Saga Commencement Day- Qui Gon/Dooku...Short...Completed

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Zane-Marit, Feb 20, 2004.

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  1. Zane-Marit Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2003
    star 3
    Commencement Day


    It is early in the morning and the suns rays have yet to reach the windows of the Jedi councils chamber. Despite the early hour, all council members are present and seated in their customary circle. In the center of that circle stood a tall thin human male, middle aged but with a regality not common among other Jedi. It is this trait that stands out to the council and the respect they have for this master is evident by their gathering at such an early hour.

    ?Something to say have you, Master Dooku?? invited Master Yoda, beginning the session.
    ?I thank the council for seeing me on such short notice, I will be brief.? Dooku let out a slow breath before continuing. ?I know at times my thought and opinions on certain matters have not always held sway with the council, but I have always followed the councils decision. It was my duty as a Jedi. But, I can not in good conscience do that anymore. From this day on, I renounce my commission to the Jedi order. I will no longer defend a Republic that has fattened itself with greed and corruption.?

    Master Yoda stroked his chin as he sat in deep thought. His eyes closed. It was Master Windu that finally broke the silence.

    ?We understand how you feel, especially after what happened on Tellis IV. Three senators have been detained and face a full court tribunal for their actions. You can not blame the entire Senate for the actions of a few.?

    ?But I was directly involved! My actions almost led to a political coup, so that a small group could profit!? Dooku said through a clenched jaw, venom coating the words. ?It has happened in the past and IT WILL happen again. The Republic does not have strong enough leadership or moral character to end this corruption. I will not allow myself to be a party in any Republic actions again, and I strongly urge each and every one of you to consider my words. Trust me, the Republic will soon fall.?
    ?Trust in the Force, we do.? Yoda said calmly. ?As should you.?

    Dooku smiled faintly and shook his head. ?I do master?I do. This is where the Force is guiding me. I have done all I can here. I have tried to open all of your eyes to what?s coming, but you have chosen blind faith?I am no longer blind.?

    Yoda looked around the chamber, reading each and every members mood. He stopped with Master Windu, who nodded resignedly in agreement. The small master then looked to master Dooku, studying him, finger pursed to his lip.

    ?Sad this is. Sense it coming I have.? Yoda said, his voice low and deep. ?Disappointed your padawan will be. Understand this he will not.?

    ?My padawan will be fine. I trained him well and he will be knighted today. I will be honored to perform the ceremony. I owe him that. I will leave the temple afterwards, but I want you all to know that if you ever truly need me, I will of course help in any way.? Dooku finished.

    He did not wait for reply or comment from the council. He turned on his heel and exited the chamber, his gray robe bobbing in step with his quick pace.


    Qui Gon Jinn sat on his knees in the center of his dormitory, high in the Jedi Temple. His heart pounded heavily in his chest as his thoughts ran rampant. For the first time in a long while Qui Gon found it difficult to clear his mind for meditation, but it was understandable as to why. This day was Qui Gon Jinns commencement day, the day he would become a Knight in the Jedi order.

    Qui Gon reflected upon his trial, slowly replaying every detail of the event. He remembered the pride he felt within himself as well as that from his master when the task was completed successfully. Qui Gon sensed a familiar presence approaching and pushed the thoughts from his mind gently as the door to his chamber slid open.

    ?Hello Master.? Qui Gon addressed his master, still feigning meditation.

    Qui Gons master said nothing as the door closed. The tall slender human gazed down at his soon to be former apprentice with a stern, somewhat distant expression. Qui Gon slowly opened one eye to look upon his master as he dutifull
  2. Reihla Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    May 17, 2002
    star 3
    Good job with this story. I've seen Dooku's renouncement of the Jedi Order portrayed before (not on TF.N), but this version is much better. I think you've captured Dooku's idealism perfectly. I also liked how you had him ask Qui-Gon to leave with him. Nice touch and very realistic given the strength of their bond.

  3. Zane-Marit Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2003
    star 3
    Thanks for the comment. This was an idea that just popped into my head. I worked on this for about 2 hours (and it probably shows)and posted it. I haven't seen anything on Dookus leaving the order or his relationship with Qui Gon. I know I probably could have done much better with this had I taken the time, but I just wanted to get a short story out. I don't think I am going to do anymore lengthy stories, people tend to lose interest in them, so I will try to stick to short stories.

    Just as a side thought. I was going to get more involved in the Tellis IV fiasco. I was also going to have Dooku contact Sidious when pulling away from the Jedi temple and he would then get his orders to find a clone template (Jango)for Kamino. I was also going to have Qui Gon exit the lift inside the temple and begin the process of selecting(a very young)Obi Wan as his apprentice. I thought that it would have tied some things together nicely. But, in the end, I think it would have caused a backlash with timeline issues and such. Therefore, I left it out.

    Thanks for reading...
  4. Zane-Marit Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2003
    star 3
    No other thoughts....
  5. Gina Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2003
    star 4
    I really liked this story. You portrayed Dooku's disillusionment very well. I also liked the parting scene between Qui-Gon and Dooku, when he gives Qui-Gon the lightsaber and braid.








  6. Zane-Marit Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2003
    star 3
    Thanks Gina...Glad you liked it. I am not sure if I conveyed it properly enough in the story so let me say it here...The saber Dooku gives Qui Gon id the one we actually see in EPI.

    I am not sure if the Jedi would allow someone to use anothers saber if it were given as a gift, but I figured what the heck...
  7. Zane-Marit Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2003
    star 3
  8. amidalachick Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Aug 3, 2003
    star 5
    Cool story.

    I will leave the temple afterwards, but I want you all to know that if you ever truly need me, I will of course help in any way.?

    I really like that line. A bit of foreshadowing, perhaps?

    Nice icon, too. :D
  9. Zane-Marit Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2003
    star 3
    Thanks Amidala...Yeah..I thought that was a neat little line. I am dissapointed now that i didn't get more into his "Political Idealist" persona...oh well...I may go into detail more on the events that drove Dooku from the order on Tellis IV.
  10. Jedi_Trevor_GulDan Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Dec 17, 2003
    star 1
    Zane:

    Very interesting perspective. Very well portrayed. I like the concept of the Jedi Knighting ceremony.

    I look forward to more short stories like this..
  11. Zane-Marit Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2003
    star 3
    Thanks Trevor...I have no real idea what it would be like, especially in the heyday, so I had to wing it.

    I have other short stories on the board so check them out....
  12. ppal Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Aug 13, 1999
    star 1
    I read the story and it is a good story, however, there are a few inconsistencies here. First of all Dooku had several padawans before and after que-gon. The latest being that chick who joined the Bando Gora right before Dooku left. Second of all I'm glad you didn't make Obi-wan Que-gon's first padawan because he wasn't Xanatos was. And also I believe Dooku officially left the order right before or possibly the after the events of TPM. But a nice story nevertheless.
  13. Zane-Marit Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jul 11, 2003
    star 3
    Thanks for the info PPal...

    I have to be honest. I did not do a lot of research on Dooku when I wrote this (obviously). The only prequel era books I have read are rogue planet and cloak of deception. Nothing much on Dooku. I just thought of this and wrote it down. Glad you liked it despite the inconsistencies and I appreciate you letting me know about it.
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