Current Events

I thought we needed a topic to discuss what's going on in our world today. With the tensions in the middle east, to the corporate giants of the US, the world seems more unstable than ever.

Something to ponder today:

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Bats take over apartment
27jun02

A UNITED States man has been forced from his house after it was over-run by bats.

Bats have turned up in the shower, sink and sheets of Grant Griffin's one-bedroom apartment in Bradenton, Florida - so he is moving.

Exterminators aren't allowed to kill the bats, which are considered native wildlife and can't be trapped or poisoned, said University of Florida assistant professor Mark Hostetler.

They can only be killed if they are rabid, which county health officials are testing for after Griffin and his girlfriend discovered bite marks.

"I'm freaked out. I'm about as freaked out as I can get," said Griffin, 49.

"I feel like there are things crawling all over me." Bats can be locked out of houses by closing up the holes where they enter.

But now, in the peak of the three-month bat birthing season, that would prevent mother bats from returning to their babies inside the house. The babies would die and the stench would be unbearable, said Hostetler.

The Associated Press[hr][/blockquote]

 

And in other news, Greenpeace have announced that they are now, in fact, opposed to everything.

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[b]Known for its long-standing opposition to whaling, logging, strip mining, genetically modified food, nuclear power, the chemical industry, wars, corporations, politics, and weapons, the activist group Greenpeace today announced that as of 12:01 this morning, it will just oppose everything.

Greenpeace spokesperson Wendy Albright explains how the group now opposes everything, including the use of color.
"It's all bad, it all needs to stop," said a Greenpeace spokesperson, who added the group will no longer send out action alerts calling for opposition to specific issues, but will instead issue daily alerts to all members that read, "No" in 37 different languages.

The new directive took effect immediately after midnight, as the famous Greenpeace ship Rainbow Warrior was ordered to oppose the first thing available, which turned out to be Barbados.

"Stupid Barbados. You must be stopped!" yelled wild-eyed Rainbow Warrior captain Niels Sturngen as he drove the bow directly into what turned out to be a beach. "Surrender," Sturngen added.

At a press conference late this morning, Greenpeace spokesperson Wendy Albright explained the group's new stance and fielded questions from reporters.

"So you're opposed to everything?" asked one reporter. "Even, say, fruit salad?"

"Can't stand it," said Albright.

"Paleolithic art?

"Yuck."

"What about Pink?"

"Hate the color, hate the singer."

Even on issues Greenpeace has traditionally defended, Albright refused to waver.

"What about solar power?" asked a journalist.

"Stupid idea," said Albright.

"But you've always supported solar power."

"I'm not answering any more of your questions."

"Why not?"

"I don't like them."[/b][hr][/blockquote]

 

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[b]Rogue shooters kill 4m croc[/b]
[i]By Nigel Adlam[/i]
26jun02

ANOTHER large crocodile has been killed illegally in a Top End river as tour operators suspect a backlash against cuts to the number of reptiles harvested.

It is at least the fourth saltwater crocodile shot at Shady Camp on the Mary River this year.

The 4.2m male was found floating in the river by tour boat operator Charlie Garske yesterday.

He believes the shooters are angry at the Parks and Wildlife Commission's reduction in the number of crocodiles that can be legally harvested.

The commission has cut the number of crocodiles that can be caught and then shot by licensed operators on the Mary River from 60 to 25 a year.

The move followed complaints by tour operators that big salties were becoming scarce along the Mary and Wildman rivers since harvesting began four years ago.

Mr Garske, who runs Shady Camp Boat Tours, said the latest crocodile to die had been shot in the back of the neck.

``They don't fight until October or November so I knew straight away that it hadn't died in a territorial battle,'' he said.

``And it wasn't shot by poachers. They always cut off trophies, but nothing was taken from this animal.''

Mr Garske said Top End tourist operators feared an anti-crocodile feeling was growing in the Territory.

``The last thing we want is people thinking it's open season on crocodiles,'' he said.

``The one unique thing the Territory has is big crocodiles accessible for tourists to see.''

He said big crocodiles were shot out in north-east Queensland after Beryl Wruck was taken by a saltie in the Daintree River in 1985.

``Their tourist industry regrets that now,'' said Mr Garske. ``They don't have any big crocs to show off to paying guests.''

Simon Stirrat, Parks and Wildlife conservation management officer for crocodiles, said it was hard for rangers to catch illegal shooters. ``Unless people report incidents and give us hard evidence there's little we can do,'' he said.

Mr Stirrat said crocodiles had been shot illegally since protection was introduced in the Territory in 1971.

He denied an anti-crocodile feeling was emerging.

``If there was, there would be more incidents with crocodiles,'' he said.

[link=http://news.com.au/common/story_page/0,4057,4581888%255E13762,00.html]Northern Territory News[/link][hr][/blockquote]
We need more crocs!

 

***king maniacs. They just go around killing whatever they feel like.

[image=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:VSc7nONaqUkC:www.fotonatura.com/portfolio/meinderts/wmeind3.jpg]

 

elsewhere...

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[b]Hotel Pays Dearly for Pork Chop Shoes[/b]
[i]Thu Jun 27, 9:19 AM ET[/i]

SYDNEY (Reuters) - How much does a pair of pork chop shoes cost?

If you're the licensee of the Jannali Inn in Sydney's south the price tag is a slippery U.S. $34,817.

That's how much a Sydney court awarded in damages to a man injured when he slipped on the inn's greasy floor after a drinker tied pork chops to his feet to satisfy a requirement to wear shoes to get served, local media reported on Thursday.

Troy Bowron, 25, broke his arm, requiring two plates and 12 pins to fix, when he fell on the greasy floor in November 1997. Bowron sued the inn and the drinker for pain and suffering and loss of income.

Ross Lucock, who had been drinking at the inn and was described as "a bit wobbly" by patrons, was eventually refused service by bar staff for not wearing shoes, the New South Wales District Court heard this week.

Lucock returned a short time later wearing a pair of pork chops, which he had won in a raffle earlier, tied to his feet.

As the pork chop shoes disintegrated the hotel floor became slippery and Bowron fell after playing pool.

District court judge Anthony Puckeridge ruled on Thursday that the hotel had breached its duty of care by failing to clean up the greasy trail left by Lucock, Australian Associated Press said. Lucock was cleared of any responsibility for the accident.
[hr][/blockquote]

 

The Who's Entwistle dies on eve of tour

June 27, 2002 Posted: 7:22 PM EDT (2322 GMT)

LOS ANGELES, California (Reuters) -- John Entwistle, the bass player for veteran British rock band The Who, died in Las Vegas Thursday at age 57, just one day before the group was set to begin a North American tour in the city, the Clark County Coroner said.

Entwistle, a bearded, taciturn type affectionately known as "Ox," died at the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino, said coroner Ron Flud. An investigation was under way into the cause of death, he added.

The Who, known for such hits as "My Generation," "Pinball Wizard" and "Won't Get Fooled Again," were scheduled to begin their three-month tour in a small club at the hotel.

With Entwistle's death, The Who are down to just two original members, singer Roger Daltrey and guitarist/songwriter Pete Townshend. Original drummer Keith Moon died of an accidental pill overdose in 1978.

In addition to playing bass, Entwistle helped out on backing vocals. His songwriting contributions to The Who were sporadic, mostly limited to a few album tracks and B-sides. He released a half-dozen solo albums.

Entwistle, who was born in the London suburb of Chiswick on October 9, 1944, joined Daltrey in a forerunner of The Who in the early 1960s while working as a tax clerk. The band ultimately took shape in 1964 and made an immediate impression with its "Mod" stylings and its expensive habit of trashing all its stage equipment after each set.


Dang.

It's remarkable: with The Who, the bassist and drummer died while the guitarists survive; with The Beatles, the guitarists died and the bassist and drummer survive.

 

that is remarkable.

entwistle was sort of the unsung member of the who, but he was truly a gifted musician. in addition to playing bass, he also arranged all the string parts in their rock operas.

 

He was a bit like Harrison: in the back, but still crucial to the band.

 

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[b]Texans Chip in to Rescue Stranded Chicken-Hypnotist[/b]
[i]Fri Jun 28, 9:19 AM ET[/i]

LONDON (Reuters) - The plight of an Alaskan chicken-hypnotist whose circus tour was cut short in Edinburgh when a charity shop sold her bicycle by mistake has tweaked heartstrings as far afield as Austin, Texas.

Emily Harris left the 1,200-pound ($1,800) bicycle inside the shop this week and found it was missing after she came out of a fitting room. A shop assistant had sold it for 10 pounds.

Now a group of Austin engineers, who read about her loss on the Internet, have raised $525 to help the 25-year-old from Palmer, Alaska, buy a new bicycle and resume her tour.

"There's been tons of layoffs here, Austin's been hit pretty hard with the technology sector, so we're just looking to do something to cheer ourselves up," software engineer Lawrence Hartley, who started the impromptu fundraising, told Reuters.

Hartley said he and his friends had identified with Harris after reading that her star act consisted of hypnotizing chickens and making them play the piano.

"We're all pretty much not quite normal. We identify more with a chicken-hypnotist than with the normal world," he said.

He and his friends have unusual hobbies of their own. One is building a submarine in his garage and several others practice "geo-caching," a form of treasure-hunting using satellite communications systems.

Harris was thrilled to hear of their efforts on her behalf and said $500 was enough for her to purchase a new bicycle and join her troupe for the rest of their tour of Britain.
[hr][/blockquote]

 

The CURSE of THE SIMPSONS: Guest Stars Dropping like Flies.
PROOF INSIDE! - (Image Heavy)


BREAKING NEWS

From Our Correspondent jp-30

GUEST STARS on the popular FOX CARTOON show "THE SIMPSONS" have been DYING OFF at an ALARMING RATE.

If we put aside the BRUTAL MURDER of cast regulars like PHIL HARTMAN, and just concentrate on the GUESTS... well let's RECAP;

[image=http://www.springfield.com/bios/images/bios_guests_mccartneys.gif]
Linda McCartney

[image=http://simpsons.metropoliglobal.com/famosos/9F21GeorgeHarrison.jpg]
George Harrison

[image=http://www.springfield.com/bios/images/bios_guests_ramones.gif]
DeeDee Ramone

[image=http://www.springfield.com/bios/images/bios_guests_ramones.gif]
Joey Ramone

[image=http://simpsons.metropoliglobal.com/famosos/4F08JackLemmon.jpg]
Jack Lemmon

[image=http://simpsons.metropoliglobal.com/famosos/5F05StephenJayGould.jpg]
Steven Jay Gould

[image=http://simpsons.metropoliglobal.com/famosos/1F07WernerKlemperer.jpg]
Werner Klemperer

[image=http://simpsons.metropoliglobal.com/famosos/2F32SteveAllen.jpg]
Steve Allen

[image=http://simpsons.metropoliglobal.com/famosos/2F16TitoPuente.jpg]
Tito Puente

[image=http://simpsons.metropoliglobal.com/famosos/BABF16JoeC.jpg]
Joe C

And of course yesterday's shock death;

[image=http://simpsons.metropoliglobal.com/famosos/BABF20TheWho.jpg]
John Entwistle


Furthermore several became severely ill right after their appearances:

[image=http://simpsons.metropoliglobal.com/famosos/3F24JohnnyCash.jpg]
Johnny Cash

[image=http://simpsons.metropoliglobal.com/famosos/9F02BobHope.jpg]
Bob Hope

[image=http://simpsons.metropoliglobal.com/famosos/9F20DavidCrosby.jpg]
David Crosby

[image=http://simpsons.metropoliglobal.com/famosos/4F05RodneyDangerfield.jpg]
Rodney Dangerfield

[image=http://simpsons.metropoliglobal.com/famosos/BABF17StephenKing.jpg]
Stephen King

[image=http://simpsons.metropoliglobal.com/famosos/3F21SmashingPumpkins.jpg]

And the Smashing Pumpkins split up.

Is one of the above the next to fall under the "CURSE OF THE SIMPSONS" and DIE! Or will it be some other CRUSTY like Hugh Hefner, Mickey Rooney, Ernest Borgnine, Steven Hawking, Leonard Nimoy or U2?

Celebrities be WARNED! DO NOT APPEAR ON THE SIMPSONS IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE!

 

[face_shocked] woah, that's kind of freaky.

 

Gunfire kills three at LA Airport.

Small plane crashes in LA park.

//sigh

 

This is so sad... They're describing the suspect as being "Arab in appearance". Wow, that's not sensationalist at all...

 

I don't believe any speculation until it's pretty much fact, when it comes to this crap.


I heard it was a white guy with blonde hair and a pony tail.

It is very sad, though.

 

I know about five people that were at the airport today and one person that works there. My friend's cousin was actually two counters over from the shooter. Scary scary.

 

Something a bit more cheerful, it's Porkins' birthday today!!

My friends in Indianapolis will know about certain events at Lotus that led to lots of beer being consumed with said birthday boy.

Happy Birthday Mr Hootkins. Don't let that bastard Ian Holm get you down.

 

happy b-day porkins!

and in other news...

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Man Foots Bill for Causing Stink in Library
Fri Jul 5,12:58 PM ET

AMSTERDAM (Reuters) - A sweaty-footed Dutchman who caused a stink by removing his shoes in a university library has been fined by magistrates, Dutch media reported on Friday.

The 39-year-old Rotterdam man was fined 250 euros (U.S. $245) in The Hague on Thursday for defying a ban on taking off shoes in a college library in the western town of Delft, daily Het Financieele Dagblad said.

The newspaper said the magistrates "decided his sweaty feet smelled so bad he was a public nuisance."
[hr][/blockquote]

 

Rotterdam, more like Rottendam.

Get it? Because his feet were smelly.

OK, so it isn't that funny.

Erik

 

no really, i'm laughing with you not at you

 

Well, at least someone is laughing with me.

//looks at everyone else

I'll get all of you!

 

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[b]Ex-Mounties Guilty of Assault with Fruit, Veggies[/b]
[i]Fri Jul 5, 8:11 AM ET[/i]

WINNIPEG, Manitoba (Reuters) - Two former members of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police have been convicted of assault with a weapon after attacking Winnipeg city police officers with fruit and vegetables.


The two retired Mounties, who are brothers, were sentenced on Tuesday to two months in jail.

"The two of you are a disgrace to every RCMP officer in Canada and to every peace officer in Canada," Manitoba Judge, Arnold Connor, was quoted as telling David Dauphinee, 52, and Daniel Dauphinee, 51, by newspapers that attended the trial.

The produce assault took place in June, when police arrived at a downtown Winnipeg apartment building to investigate an unrelated break-in.

When the Dauphinee duo, who were visiting a 19th-floor suite in the same building, spotted police on the street below, they began hurling oranges at them. They reloaded with apples and cooking onions.

The Winnipeg police officers testified that they feared for their safety when the oranges and onions started exploding around them. When they arrived at the door of the suite, the recently retired Mounties, said be in a drunken stupor, hopped into bed and pretended to be asleep.

They tried to blame David Dauphinee's then-girlfriend, Diane Bartlett, for the fruit and vegetable barrage, but a physiotherapist testified she was too petite to throw the oranges and onions that far. At the trial, Bartlett referred to the brothers as "Dumb and Dumber" and "the Gruesome Two-some."
[hr][/blockquote]

 

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[b]Estonians Prove World Beaters at Wife-Carrying[/b]
Mon Jul 8, 3:40 PM ET

[i]By Paul de Bendern[/i]

SONKAJARVI, Finland (Reuters) - Estonians ran off with the world wife-carrying title for the fifth year in a row despite new rules on the weight of the spouse.

Using the trademark "Estonia carry," in which the woman squeezes her thighs on the sides of the man's face while hanging upside down along his back, Meelis Tammre, 24, and Anna Zilberberg, 21, were fastest round the 278-yard course.

Thirty-six couples from eight countries took part in the event, in which a man has to carry his wife or partner over a rough track that includes two timber hurdles and a chest-high water pool.

"I have come second three times. Finally I have won," said an exhausted Tammre, who won with a time of one minute four seconds. "But the competition is getting tougher."

Up to 6,000 people watched as the couples braved bad weather to toil round the course in a rough forest clearing near the central Finnish village of Sonkajarvi, only a few hours' drive from the Arctic Circle.

Women contestants wore crash helmets due to the inherent perils of the favored "Estonia carry" upside-down position, which allows the man to run and use his arms freely.

A new minimum weight requirement for the women of 108 pounds was introduced this year. Competitors had to add weights if necessary to make up the difference.

Absent were last year's champions Margo Uusorg and Birgit Ulricht -- weighing only 75 pounds -- from Estonia, famous for inventing the spouse-toting hold now used by most competitors.

LEGENDARY WIFE THEFT

Wife-carrying is rooted in local history. It is linked to the legend of a local chieftain, Ronkkainen the Robber, whose gang stole wives from rivals in neighboring villages.

The idea was revived in contest form 10 years ago and is held every year. The popularity of the bizarre sport has led to the creation of North American, Danish, Finnish and Estonian wife carrying championships.

Top prize is the female champion's weight in beer -- in this case Anna's 108 pounds.

Competitors this year included couples from Britain, Estonia, Finland, United States, Netherlands and Norway.

Estonians explained their strengths.

"Our men as so fit, they do other sports. My partner has been a professional athlete for 12 years," said Zilberberg, who admitted she had to gain four pounds to reach the 108-pound weight limit.

"Estonians win because they have thin and beautiful women," she said with a smile.

Finns Taisto Miettinen and Heidi Yliharju came second with Estonian couple Jaanus and Anneli Undrest third.

"We've been surprised that foreigners, especially Estonians, take it so seriously. When we started the event it was only fun. The way it's going it could become an Olympic event," said Finn Sari Ronkainen, who runs a local glass business.

"I am in a world of pain but I'm happy. I survived the water obstacle and I can't even swim," said Briton Mark Hawkins, a 27-year-old electrical engineer from Bristol, who is soon to marry his Finnish fiancee Sari Tuppurainen. [hr][/blockquote]

 

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[b]Football Team Fired for Playing Pool While Naked[/b]
[i]Fri Jul 19,10:50 AM ET[/i]

DUBLIN (Reuters) - A Gaelic football team has been disbanded after players were caught on a hotel security camera playing pool naked during a late night drinking session.

County Roscommon's Gaelic Athletic Association said the drastic decision to sack the entire county side had been taken to restore the good name of the team after allegations of off-the-pitch misbehavior.

"We feel this is something we have to do for the good of Roscommon football. It's a fresh start," county board chairman Stephen Banahan was quoted as saying in Friday's edition of the Irish Sun newspaper.

In May, a Sunday tabloid carried pictures of Roscommon footballers playing pool in the nude in a Londonderry hotel after a friendly match against Donegal earlier in the season.

It was also claimed that one player roamed around the Northern Irish hotel in a pair of frilly lace knickers.

Two players made public apologies over the affair, but rumors of further bad behavior have dogged the team along with a poor summer season on the pitch.

Banahan said some of the stories were exaggerated, but added "Obviously there is truth in some of the rumors."

Members of the disbanded team have been told they must own up to any misbehavior and sign a strict code of conduct to stand a chance of being picked again for the western county.

Gaelic football, a hybrid of soccer and rugby, is Ireland's national game.

Each summer teams from the 32 counties of the Irish Republic and Northern Ireland, as well as sides from London and New York, compete in the All-Ireland Championship series, which climaxes in a showpiece final at Dublin's Croke Park in September.[hr][/blockquote]

 

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[b]Worker dies in chocolate vat[/b]
[i]July 24, 2002[/i]

HATFIELD, Pennsylvania: A Pennsylvania candy factory worker died after being submerged in a 4,542 litre-vat of liquefied chocolate, police said.

Yoni Cordon, 19, of Philadelphia, was discovered in the vat by co-workers at the Kargher Corp yesterday, authorities said.

Police said they believe Cordon had been working on a platform near the opening of the vat, which is used for mixing and melting chocolate.

Nobody saw Cordon fall and it was unknown how long he was submerged before he was found, Hatfield Township police detective Patrick M Hanrahan said.

Hanrahan said foul play was not suspected and the death was being investigated as an accident.

The Associated Press[hr][/blockquote]

I want to die like that. ;\