Beyond - Legends Death and the Maiden (JC Title Challenge)

Title: Death and the Maiden
Author: Kissa
Characters: I?ll let you guess
Timeframe: Post DN
Summary: A mother reflects on the death of her daughter
Genre: Angst
Notes: Written for the JC Title Challenge

In the darkness,
My pain fades.
I see nothing.
I feel nothing.
This is Death.

I will not,
Cannot,
Return.
My heart no longer feels.
I do not suffer darkness.
I do not suffer.

I see nothing.
I feel nothing.
This is Death.

I read her last words to me, feeling a chill descend upon me once again. I?ve read these words too many times within the last few hours. The final scribble of a broken heart, the soul-wrenching good-bye after too much pain and loss.

Slowly, I stand, crumpling the piece of flimsy in my hands. This was not the way that it was supposed to be.

As her mother, I should have been able to help her. She is ? was ? my only girl. She was both the daughter I had always longed for and at the same time, nothing like the delicate maiden I had wanted to raise.

I had always wanted a girl to dress up. Someone who was elegant, and politically savvy. My daughter had been neither. She had been more like her father, a brawler: someone who was witty, but not savvy. Someone who was blunt, not coy. Someone who preferred the freedom of a flight suit to the glamorous folds of silk and lace that I had always worn.

When she had been really little, I had tried to play ?dress-up? with her. I still remember fondly the single time that I had actually been successful. It had been shortly after she had convinced our protocol droid to cut her hair as short as her father?s . . . and it had turned out not to be her in the silk dress, but rather her twin brother.

And not to get distracted or anything, but sometimes I wonder if that incident had anything to do with how he turned out . . .

But back to my daughter. Back to the girl I had wanted to by a maiden. Back to the girl who was supposed to be pure and loving. Back to the girl who had written her final words on a piece of flimsy before being sentenced to death for a crime that she hadn?t committed. Before she had sentenced herself to death, and carried out the execution alone . . .

My heart thudded painfully again ? or had it ever stopped? I wonder how I will break the news to my husband. How will he take the loss of his baby girl? She had always been his favorite ? the child that was most like him.

I can recall another incident with untainted clarity ? one that accents the relationship she shared with him perfectly. She had been riding with her father, coming back from a short trip to Yavin 4. They?d broken down and I had gone to pick them up.

When I arrived, my husband had been sticking out of a compartment on the floor, and his co-pilot and best friend had been handing him tools. I had looked and looked for my precious daughter, only to find her, hours later, fast asleep in an open engine compartment ? her small body covered in grease and a content expression on her face.

Then later, she had stopped being my girl completely. She had become death. Not abruptly, but gradually. I still remember the first time that I heard the Prophecy. My brother had called her ?Sword of the Jedi?. And she had carried her destiny to its fullest.

She had never known peace. She had destroyed her enemies and abandoned her friends and family. And then, in the end she had been alone, comforted only by the shadows of her past . . . and finally, even those had gone.

Tears slip from my eyes. That shouldn?t have happened that way. I should have known she was dying. I should have known that the burden of being ?Sword? was tearing her up. I read the words once more:

In the darkness,
My pain fades.
I see nothing.
I feel nothing.
This is Death.

There isn?t a body accompanying the message, and her twin claims that she still lives. But in my heart, I know that is n

 

i don't know where to begin...

....just know it's a great and wonderful thing, an I'll try to get in here to give yo ua better review later...

 

Wow, that was a very believable use of that title and a powerful vignette.

 

*chokes*

Powerful stuff, Kissa.

 

*sniffle sniffle* THat was really touching. The part about Jacen pretending to be Jaina was funny but the rest of it is just pure sad. I like the way you address Jaina's being teh Sword of teh Jedi and the way you made Leia see the darkness from teh outside. So why did Jaina kill herself? Anyhow, this is very artfully executed.

I should have known she was dying.

Nothng more touching than a mother's thoughts.

Your characterization is awesome and at first, I thought that TK was talking about Allana.

 

Kidan

i don't know where to begin...

....just know it's a great and wonderful thing, an I'll try to get in here to give yo ua better review later...


This review is great. It lets me know all the important things. 1. Kidan is reading. 2. I got him speechless.


Darth Ishtar

Wow, that was a very believable use of that title and a powerful vignette.

Thanks.


Spike2002

*chokes*

Powerful stuff, Kissa.

Thanks Spike


SilSolo

*sniffle sniffle* THat was really touching. The part about Jacen pretending to be Jaina was funny but the rest of it is just pure sad. I like the way you address Jaina's being teh Sword of teh Jedi and the way you made Leia see the darkness from teh outside. So why did Jaina kill herself? Anyhow, this is very artfully executed.

Well, she really didn?t really kill herself. I wrote a vig a while back called ?How few remain? and this is a prequel to that.

Glad you liked the Jacen pretending to be Jaina part.

Nothng more touching than a mother's thoughts.

Thanks.

Your characterization is awesome and at first, I thought that TK was talking about Allana.

I hope things never get this bad for Allana.

 

Okay I promised more coherent thoughts on this thing....so here we go...

I read her last words to me, feeling a chill descend upon me once again. I?ve read these words too many times within the last few hours. The final scribble of a broken heart, the soul-wrenching good-bye after too much pain and loss.
I found it interesting that her note was a poem. Jaina doesn't seem like the poetry kind of girl, so it added a randomness, and incoherency to her character, as if she's broken by her emotions...

Slowly, I stand, crumpling the piece of flimsy in my hands. This was not the way that it was supposed to be.
ahh..poor Leia, unfortunately Life is never the way its supposed to be...

I had always wanted a girl to dress up. Someone who was elegant, and politically savvy. My daughter had been neither. She had been more like her father, a brawler: someone who was witty, but not savvy. Someone who was blunt, not coy. Someone who preferred the freedom of a flight suit to the glamorous folds of silk and lace that I had always worn.
and that's what happens when you marry Han Solo...

When she had been really little, I had tried to play ?dress-up? with her. I still remember fondly the single time that I had actually been successful. It had been shortly after she had convinced our protocol droid to cut her hair as short as her father?s . . . and it had turned out not to be her in the silk dress, but rather her twin brother.

And not to get distracted or anything, but sometimes I wonder if that incident had anything to do with how he turned out . . .
Now THIS section was priceless....

But back to my daughter. Back to the girl I had wanted to by a maiden. Back to the girl who was supposed to be pure and loving. Back to the girl who had written her final words on a piece of flimsy before being sentenced to death for a crime that she hadn?t committed. Before she had sentenced herself to death, and carried out the execution alone . . .
you really have Jaina down here..she is once more doing things for herself, without due consideration of others, and how what she does will affect them....

My heart thudded painfully again ? or had it ever stopped? I wonder how I will break the news to my husband. How will he take the loss of his baby girl? She had always been his favorite ? the child that was most like him.
He will be devastated...of course he did get more upset at losing the family dog than he did Anakin....**evil grumbles directed at DelRay**

I can recall another incident with untainted clarity ? one that accents the relationship she shared with him perfectly. She had been riding with her father, coming back from a short trip to Yavin 4. They?d broken down and I had gone to pick them up.

When I arrived, my husband had been sticking out of a compartment on the floor, and his co-pilot and best friend had been handing him tools. I had looked and looked for my precious daughter, only to find her, hours later, fast asleep in an open engine compartment ? her small body covered in grease and a content expression on her face.
This was also another funny, and it caught the pre-NJO Jaina down perfectly as well...

Then later, she had stopped being my girl completely. She had become death. Not abruptly, but gradually. I still remember the first time that I heard the Prophecy. My brother had called her ?Sword of the Jedi?. And she had carried her destiny to its fullest.
the prophecy, jsut DelRay's way of saying, we're never going to be nice and kind to this character, and there's nothign you fans can do about it...

There isn?t a body accompanying the message, and her twin claims that she still lives. But in my heart, I know that is not true. Even if her heart beats, she is dead. Her eyes are starring l

 

This is amazing! I'll have to go read it again to savor every bit.

"I wanted her to grow up to be a maiden, and instead she grew up to be death."

Absolutely breath taking! Bravo!

 

Sooo sad. It does seem that way, she's dying and no one is noticing because she still breathes. Poor Jaina.