Saga Burn! Burn! Burn! (PreAotC/Horror/ OCs, Poof, Anakin, Obi-Wan) **COMPLETE**

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  1. oqidaun Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2005
    star 5
    [image=http://circusfiretragedy.com/FanArt/burnweb2.jpg]

    Title: Burn! Burn! Burn!
    Author: oqidaun
    Timeframe: TPM-ROTS
    Characters: Obi-Wan/Anakin/Yoda/Poof/OCs
    Genre: Horror/Suspense
    Trailer: Burn!Burn!Burn!

    Author's Note: I'm currently working on an "Extended/Special Edition" of Burn! The Special Edition does not conflict with any of the plot as it stands; however, it is considerably darker and gives a broader insight into some of the subplots I've implied. I will post some of the revisions here, but in the interests of not violating the PG-13 rating I will also be posting the revisions at my fanfic journal.
    Summary: Five years after the events in The Phantom Menace, a call for assistance from an AgriCorps compound sets a Jedi Master on a collision course with an ancient evil and an approaching storm.






    There was a little girl
    Who cried:
    Fire! Fire! Fire!
    There was a little man
    Who said:
    Liar! Liar! Liar!
    And on a windy night
    They all:
    Burned! Burned! Burned!


    --Shodari Immigrant Children's Rhyme.


    Fire. Blood. Bell.
    Prologue


    AgriCorps Compound 60249-41, Shoda, Dakari Sector, Mid/Outer Rim Transition Zone

    Bright silks, soft pillows and exotic women warmed his dreams. Spice filled his nostrils and wrapped him in a blanket of euphoric smoke. Falling into the arms of a rose skinned madam, he embraced the narcotic aroma of her decadent kisses. He raised the hookah pipe to his lips and inhaled. A fit of coughing seized him. The smoke reeked of dry grass and stung his lungs. The seductress opened her mouth to speak, but the only sound to escape her lips was the clamor of a rusted bell violently tearing him from his dream world.

    Fire, blood, bell, fire, blood, bell, fire, blood, bell?the words tormented him. Frantically, he threw back the blankets and stumbled barefoot towards the window. Thick frost coated both sides of the thin glass. He could smell the smoke and hear the roar of the flames above the howling wind, but because of the frost could see nothing save the furious orange glow that filled the window. A bell clanged rhythmically adding to the chaos and his frustration of not being able to see.

    Desperately, he scratched at the frost with his fingernails. The brittle glass splintered and sliced into his hand. His bloody fingers pulled the broken shards from the pane and cast them to floor at his feet. Icy air whooshed into the room.

    An angry false sun rose on the horizon and defiled the night with its illusions. His heart threatened to rip his chest apart. Mutely, he stepped back from the window through the broken glass. A cold sweat broke across his face and he felt faint.


    The door burst open, ?She?s not in her room!?

    ?I know.? He picked a sliver of glass from his foot and finished putting on his boots. ?Who the hell do you think is ringing that damned bell.?

    Clenching his fist to stay the bleeding, he grabbed his long brown cloak and chased after the similarly dressed dark skinned woman into the hallway. At the top of the stairs, he stopped and turned.

    ?Where are you going?? she screamed.

    He did not answer and raced back to his room. The flames from outside illuminated the simple furnishings in a surreal fiery glow. Ignoring his other meager possessions, he ripped open the dresser drawer, seized a small red book and tucked it safely into his robes. The little book was cold and it burned against his chest.

    Once more he ran into the hall and finally down the stairs. Smoke bellowed into the old two story dwelling and he slowed as he approached the front door knowing what he would find on the other side.

    The world that greeted him would forever be the setting of his nightmares.


    - - -


    ?Where did she get it?? The smoke, wind and exhaustion left his voice hollow and cracked. It was the first thing he had said in twenty four
  2. Idrelle_Miocovani Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 5, 2005
    star 6
    Wow... kind of creepy. *shudders* I like it!
  3. Exeter Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 2, 2005
    star 4
    Yes! Dark stories are always welcome in my book. That was some vivid writing. Keep it coming.
  4. oqidaun Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2005
    star 5
    Chapter One:
    This kingdom is mine...


    Brutish port authorities muscled their way through the crowds of refugees checking papers, taking bribes and dragging those unable to comply with either to the deportation terminals. Desperate travelers set up impromptu bazaars in hopes of selling enough of their belongings to pay the bribes. Less resourceful individuals bartered themselves or worse their children.

    Elitrea stood in the fresher of Dalvin?s Last Drink, one of the many unlicensed taverns in the old warehouse that also masqueraded as the Mooja Intergalactic Space Port. She needed privacy and the filthy fresher seemed to be only place where she could have a moment to herself.

    In front of her the pair of fuzzy blue holograms offered little consolation. She had hoped Master M?Daw Gooli of the Council of Reconciliation, would be more sympathetic. Unfortunately, the elderly Corellian Jedi Master only shook her head and reminded her padawan of many years before to be patient. Furthermore, Gooli deferred most of Elitrea?s concerns to Yoda of the High Jedi Council who seemed irritated, or maybe it was just the bad connection.

    ?Most unfortunate, these events are.? It was impossible to read Yoda?s expression, but his voice betrayed little concern.

    ?My ship got impounded by the Mandakari Occupation and Settlement Authority before we got out of the Dakari Sector and the three commercial transports we?ve used have all had to change their courses because of hyperdrive malfunctions. I?m thinking there?s something more than ?unfortunate? to this all.?

    ?Patience, Master Elitrea.? Gooli raised her hands. ?We understand the difficulty you are having and a solution has presented itself. Anear Salot has just reported that his team has had quite a bit of success on Abregado-Rae. It?s not far from Fondor. If you can get to Fondor, Obi-Wan Kenobi can take Badour to Anear?s compound on Abregado-Rae. We feel certain that this would be in her best interests.?

    The fuzzy image of Yoda concurred. ?Benefit, the child will from Anear?s influence.?

    She exhaled, relieved not to have to take Badour all the way to Coruscant. ?I am glad to hear that Anear will accept her. Though, it?s going to be difficult to get transport out of here. It took us three weeks to get across the Mid Rim. The fighting in the Dakari sector has complicated travel in the Mid-Rim. There are a lot of refugees to contend with and the extra security. We?ve been stopped seventeen times??

    ?Wait for you, Obi-Wan and Anakin will.? Yoda interrupted.

    ?Elitrea, you must focus on the positive and make it to Fondor as quickly as possible. From there, you and Dezan will return to the Temple. I think it would be best for you both. May the Force be with you.?

    For a moment, her confidence surged and she felt the familiar warmth of the Force coursing through her veins. She left the ?fresher determined. However, when she turned the corner and saw the look on her padawan?s face, the emptiness returned.

    ?She?s doing it again??
  5. Exeter Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 2, 2005
    star 4
    Very nice. You're an incredibly skilled writer - I never read anything ambiguous or confusing. Looks like this story is going to get pretty good.
  6. Darth_Scroobius Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 1, 2005
    star 2
    Preludium-

    Ummm, yeah. So I read this yesterday, but wasn't feeling well, and was really confused so I didn't reply. I just read it again, and I'm still confused[face_worried]. I hope that it is intentional and you want us coming back for answers. Let's see if the first chapter helps.

    The little girl is kind of creepy in an M. Night Shymalan kind of way. I mean:They were going to die anyway. He is going to die anyway, but not yet. A little horror movie, especially since she killed the eopies (which I'm guessing are cow or chicken-like farm animals).

    Chapter I-

    The fighting in the Dakari sector has complicated travel in the Mid-Rim. - Ah. So we tie into your other story. Interesting. It also tells us that time has passed.

    For a moment, her confidence surged and she felt the familiar warmth of the Force coursing through her veins. She left the ?fresher determined. However, when she turned the corner and saw the look on her padawan?s face, the emptiness returned.

    ?She?s doing it again??


    With the clue from above, it becomes clear who the padawan is (otherwise I would have thought it a third-party). And I'm definitely getting a Haley-Joel-Osment-in-Sixth-Sense vibe here. I think she might be seeing dead people. Or something like that.
  7. oqidaun Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2005
    star 5
    Exeter: You've made me blush, Thanks!

    Scroob, you're confused? You? I don't believe it.

    First off, M. Night Shyamalan holds a very prestigious spot in my personal pantheon. Unbreakable was a religious experience for me. Additionally, the first "job" I ever had was writing B-Grade horror movies reviews for a little alternative press--so there'll be a little splatterpunk cheez in there along with the freaky intellectual spookiness.

    Secondly, Be cautious on the timeframe. It's actually starting 4 yrs before the other story, but remember the Dakari sector is the West Bank/Golan Heights of the Galaxy--there's always somethng going on, so that's not really important to this plot, I apologize if that's confused you. I just like to keep all my plot bunnies in the same general vicinity.

    For a reference point: Anakin is 14 yrs old.
  8. oqidaun Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2005
    star 5
    Chapter Two:
    None will be saved?


    Second only to Kuat itself, Fondor was the Galaxy?s preeminent ship building planet. The crowded streets of Fondor City attested to the different opportunities shipbuilding offered. Gifted students from the prestigious Academy of Engineering and Design, Zero-G fusion welders, investment bankers, tech representatives, ore miners and assorted opportunists rubbed elbows in the stim-caf houses along Kuat Avenue (recently renamed in honor of KDY?s substantial investment in the city beautification project). Fondor?s youthful population and vigorous economy preserved the world?s perennial boom-planet image.

    As she leaned over the edge of the steel patio railing, she allowed herself her first smile in weeks. ?You?re a sight for sore eyes, Obi-Wan.?

    ?Elitrea,? he smiled warmly and waited for her to join him. In the short time Obi-Wan had been on Fondor, he had already become a regular in the Gear House café. ?Had I heard about your difficulties earlier, we?d met up with you some where in the Inner Rim.? He motioned to the server droid to bring another mug of Alderaanean tea.

    ?I wouldn?t wish the Mooja Intergalactic Spaceport on anyone. Don?t worry about it.?

    ?You mean they?ve rebuilt it? Qui-Gon and I were there right after it was bombed and the Port Authority had moved everything across the street into an old warehouse.?

    ?No, it?s still in the warehouse. I think they just moved the sign. Fondor?s a nice change, superficial, but hopeful.? She took a cautious sip of the hot tea. ?How do you like it??

    ?Two weeks with Anakin on Fondor? He?s under the impression we?re on some sort of vacation.?

    ?He?s mechanically inclined to say the least. I have never seen someone so young, so gifted.?

    ?I think the Academy of Engineering and Design wants to recruit him. I fear I?m going to have to bludgeon him to drag him out of here. If he were only half as gifted controlling his temper and impulsiveness as he is with machines, they would be asking him what type of chair he?d like in the High Council Chamber. As it stands, I spend my days sounding like an irritable nanny droid. Of course,? he smiled wickedly. ?You have Dezan-the-Good. I don?t think there?s ever been such a scramble for a Padawan. Although, I will say that you?re missing out on a bonding experience not having had the opportunity to post bail for him.?

    ?Poor Anakin,? she laughed. ?Perhaps, your delinquent Padawan can stay here with me and Dezan while you take Badour to Abregado-Rae?

    ?I?d be lost with out him.? Obi-Wan put his hand to his forehead dramatically. ?Actually, we need to be on Corellia next week. I?m not going to be able to backtrack; it?s going to have to be a fast trip.?

    Elitrea?s mouth tightened. ?She?s difficult, Obi-Wan.?

    ?What do you mean?? Her sudden change in mood caught him off guard.

    ?It?s hard to describe. She has rather elaborate visions and a tendency to act on them?violently. She?s a bit much for a Padawan to deal with. Dezan is nearly twenty years old and she has managed to rile him. Anakin is only fourteen and you?ve said yourself that he?s high strung.?

    ?This is what happened on Shoda?? Obi-Wan had only heard parts of the story.

    ?The Council for Reconciliation decided she would do best in the corps and shortly after her eighth birthday sent her to Banner Weesoik?s project on Shoda.?

    ?Banner was the only classmate I ever remembered being happy to go to the Corps. He?s a good organizer.? Obi-Wan also remembered him as a clown.

    ?Banner sent a message to the Reconciliation Council that he was concerned,? she continued. ?Initially, Badour got on well with the village children to the point that some of the local families talked about adopting her since she was still so young, but then one day the children didn?t want to play with her. The families didn?t want her around. Apparently, she started telling people when they were going to die.?

    ?Delightful habit for a small child.?

    ?Very, and she has a tendency to be correct.? Elitrea toyed absently with her s
  9. DarthIshtar Chosen One

    Member Since:
    Mar 26, 2001
    star 9
    Chilling and intriguing. More?
  10. Darth_Scroobius Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 1, 2005
    star 2
    ...missing out on a bonding experience not having had the opportunity to post bail for him

    [face_laugh] I want to see that story. Obi-Wan bailing Anakin out of jail. Ha-ha-ha.

    So we see what disturbing special power Badour has. She has rather elaborate visions and a tendency to act on them?violently. Violently? Indeed. Obi-Wan is in for a treat. Wonder if she'll tell him how he dies?
  11. Exeter Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 2, 2005
    star 4
    The detail in this story is superb. These characters are very intriguing - they've got me definitely wanting more. Great work in crafting an eerie feel, too.
  12. oqidaun Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2005
    star 5
    Chapter Three
    My will be done?


    Anakin glanced up at the chrono and launched into a litany of curses a Hutt would find impressive and fortunately, Obi-Wan was no where to be found. What had once been a secondary cooling unit spread out in seventy three pieces around the lanky Padawan. The mysterious disappearance of the seventy-fourth piece inspired the Huttese profanity. Two hours earlier, the replacement of the relay switch seemed like a really great idea, now he was not quite so certain. He reached for the ship?s holo manual, which he sincerely believed had been written by one of Yoda?s kinsbeings, and the missing gasket spacer tumbled out of his sleeve. A look of relief washed across his face as he leapt to his feet to catch the wayward part before it rolled down into the grating in front of the small ship?s ramp.

    At the foot of the ramp stood a tired looking young man. Anakin almost failed to recognize him.

    ?Dez?? Anakin quickly smiled. The other Padawan was older, but Anakin had sparred with him a number of times in the Temple. ?Hey, welcome to Fondor!?

    Dezan regarded him blankly before responding. ?Anakin.?

    Preoccupied with his cooling unit assembly concerns, Anakin failed to notice the contempt in his voice. ?Come lend me a hand, will you? I?ve got to get this thing back together before Obi-Wan finds out or he?ll chew my head off.?

    ?Certainly.?

    Quietly, Dezan watched as Anakin reassembled the cooling unit. After several attempts to draw him into conversation failed, Anakin lapsed into one of his long winded monologues about growing up on Tatooine.

    ?My mom used to make this soup out of figs. We couldn?t always get figs as they?re imported and expensive, but she would for special occasions?like my birthday. They?ve made it for me at the Temple before, but it doesn?t taste the same. I give them credit for trying, but it doesn?t do it justice. It doesn?t taste like home. You know the first chance I get?when I really get to go somewhere I want to go?I?m going home and having my mother?s cooking.?

    When Anakin spoke of ?home? it always meant Tatooine. His unceasing one-sided discussions of growing up on the desert planet often alienated him from the other Padawans who felt he lorded his ?normal? childhood over them. The sainthood of Shmi Skywalker was well known by his cohorts.

    While the younger Padawan spoke, Dezan fantasized about putting the screwdriver he had been nervously toying with through Anakin?s skull. The polite smile and occasional nod as Anakin rambled on about his mother had nothing to do with the story or Dezan?s desire to be a good listener. Instead, his expressions were manifestations of his eagerness to commit a brutal murder. In his mind he moved through the paces repeatedly. Ten minutes into Anakin?s tale, he had already killed him in his mind fifteen times.

    Anakin was a meter and a half away. It would take two steps, yet he would have the element of surprise. Carefully, he checked the sharpness of the end of the screwdriver and gauged how much pressure it would take to ram it through his forehead. He decided it would be best to grasp the screwdriver with his right hand while simultaneously driving his left elbow into Anakin?s windpipe. If he hit him hard enough in the throat, then he could slow down and make certain his victim understood what was happening. He would use his own hands, a makeshift weapon and his desperation to destroy him?not the Force.

    Abruptly, Anakin stopped his Tatooine spiel. ?Dez, is something wrong??

    ?I could save the Galaxy with this?? He wrapped his fingers tightly around the handle, his eyes darkened. He started to move forward.

    ?A screwdriver?? Anakin straightened up and folded his arms; suddenly wary of the other Padawan, but not enough to rein in his challenge. ?How do you suppose??

    Visibly Dezan broke out in a cold sweat. He had not anticipated Anakin?s reaction. He starred at the tool and his shaking hands. Panic threatened to overtake him. He struggled with the violent desire coiled up in his stomach
  13. Darth_Scroobius Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 1, 2005
    star 2
    I'm surprised that Anakin even bothered looking at the directions. I guess maybe he would after he'd taken it apart and couldn't figure it out.

    Of course Anakin would regale other Padawans with tales of his childhood, but I had never thought of it before. Nice touch.

    While the younger Padawan spoke, Dezan fantasized about putting the screwdriver he had been nervously toying with through Anakin?s skull.

    Psycho! Though I would not recommend using the screwdriver on the skull. The eyeball would be my first choice; if he really wanted to get him in the skull he should definitely go for the temple, though, with the thinnest bone in the skull. Not that I've ever thought about anything like that before. No, not me. [face_worried]

    There should have been no turning back the moment he seized the screwdriver, but now his failure was complete.

    Nice reference. Anakin has a knack for turning others into complete failures.

    I'm curious as to how Dezan got this knowledge of the future. I thought Badour was the one with the visions, but that could just be me being confused again. It's rare, but that does happen.
  14. Exeter Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 2, 2005
    star 4
    We've long needed more creepy stories like this. That was great when Dezan was devising ways to kill Anakin during the conversation. I love it.

    Scroobius - Psycho! Though I would not recommend using the screwdriver on the skull. The eyeball would be my first choice; if he really wanted to get him in the skull he should definitely go for the temple, though, with the thinnest bone in the skull.

    Who's more psychotic - the psycho, or the psycho that corrects him? :p

    As for Dezan's "presience", could be that Badour told him when he'd die and he decided to correct the problem.
  15. oqidaun Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2005
    star 5
    But, you know what's even a tad bit more psycho?

    ...my muse.

  16. oqidaun Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2005
    star 5
    Chapter Four:
    Guide the blind?


    The gray sky wept and it filled her with joy. Ten feet in front of the sour faced man she jumped in puddles and squealed with delight as the drops grew heavier. Her tiny hands eagerly patted the bark of the narrow Zan?thor fruit trees. She struggled against the temptation to climb the trees and steal their unripe fruit. A glance over her shoulder reminded her that the frowning Jedi still followed. He promised her sweets if she would stay in sight as they walked to the dock. Badour liked sweets and was on her best behavior. She could hardly contain her glee as she waited anxiously for him under the awning outside the sweet shop.

    ?Aren?t you a happy girl?? A woman exiting the shop paused beside her.

    ?Of course I am,? she beamed. ?I?ve never seen the trees when I?ve been here before.?
    The woman adjusted her cloak and looked down at the plain faced child. ?Sweetie, those trees are twenty years old. Are you sure you?ve been here when the trees weren?t??

    ?Several times, except when I?m here the sky is red and the trees are on fire.? She nervously bounced up and down wishing the Jedi would walk faster. ?Oh, and that building,? she pointed across the street, ?it?s gone, too.?

    The woman did a double take at the impressive Fondor Community Cultural Center building and narrowed her eyes. ?Excuse me? What are you talking about??

    Badour hated it when they refused to understand. Good behavior or not, she did not tolerate ignorance. She smiled more broadly and tried to explain. ?The planet is destroyed after the shipyards. It?s a bit of an accident, but very beautiful.?* She patted her foot and began to worry that the Jedi was intentionally walking slow.

    ?What a horrid imagination! That?s hardly something to smile about,? the older woman frowned.

    Coolly, she turned and looked in the woman?s dark brown eyes. ?It?s not like it?s going to affect you,? she said slowly. ?Don?t worry you?ll be dead by the end of this year?the doctor didn?t notice the other growth. Your son Baxter?s children will die long before the planet; in fact they won?t outlive their parents. Your whole family will be but a memory before the Emperor even takes his throne.?

    Silently, the woman began to move away, but her eyes remained fixed on the child.

    ?Don?t worry, I won?t forget you.? She giggled as she waved good-bye.

    ---

    Clutching her bag of candies like a treasure, the small child skipped along beside him. Obi-Wan was relieved that she could be bought off with sweets and that she did not talk much. Quite frankly, he wondered what Elitrea meant when she described her as difficult. While it was apparent that the child was Force sensitive, he failed to note any malice in her. However, it did occur to him that perhaps spending the past five years with Anakin had desensitized him to the types of emotions Jedi considered dangerous or disruptive in the young. Obi-Wan likened Anakin?s presence in the Force to a supernova and acknowledged that at times it blinded him to some of the smaller disturbances. Regardless, the child was reasonably pleasant, if a bit over eager to run ahead and talk to strangers.

    The public dock where their Republic-class transport waited was busy for a late afternoon and Obi-Wan hoped that Anakin had put their name on the departure list with the air-traffic control center. The child made him edgy not because of what Elitrea suggested, but the simple fact he did not like children. He hoped their trip would be uneventful and short. Their schedule dictated that they had to be on Corellia in a week to provide return escort for a party of Mid-Rim senators who had been taking part in the Corellian Trade Summit. Obi-Wan always liked to be early.

    The child stopped outside of the hangar and waited. She was too small to reach the door code. It seemed to Obi-Wan that sometimes the Jedi Order forgot that they were dealing with children. Aside from what Elitrea had told him, he knew very little about what had happened. His and Anakin?s involvement with the
  17. Exeter Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Feb 2, 2005
    star 4
    Badour is a bit creepy, that's for sure. Then again, what child wouldn't be with that kind of presience?

    Oh, and thanks for the asterisk. I thought you made Fondor up :p
  18. Darth_Scroobius Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 1, 2005
    star 2
    Exeter Who's more psychotic - the psycho, or the psycho that corrects him? - The answer is... me[face_devil][face_skull][face_pumpkin]]-}. Mu-wa-ha-ha-ha-ha. I do shoot handguns as a hobby. And I've named mine, she's my baby. So, and I mean this in the most non-threatening way possible, don't mess with me.:p


    Badour doesn't seem so bad to me. Sure she says disturbing things, but her tone is so playful, and she's a little girl. She just seems especially precocious, with a hint of prescience, in a playful package;).

    Why do I find it so unsurprising that Anakin likes her? And I love the Perfect One nickname. Very Anakin-sounding.

    EDIT: Okay, I went back and re-read the top part, and I just want to clarify: I was only kidding. Except for the shooting handguns part. And the naming her (of course my gun is a she). And her being my baby. But the rest was just me kidding.
  19. oqidaun Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2005
    star 5
    Actually, I'm pretty OCD about this sort of thing. I've got about fifteen books by my desk, tech manuals out the wazoo, a couple of PDF files open, a map of the galaxy, short cuts to the official and unofficial encyclopedias... I used to be a rp canon-nazi, so my OCs tend to play by the "rules". Now if I could only find a "key" map for Greater Coruscant...



    Yeah, I know I'm a dork and I should be writing my dissertation instead of goofing around over here.
  20. oqidaun Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2005
    star 5
    Chapter Five:
    Do you think that you?ll be saved?


    In the dark room, he pressed the cool burnished steel against his forehead and squeezed his eyes shut.
    His finger hovered over the activation switch.

    A bead of sweat trickled down the bridge of his nose.
    His heart protested impotently in his chest.
    It was a dark thought.

    The jury knelt with him.
    In the darkness he could see them all.
    Each breath he took was stolen from the dead?from them.

    You have failed. The ******* of Tatooine is in the Temple. You have failed.
    You have failed. The ******* of Tatooine is in the Temple. You have failed.
    You have failed. The ******* of Tatooine is in the Temple. You have failed.
    The words burned in his mind like the fires of Shoda.

    Tears welled up in his eyes and he closed them tighter.
    His elbows ached and his hands shook.
    It was his only thought.

    ?I?m sorry.? The simple words escaped as he exhaled for the last time.

    He pressed his finger against the switch.
    The bright green blade lit up the dark room, but for a moment.


    Light years away, a child laughed.
    Apparently, the Galaxy was full of prophecies.

  21. Bale Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 9, 2005
    star 4
    Very creepy, but cool! You have interesting OC's and some great imagry. This is quite a treat to read and a welcome change of pace from the customary stories on the Saga Board. Great job! =D=
  22. Ani-maniac Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jul 5, 2005
    star 4
    :D

    I really liked this, and look forward to more.

    There will be more right? [face_worried]

    Please?[face_praying]

    Anyway, wonderful job!

    Ani-maniac
  23. oqidaun Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2005
    star 5
    Chapter Six:
    Of the gods and idols you have made...


    The orbital mirrors redirected and intensified the system?s distant sun making for a glorious summer morning?one of those rare mornings when Coruscant truly appeared to be the ?Crown Jewel of the Galaxy? just like the propagandists from the Municipal Tourism Board claimed. As the WeatherNet promised, the rain clouds dissipated at dawn leaving only puddles as evidence of the night?s violent storms. The reflection and refraction of the brightness off of polished duracrete and coated transparisteel bathed the upper levels of the city in brilliant white, everything seemed clean and new. At the center, the Jedi Temple gleamed as though its marble edifice had been meticulously scrubbed overnight. Unabashedly, the bright rays streamed into the High Council Chamber childishly taunting the somber mood of the two Masters.

    Nothing became clearer with daybreak.

    ?Most unforeseen was this.?

    Arms folded, Mace Windu leaned against the back of the chair usually occupied by Ki- Adi-Mundi and absently stared at the megalopolis below him. ?Master Gooli left for Fondor earlier and will counsel her former Padawan. I do not doubt that she will need assistance as she seeks to find peace at this time.? He turned from the window and revealed the sadness in his dark eyes, ?The boy?s trials were set for next month.?

    Yoda did not dwell on the death. ?Remember you, the origins of the child??

    ?Dezan??

    ?No, the girl.? He sat in his customary low chair, his chin resting against his tiny green fist.

    ?She came from Anaxes. Her family was reluctant to release her.?

    ?Meditated on this, I have. Know the child, I do.? Yoda folded his hands. ?An error, she was.?

    ?Force sensitive, but not capable?it happens.? Mace did not intend to sound quite as nonchalant as he did, but his thoughts remained with Elitrea.

    ?Yes and unfortunate, it is.?

    ?Yet, how do we explain her precognition??

    ?Explain it, I can not.?

    ?Nor, can I,? a new voice interjected.

    ?Master Poof,? Mace greeted the curious looking Quermian.

    His long necked swayed as he acknowledged the greeting. ?I thought Banner was over reacting and I counseled him to show patience above all things. I looked into the child?s records and there was no evidence of any precognitive ability.? Yarael Poof remained one of the Council?s most gifted precognitives and a keen manipulator of the persuasive elements of the Force.

    ?The most basic of exercises, she struggled with.? Yoda recalled the child?s slow process and persistent frustration.

    ?There is the possibility that the trauma of being removed from the Temple sparked a latent precognitive ability.? Mace looked to Poof.

    Wagging one of his long delicate fingers, Poof disagreed, ?This kind of ability, latent or otherwise, would not develop so rapidly as on a hyperspace jump between Coruscant and the Mid-Rim, Master Windu. From what Banner said, she was out of control, at times catatonic and at other times capable of being highly disruptive. Whatever social skills she was taught here, apparently failed to follow her.? He paused, realizing he was venting his own frustrations with the situation. ?While ability does often manifest itself in late childhood, it is always accompanied by early signs that identify such gifts. She had none of the signs and was adequately tested prior to her release. Banner?s reports were melodramatic to say the least and I admit I reluctantly accepted his opinions.?

    ?Of course, Banner Weesoik is not the most reputable judge of ability or character.?

    Yoda frowned thoughtfully, ?Perhaps not. However, Master Elitrea is. And failed we did, to respond.? An uncomfortable silence followed; rarely did Yoda admit his mistakes.

    ?Master Windu, where is the child now?? Poof inquired.

    ?With Obi-Wan and Anakin and they are probably close to arriving at Abregado-Rae.?

    The Quermian straightened his robes. ?What do they know??

    ?Little. Happenstance, it was, that they were available.? Yoda shrugged.

    ?Do you believe
  24. HandmaidenVeme Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 28, 2004
    star 4
    Wow, this story is dark, twisted, and very good. Keep up the great work!

    By the way, that picture you have on the first page scared the hell out of me! I "clicked for clarity" and:eek: .
  25. oqidaun Manager Emeritus

    Member Since:
    Jul 20, 2005
    star 5
    Thanks! I aim to be dark, twisted and very good. :D
    Glad you liked my "cover art".
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