Canderous and Cade's Crazy Cantina: a shiny new fanfiction social thread!

I have never seen the show, but I saw the South Park version of it. That was pretty good.

 

My first experience with it was coming into my friend's apartment to find a cheerleading coach complaining that she might not get enough endorsement deals to buy a hovercraft. I sat down, transfixed by that idea, and kept coming back every week.

 

I would' ve just deleted the hate mail and block them. They' re not worthy for me even to worry about it. I would be OK, because life taught me to be OK with many things, and not to worry about something little.
Also, anyone has a good guide of how to get over one' s ex? This is driving me crazy for like... more than 1, 5 years. I need to do something to stop it! Only please, no these pointless " deal with the hate phase" , " tell yourself he' s not the one for you" , and " time is the best healer" . I never had any hate phase! I don' t hate him! Even now! It' s myself who I hate for acting so weak! I hate being weak... I always tried to destroy any sign of weakness in me, but this... it crushes all my strength and willpower! The only thing that makes me go on is my determination not to be weak, or at least not to show weakness! He' s not for me? Goddamn it, in my eyes he IS right for me! In my eyes his flaws are not flaws... because my mind makes him look PERFECT in my eyes! I' m ready to accept anything in him, to tolerate anything in him! I will never say, or even think anything bad of him, because I don' t see him like that! And if time is the best healer, then why does it go on for 1, 5 years while other girls of my age would handle this in... like... a week! Sometimes I wish I could be like them... That would' ve been less painful...

 

If you would delete the hate mail and block the sender, then what's stopping the recipient of your hate mail from doing the exact same thing? If the trolling becomes a cyber-attack, as per your initial proposal, then legal action could be taken on the part of the sender. This is not something that you want to risk, as the consequences could be dire.

Doing this "just for fun" could have ramifications later in life that could seriously impact you. If you launch a cyber-attack and they trace it back to you and pursue legal action, this would be on your record. This would impact your finding or even keeping a job. If I were you, I would put some serious consideration into what you have planned, and think about the possible consequences of your actions.

As for getting over your ex? I hear distraction is a great method. Do things, go places, hang out with friends, do everything to keep from crawling back into your head and thinking about your ex. Also, there is a reason he's your ex. Things simply don't work out. You need to realize that. If you dumped him, think back as to why. There's a reason for a breakup, and you need to find out what it is and reflect on that. Then, learn from it and move on.

 

And now for something completely different: a man with an mp3 player up his nose...

 

I tried to do distraction many times. It helps, but only temporarily! At first, it helps, but with time, this depression crushes even my liking to what I do! Besides, I don' t like hanging out with big groups of people, I' m an introvert, so I have to seek more quiet business for myself. That' s the reason I started a new fanfic and decided to put all the pain on the main character.
Also, I didn' t dump him! I couldn' t do this just like that " I no longer love you, because you' re not perfect. " . That never happened to me! The only reason it didn' t work out is because I saw he likes someone else more than me, so I decided to step aside and sacrifice my own peace just so they could be happy. I understood he loves another one, and if I fight, the both will get hurt. I don' t want that.

 

Hey guys, sorry I haven't been on and I'm sorry I have nothing constructive to add to the conversation that has yet to be said.

But I need some help. I am going to a funeral in the next few days (I don't want to go into detail) so I decided to die my once blue hair back to brown. It turned out pretty much black (which is better than blue, but not what I wanted). Do you guys know of any ways to fade hair dye quickly? I don't want to use any chemicals or dye it again because my hair was fried from the blue, let alone this. I know washing it enough times will do the trick, but I don't have time for that. I've read that dish soap and vinegar also work, but has anyone tried them?

 

Lemon juice supposedly also works. Chamomile tea lightens hair. I have done that one, and it worked, but that was when I was dyeing my hair with henna. Try leaving it in your hair overnight and see what happens, I guess? I don't know what vinegar will do to dyed hair. I use it on my hair sometimes because it's actually good for my scalp when it gets too greasy, but that's just conditioning, not anti-dye. Still, no harm in trying that one, I don't think.

Baking soda also works for washing, and it's way less aggressive on hair than shampoo or dish soap. So that might be an idea if you want to wash your hair without damaging it with tons of shampoo - just boil some water, dissolve the baking soda in it (it'll fizz) and then dilute it with cold water until it's a good temperature. You can either just rinse your hair with it or mix in some shampoo to get suds, which you won't have otherwise.

You can also try dyeing over it with henna - henna doesn't damage hair, it's actually good for it. If you just use pure henna that should give a reddish/brown cast to black hair, and it shouldn't react with the dye. But you'll want to be careful to use pure henna, also called body or body-art quality. Here's some tips about that: http://ask.metafilter.com/61318/Is-it-a-good-idea-to-use-henna-on-chemicallydyed-hair

That's all I got. Sorry I can't say anything concrete, I've never dyed my hair so I've no first-hand experience with it.

 

Sorry you have to go to a funeral Briannakin I've never tried it but I've heard if you mix dandruff shampoo and baking soda and wash your hair several time it will pull out color. I've never done it so I don't know but I've heard people talk about doing it. I have also herd the dish soap and vinegar but haven't tried that either. Sorry!

Master Elaine Nega - 1st off a hate mail campaign is never a good idea. That group/company is going to continue to do what they want to do and may even feed off hate mail they get. A lot of times it just spurs people on... or they completely ignore it as others have said.
2nd I know you said you didn't want to hear about how it takes time, but it does. I was with someone for 9 years and he broke it off a month before we were to get married, it took me a long time to get over it, about 2 and a half years. Not everyone is the same, those girls who get over people quickly are not you and you need to just give yourself the time you need. If you still like him and you were the one who broke it off, tell him, see what he says. If he doesn't want to get back with you then do your best to move on. I know it doesn't always seem like it, but there are plenty of people out there. I also recommend finding someone you can talk to in person, sometimes just talking about it a lot helps you to let it go.

 

Regarding how to get over someone, all I can say is, you need to accept it. If he likes someone else, then he's obviously not the one for you. If you want to be loved and respected, he's not the one for you. You need to accept that, really accept it. Maybe try to get angry at him? Anger tends to help. You don't have to actually yell at him or express the anger towards him in any way, just feel it.

You need to get some distance and perspective here. If he likes someone else more than you, well, he's not worthy of you then. You need to accept that and let it go. Save your affection and love for someone who'll love you back, and remember that you're worthy of that, that you deserve that.

 

Oh, and yeah, absolutely what mavjade said... different people react differently. Breakups tend to leave me feeling relieved and happy. So yeah. Don't compare yourself to others. Some people jump from relationship to relationship, but that's not necessarily better, and if you're not the type to do that then accept that. Accept yourself and give yourself the time you need to get over it. Don't force it, don't obsess over it, just accept it and work with it.

 

Master Elaine Nega: I'm still going to advise against it. You should always treat others how you would like to be treated because you never know when it'll come back. To quote Bill and Ted: be excellent to each other.

Oh, and breaking up sucks. I have no advice but the last two panels of this comic might help: http://doctorcatmd.com/2013-05-24/ask-doctor-cat He's a cat and also a doctor, so his advice is legit.

 

Thanks for the hair suggestions guys. I tried the dandruff shampoo and baking powder mix and it worked quite well. It's still not as light as what I was going for, and the ends are still quite dark, but if I put it in a clip, it's not all that bad. It's my grandfather's funeral. Last week we found out he had cancer, the doctors gave him 2 years but he lived a week. I know he wouldn't have cared about my blue hair, but it's my grandmother and aunt that I fear.

Break ups and deaths suck. You never know how you will react to them. I thought I was going to be devastated when my grandfather died, but I'm doing quite well (I say that now, wait till I get off the plane on Thursday, I may be a blubbering mess). Time does help with wounds, but it's never a cure-all. In the end you have to think out your emotions, figure out the root of them and deal with the issue.

 

I don' t think talking would help. He is now happy with the one to whom I let him go, and I set all possible contacts to minimum when this happened. Don' t think he remembers me after so much time... Another proof teenage crushes do no good... Besides, I didn' t do much... I just stepped aside and let him solve the situation himself out of my convictions and not wanting to do anything bad.

I talked to some of my best friends with whom I thought I could share this. The one thinks I should' ve started fighting over him, and the other considers my ex a stupid and weak - minded doormat. What should I do then? They' re also different, and have different perceptions of the problem.

The thing is that I can' t get angry at him. I don' t even remember ever getting angry at him. If the business was coming to an argue, I just was forgetting about my own opinion, and trying to cool down the conflict before it even started. I tolerated everything in sake of relationship.

Thanks, that' s funny, and I definately can arrange that.

 

Master Elaine Nega If you continuously think about this man your question shouldn't be 'how do I get over an exe' it should be 'how do I get rid of obsessive thoughts?'

I have OCD and I obsess about things sometimes. I read a book that recommended something called snap therapy. You put a thick rubber band around your wrist and every time you have your obsessive thought you stretch that rubber band and let it snap your wrist...hard! You keep doing it until your brain starts associating that thought with pain and miraculously it tries to stop you from thinking those thoughts. I know it sounds way too simple to work, but it did for me. It may take days or week and you are going to have a very sore wrist, but it is like training an animal using negative reenforcement. In this case, you are the one being trained.

Here is the book I read: http://www.amazon.com/Snap-Out-Of-Herbert-Cohen/dp/0871318962

You really don't need to read the book or get their special band, a fat rubber band will do and I pretty much summed up the book in a paragraph.

 

There's your mistake. Don't do that. I mean it, don't EVER do that. Someone who loves you doesn't require you to give up your own preferences, opinions, etc, they don't want you to change or stifle aspects of yourself or your personality, and they don't hold it against you if you have the occasional fight. The occasional fight/argument in a relationship is healthy - as long as you make up afterwards. It's a good thing, not something to be avoided. It's a matter of respect. And that and trust are the two most important things in any relationship. Without those, there's no point.

And look. If this guy just accepted it when you broke up with him, didn't try to change your mind, didn't argue, hasn't tried to get you back, then he just isn't worth it. Where's the evidence that he cares about you? So far, I'm not seeing any. You stepped aside and let him work it out? Well, clearly, he's worked it out, and he doesn't care enough about you to try and get back with you. That means he's not worth it, plain and simple.

You deserve better than that. You deserve someone who likes you more than every other girl, who argues with you because he respects your opinion, who respects you for disagreeing with him and loves you regardless, and who tries to change your mind if you suggest breaking up. Don't ever settle for less than that. That's my advice.

 

Never ever settle. You deserve someone who puts you first. Anything less isn't worth it.

 

Coincidently I just had this discussion last month with my teenage son who now is interested in a girl. I told him teenage love is usually the most intense love of all and the inevitable break up will be devastating. He will have tons of hormones raging through his body and the parts of his brain that would help him cope with a break up are not fully developed yet.

I told him when the relationship ends (and most young relationships do) he will feel like his world has ended, he will experience emotional pain worst than ever before. I will try to comfort him but he will cry out that I don't understand...that I'll never understand what he's going through...even though I went through it as a teen...and about 99% of all adults went through it as a teen.

I told him, "I'm telling you this now, when you are not hormonally insane and depressed. You will get through the heartbreak, just like everybody else. Just remember what I am telling you now, so when the time comes you will know I understand."

I know, that is the most depressing pep talk a mom can give a son.

 

Same talk I've had with my own teenage son. It breaks my heart to even imagine my little boy (who's nearing 15) with his first broken heart.

 

Well, I'm the last person to ask for relationship advice. I think I still like this guy from highschool. We admitted we liked each other, we weren't going out really, weren't boyfriend and girlfriend (one mistake I hate that I made) , but one day he tells me that it won't work because he's in public highschool and i"m homeschooled so it would never work. I think I tried arguing to the contrary, but I have a feeling I eventually let it go. In the end, I realize I never tried hard enough to keep our relationship, makes me angry at myself. Sometimes I find myself thinking of him, he's still a good friend to me. We don't talk that often but when we do it feels like back when I was in highschool and we were both in the same youth group.

He has a girlfriend which for me it sucks because sometimes I think of maybe trying again, but I'm not sure he feels the same way anymore. Well, now I'm depressed lol Then there's this other guy, that I think I currently like named James, but that's also another one that I think is a dead end since he's never showed interest in. I've never had a boyfriend, as hard as that is to believe, alot of people around me are kind of stunned by that. I've just never seen that as that important.

 

My first boyfriend tried to Friend me on Facebook last year. I totally ignored him despite his pleas for me to explain why I won't talk to him. Hmmm Could it be he just got out of jail after serving twenty years for attempted murder? My other guy BFF died. So I don't have any exe's haunting me.

 

Take it from this divorced woman (who is now engaged to the man of her dreams): SHE IS RIGHT. DO NOT SETTLE. NEVER EVER SETTLE. BEING ALONE IS BETTER THAN BEING IN A MISERABLE RELATIONSHIP.

Yes, that needed caps.

 

I have a good relationship with my exes. I'm not close with either of them, but we're friends. They're really nice guys. Apparently that's weird, and most people tend to assume when I mention "my ex" that I hate or at least dislike him, and I usually have to explain that actually, he's lovely.

But yes: being single is a thousand times better than giving up your freedom or your dreams or your self just for the sake of being with someone who can't even respect and accept who you are. Being alone is better than being in bad company.

People put WAY too much emphasis on this stuff. I remember the huge pressure to get a boyfriend when I was in school. I didn't want one, certainly not any of the guys there, but everyone kind of expects you to want one. I'm not too fussed about it either. If I meet someone I like, sure. But my world doesn't revolve around it, and I don't think it ought to. People just tend to assume that everyone wants the Disney fairytale thing, and that just isn't for everyone. It's like college. Some love it, some hate it, some are indifferent, but nowadays it's kind of expected of everyone and that kind of sucks.

 

I went to the specialist today recommended by the concussion clinic. He did a lot of tests of memory, concentration, balance, strength, vision, etc. and concluded that I need to be working part time for a couple of weeks. My boss is agreeing to it starting tomorrow, since I called her from the lobby of the doctor's office. He'll reevaluate me on the 29th.

Then I went to my nephew's 4th birthday party. While there, my sister-in-law mentioned teaching to be nice to Mommy when she has a baby in her tummy. She claims she told me last month, but hasn't returned my calls in 2 months. I gave her a no-hard-feelings hug and let my brother know that this is the sort of thing you mention when you talk to your sister last week.