thanks! This beginning only took me about two hours - which is fast for me. I'm glad it came off so well. :)

    sheleigh Thanks! Yes, I just love to write heart wrenching things. :D

    Jovieve Thanks! I love angst, too. ;)
  12. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    For those who have been following my other fic, Remnants in the Mind, I just updated it at fanfiction.net.

    :)
  13. Arwyn_Whitesun Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 13, 2002
    star 4
    Great beginning, Cascadia! Truly chilling, poignant and heart-stopping at the same time. And lovely title, BTW. :) Very, very interested to see where this is going. I love fics about Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon, so will keep an eye on this one. :D
  14. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Arwyn Thanks! I'm glad you like the story! :) This title was the third one I had in mind before I decided on it. It seems like settling on titles is one of the hardest things for me. I'll get more up as soon as I can.
  15. shanobi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 11, 2001
    star 4
    Oh Cas, how could you do this to me? :) Another fic that I will have to keep track of when DRL allows? You had to have known that I could not pass up a new fic by you :D

    Your descriptive quality, as always, continues to amaze me. This looks to be another of those fics that will pull at my heartstrings and having me longing to offer comfort that I can never give to our precious Obi-Wan.

    I will be checking on this whenever I am able to make it here, and now i'm off to check out the new Remnants post :)

    Great start Cas.
  16. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    I'm evil, Shan. That's why. :D But really, I had this written for a few days and really wanted to post it. Remnants has been so frustrating for me to write, and I wanted something to post here to take my mind off of it when it gets to me.

    I'm starting to have an idea where I'm going with this. Hope to have more up soon.

    Thanks for reading! :)
  17. kasiaskywalker Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    May 1, 2002
    star 3
  18. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Thank you, kasiaskywalker! :)
  19. shanobi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 11, 2001
    star 4
    I forgot to mention earlier that I really liked this title also :)

    I am horrible with titles, Cas. I may just call on you for some suggestions for my next fic. Seriously.

    I am still sticking to my guns about finishing my new fic before I start posting it :) It's going kind of slow right now, but it's going.

    Once I get to the half way point I may think twice about it, but for now I have no problem with waiting. It's just a little frustrating that I don't get as much time to write as i'd like, but I think of all kinds of things i'd like to add here and there so maybe the fic will be the better for it. I hope so :D

    Great post with Remnants too btw!! Great cliffie :) Only 3 to 4 posts left? :( Too bad, but then that means you can focus on this one :) Cool.

    --Shan
  20. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    I'm glad you like the title, shan. :) And sure, I can help you with a title if you want. :) I'm glad to hear your fic's coming along. And waiting to post it has its advantages, like you said. It should be really good.

    [face_blush]Thanks so much for the comments about Remnants. That last part was one of the most difficult parts to get right. I can't seem to get in the right mood to write the next part though. I hope I do soon, so I won't have a band of angry readers after my head. 8-}
  21. Sheila Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Oct 6, 2002
    star 4
    Oh my, another terrific story to follow. This first post was beautifully written. You write psychological angst with the best of them and I am sure Obi-Wan is in for some severe torment. My heart already aches for him and it is only the first post.

  22. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Thanks so much for your comments, Sheila! :) I'm always happy to have another reader.
  23. shanobi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Dec 11, 2001
    star 4
    Just an 'UP' for ya, Cas :)
  24. PadawanKitara Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Dec 31, 2001
    star 5
    Just found this one- more soon?
  25. Cascadia Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 15, 2002
    star 4
    Thanks for the 'up', Shan. :)

    PK Don't worry. I've never abandoned a fic that I've started posting. I will continue with this, but the updates will be slow until my other fic is finished. Thanks so much for reading. :) I appreciate the time anyone takes to leave a reply.
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