LA, CA Dear Skyryder...

Aaaaah, William Goldman, truly one of the greatest screenwriters of all time!

 

I'm here to help.

By the Force
Skyryder

 

Dear Skyryder,
I bought a pair of new leather gloves for this Star Wars costume I'm making. The gloves smell nasty. What can I do to get rid of the smell? It made my Star Wars room really smelly. I put the gloves in the garage, and now my garage is really smelly.

Sincerely,

No Glove, no love.

 

Dear Glove

Can you tell if the smell is coming from the outside or the inside? Try these useful tips.

SOCK STUFFED WITH CEDAR CHIPS
Fill a pair of cotton socks with cedar chips and tie off the ends. After airing out your gloves, stuff a sock into each glove. You can buy cedar chips at a pet store(Hampster Bedding) and it works great.

If that fails then just plan to sit by yourself at CIV. But think on the bright side, you can just not bathe now and if someone says something just blame the glove.

By the Force
Skyryder

 

Dear SR,
I cut my finger yesterday and it hurts to type with my right hand. What should I do?

Sincerely,
Fingerlickin' no-fun

 

Dear Fingerlicking.

Hire someone to type for you. Also, use those ne fangled second skin bandages. I used them on my feet after the Rose Parade. Loved them.

By the Force
Skyryder

 

Dear Skyryder,

Why is it when you're nice to women, they want to kick you to the curb and be mean to you? I keep hearing "I want a nice guy" and "I want someone who'll be there" and my personal favorite "It's all about personality" but when you try to appeal to someone in that way, they just don't to want to have anything to do with you anymore. Why is that when I want to buy someone dinner/lunch/movie they only eat half their plate, and play this hard to get game? Why is it that I get the short end of the stick when I play by the rules? Why am I finding my Wii and my DS to be more entertaining and reliable than a woman?

Sincerely,
Lost in Wonderland

 

Dear Wonderland
First off you're asking a guy who doesn't date women. So what do I know, but here is what I think. You can't stress over this stuff. Things like this happen when they happen you can't force them. Now here is the part that may be a bit rough to hear, and you have to be honest with yourself. Are you looking for girls out of your league? If you are looking for a "10" and you're not a "10" you may be wasting your time. Now, I'm not saying you're ugly and I'm not saying women are vain, but physical appearance is what first draws you in, then it's the personality. Are you confident when speaking to women? When I walk into a place looking to meet someone, I walk in like I own the joint that everyone is there to see me. The quiet mousey guy in the dark corner isn't going to get noticed. Did you see the Birds of Paradise on Planet Earth? You have to act a little like that. I don't mean wear bright clothes and jump around the middle of the room, I'm just saying you got to get yourself noticed. People of both sexes want a mate that takes care of themselves, strong on the inside and out, confident, smart, funny, have a good job, drive a car that runs, a nice place to live, and cool friends. It's the whole package. If any of these things are lacking in your life then you have to work on them. You will start feeling better about yourself on the inside and that will show on the outside. You will get noticed and your problem will be solved.

And you have to stop asking this question. Why? Because asking this question makes you look weak. And no one likes weak people. You have to be strong! Say to yourself I will find someone! Not oh woes is me, I'm never going to find that person, I'm a loser... Well with that attitude it's no wonder. Be strong boy! Suck it up!

(Now you ask yourself, Skyryder, if you know all this stuff then why are you single? Well that's easy, I'm vain. I'm looking for someone exactly like myself. And I have yet to find that one person who reminds me of me. )

By the Force
Skyryder

 

Dear Skyryder,

Thank you for your input. I will do my best to apply myself in the future. I will try and remember what you've said.

Sincerely,
Lost in Wonderland

 

Dear Skyryder,

I don't have a question, I just want to say that your last response was so incredibly well thought out and insightful. I am so impressed! Who needs Dear Abby (she's dead any way) when we have Dear Skyryder.

A loyal fan

 

Kudos, SR! Excellent answer.

SJ, you're a wonderful guy, but you're beginning to sound like I would expect Darth Vader to sound if someone asked him why he was so evil. "It's Padme's fault for not believing in me. It's the Jedi Council's fault for not appreciating me. It's Obi-Wan's fault for trying to hold me back. It's Mace Windu's fault for trying to kill Palpatine instead of arresting him. It's Palpatine's fault for lying to and corrupting me." Stop blaming all those women, even though it probably is partially their fault for being biches, and examine your own 'game' and inner attitude.

I'm single because I was too crazy to end up with the right guy but too sane to end up with the wrong one.

 

Just a reminder -- the "b" word is not allowed on the boards if used to refer to people, even if misspelled or partially starred out. Thanks! [/responsible CR person]

 

Sorry, I meant to misspell it even more, with the "o" because I thought that was OK.(I wanted to add an embarrassed face here, but couldn't find one.)

 

VK, I'm trying not to blame women at all. I'm just very distraught at the girls who have some interest in me, do one thing and then do another. She even knew the name of my favorite video game character! That's how cool this girl is. So it's hard for me to be rational when I feel this way. Like I've said. I'm doing the best I can. My friends are showing some support, but I can't make her like me anymore than she does now.

 

You can't say 'bubba' here anymore?

What did he do?

 

See, this junk is why I have a cardinal rule in dealing with women: "They're not interested in me"
Its a mantra that has served me well.

 

Funniest thing I've read here in a dog's age...thanks! You Bubba you!

 

Yesterday Greg Barret was on Star 98.7. It was a great interview. He wrote the book "He's just not that into you". Everything he said was dead on true. So if you're a woman who wants to understand if the guy you're with likes you you should read this book. And I think it's probably true for the opposite sex as well.

Greg was a consultant on Sex and the City and also had a talk show that filmed on the Culver Studios, it wasn't renewed though because he didn't want to do a talk show anymore but he's funny and I like what he had to say about relationships.

 

He also has a stand up comedy DVD called "Greg Barret is Uncool". It is hilarious.

 

Dear Skyryder,

I feel alot better now. I just needed to get my mind off that girl and I feel better. Plus I realized that there's more than her in the world. There's other cuties I can meet who like Nintendo, anime, Voltron, 80's cartoons, SW and everything else. Also, I've been taking in B vitamins because I've heard it helps calm you down naturally. So I'm waitng for C-IV and Comic Con so that I can meet another geek like me.

Thanks a bunch,
Lost in Wonderland

 

Wait a second!

All this time I thought you were gay?

My bad.

 

JT, Do you have SR and SJ mixed up?
JR, Ha Ha, I'm not the only one who quotes the last message.

 

JT is projecting his own feelings about being gay.

Just kidding! I kill me.

Oh and I admit to quoting the last post.

 

I'm so ashamed!

 

I'm sorry to have outed you on the message board. Please forgive me.

**Disclaimer** Everything in the above few posts concerning JT's preference has been sarcasm.