Beyond - Legends Broken: a three part Kyp/Jaina- Link 11/30

Well, I decided to celebrate my return to the boards with a short story. It's a three-poster K/J fic.

There is a sequel now in the works; you can read it here: Whole.

Obviously (and unfortunately), none of this belongs to me. It's Lucas's universe, characters, and concepts; I'm just having a little fun toying with them.

Here's part one:

-------
He loved her.

It was easy for him to admit now. At first he had struggled with himself, had tried to deny the emotion she could so effortlessly call forth. But he had lost his inner war. No matter how vehemently he tried to assert that she was a friend, a companion, a partner- he failed.

She was more.

It was easy to understand why, in a way.

She knew what it was like to soar through starlit space in peace, just pilot and ship and the Force working together in a test of skill- to feel the exhilaration of Lando?s Folly, the thrill of fancy flying for the enjoyment it provided, to have the Force singing pure and clear through her as her hands danced across the controls.

But she also knew what it was like to fight for control of a battered and wounded ship, dodging coralskippers and debris that had once been the ships of wingmates, trying to desperately ignore the pain of lives suddenly missing in the Force. She knew the guilt of surviving battles when so many that flew out with her didn?t; she knew a commander?s regret of leading good people to their deaths.

She knew the peace of being whole, of being connected through the Force to every living thing around her. She knew the tranquility meditation could sometimes bring, the satisfaction a sparring match with a fellow Jedi could call forth. She knew what it was like to feel a part of something larger than her- to feel as though she was fighting for a cause, that she was making a difference in the galaxy.

But she also understood the ever-present temptation. She knew of the darkness that whispered seductively just under the surface of the light. She knew of the quick and easy path to power; she had followed it just as he once had. She knew the feelings of pain and loss as well as he did; she understood anger and the dark side. She had struggled through the same journey back to the light that he had undergone years earlier.

It was easy to understand why he loved her. She was everything he admired: a pilot, a Jedi. She was loyal and brave. She would speak her mind despite the consequences; she would fight for what she felt was worth defending. She brought out the best and the worst in him. She could make him laugh. She could make him feel as though he were normal- as though his past wasn?t looming large behind him, overshadowing the way everyone saw him. It wasn?t there for her; her own past somehow met his, and she could see him for who he really was.

He didn?t remember when she had somehow reached out and captured his heart with her small hands. He had tried to recall, tried to find the exact moment when something in him had set and locked so that only she could open him fully, and had failed. Not that it mattered, really, he had just wondered if it had been before or after he had lost her to that Chiss pilot.

He wished he could hate that kid. It would make everything so much simpler. But hate was of the dark side, and he had gone down that route once before, destroying everything he loved in the process.

He wouldn?t do it again. Not when she was what he loved now; not when he could lose her.

Again. He really wished he could hate that kid.

But it was probably for the best. He was tainted- destroyer of worlds, rogue Jedi, failed Master of a dead Jedi, failed leader of a dying squadron, ignored Master of a Goddess. It seemed everything he touched- everything he allowed himself to grow close to- he destroyed. Broke. Shattered. Nothing remained whole.

He had almost made that mistake with her. She had sought him out and offered him her friendship

 

Saber this was incredible! I can't wait to see the continuation of it.

~~Jilly

 

That was beautifully written Awwwwww... I'm begging for more... soon...

 

And here's part two, from Jaina's POV.

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She hadn?t felt whole in years.

It was as if something were missing; as if some part of her had somehow disappeared into space. When Anakin had died, when Jacen had vanished- those had been similar voids in her being. But she knew when those holes had been torn; she could look back and feel through the pain to when she had first been ripped asunder.

This was different.

She didn?t know when this hole had been made; she didn?t know what had caused it. All she knew was that it existed, and that it wanted to swallow her up.

She didn?t know what was missing. It was as if some essential part of her- the part that made her whole, the part that made her feel connected and content- had simply faded away and vanished, had splintered into hundreds of shards that could never be collected. But she couldn?t get a lock on what this part was. It was obvious only in its absence; it was as though some vital piece of her had decided to inform her of its presence only as it was ripped away from her and broken.

She didn?t understand it. But that was the way she felt.

Incomplete. Missing something vitally important. Broken.

She didn?t know how long she had felt this way. Years, at least. She had been trying to fill the hole long before she had acknowledged its existence. That was the only way she could gauge how long she had felt incomplete.

She had been trying to put herself back together for years. For nearly the entirety of the war. She had been whole when she had gone through Lando?s Folly; she had been whole when she had first flown with Rogue Squadron. She had even been whole at Sernpidal, the one place where she should have felt broken and empty inside. At first she thought that it had been the battle at Sernpidal that had destroyed whatever vital part that had gone missing. But there had been times after that when she had felt whole, so she had ruled out Sernpidal.

She had given up trying to figure out when, precisely, some part of her had shattered. Now she simply tried to live with a gaping void in her being. She had tried to fill the void over the years, even before she had realized that the void existed. Twin Suns, being the Trickster-Goddess, her military career, being a Jedi. She still wasn?t certain how much of her fall to the dark side was because she was searching for something- anything- to make her feel whole and complete.

It had even seemed to work for a while. That scared her, because it made the alluring voice of the dark side sweeter than ever. You were whole when you gave in, she always seemed to hear somewhere in the back of her mind. You can be whole again.

But she knew what the dark side could do; knew that it would tempt with easy answers and swift power; knew that in the end, she would still feel hollow. But the knowledge didn?t keep the dark side from tempting her.

So she had escaped the darkness and returned to her broken self. And things had improved, for a time- she was Yun-Harla, the Trickster-Goddess; she had a Jedi Master to guide her, a Master she knew understood what she had gone through, a Master she counted as a friend.

He had made her laugh when she hadn?t thought she would be able to. He had made her feel- anger, annoyance, friendship- when she hadn?t been sure she would be able to feel again. More importantly, he had made her be honest- honest to the world and honest to herself.

And she had Twin Suns; she had her pilots and her companions in mischief-making and trickster-planning.

And she had Jag.

For a time- for such a short time- she had been complete again. Unbroken.

And then she had moved on, sure that she was ready for the galaxy. She was a Solo- it was her job to save the galaxy. And her twin brother was alive and the war was finally going in their favor . . .

But she was somehow broken.

That was when she had first realized how incomplete she was. It wasn?t when the hole had been made, but it was when she had

 

JainaDurron and Lumi, thanks! Nice to know people still think I can write!
-Saber

 

Oh, believe me you can

 

I concur.

Even though I prefer Jag and Jaina.

 

Beautiful Saber, so beautiful. Hopefully the 3rd part will be less depressing, but you are really getting to the heart of what you are writing.

~~Jilly

 

Shamelessly upping my own fic. Thanks for reading people! I'm very proud of myself; I managed to get my little brother out onto the fanfic boards and away from the Jedi Draft.... wow, that's an accomplishment.

Anyway, almost finished with the last bit; should be up tomorrow or Sunday.

-Saber

 

You mean younger brother. And for the record, I was on the fanfic broads before I re-introduced you to the broads.

 

Well, here's the third part, and it's long for some reason. And rather more normally written.

-----

Kyp paused in the doorway of the conference room. He need a minute to gather his thoughts.

He needed a minute to look at her.

Jaina stood at the far end of the conference room, by the sliver of a viewport in the corner. The distant pinpoints of far-off stars provided the only light for the room; Jaina was motionless, gazing out into the stars. She wore a grey military uniform under her Jedi robe; her lightsaber, hanging at her waist, glinted dully in the silver starlight. Her hair had grown, Kyp saw, drinking in the details. It had probably begun the day in a braid, but now, when most people aboard the ship were sleeping, the braid was tattered and wisps of dark brown hair escaped the plait to frame her face and curl around her shoulders.

But what captured Kyp more than anything was the expression on her face. She looked . . . lost, he decided. Vulnerable.

Part of him ridiculed the idea of Jaina Solo being vulnerable. She was strong; she had proven her strength all throughout the war. But part of him longed to go up to her and hold her, to lend her some of his strength, to keep her safe until that lost look faded away.

With a deep, calming breath, Kyp stepped into the darkened room, letting his tight shields drop so that she could sense his presence. He made his way to her slowly, circling the conference table and the stacked chairs, until he stood beside her, staring out into the stars.

She didn?t look at him, didn?t move to acknowledge him in any way, but he felt the light brush of her mind against his, a quiet welcome. He sent a gentle caress back, and they stood in silence for a long moment.

Jaina was the first to speak. ?You?ve been away for a while,? she said, voice soft and familiar.

?Us mere mortals do have lives to attend to, Goddess.? His tone was light and jesting, but the smile didn?t quite reach his face. It had been all too hard to keep himself away from her the past few years since the war ended; now that he was speaking with her, he would keep himself under tight control. She didn?t deserve to be broken.

She didn?t look at him. ?I haven?t been a goddess in a long time, Kyp,? she sighed.

?I know. But it?s a hard habit to break.?

?How have you been??

?All right. Peace is different. I almost expect to wake up and find myself back in the middle of things again.? He glanced over at Jaina. ?I hear you?ve been promoted again. Congratulations.?

?Thanks.? Her voice was barely a whisper; she crossed her arms in front of her and hugged them tight against her chest, as if she was cold.

?How is your family??

A ghost of a smile flickered across her face for a moment; it hurt to compare it to the grin that Kyp remembered. ?They?re doing well. Jacen?s got his own family now, and Mom and Dad are back to arguing over which one of us has given them more grey hairs. Tahiri?s doing much better.?

He noticed she counted Tahiri in with her true family, but didn?t comment on it. ?That?s good. Master Skywalker said they?d be arriving soon.?

?Yes.?

When had their conversations become so stilted? Where was the bantering, the laughter? They spoke like they were polite strangers. What had happened to the easy friendship, the partnership, the comradery?

He was about to speak, to wish her a good night and leave her to her contemplations, safe from his tainted presence, when she suddenly turned to face him.

?Kyp,? she said, ?what?s wrong with me??

?Wrong?? He stared at her for a minute, but her brown eyes were sad and very serious. ?What do you mean??

?Can?t you sense it?? She uncrossed her arms and spread them wide. ?Jacen can. Uncle Luke and Aunt Mara can. Mom can even sense it sometimes. What?s wrong with me??

Tears were brimming in her eyes; Kyp forced himself to ignore them and reached out towards her with the Force. Rather than a simple brush against her mind as he had done before

 

*has tears in her eyes* that was... beeeeautiful... just the way it's supposed to be... *smiling*

 

So beautiful Saber. And Ia m going to imagine that Jacen married Tenel Ka.

~~Jilly

 

Wow, SaberBlade...this was incredible. Keep your eye out for the WFFA...I'll be nominating this fic for sure.

-JSD

 

And shamelessly upping my own fic again.
-Saber

 

Saber, I really think you should write either a sequel or a companion piece that expands more on their relationship.

~~Jilly

 

Wow, readers!

Lumi, thanks so much! It means a lot that you like it.

JainaDurron: Tenel Ka, hm? Possibly. I might be able to do that.

JSD: thanks for checking in. What's the WFFA?

All right everyone, thanks to JainaSoloDurron and all your great reviews, I'm contemplating writing a sequel, so I'll let you know once I've decided.

Also, I want to write more K/J fics but am running low on plot bunnies (you'd think since they're bunnies there would be more of them, but NOOOOOO....), so if you have any ideas or whatever, PM me and maybe I can cobble together a story.

-Saber

 

this was SOOOO beautiful!

Jez

 

Saber, PM and we can talk about some plot ideas, or you can get me on MSN messenger at JainaDurron@hotmail.com

~~Jilly

 

Saber, I just found this. Well done; I hope there will be a sequel.

 

Working on the sequal now; hopefully there will be a post up today or tomorrow, so watch for the link.

-Saber

 

Hi, just read your fic and wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed it! I am first and foremost a Luke/Mara lover, but the more I read of Kyp/Jaina, the more I like them. I just feel like Jaina is far too complex a character to be with someone as boring as Jag.

I liked the way you had Kyp so conflicted and determined to protect Jaina from himself. But I think my favorite bit was when Jaina finally realized exactly what the 'hole' inside her really was. I loved that moment of comprehension...beautifully done.

I'd love to see the sequel because I'd love to see the reactions of the Skywalker and Solo families to their new relationship! I always love to especially see Han's and Mara's reactions!

Looking forward to more....

 

Amazing! I loved reading this! My heart lurched at a few places, actually ? especially in your final post.

A sequel would be fantastic. There are so many themes you could expand on.

This was very well done, and for once, it?s a happy K/J moment! Thanks!

Am

 

Thanks everyone! I changed the title of this fic to Broken because the sequel is now up! It's called Whole, and I hope you all like it!

-Saber

 

So sweet and yet so sad.