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Dear George,

Discussion in 'Prequel Trilogy' started by Mace Windy, Jun 4, 2004.

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  1. Mace Windy

    Mace Windy Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jul 3, 1999
    Dear George,

    I have always been very awkward around women. Ever since I was a little boy, the most that I could do around a beautiful girl was carve her some dopey wooden necklace or ask her some stupid question like, "are you an angel?" I haven't had much time since then to really get to know any cute females, what with me being in Jedi training and all, but I've recently been reacquainted with what you might call an old flame. She is remarkably beautiful and I dream about her every night - when I'm not dreaming about my mother that is. I've recently been given a great opportunity, no doubt by the will of the force. You see, she and I work together, sort of. Well, she was almost assassinated and I've been assigned to protect her as a body guard. Obviously my duties as a body guard are number one, but I would love nothing less than to marry this girl.

    I am wondering exactly what it is that I need to do to gain her love, and I need advice on how to go about perusing an attractive co-worker.

    - Jedi In Love

    Dear In Love,

    Wait? You're a Jedi? Aren't Jedi forbidden from falling in love? If you are willing to risk being expelled from the Jedi order, I have a few tips of advice for you.

    Compromising a relationship with a co-worker would create a very unfortunate and awkward situation. Be sure that you really love this girl before you plan to make any moves on her. Based upon your above comments, I get the impression that you may just being seeking a "bit of action." You mention that you dream of your mother on a regular basis. This is what Freud deemed an Oedipus complex, and can come into being from long periods of abstinence.

    If you do in fact love her, make sure to be subtle. When you are with her, do not ask her bold question such as "are you an angel," rather, make small talk with her. Make small talk about the weather, the state of the galaxy, or sand. If that doesn't work, have a quiet dinner for two prepared, and constantly be the gentleman. Cut her food for her, if that is what it takes! If she still hasn't come around, I suggest that you poetically tell her all of your feelings in a comfortable setting. If all else fails, you can never go wrong by getting held captive by greedy leaders of the Separatists. She will warm up to you in no time!

    - George Lucas

    Dear George,

    I am a single father with a young son, living on a planet which is hardly suitable for raising a child. I'm a simple man, really, trying to make my way in the universe, but I fear that I am not giving my son the kind of attention that he needs. My job requires me to do a lot of traveling, and while I would like to bring my son along for the ride, I am not quite sure if he is really ready to see exactly what it is that his father does for a living. To make matters worse, he has developed into quite an angry little guy, and I am beginning to blame myself for this transition. What should I do?

    - Daddy Fett

    Dear Daddy,

    You're predicament is typical. Except for the various Queens of Naboo, these last few years have been economically tough on everybody. I think that it is very noble that you miss your son when you travel and that you'd like to take him along with you on a few of your outings. I'd take those feelings as a sign that you should think about allowing your song to fly along with you. Perhaps you are embarrassed by your line of work, but once your son realizes that you're doing it for him, he'll love you that much more! Who knows, maybe he'll even be so inspired by the work that you do that he'll want to get involved in the same business once he, too, has a family to think about!

    - George Lucas

    Dear George,

    I am one of the leading members of a very powerful organization. Lately, things have gotten more than a little tense around here. We've recently discovered that a clone army was created for us without our authorization. Now, we are a peace loving organization and would like to resist from using our army at all costs. However, we have also rec
  2. TheHighEmperor

    TheHighEmperor Jedi Master star 2

    Feb 9, 2001
    This proves why Windy is da Man!

  3. royalguard96

    royalguard96 Jedi Knight star 5

    Aug 13, 2001
    Step off, Dear Abby :cool:
  4. JediMasterSifoDyas

    JediMasterSifoDyas Jedi Youngling star 1

    Jun 13, 2002
    That was great..Nice work
  5. Ekenobi

    Ekenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Apr 4, 2002
    Sorry to bust your bubble, but you letter from Mace is contradicted by the follow up letter from George.

    First you say from Mace:
    "However, we have also recently discovered that one of our own has been captured on the planet of Geonosis by the Separatists".

    But then you contradict this in your response from George:
    "My suggestion: take all of the remaining members of your organization to Geonoisis, save one, whom you should send to inspect the cloning facilities"

    Now the person George suggests to check out the facility is already captured but what Mace says. Am I right?
  6. Darth-Seldon

    Darth-Seldon Jedi Grand Master star 6

    May 17, 2003
    Great job Windy.
    I like the Anakin one the best.

  7. Palpateen

    Palpateen Jedi Padawan star 4

    Apr 26, 2000


    What would a letter be like to George from Supreme Chancellor Palpatine?

  8. Garth Maul

    Garth Maul Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    May 18, 2002
    Windy, that's the funniest thing I've seen in a while, with the possible exception of Jack Black's song in School of Rock.
  9. PadmeASkywalker

    PadmeASkywalker Jedi Youngling

    Mar 7, 2004

    Good work! :)
  10. Vindaxxus

    Vindaxxus Jedi Master star 4

    Aug 29, 2000
    Brought a smile to my face today.
  11. DarthBoba

    DarthBoba Manager Emeritus star 9 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jun 29, 2000
    LOL, funny.

    Yeah, do a Palpatine one!
  12. ThrawnRocks

    ThrawnRocks Jedi Master star 6

    Apr 10, 2004
    That was great! [face_laugh]

    Ekenobi, I belive he was refering to Yoda going to check out the clone army after Palps in given emerency power.

    Once again, great!
  13. Rogue...Jedi

    Rogue...Jedi Administrator Emeritus star 7 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jan 12, 2000

    Classic! Very well done!
  14. RebelScum77

    RebelScum77 Manager Emeritus star 6 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Aug 3, 2003
    LMAO! [face_laugh]

    This is why I love you Windy.
  15. Ekenobi

    Ekenobi Jedi Padawan star 4

    Apr 4, 2002
    Ah yes I stand corrected.
  16. jedi_master_ousley

    jedi_master_ousley Manager Emeritus star 8 VIP - Former Mod/RSA

    Jun 14, 2002
    Great stuff, Windy. :cool:
  17. DarthTerrious

    DarthTerrious Jedi Master star 5

    May 16, 2001
    [face_laugh] [face_laugh]

    Windy, that was some of your finest work.
  18. Darth-Seldon

    Darth-Seldon Jedi Grand Master star 6

    May 17, 2003
    Forget Palps, do a Jar Jar one about how he is afraid of how he will perform in the senate.

  19. rogue_wookiee

    rogue_wookiee Jedi Youngling star 6

    Apr 24, 2004
    Good one Windy. Almost as funny as Allston or some of the stupid theories floating around the Eu boards.
  20. PalpatineAntikristos

    PalpatineAntikristos Jedi Youngling star 3

    Oct 6, 2002
    This is the best new thread in quite a while. It reminds me of the once popular, and much missed, Larry King's Conversations with Chancellor Palpatine in the 3SA.
  21. Pepijn

    Pepijn Jedi Padawan star 4

    Jun 28, 2002
  22. DarthShona

    DarthShona Jedi Master star 5

    Jul 29, 2003
    Also, kill the man from my above letter.

    LOL!! Windy, you rock! [face_laugh]
  23. Katana_Geldar

    Katana_Geldar Jedi Grand Master star 8

    Mar 3, 2003

    you rock windy, i reckon you should do a palps one, perhaps jar jar

    suggestion for jar jars psudonym: Dellow Fellegate
  24. DarthShona

    DarthShona Jedi Master star 5

    Jul 29, 2003

    You should do one from Obi-Wan too!
  25. Darth-Kevin-Thomas

    Darth-Kevin-Thomas Jedi Master star 5

    Sep 27, 2002
    it seems like a soap opera. How funny would that be.
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