-Chaos- One-poster, angst, J/K and slight J/J, future

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction Stories--Classic JC Board (Reply-Only)' started by Jaina_Solo_Durron, Mar 15, 2003.

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  1. Jaina_Solo_Durron Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 3, 2002
    star 4
    Author: Jaina_Solo_Durron (aka JSD)

    Era: Future (Post-NJO), perhaps slightly AU

    Spoilers: NJO up to and including SbS

    Other: very very slight implied J/J and outright J/K, very very angsty?

    Well, I needed a place to put my 1000th post, so I decided to finally write something instead of just reading and lurking...Thanks VERY VERY VERY much to the_jedi_princess for betaing this on VERY VERY short notice...luv ya sis! Go read her fics: Papa Don't Preach and the Eternity Series: War of the Heart, If Tomorrow Never Comes, Through the Fires of Hell and Live to Die Another Day, and lots more that you can find in her profile...enjoy!

    Here it is!


    Chaos

    Some say a war is won by the stronger and lost by the weaker. But how can a victory involve the loss of everything you hold dear?

    We?ve lost so much. Friends, relatives, complete strangers who did nothing more than try to protect the ones they loved?the ones we loved. Loved. That very word implies that the love no longer exists, for those that we cared for are gone.

    And indeed, they are. My own brothers, my father?s closest friend, my boyfriend, my husband, my unborn child, my parents, my aunt and uncle, my cousin?all taken before their time.

    Yet I have the blood of countless others on my hands. Warriors, shapers, Peace Brigaders?even a Warmaster. The last battle was not a military battle as the sims show it, but all-out slaughter. How many were killed is still unknown. All we know is that our foe was defeated ? if you can call it that. Utterly quashed is more likely the correct term for such gruesome devastation.

    Even with the destruction of the Vong, however, this galaxy is not at peace?indeed, it probably will not be peaceful for a long, long time. We have grown up with wars raging around us. Accustomed as we are to it, people feel?incomplete if they are not in the deadly heat of the battle?I know I do. War is not glorious, it is murder. And those who partake of war often become murderers.

    Civil wars on various scattered worlds tax the resources of the already battered and beaten New Republic military. The Jedi, once the heroes and peacekeepers of the galaxy are now little more than a handful of hated missionaries.

    The government is virtually nonexistent, those that were part of it having been eliminated long ago?my mother was among them. What is left ? a few, struggling individuals ? ineffectually attempt to restore some semblance of order.

    They say love heals all. But is there enough love? Has there ever been enough love to heal the great and bloody wounds, the open, reeking sores this and other wars have inflicted upon the galaxy?

    I have loved many, and lost many. Millions, no, billions of others have done the same. Is it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all? After the heartbreak that comes of loss, one must reconsider?


    My name is Jaina Solo-Durron.

    This is my last will and testament.

    With these words, I say goodbye to the galaxy that was once my home.

    And welcome the chaos.


    Well, what do you think? Too angsty? Too negative?

    And yes, I was a little depressed when I wrote this.

    -JSD
    />/>
  2. the_jedi_princess Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Apr 26, 2002
    star 4
    Once again, let me say how great this is, and what? No thanks to your beta? :p
  3. Jaina_Solo_Durron Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 3, 2002
    star 4
    Sorry bout that....gonna add it now!

    Thanks again, TJP....t'was muchly appreciated!

    -JSD
  4. Jaina_Solo_Durron Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 3, 2002
    star 4
    Upping my own fic cos it's slipped to pg 2

    -JSD
  5. duskwings Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 10, 2003
    star 3
    :_| Oh my god . . . that's so sad! :_| But I suppose that's war. Death and pain and destruction. :(

    Beautifully written, although it's depressing.
  6. Hail_Jaina Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Nov 30, 2002
    star 2
    great job JSD!!!!!!! I am very impressed!!!!
    Write more please!!!
  7. Jaina_Solo_Durron Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 3, 2002
    star 4
    I can't find this on the board...UP!

    -JSD
  8. Master_Jaina1011 Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    May 20, 2002
    star 4
    that was great JSD!!! very angsty . . . very well thought out. Not too negative . . . sounds like a movie voice over actually . . . which is really really really good.

    Have I made my point yet?
  9. Jaina_Solo_Durron Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 3, 2002
    star 4
    sure you have M_J1011...thanks for all the positive comments guys...I'm thinking of writing a Wes/OC fic, but i need to know what Wes's ummm...preference, shall we say, is....PM me with your opinion...

    where is everyone?

    -JSD
  10. Jaina_Solo_Durron Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 3, 2002
    star 4
    Am I the only one posting on my thread? UP, dangit!

    -JSD
  11. Deneveon Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jun 6, 2002
    star 4
    Whoa.

    Powerful start, JSD! :D And no, you're not the only one posting on your thread... it's just that my kriffing computer won't load the JC pages!! I dunno why... though anyhoo, more soon? I hope?

    Oh yes, I noticed in your title... "slight J/J"... oooo boy... not a good thing...

    --Den
  12. Jaina_Solo_Durron Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 3, 2002
    star 4
    Deneveon: I know...but he's dead now [face_devil] ... unfortunately, so is kyp :_|

    I've written another one-poster, called It's Probably Me. It's over on the Beyond the Saga board. It's a K/J songfic that took me all of an hour to write...


    thank you all for reading!

    -JSD
  13. TKeira_Lea Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 10, 2002
    star 5
    JSD I read this and loved it. Very angsty and yes I can tell you were depressed, but it definitely worked for you.

    Hope you feel better and bravo!
  14. NarundiJedi Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Oct 8, 2001
    star 6
    Wow, that was quite an unhappy ending! You could almost hear the theme from "Requiem For a Dream" playing in the background! :p

    Even though I hated that movie for its depressing qualities, I sometimes wish that Star Wars stories would end like this, just for a change of pace. Not everybody can always have a happy ending. My crazy relatives are apparently testament to that!

    Speaking of which, I got to see them in Guardiagrele, Italy this week! :D The ones that didn't kill themselves, that is. ;)

    Jae Angel
  15. Jaina_Solo_Durron Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 3, 2002
    star 4
    Hi all!

    TKeira_Lea: Thank you very much, and yes, I did feel better after writing it...much better...better enough to shove snow down my host sister's jacket [face_devil] ...muahaha

    NarundiJedi: 'Requiem for a Dream'? I should get that out and see it...you've got crazy relatives too? In my family, I am the crazy relative ... I'm the only one who knows how to use chopsticks...and since eating non-sticky rice with chopsticks is eminently difficult, my cousins (all eighteen of them, all older than me) idolise or threaten me...My extended family live in India, so I only see them every couple of years or so...

    Happy Belated St Patrick's Day to you all...and thanks for reading!

    -JSD
  16. Jaina_Solo_Durron Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 3, 2002
    star 4
    UP! where is this, anyway?

    -JSD
  17. Eowyn_Jade Force Ghost

    Member Since:
    Jan 14, 2003
    star 4
    very touching :_|

    Loved it ^_^

    EJ
  18. Jaina_Solo_Durron Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 3, 2002
    star 4
    Thanks, Eowyn_Jade...UP!

    -JSD
  19. Jaina_Solo_Durron Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 3, 2002
    star 4
    Shamelessly UPping my own fic!

    -JSD
  20. Lt_Jaina_Solo Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    May 27, 2002
    star 5
    interesting beginning...is there going to be more of this?
  21. Jaina_Solo_Durron Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jul 3, 2002
    star 4
  22. JainaDurron Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 8, 2002
    star 4
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