Before - Legends ---CharmisDrabbles... ---: Week 5!!!-------Qui-Gon, Dooku, Xanatos, Obi, Maul

This looked like far too much fun to pass up. I hope I can keep up.

First set is in second person, but I'll cheat and tell you. You are Qui-Gon.
-*-



1. beginnings

He isn?t smiling, but his honey-brown eyes are shot through with the happy light of play, and the curves of his shoulders are relaxed. He tips his head forward, only just, so that the dark ponytail swings forward. The burst of lightsaber ignition coaxes a little half-smile from the lips, a predatory quirk, and there it is: the classic Makashi salute. Tight and quick, the blade flashes, and then sweeps down to the side with decided relish. A pause before attack, as if an honorary nod to elegance itself.

Master Dooku is going to kill you, but it?ll be fun.


2. middles

You?ve been telling him to tie up his hair for the last six months, and he never listens, anymore then when you tell him to stop ripping off pieces of the sparring room to Force-throw at you in the middle of matches. He routinely mocks gravity, dark blue eyes all laughter. He won?t pick a form; rather playing between all of them, like a child who wishes to possess all the toys.

And that?s what makes you always smile, and forgive, and look the other way. Because Xanatos is amusing. Because Xanatos is more of your friend than your Padawan.

3. ends

You think everything must be fading out because he?s usually so predictable during battle, so steady. Now his form is brightly honest, filled with so much of himself, and you want to tell him that this is what you were always speaking of in the lessons. He doesn?t hesitate. He strikes. He?s the moment.

The Sith topples, split at the middle from your fallen blade. It looks right pulsing in his hands, trembling as they are.

And he runs back to you, as he always has. But you can?t be here anymore.

?Obi-Wan?? Is that your voice? ?It?s too late.?

4. first

Now he is brilliant as he ever was; a sun star with too much fire or feeling. And how he has grown! He is finally that thing which you had foreseen, finally completed. He does not merely touch the Force, he channels it, pouring out strength, wielding lava flow. How could the Council have ever doubted? He is the prophecy. He is the hope where your strength had failed.

And as you wrap ghostly arms around the dying youngling, easing the child into death, you realize your passionate, completed Chosen One is the first of a new era of Sith.

5. last

Yellow sands are drifting here; but so are you, spliced in formless eternity. You won?t know what it?s like to grow old; can?t remember how it feels to be tired. You touch his exhaustion though: the tattered emptiness in gentle sighs. Sometimes you feel like only reflective water to him, an illusion of this arid world.

But he is the last, and alone, and yours. You won?t leave him. That you know as strongly as the memory of a heartbeat.

Obi-Wan glances up, halfway through teatime with no one. The surface of the liquid ripples. He smiles. ?Thank you, Qui-Gon.?


-*-

 

Woot, first reply! *dances*
I loved these, especially Beginnings and Last.

Master Dooku is going to kill you, but it?ll be fun.
That seems very much in-character...I always loved how you write Qui and Dooku, and even in a drabble, your style shows through brilliantly.

But he is the last, and alone, and yours. You won?t leave him. That you know as strongly as the memory of a heartbeat.
Awww...
Great job, I look forward to more of these!
Cheers!

 

Charms!! So very glad you decided to get on board with these! See, aren't they fun? You've done such a good job! YOu really can pack a punch in 100 words! Wow I don't know which is my favorite! I'll just pick out my favorite lines...since I don't have a particular favorite drabble, they're all wonderful!


Master Dooku is going to kill you, but it?ll be fun. Hahahhaha, that line struck me as most amusing

And that?s what makes you always smile, and forgive, and look the other way. Because Xanatos is amusing. Because Xanatos is more of your friend than your Padawan.
Awwwwww, that one's terribly heartbreaking!



And as you wrap ghostly arms around the dying youngling, easing the child into death, you realize your passionate, completed Chosen One is the first of a new era of Sith.
Wow what brilliant imagery that is there! Superb work, never thought of Qui-Gon being there for the younglings easing the pain of death. Nice!



Excellent work again, m'dear!

 

Love these! Especially the middles and ends ones.

And that?s what makes you always smile, and forgive, and look the other way. Because Xanatos is amusing. Because Xanatos is more of your friend than your Padawan.

Brilliantly said.

And he runs back to you, as he always has. But you can?t be here anymore.
Oh, that so defines their relationship. Wonderful, wonderful!!!

 

Wow, that was awesome! The pattern of the titles and how it all fit--magnificent!

 

Oh these are so lovely. *sigh* They read to me like tiny precious, precious stones: so poetic and pretty and lovely. *clasps hands together in delighted awe* I'm so glad to read something new from you.

 

Well done!! Loooved them!

Poor Qui that one where he dies is so sad!

Great work!

 

Oh, Jess, they hurt. The one with Anakin especially, because everything's already lost there, and he sounds so proud of him almost, except... then it's then.

In the last one, I like the emphasis on liquid in such a dry setting (reflective water, the cup when Obi-Wan's hand shakes, or there's a breeze of air or ghost-whose-name-apparently-means-breath), and on what Qui-Gon does and doesn't remember and what he never knew firsthand, and I wonder if Qui-Gon remembers how important "just reflective water" might be in a desert.

 

Jess... that was amazing. Wonderful, Heartbreaking. I'm running out of adjectives here. You've brought Qui-Gon to life. In every way it is possible to bring a character to life. And his relationship with Obi-Wan. Every piece was a work of art. And Xan. Perhaps I think the Anakin one is the greatest. It is perfect.

 

Wow! I loved these, especially Obi-Wan's

Edit: I'm hoping you'll continue your vigs of the female jedi of SW. Adored Underwater Thing.

 

Wonderfully written. I had to read them all a couple of times just to really get the impact of each word and emotion! Well done.

 

These are fantastic... very well done

I'd ask also if u update with more, please add me to ur pm list

 

Wow, thanks for such a great response!

Star: Ack, you're too kind to me! I couldn't help but slip a little Qui-Gon and Dooku in there, if only a little. I do love the boys inordinately. And *g* I'm glad to have a recognizable style. That makes me happy. Thanks for the review!

Laurie: Eee. *swishy bow* What a kind review!^^ I'm glad I got into them too, they're fun thingies...

With the younglings, I think it was possibly for my own feeling better. The poor things, they had to have something with them.

dianethx: Aw, thank you! I'm glad you liked them! I confess, I haven't done a lot of Xanatos and Qui stuff, but it's something I'd like to explore.

Luminara_Kenobi: Thank you! I agonized quite a bit over how I was going to theme them, I'm glad it all came out right.

leia_naberrie: You always are so sweet, m'dear! It has been a while, hasn't it? Silly coursework.

Kyn: Aw, thank you. I know, I haven't ever been able to bring myself to write a death!Qui story, but I thought it wouldn't count, being a drabble...

Pekay: I have to say, I couldn't help but think of Anakin singing, writing the bit with the Temple...

I don't think Qui-Gon quite appreciates the water thing, yet.

Princess: Ahhh. *hug* You are a dear, you know? Second person was surprisingly good with Qui-Gon. I think I think about him too much.

honour: Okay, and my day is made, because I didn't think there was anyone out there who remembered/cared about my Jedi Ladies. You are awesome. I'm definitely still working on them, I think I may have Komari Vosa up next (although, I dunno, cos I wanted to do something a little happier) ....so... yes. Thank you.

Leona: Thank you, ma'am. ^_^ I'm notoriously terrible at keeping up PM lists, but I shall try my hardest! I so much appreciate the review!

Araxie: Wow, thank you!

Veloz: Thankie! Consider yourself PM listed.

 

Aaaaah, they are very nice, different eras of Qui-Gon. I liked the last two, 'ghostly' Qui-Gons, especially where Qui-Gon is still with Obi-Wan at the end.

 

ardavenport: Why, thank you! Qui-Gon was always my first love, but he's by no means my specialty, so I'm encouraged to hear that he came out okay. I appreciate the review!
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Week two, kiddos! Themeish thing for this week is meetings. A lot of these really wanted to be big fics, too, so you might see them again sometime in the future, depending. Oh, and watch out for Jocasta, she swears, the pirate!

Also, gah, I need to decide on a name for these.

~*~


6. hours
It took Yoda hours to finally convince Dooku that he was not a terrifying cellartroll, and far longer to lure him out of hiding. The small boy?s eyes were streaming and copper-bright; peering out from under the transport ship?s cot with acute anguish. For all his potential, he was now as insubstantial and lost as a little dustpuff.

It was then that he finally gave in to sobbing; gulping and choking at first, as if the tears alone were frightening, and then steadier, quietly, as the horror sunk in.

Even with his special powers, his parents still didn?t want him.


7. days
It took Qui-Gon three days to start trusting him.

Dooku knew this precisely, because three days into training, in a moment?s slip of balance, he found the boy?s hand firmly clutching his own.

It wasn?t much. But stars, he had done it so naturally, so instinctively, and what was this boy trusting him for?--he was only twenty-two, and didn?t know anything at all about being a Jedi Master or keeping a child alive!

Dooku had held on tightly, fighting a mild wave of panic, and vowed to never let his new apprentice guess how particularly terrifying the thought was.


8. weeks
?You weren?t going to say hello, were you? After all these weeks??

The voice was cultured, clipped, familiar and profoundly hurt. Dooku glanced from his datareader, unnerved to find Jocasta Nu?s porcelain face hovering angrily over his shoulder.

She ?had grown; a queen of pale and gold now, even towering over him. Her arms were crossed; her lightsaber just visible, clipped like a little silver charm on the circlet of her waist.

?Jo! --I wanted to see you, only??

?Go--? She whirled. "--to hell."

He blinked, incredulous. ?What??

?And tell your ridiculous Padawan to quit running in the Archive!?


9. months
?Hello, again.? Qui-Gon hadn?t really been planning to speak. Master Dooku certainly hadn?t spoken to him in the months since he had been Knighted.

But a curious look came into the Master eyes: bright, almost warm. Intense. "Padawan!"

Qui-Gon blinked at Dooku?s reflexive slip of tongue, his words suddenly colliding into a pile in his chest, leaving him strangely mute. He had missed him. After all the time he?d spent convincing himself that he hadn't, the realization was warming.

And he smiled, because the exchange was far too awkward for Dooku not to have missed him just a little, too.


10. years
Years had curved her body, cupped her with hands of womanhood, until her shape was so different, Qui-Gon hardly recognized his little playmate. There was ruby fullness to her quirking lips now, sharpness in the green-gold of her eyes that swayed him. He felt abruptly awkward, deer-like in sudden awareness of the length of his limbs, the hot sun on his broadened shoulders.

?Stars and planets, is it Qui-Gon Jinn??

Warmth arched up his spine. ?Tahl!?

He tipped, delirious with the joy of her, caught on her Force-signature. Their bodies met with laughter, a hug, a beautiful crash.

~*~

 

Oi!!! A lil Dooku!! *warm fuzzies* how cute!!

Great work! Loved the timeline there Jo's comment and then Qui's Knighting Loved that bit too both did miss each other somewhat.

Well done!

 

Hurrah, there's more!
Once again, I loved these. All were superb, as usual, but I think 'Months' was my favorite. It's that sweet sort of awkwardness that shows that both were truly missed...

Some other things that stood out in particular:

For all his potential, he was now as insubstantial and lost as a little dustpuff.
Aww...dustpuff Dooku! *squee*

Even with his special powers, his parents still didn?t want him.
*bites lip* Poor little thing...*gives li'l Dook a hug*

Dooku had held on tightly, fighting a mild wave of panic, and vowed to never let his new apprentice guess how particularly terrifying the thought was.
Y'know, for some reason, Dooku's paranoia is particularly endearing, here. *grins*

?Go--? She whirled. "--to hell."
Ooh, burn.

He tipped, delirious with the joy of her, caught on her Force-signature. Their bodies met with laughter, a hug, a beautiful crash.
That last line -- perfect.

May I ask to be PM-listed? I love these things! You're doin' a great job, Charm. keep up the good work!

 

Even with his special powers, his parents still didn?t want him.


Awwwwwww poor Dook! He needs a big hug, methinks.



?Jo! --I wanted to see you, only??

?Go--? She whirled. "--to hell."

He blinked, incredulous. ?What??

?And tell your ridiculous Padawan to quit running in the Archive!?



LOL Poor Dooku he's just not having it easy is he?



Qui-Gon blinked at Dooku?s reflexive slip of tongue, his words suddenly colliding into a pile in his chest, leaving him strangely mute. He had missed him. After all the time he?d spent convincing himself that he hadn't, the realization was warming.


Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww That's so sweet!



?Stars and planets, is it Qui-Gon Jinn??

Warmth arched up his spine. ?Tahl!?

He tipped, delirious with the joy of her, caught on her Force-signature. Their bodies met with laughter, a hug, a beautiful crash.




Awwww loved that last line particularly!


Excellent job on all of these, Charms m'dear!

 

Beautiful!

10. years
Years had curved her body, cupped her with hands of womanhood, until her shape was so different, Qui-Gon hardly recognized his little playmate. There was ruby fullness to her quirking lips now, sharpness in the green-gold of her eyes that swayed him. He felt abruptly awkward, deer-like in sudden awareness of the length of his limbs, the hot sun on his broadened shoulders.

?Stars and planets, is it Qui-Gon Jinn??

Warmth arched up his spine. ?Tahl!?

He tipped, delirious with the joy of her, caught on her Force-signature. Their bodies met with laughter, a hug, a beautiful crash.

 

Oooh these were great!

I particularly couldnt help but laugh my butt off at the Jocasta/Dooku one ...priceless!

 

Eeee!

I must say, I like 'Days' best. But you also handled Jocasta excellently. There's something about Dooku as a very young Master...it's a dynamic I really like.

 

Their bodies met with laughter, a hug, a beautiful crash.

Crash? Is that what they call it nowadays?

Needless to say, I love "Weeks" and Jocasta swearing. Hehe.

I love "hours" and the thought of Yoda being a cellar troll is hilarous!

"days" and "months" were lovely bookends to Qui/Dooku.

So yes, I strongly encourage you to feed the bunnies and write full-length stories for all of them.

Feed the Bunnies! Feed the Bunnies! Feed the Bunnies! Feed the Bunnies! Feed the Bunnies!

 

I should be posting drabbles today, but instead I have author replies, because I fail at everything. *shakes head*

Kynstar: Thank you! It was...unbelievably hard to get it all in order, actually. *G* I don't do coherent timelines well. Also: Little Dook is great fun to write. Just putting that out there. *hugs* I appreciate the review, babe!

Star! *g* Of course you may be PM listed! I'm actually trying to keep one for this story, and I'd be honored to have you on it. Thanks for the sweet comments--dustpuff!Dook--you know, I couldn't resist. It was too pretty a mental image.

This comment ---> Ooh, burn. --made me literally crack up laughing. Out loud. The professor whose class I was reading it in (*g* working very hard at the computer, let me assure you) thought I had gone mad.

Healer_Leona: Thank you so much, Leona! I really appreciate the comments!

Laurie: *evil grins* Dooku plus Jo equals Dooku never wins. Womenfolk are such trouble!

Madame VadieLVR64: Posting Years was especially fun for me, because I get to see who the closet Qui/Tahl people are. Thank you for taking the time to review, I do really appreciate it.

Veloz: Stormy Jocasta and Dooku is a lot of fun. As much as I'd like to write something mushy with them, (I am a fluffy musher at heart) whenever I write them together, they end up getting into a spat. Often violence happens.

sabarte: It's paricularly neat to see an author one admires reviewing. Thank you much! --I agree, I really have come to prefer young, bewildered Master Dooku over how I previously wrote him. And it certainly makes it more interesting when Qui-Gon hits that more rebellious age, and starts to realize he's not really that much older than him at all. And about my Jocasta, I appreciate it. I'm inordinately fond of writing her.

Leia, you imp! Crash? Is that what they call it nowadays? ---ahh, you crack me up! You know, when I was first writing that, I reworded it like three times for that purpose. I mean... uh, I am appalled. So appalled.

Bunnies!--well, I'm doing a Dooku/Jocasta thing, actually, now. Which is kind of why I don't have drabbles this week yet. I'm hoping it will inspire this other Dook and Jo writer I know, um, this "Countess" girl...


PM LIST
Since I'm actually keeping one this time! Let me know if you want to be removed or added!
Star-Foozle
Veloz
Healer_Leona
Kynstar