Chill Mike D says: Listen to The Ice Man and Survive Winter Weather.

All My Finest Fellows and Compatriots, Old Man Winter is on his way. But do not fret. Rather, have courage. For the Bling Bling of the Ice King is hot enough to melt away all your Blizzardacious Blues. Take heed of what I profess to you as I confess the true way of How to Survive and Thrive the Baddest Winter Weather.

10) Your Lovely Lady will grow Hungry & Fungry if she blows in and gets snowed in with you in your PimpDaddy Pad. Therefore, keep a generous store of Mood Foods. I Smoothly suggest Sweet Potato Pie.

9) My Man, all the ice you need will be outside your door, so chill your wine in the freezer and in time you can ease her mind as she unwinds with a Glacial Glass of your Icey Libations.

8) All the Mojo Mamas love a good game of Uno.

7) Get your girl to draw near as you unfurl into her ear a Stunning Story of Playa-Jack Glory, for even the Coolest Kitten will melt in your palms if you sing a Smooth Psalm of manly Tom-Fun to her.

6) Light a Fire. But you knew that already. Smooth, as always.

5) Have patience. Remember, before a Playa gets Freaky he must play her Sneaky, for no Smooth Operator is an Instigator of Overanxiousnessosity.

4) Keep this rhyme in mind all the time: If your Lady's in town keep the toilet seat down.

3) My Brotha, get rid of the Stag Mags. No Mama is happy when her Main Pappy scorns her bed because of the porn in his head. Keep the Sting for the Real Thing.

2) Be Positiviciously sure to have Advil on hand, My Man. If you don't know why, just listen to me today lest you find out the hard way.

1) Girl, you are so On Fire that my Smooth Flyer sled is dead in its tracks on the Heavenly Hill of Your Love, for you have melted all snow in all the land, and I stand before you amazement. Damn.



Chill

 

Chill_Mike_D, what is the perfect type of the female species, for me?

 

A bodacious fem preacher boy.

 

I want the paragraph answer from Chill_Mike_D, thank you very much. This cool cat cracks me up.

 

I want chill to use the word Scrumptious.

 

Chill_Mike_D = Smooth

 

My Rocketing Reverend PreacherBoy Who will Meet Your Coy ways of Smooth Loving if you Think you Can Handle Him, for a Brotha like you just no lady will do. For she must be able to handle your Randy Rocketpack as you fly upward into the Starry Night of her soul. She must be Super-Fine all the time she as feels a connection to her lovely reflection in the Silvery Armor of your Smooth Super Soldier Battle Suit of Love. And she must not fear your lack of beer, for a Playa-Jack Daddy-Mack such as yourself treats all the ladies to only the Finest Wine. Smooth.

Chill

P.S. Oh yeah, Chilly D almost forgot. Chill Mike D doesn't know exactly why he can log in but not post from his most Super-Cool work computer. I have no idea what the IP address is. I can check PMs and surf around, but when I get down and try to post it says the D-man is in BanLand. Therefore, I am thoroughly confused. However, I have courage that PB is on the job. Peace.

Chill Take Two

 

My Mister He's Moving to SmoothLand and Taking the Coat Hook, Phone Line, and the Whole Damn Kitchen Sink with Him, you have indeed presented the D-Man with a Stallion's Challenge, for the word choice is not easy to voice in my Rhythm & Rhyme Diction of No Friction. But, have courage. For even the Most Consumptious of Foxes can't resist the Scrumptious Boxes of my Smooth Dark Chocolaty Love, no doubt.


My Dark Lord Erik who Merits Highest Honors by the Fellowship of Freakiness, Chill Mike D may be the Smooth Sweetener of the = sign, but to you I give the $ sign, for you are Money.

Chill

 

I am intrested: What kind of guy do I need to find Chill_Mike_D?

~Miss Jaina

 

Hahahahaha!!!!!!!!!


Chill Mike D you are as hip as one can be.

 

Chill_Mike_D- For you, anything. I just need more details on what "work" is. Private Message me with any details about your work's IP address.

 

Miss Jaina You Are the Cure to the Pain in My Heart, have courage. For you are a true Smooth-o-naut, voyaging amidst the Finest Stars in the Cosmos of Sweet Enticement. You need not look far for your Man-Comfort. Rather, he will come to you, for the Great Spaceship of Love travels without moving.

Mister There was Never a Kinkier Sinker than the Rapper with the Best HookLine this Side of Funkytown, it is indeed a trip to be hip. Many props and tasty Lamb-chops to the Man who perceives the Sting of the Ice King. Peace.

My Man Boy, I bet that Honey would Love to get her Hands on Your Preacher Cookies, the LAN man at work won't tell me our IP address. May I smoothly suggest checking out some of Bismarck's posts, as most of those were made at work. Maybe you can trace it backwards like a true Ace of Phat Words. It may be some unforseen and Super Green side effect of an IP ban, but the D-Man really doesn't know. Cool.

Chill

 

Ooh, I couldn't resist.
What guy do I need, Chill_Mike_D?

 

Thank You for you wonderful tips, Chill-D man!!!

 

//is furiously taking notes

Thanks D, you da man!

¤Night

 

Chill_Mike_D, man of all women. I would love to know your opinion on this thread?

 

He said in #4 keep the toilet seat down.


...FREEZING RAIN!!!

 

Chill Mike D, my Smooth Playa-Jack Brotha, what type of Milky Mama should I dwell with in my PimpDaddy Pad when the weather outside is much like a Hater, always interrupting my Game. I must know what type of Luscious Lady to invigorate.

Thanks, King Playa.

 

"//is furiously taking notes"

You're adorable, and on my user list now. ^ ^

 

My Miss MoonBrat who is All That And More, you need a Man most Regal who will soar like An Eagle into your Silvery Satelliteitiousness. He will glide his Moon-Lander onto that Part of You of Most Vivacious and Pander to your Heart Most Gracious, for you are that Fine.

My Mister Jedi Who Has Mastered the 22 Caliber Love Gun of Groove, your honors are most welcome. For you are a true Smooth Super Soldier that will heed my tips so that he may feed the lips of all the Sweet and Elite Belles in the Land. Ride on, my Stallion.

My Man He Could Show a Lovely Lady A Nice Night for just $45 and 54 Cents, your compliments make me humble. But do not stumble and take notes, for you have already wrote your Tactful Tale into the Love-Books of all the Finest Foxes. You are the Author of the Tome that has No Other Home than residing in the Hearts of All Honeys. Peace.

My Mister Even the Brightest of Playas are Dark next to the Shiny Shinyness of a Love Lord like Erik, the topic that you mention challenges the most basic of conventions, namely What your Body Spurns Should Not Return. However, I am an open-minded practitioner of Science and I can understand the appliance of the Warm Yellowness to mellow out some Aching Ailments. But I would be naught if I thought of trying such a thing before consulting a Daddy-Mack Doctor. Bottoms Up.

My Smooth Brotha Will You Take an F*in Luke at How He Keeps His Feet on the Ground While He Walks Through The Stars of Her Love, you need a Milky Mama who will ride your Lusty Llama across your Mountains of Mojo to reach the Tower of Power. For it is Worth the Wait. You shall find a Lady Most Luscious and whisper Sweet Hushes into her soft earlobe while the globe outside is covered in snow and your plans are No-Go. But do not fret. For you can entertain and ease her pain even if you are stuck inside and cannot ride away on such a cold day. Just think, don't worry but be glad when you are stuck in your pad with a Sexy Sista, for you will have time to sing rhymes and get freaky with your Cheeky Mama.

Miss Zasio How's Yo Curvy Curvaciousness Doin'?, it would be deplorable to decree that anyone could be as adorable as Thee, and it is good to see you again. I give Many Greetings and Buttery Salutations to You.

Chill

 

GOOD ENOUGH!

 

My Mister Jed, I know You Are the Master of All The Beverly Hillbillies and their 22 Friends, you are indeed worth a Deuce. The D-Man is not feeling to Slick with his Tricks today, and my Feet are most Fantabulously Frigid. Perhaps we can persuade some Steaming Stallion-Chasers to Sashay in here and Turn up the Heat to make my Toes Toasty. For I would do the same for them, but good.

Chill

 

*sniff* I missed out on all the fun!

oh, and where were y'all when I couldn't get into my car this morning? Some help getting the doors unfroze would have been appreciated

 

Really? You can hardly open the doors?

Just overnight?

 

Reading insane jibberish like this reminds me of the importance (and obvious dismal failure) of natural selection.

Well, also Natural Ice, but thats another story.