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  1. In Memory of LAJ_FETT: Please share your remembrances and condolences HERE

Breath of Night (Obi, Qui, & now Dooku!) **COMPLETED**

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Cascadia, Oct 8, 2002.

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  1. Cascadia

    Cascadia Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 15, 2002
    Jovieve You're right. Obi-Wan wouldn't have cared. And his denial was only his immediate reaction. He'll feel much differently soon. :)
     
  2. Jenny_The_Jedi_Girl

    Jenny_The_Jedi_Girl Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 2001
    grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr i really want to kill that king with my bare hands!!!
     
  3. Cascadia

    Cascadia Jedi Padawan star 4

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    Apr 15, 2002
    Jenny [face_laugh] Yay! A new reader! :D
     
  4. Mel_J

    Mel_J Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Jan 6, 2003
    Poor Obi-Wan, trust the kid not be aware of any pitfalls and hidden 'small-print' in his desperation to save his Master though I bet it wouldn't have mattered even if he did know. But why do I get the distinct feeling it will be Obi-Wan who'll be needing the help soon?
     
  5. Cascadia

    Cascadia Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 15, 2002
    Mel_J Yay! Another new reader! Desperate padawans don't read fine print - especially loyal, guilt-ridden ones. And I think you're right about Obi-Wan needing help. ;)
     
  6. Cascadia

    Cascadia Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 15, 2002
    I have a very short scene finished, but it's hardly worth commenting on. I want to write one more scene before I update. :)

    In other news, I've been having a terrible time with my computer today. I hope it's nothing serious. I'm just letting you know in case I disappear for awhile, then you'll know what's up.
     
  7. jedi7

    jedi7 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jan 8, 2002
    UP...from a lurker... 7 :)
     
  8. Cascadia

    Cascadia Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 15, 2002
    jedi7 :D Thanks for the up! I feel so appreciated to get an up. Come out of lurking any time you want.


    Also, I've been writing a missing scene from one of my other fics, Remnants in the Mind today. I know it sounds a little silly, but I felt that there was something that could have been clearer. It's not necessarily anything important, but I just wanted to make it a little more clear. It's PG, so I'll post it here in a day or two. It's just about finished. Then, I'll have up the next part of Breath in a few days. :)
     
  9. Jenny_The_Jedi_Girl

    Jenny_The_Jedi_Girl Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 2001
    YAY! you know i have read all your storys cas and i love every single one!!!
     
  10. Cascadia

    Cascadia Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 15, 2002
    That's a sweet thing to say, Jenny! [face_blush] I'll put the missing scene up tomorrow.
     
  11. Jenny_The_Jedi_Girl

    Jenny_The_Jedi_Girl Jedi Padawan star 4

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    Jul 16, 2001
    Well it's true girl and Remnants in the Mind is one of my favorite ones next to this one!!!!!!!!
     
  12. Cascadia

    Cascadia Jedi Padawan star 4

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    Apr 15, 2002
  13. Cow_Girl

    Cow_Girl Jedi Grand Master star 5

    Registered:
    Jun 15, 2001
    Wow!

    I just found this story and I must say that I really enjoying it, please keep up the great work :D
     
  14. CYNICAL21

    CYNICAL21 Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 8, 2001
    Hmmmm - just catching up, here, Cas- and I'm thinking that there's a major stumbling block for Obi-Wan performing as a gladiator for these Neanderthals - namely, a Jedi would never engage in mortal combat in what is essentially a sporting event, no matter how the locals choose to dress it up as a means for achieving peace. It remains, at rock bottom, a blood sport.

    How would his new 'ownere' enjoy watching him refuse to defend himself, and choose death before dishonor. He is, after all, our noble Obi - no matter how young and confused.

    On the other hand, I may be totally off the mark. I'm still readapting to cyber SW here. :D

    CYN
     
  15. Jenny_The_Jedi_Girl

    Jenny_The_Jedi_Girl Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 16, 2001
    ** puts in her heavy metal cd and blast up the volume as she head bangs to the music**

    Hey i have to do something to pass the time while waiting for another post!!
     
  16. Cascadia

    Cascadia Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 15, 2002
    Cow_Girl :D Thanks! I'm glad you found it.

    CYN You're absolutely right! Obi-Wan is Obi-Wan and will not murder or do any other horrendous thing. Thanks for pointing that out, though, in case I wasn't thinking. :D I already have something in mind about how to go about this, so I hope it turns out okay.

    Jenny [face_laugh] I'll try to hurry it up!

     
  17. Cascadia

    Cascadia Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Apr 15, 2002
    This is only the one scene I mentioned that I had done. The next scene is taking longer than I wanted, so I'll toss this out to hold you until I get it finished. :)

    Also, I have a short vignette that is a missing scene from my fic, Remnants in the Mind. Go check that out if you want. It's called Gift of the Crimson Flower. Follow the link to read. :D

    *******


    CHAPTER 5~Prison of My Dreams
    Part 1

    "Mine?" he whispered, eyes round and sweeping incredulously over his new room.

    It was elegantly stylish and embellished in fine furniture and exquisite design, just as Qui-Gon's room had been, only this one was in pale blues, cobalt, ivory, and sable. Sheer baby blue netting hung abundantly from a ring at the end of a chain from the ceiling, and pooled over the bed like a silken waterfall. An ivory marble fireplace was flecked in navy and sat next to black metal-work doors inlaid with cut glass, now gleaming in brilliant natural light.

    The click of the deadbolt behind him drew his attention from the enchanting room. Whirling around, Obi-Wan tried the door's knob. It was locked, of course. Why would anything go in his favor?

    That would not have been a problem under normal circumstances, but the wide gold bands they had placed around his wrists had frighteningly disrupted his connection to the Force. They must have something in them that caused that. There were Force-users here, so they had to be aware of what they were doing.

    He walked across the dark wood-paneled floor to the balcony doors. Throwing them open, he stepped into the brightness of day, his russet hair set afire coppery bright. It was warm, the sun beating sizzling rays on the world below. His eyes scanned the view. Ocean waters glowed turquoise and washed relentlessly upon sands shimmery white, frothy foam at its shallow edges. There was a tall granite stone wall that ran all along the coast for as far he as could see in both directions, a strip of beach between it and the sea. He spotted several men stationed on the top of the wall, soldiers by appearances.

    It was too far to jump to the ground, and besides that, he should wait until Qui-Gon settled everything. His master would get him out of this. Wouldn't he?

    Tramping back into his room, he threw himself on the bed. It was strangely comforting, the silk cobalt coverlet soft and smooth against his skin, the lulling fragrance of something similar to dasily tea spice seeping from the fabric. The bed held him safely and surely.

    Yet, at the same time, he felt adrift on a cloud, lost from his past, the future a shadowed passageway leading to an unknown.

    He wanted so much to leave and go home. After exhausting himself caring for his master, trying to repair the comm unit so they could leave, and bearing the guilt for a child's death and his master's possible life-changing injury, he had been forced onto a path to pay for it all under terms he had not understood.

    Until too late.

    In the haze of despair and guilt that he had been in when they had first arrived here, he had not seen that Loresce's offer had come with conditions. Had she tried to trick him?

    Did it really matter anymore?

    Looking back, it had not been a wise choice, but the padawan knew that he would probably do it again to help his master. He would willingly pay any price to correct his mistake that could have cost Qui-Gon his future.

    By the Force, maybe this was his fate. It had been his fault, afterall, Qui-Gon's injury had.

    And there was the child's death.

    Lyril was a beautiful child. Her dark crimson hair had fanned out on the ground around her head like the soft halo of a sun. Her small face had held a lovely peace, unlike the terror that had twisted it as she ran across the field, away from the whirling tornado.

    When he shifted, he noticed the dampness of the coverlet beneath his face, where tears had dripped from reddened eyes. After a muffled sniff,
     
  18. Arwen-Jade_Kenobi

    Arwen-Jade_Kenobi Jedi Knight star 5

    Registered:
    Feb 9, 2002
    Awe, poor Obi *hugs*

    More soon right?
     
  19. Lieutenant_Page

    Lieutenant_Page Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 17, 2001
    Aww Poor guy :( He goes through so much. He's incredibly strong to handle all this without totally breaking down.
     
  20. LuvEwan

    LuvEwan Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Mar 24, 2002
    Wow. Cas, just...WOW.

    [face_shocked]

    Tear-soaked lashes swept over weary eyes, and they closed against the beautiful sight of his new prison.

    That was a perfect sentence that stood out from the others, though they too were flawless. I can't believe how well you articulate the feelings of Obi.

    Made my day. :D

    Also, the line about his russet hair lit to copper was just... [face_blush]

    I love this story so much! [face_love]
     
  21. Shaindl

    Shaindl Jedi Grand Master star 4

    Registered:
    Jun 18, 2002
    You've got the despairing young man's thoughts down perfectly, Cas. That was a great examination of his feelings. Can't wait for the next part!

    Shaindl
     
  22. obi_ew

    obi_ew Jedi Master star 5

    Registered:
    Apr 14, 2002
    * pops Obi upside the head * Snap out of it! [face_plain] Sorry Cas but I hate seeing Obi so down on himself. :( So are you going to explain why his confidence is so low? Soon? :D
     
  23. PaddyJuan

    PaddyJuan Jedi Master star 4

    Registered:
    Nov 15, 2002
    sniffle. poor sad depressed obi.
     
  24. Wild_Huntress

    Wild_Huntress Jedi Padawan star 4

    Registered:
    Jul 15, 2002
    Wow! Awesome post Cas. I'm just.... speechless.

    You know, your work, along with a few other writers', is very inspiring when I attempt my own fic writing. ;)
     
  25. Mel_J

    Mel_J Jedi Youngling star 1

    Registered:
    Jan 6, 2003
    For someone who will one day become the most renowned Jedi, Obi-Wan has always had serious confidence issues. It would be so like him to berate himself for something completely out of his control.
     
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