Before - Legends Descent Into The Dark (EU, Yoda 300 years before TPM)--*Complete* Replies 7/31- Link to EotD posted!

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction- Before, Saga, and Beyond' started by Souderwan, Jul 15, 2005.

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  1. geo3 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 29, 2002
    star 4
    These epilogues of yours have been coming thick and fast ? far faster than I have been able to assemble my thoughts ? but I?ve seen an advantage to that: you appear to be building up to a crescendo of great beauty. Each vignette is more superb than the one before it. I?m almost tempted to wait until the very end to review them as a kind of story by themselves?

    Nah! :p I have one or two things to say right now.

    Allies and Obstacles

    ?When nearly eight hundred years old you reach, long ago shriveled up will your sweat glands be, too!?

    [face_laugh] All the way through this series of vignettes Yoda?s personality shines through in a way that is utterly familiar from the films, but which quite honestly, is rarely expressed well in fan fiction. This is beyond characterization ? taken as a whole, it brings the reader to a real point of intimacy with this iconic character.

    The banter between Mace and Yoda ? the closeness between themm - is something I also believed I saw in the films, but it took your fic to really highlight that relationship, as in this marvelous piece of characterization (of both characters!) that one simply couldn?t find anywhere else:

    But Mace?s ability to see shatterpoints had a way of making those around him uncomfortable. Just about every Padawan and more than a few Jedi Knights had reported feeling that every time Master Windu glanced at them, he was secretly scrutinizing their faults. Perhaps it was the fact that Yoda never seemed concerned about Mace?s gift that Mace seemed to seek him out more than any other Jedi. Admitting to searching for Yoda?s shatterpoint, especially in a quest to win a friendly sparring match, was likely twisting Mace?s insides with apprehension.

    ?Deep beneath the layers and layers of light, I saw?a?blemish. It was barely there. A dark spot?no?a?void. I don?t know what it was, but I know that it was your shatterpoint??

    ?? deep in all of us, some darkness always lives. Possible, it is, that this is what you saw.? Yoda picked up his gimer stick and poked Mace gently in the ribs, smiling. ?Or floated in your eye, a speck of dust did! Know for sure, I do not!?

    Ah? I wondered what Yoda would say if asked point-blank about the experiences he swore never to reveal! He could have lied ? but he didn?t. I love that. This is exactly the answer I imagined he might give.

    And then there is Dooku ? just before his Sithly plunge, I gather:

    Dooku raised both of his eyebrows. He stared at Yoda for a long time, silent.

    ?I don?t suppose you would allow for the possibility that your friendship with Master Windu might be blinding you to the danger he poses to himself, would you??

    Yoda paused to consider it. ?Meditate on it, I will.?

    Dooku opened his mouth, as if to respond, then seemed to think better of it and nodded instead.

    ?That is all anyone can ask, Master,? he said. He stood and left Yoda?s chambers without another word.

    The relationship between Yoda and Dooku is very different than that between Yoda and Mace, and you do such a good job, in so few brush strokes, of making it clear that Dooku knows this ? and tests and probes and probably is jealous of that relationship. Cleverer still is the way you play with the characteristic we saw so clearly in AOTC ? that Dooku lies by telling at least partial truths. We know from Fall of the Sith that Mace does indeed have this dangerous dark edge. But you also show ? at least I get the impression here - that Dooku is keepinghis own cousel, and is probably already on his way out the door of the Jedi Temple for the last time?


    It is remarkable the way you have inserted truths from DitD into these very familiar and accurately rendered scenes from the films ? only now, these familiar scenes fit into the larger picture that you have created the way a hand fits into a glove. Marvelous!

    ?Master Qui-Gon would tell me that they?re just dreams,? Obi-Wan continued, ?that they pass in time. I just can?t help thinking that I?m
  2. GrandAdmiralV Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2005
    star 3
    Wow...lo and behold, everything was actually functioning in my office this morning. It's a miracle! So I can finally R&R.

    You know, I think you actually wrote the one thing that made me a little more sympathetic to the whole Anakin/Padme dysfunction.

    Realization dawned?.Skywalker needed attachments.

    When his mother died, Padmé Amidala had filled the void.

    She was Skywalker?s anchor.

    She was his Migruna.

    Nothing must ever happen to disrupt that connection.

    This helps it make more sense -- but it also points out how misguided the Jedi Order was in training Anakin in the first place. Their whole code forbids personal attachments, but Anakin can't function without them. I don't need to point out that this is a Big Problem.

    Again, it was wonderful to read Yoda's p.o.v. on all this events. It gives them such a deeper emotional resonance.

    I can't wait to see what you do with the final vignette! =D=
  3. SHADOW_MASTER_W Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Jan 11, 2005
    star 1
    Beautiful imagery and story telling. Yoda is by far my favorite character for fan fiction. Only followed closely by a certain well known Grand Admiral that no Star Wars author, amateur or pro, can seem to keep out of their work.

    Well written indeed!!

    But answer me this, why did Yoda respond to Anakin in ROTS the way he did when asked about the fear of loss? Why didn't he personalize his advice rather than being aloof and general in his statements?
  4. Souderwan Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2005
    star 6
    Author?s note: This is it, everyone. My last pre-post reply (unless I get some bonus replies [face_praying]) for DitD. I?ll post a more detailed A/N right before the story in the next post but I?ll take this moment to extend a heartfelt thanks to all of you for your continued support throughout this story. It looks like I lost a few of you along the way to DRL or boredom, but I thank you all nonetheless. This story has been even more rewarding than FotS! While there are a lot of reasons for that, the number one reason is the amazing responses you?ve all shared with me. There is nothing more wonderful for a writer than to know his work is appreciated.

    Now?on to replies! :D

    Arcalian: Congrats on first post! :D

    AOTC stuffs from Yoda's POV. Explains stuff in FOTS as well.

    *grin* Well, I certainly hope so! ;)

    Ah yes Souder, so many writing projects coming your way, no? *grins and rubs hands*


    Lord_Zeron: Souderwan, I think you just reached a new high.

    [face_blush] Thanks. I try.

    I always like to save your stories for the end of the day, something to look forward to, and I have to say that once more I am not disappointed.

    I?m so happy to hear that I can?t even begin to tell you! Thank you!!

    As I read Descent into the Dark, I realized that Migruna was to Yoda as Padme/Shmi were to Anakin (reminds me of a standarized test question),

    LOL! Thanks!

    though the way you wrote that made it seem much more... impactful? I'm not sure quite how to describe it, it was like a flood of emotion and awe.

    That?s amazing to hear. I think that Yoda?s relationship with Anakin had a flood of potential. I?d say more but I don?t want to ruin the next post. We?ll pick that thought up after I?ve posted it.

    I don't care if DitD would've been the worst Fanfic I ever read (which it wasn't; quite the opposite in fact), just getting to these epilogues would be worth it.

    Thank you again. I?m happy to hear that the vignettes are worth it because, in large part, these vignettes were the most known part of the story in my mind when it was born in my head nearly a year ago. Finally getting to them (and completing them) has been an amazing journey for me and I?m happy to have had you along for the ride!

    Your grateful author,


    Darth_Vastor: Great to have you back, my friend! I missed you!

    This is a great insight into why the Jedi are inevitably defeated. I like how you portray Yoda as being surrrounded by the light, yet the experience through which he suffered is still with him. Barely perceptible, but still there.

    I?m glad you think so. I realized as I was watching and reading the PT that many of the Jedi seemed absolutely tied to the Order. There were, of course, a few exceptions?namely Qui-Gon, Yoda, Obi-Wan, Mace and, of course, Anakin. It occurred to me that it was no accident that so much of the future of the Jedi rested on these particular Jedi. If you read the PT novels and the Dark Horse comics, you see this connection even more palpably in the ?minor? characters. The Jedi Order is their home and most of them wouldn?t know what to do without it. James Lucenco in The Dark Lord really portrayed this well, I think.

    It makes a great deal of sense that Yoda's shatterpoint would not be connected to the Jedi Order, when he has learned that other ties are more important.

    Yes?Yoda has learned, for better or for worse, that attachments of any kind represent a clear and present danger to any Jedi. Whether or not his method of dealing with that knowledge?avoiding them at all costs rather than learning to deal with them?is the right approach is certainly up for debate.

    It's been mention several times before, but I greatly enjoyed the vibe of Dooku as the reepectful, dutiful older brother, and Mace as the more open, free-spirited brother who is loved all the more for his uncoventionality. It offers us a chance to follow part of the path that drove Dooku to the Sith.
  5. Art_Of_War Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Dec 9, 2005
    star 2
    Allies and Obstacles?

    Excellent vignette, Souderwan.=D=

    The way in which you use the age old technique of comparing and contrasting is really used to the utmost as you present to us these two different, but linked scenes.

    First, you hand us the wonderfully played out scene between Yoda and Windu, their tired forms following a long fought battle foreshadowing their inevitable confrontation in FotS. And then you gave Windu the smile, a startling similarity to the Anakin Skywalker who we come to know later on in the story and a sad contrast to Mace we hear from a while later. In that we learn "He would have laughed, too, if somewhere in the ring on Geonosis he hadn't lost the knack."

    It almost begs the question if the Mace we hear in this little vignette would have fallen in FotS.


    Then we are presented with the Yoda with the shadow of past days stained on his heart. And like those that would proceed him, Yoda kept the secret to himself, entrusting no being with the burden that he carries.

    And finally Dooku returns to sight, the way in which he attempts to influence Yoda's teaching of Windu predicating the manner in which he will fight the Jedi in the coming war.

    Brilliant Souderwan. Absolutely brilliant.

  6. Souderwan Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2005
    star 6
    Yay! Extra replies!

    Art_Of_War: First, you hand us the wonderfully played out scene between Yoda and Windu, their tired forms following a long fought battle foreshadowing their inevitable confrontation in FotS. And then you gave Windu the smile, a startling similarity to the Anakin Skywalker who we come to know later on in the story and a sad contrast to Mace we hear from a while later. In that we learn "He would have laughed, too, if somewhere in the ring on Geonosis he hadn't lost the knack."

    I'm so glad you brought this up. The Mace Windu we see in the movies is very severe, as are most of the Jedi on the Council. I like the idea of connecting Mace's downtrodden nature with the shroud of the dark side.

    It almost begs the question if the Mace we hear in this little vignette would have fallen in FotS.

    Probably not, I'd say. At that moment in time, I think he was far enough away from the dark that he might have been harder to get hold of. But...war changes a man and the influence of the dark side over two decades can do that as well... :(

    I'm so happy you enjoyed!! :D

    Final post coming up shortly!

  7. Souderwan Jedi Grand Master

    Member Since:
    Jun 3, 2005
    star 6
    Author?s Note: Please forgive me this final opportunity to share my thoughts on this story with you.

    This final vignette contains the scene that inspired the entire Face of the Dark Side trilogy that began with [link=]Fall of the Sith[/link] just over a year ago and will end (when I get to it) with Edge of the Darkness.

    The story of Yoda?s descent into the dark first emerged almost fully formed in my mind while reading this scene from Anakin?s point of view in Stover?s Revenge of the Sith novelization. Fall of the Sith was born from that single moment. I chose to write Fall of the Sith first in large part in response to a debate I was having with someone about the nature of the dark side and the Sith in particular. But Yoda?s story always gnawed at me and I?m happy to have been able to share it with all of you and to have had you on this journey.

    What follows below is my take on what I consider to be the first of two pivotal scenes in Revenge of the Sith (with a few artistic liberties ;) ). The title of this post refers to the second scene, which is the starting point of Fall of the Sith. In reverence to Matthew Stover and his magical way with words, I?ve elected to use much of the same dialogue he used in the novelization. The original scene can be found on pages 182-183 of the hardcover edition of the Revenge of the Sith novelization.

    I would also like to thank geo3 for allowing me to adopt her conceptualization of The One Point for use in this story and for being a sounding board in putting the finishing touches on these vignettes. [:D]

    As always, my heartfelt thanks to my very special beta GrandAdmiralV who has helped me sharpen my figurative quill and, without whom, this story would have been a pale shadow of what you have experienced. Thank you!! [:D]

    Finally, I thank you, my very special readers. You have buoyed me during some dark times of my own and your wonderful feedback has made this journey one of the most enjoyable experiences I have had. The most enjoyable aspect of sharing our stories online is the interplay between the reader and the writer and I don?t think a writer could possibly hope for better readers than you. Thank you!

    @};- @};-[:D][:D] @};- @};-

    And now?the final installment of Descent Into The Dark.


    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~The One Point~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    The waning sunlight provided by Coruscant?s orbital mirrors glowing softly against the slits of the window shades did little to light the room. As Yoda stared about his spare quarters, he contemplated how closely the fading artificial light mirrored the slow diminishment of the Jedi Order in a galaxy increasingly overcome by the darkness of war.

    But the war was merely the vehicle, he knew. The war was nothing more than a tool by the dark side to weaken the Jedi into a mere shadow of their former glory. Even now as he sat as comfortably as was possible in his stark home, relatively safe on the planet on which the foundations of the Republic had been born, a thousand Jedi led a million clone warriors in fierce battles across thousands of worlds.

    Jedi warriors.

    A mere two decades ago, the two words would never have appeared together so casually. But now the HoloNet was filled with stories of the heroic exploits of the Jedi warriors that fought so gallantly to protect the galaxy from the scourge of the CIS. And no other Jedi warrior was better known than Anakin Skywalker, the Hero With No Fear. Tales of his feats were rapidly becoming the stuff of legend. He and Obi-Wan represented the new face of the Jedi Order.

    The galaxy had truly changed.

    Yoda sighed. He stared into the increasing darkness of his room, contemplating the past two decades with growing sadness. For some, the transformation of the galaxy had seemed gradual. For some, the alteration had been subtle. For some, there had been no revolution.

    Not fo/>
  8. Darth_ShadowHawk Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Nov 25, 2005
    That Yoda sure is one darn insightful um person from Migruna.
    I like how you put the connection between Yoda and Anakin, because during the movies
    we always see Yoda's powerful side. Never his vulnerable side. I really like that.
    thnx for the story Souderwan!!!!
    Darth Shadowhawk
  9. Jedi_Hsoj Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Apr 27, 2004
    You are one of the most gifted writers I have read on this forum. Kudos to you for your great story telling and graphic detail that makes the characters as real as they are in the movies. Thank you. PM me when you begin the new chapter in your other story.
  10. Talon_Kenobi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 3, 2003
    star 4
    I applaud you, that was great. Yoda really tried and I guess he did succeed, although it involved a lot of sacrifice.
  11. excellion_razor Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Feb 13, 2006
    star 1
    excellent ending to a wonderful fic. Kuddos to you!
  12. TelannaTani Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jun 28, 2005
    star 3
    You finished it?!


    But...I'm just starting! More comments, will I have, when completed this story, have I.

  13. Arcalian Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Mar 13, 2005
    star 3
    * A full standing ovation for this, no mere smiley face with clapping hands. I stand. I clap my hands together fully cupped, so they provide a much more authoritative sound than the usual flat smack of hands coming together. An echoing report of a clap. No less is worthy.*

    I wonder if Yoda ever suspected Palpatine...

    I wonder if Yoda should have said that he knew about Padme....

    I wonder how many times Yoda agonized over those questions on Dagobah, or, sideways in time, if he wondered what he missed with Mace...

    But other tasks call to be answered now, of an entirely different shatterpoint, do they not.....heheheh.....
  14. dianethx Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 1, 2002
    star 6
    Although I didn't read the main story (you know how much I dislike Yoda:p ), I thought this epilogue was quite brilliant. Your use of the canon film dialogue interspersed with your own scenes and the knowledge of your other story which comes directly after this, was just wonderfully done. Loved the flow of it as well, the musings of Yoda and how much he wanted to tell Skywalker but waited just a moment too late. Lost him and all with it.

    I loved this especially
    It was not Anakin?s brashness that was his greatest flaw, Yoda mused. So many of his fellow Jedi Masters believed that Skywalker was too bold, too sure of himself, and too convinced that anything was possible to ever truly grasp all the subtleties of the Force. While these traits were indeed present in the young man, they were hardly surprising and certainly not without merit. For Anakin Skywalker, all things were possible. His power in the Force was undeniably formidable and virtually unstoppable. No?Anakin had every right to be as confident as he was.

    Still other Jedi Masters believed that it was Anakin?s incessant connection to unacknowledged attachments that could spell his eventual doom and take the Jedi Order into the murky depths of destruction with him. Mace Windu, in particular, held this point of view, though he mistakenly attributed this attachment to Skywalker?s friendship with Palpatine. Again, that insight was not without merit.

    Yoda sensed that Skywalker?s greatest weakness was his inability to completely surrender his will to the Force. It was a flaw that Yoda once carried in his core as well. For Skywalker, the Force was a tool, not a guide. It was a mechanism by which he made the impossible seem mundane. It was the pathway to the salvation of those who depended on him?but never the pathway to saving himself.

    Anakin Skywalker never considered the possibility that he, himself, might need saving

    Very well done. Bravo, Souderwan. =D=
  15. GrandAdmiralV Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    May 30, 2005
    star 3
    Sorry I couldn't get to this before now...yesterday I did about a week's worth of work in one day. Sigh.

    Again, you've managed to make Anakin a much more sympathetic character. Although I enjoyed Stover's novelization very much, I still wanted to smack Anakin upside the head (Padme, too, come to think of it). But here I can see much more clearly how his flaws contributed to his downfall, and I've come to a better understanding of why he did what he did. Too bad Lucas didn't have you around to help write the script so that Anakin didn't come off as such a...well, you get the picture.

    Anakin Skywalker never considered the possibility that he, himself, might need saving.

    This is a wonderful line, because it elegantly and succinctly sums up Anakin's core issue in one sentence. His sense of invincibility blinded him to the one shortcoming that turned out to be his fatal flaw.

    I also wonder if Yoda spent his time on Dagobah musing on might-have-beens. Then again, I can also picture him saying, "Change the past, we cannot. Concentrate on the present, we must."

    Oh, no,'ve got me writing Yoda-speak! :eek:

    Wonderful end to a truly remarkable story. I hope that inspiration strikes soon and you continue with this trilogy. I know that I and many of your loyal readers are looking forward to it! =D=
  16. Lord_Zeron Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Mar 19, 2005
    star 2
    (Warning: As usual, I'm a bit tired after writing this reply -going to school at the break of dawn can do that to a guy, as I'm sure you remember- and I'm afraid that editing it in my current state will only mess up my initial reaction. So there might be a few typos, but there shouldn't be anything too deadly.)

    I... don't know what to say...
    Give me a minute; I'll think of something.

    Okay, where do I begin? I guess the beginning would work best, so just to mix things up I'll start with the end. That last chapter was AMAZING! There are a few very very good works that pull me into a story so much that, for a few moments, I actually feel like I leave this world and am sent to another. Where my concentration is grabbed from the start and held onto so tightly I can't even think of getting away. Most of the time, this happens when I read the really good parts of published works.

    That entire vignette was a good part.

    For that matter, a good portion of the story and most of the other epilogues were that good as well, but none of them compete with this. For those few minutes, I was Yoda. I felt what he felt, knew what he knew, and thought what he thought. The writing was smooth and flowed pefectly without a single stumble that would break the spell. It was interesting, yet simple, poetic, yet descriptive. It was nothing short of breathtakingly magnificent.

    I think the reason I enjoy Star Wars books, stories, movies, etc. so much is because I can imagine myself in them; I can ponder what it would feel like to command a start fleet, fight as a Jedi General, or take over the galaxy. I can imagine what it would feel like to be the greatest Dark Lord of all times, or the most powerful Jedi to ever live. With your story, I did not need to imagine. I was there.

    I couldn't possibly comment on everything I enjoyed about that last post because I don't think I know any more than you do! When I... experienced that, I didn't feel like a reader and thus I lost all communications with my own self, if that makes any sense. Usually, I'll say to myself: remember that part there or comment on line; line part was good. There's no way I could choose a favorite part from that, it was all perfect. That was truly the One Point of your story, the highlight of everything this far. If it's even possible, your writing skills seem to be improving as time goes by and I thank God that I'm among the first to feel the stories you craft. I'm sure I won't be the last.

    If ever George Lucas decides to make another movie and needs someone to write the novelization, I would recommend you without hesitation. Of course, George Lucas would never listen to me, but he has to listen when the Force itself (and I believe there are few things in this world closer to the Force than imagination and writing)tells him to hire you. You started out so long ago as someone who had mastered Mathew Stover's incredibly difficult style in an extremely short amount of time. But you took that style, and molded it and shaped it, and like one two branches stepping from the trunk of some tree of power I can only dream of seeing, have made a way of writing that is impossible not to enjoy. I don't know what Stover himself is doing now, but if he doesn't improve his own writing soon, he may have some serious competition in the near future.

    Before this post gets longer than DitD, I'm going to try to wrap things up. Marvelous story (or stories, from a certain point-of-view) and an excellent decision on all the scenes you redid, implimenting your own thoughts and ideas into what appeared to be an already perfect work. For as long as the Star Wars universe exists, I hope that you never stop adding your pieces of the puzzle to it. Without Star Wars, Souderwan would not be here telling us these fantastic tales. But what's more important: without Souderwan, Star Wars itself just wouldn't be the same.

    Thank you again for everything, I am honored and proud to have accompanied you through the creation of these two wonderful novels. I have a f
  17. _JM_ Jedi Padawan

    Member Since:
    Jun 26, 2001
    star 4
    Phantoms Like Yoda showing Qui-Gon respect, and his insight that Obi-Wan is troubled. A very powerful sensing of Obi-Wan?s dreams for Yoda. I do wonder if Obi-Wan passed on what Yoda said about self-fulfilling prophecies to Anakin as well as what Qui-Gon would say about dreams passing in time.

    Poor Yoda with his shock that they were going to Tatooine.

    Poor Yoda again having to walk a delicate path between being unhelpful by not sharing knowledge and breaching his promise to not share knowledge.

    Liked Yoda?s personal insight into the fear of loss, born of his loss of Migurua, and how this could lead to terrible deeds.

    Good arguing about Anakin. Liked Ki Adi Mundi being the peacemaker. Agree with Even Piell about how dangerous Anakin would be without training. Anakin knows he has Jedi potential now, he has had this confirmed beyond doubt and knows that he has been denied one of his dreams. Anakin would practice and practice, be more determined to win his freedom somehow and then get enough credits for the black (or grey) market documents on the Jedi he?d need.

    Or?the new Supreme Chancellor would have personally visited Tatooine to demonstrate that the Republic was no longer going to tolerate lawlessness and as a PR gesture have freed Anakin and Shimi. Over the following years as they settled in on Coruscant it would only seem fair that Palpatine stayed in contact with them. :)

    Good for Qui-Gon managing to surprise Yoda. Liked Yoda?s grumpiness and saying he just needs to wait and outlive everyone else.

    The Face of the Dark Side Liked Liam with his ?I?m not listening, I?m not listening, I?m using the Force? though I think it is possible that Liam could instinctively use the Force to enhance his hearing (or think he is hearing the remote when he was actually ?hearing? it in the Force). Loved Qui-Gon having been looking for ways to circumvent the rules even at an early age.

    Felt a little sorry for Yoda as the deletion of Kamino brought back memories of his own deletion of Migruna. Does raise the question of why the Jedi are the only people with a map though, if I was Obi-Wan I?d have gone to the nearest public library (or logged onto gww.GalacticAtlas.cor).

    Liked how much of a struggle meditation was becoming for even Yoda, underlines what the shroud of the darkside truly means to a Jedi?s ability to gain insight. A real mental merging when Anakin?s rage ignited his connection to the Force and his rage and pain resonated with Yoda?s memories. Agree that any Jedi without Yoda?s experience would have trouble understanding Anakin?s pain.

    I wonder how Yoda would have judged Anakin as Vader, if he?d have considered Anakin as much ?no more?

    Liked Yoda?s insight into how the arrival of Padmé affected Anakin.

    The One Point Liked Yoda?s reflection on how strange it would have been before to refer to ?Jedi Warriors? and liked how Yoda?s perspective with his centuries of life differs from others who are so much younger. Good insight by Yoda to realise the manipulations and to realise that he is no longer the prize, Anakin is.

    Agree so much with Yoda about Anakin. Anakin?s ?arrogance? is due to the fact he simply is that good. Anakin?s attachments give him something to fight for and use his skills to preserve and serve. But Anakin?s incredible strength of will which allows him to focus his power, to be relentless in his determination to excel at everything he does, also prevents him from being ?distracted? by the will of the Force.

    Poor Yoda wanting Anakin to trust him enough to be honest, and trying to find some way to advise Anakin without revealing that Anakin?s secret is no secret. In a way Yoda was a victim of his own history, Yoda has achieved the level of calm and discipline that few other Jedi can even approach. A different Jedi might have lost his temper a little at Anakin?s disrespectful disdain and told Anakin to ?Sit the Kriff down and shut the Kriff up.?

    Probably wouldn?t have worked but Anakin did need a good slapping. :)

    And a different Jedi might not
  18. Art_Of_War Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Dec 9, 2005
    star 2

    Yet another excellent vignette Souderwan. =D=

    The way in which you can turn these scenes we know so well on their heads is simply fantastic. And once again, we are confronted with that compare and contrasting of yours. Where as in the movies we saw an old stoddard council unwilling to beleive in our protaginosts, we are now confronted with a council, with Yoda at its head, who are now faced with the terrible truth, that the Sith are once again on the path to domination.

    Even more interesting though is how Yoda is the sole being within those walls to truly understand the fear that has begun to wrap itself around Anakin's heart. Which brings to mind the idea that through Yoda's years of preparation for the coming storm, the Jedi Order has not faced the dark side. They no not these emotions like fear and anger but merely the mantra that recoils from them. And if they do not understand the Dark Side, how can they fight it with any hope of victory?

    Another great addition Souderwan.=D=
  19. Baby_Death_Star Jedi Knight

    Member Since:
    Aug 12, 2004
    star 4
    Thanks, Souderwan, for all you've written in such a short period of time.

    Thanks for the thrilling ride, the fascinating looks deep into our beloved character's minds.

    And thank you so much for not intending to stop after two novels! :)



    final .pdf-update:
    [link=]"Descent into the Dark" by Souderwan[/link] pdf, completed fan novel, 228pg, 780kB

    1st & final doc-update:
    [link=]"Descent into the Dark" by Souderwan[/link] .doc, completed fan novel, 228pg, 477kB
  20. Cobranaconda Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Mar 3, 2004
    star 7
    Um, wow.



    Dude, get published. Soon. You're more than good enough for profic.

    As for these epilogues, they tie in with FotS brilliantly. As for the final part of the trilogy, I can't wait.

    You rule :p
  21. aldocassidy Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jun 22, 2005
    star 3
    A breathtaking conclusion to your story, Sounderwan! I should be getting to sleep now, so I'll leave a more proper review later, but suffice to say, every viggie was fascinating, especially the scene where Dooku expressed hints jealousy towards Yoda for allowing Mace to flirt with the Dark Side. The final vig was perfect as well, when Yoda sees the future and though he doesn't know the final outcome of his vision, he has resigned himself towards any action, fully trusting in the will Force and knowing that the ultimate Fate of the Galaxy lies in the hands of others.

    We can only hope that the Fall of the Sith follow, sequentially, the end of this epic in this AU.
  22. Art_Of_War Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Dec 9, 2005
    star 2
    The Face of the Dark Side

    You sow the imagery throughout this little vignette like a dedicated farmer back in the days of old, meticulously finding the ground that the would be crops so desperately need. From Yoda's smile as he teaches the younglings to the anguish he feels in his heart as Anakin tastes the Dark Side for the first time, every description and action is picture perfect, the epitome of show not tell.

    And then you again show us how truly similiar Anakin and Yoda really are, the possesions that they so loved becoming focal points at which the Dark Side beckons incessantly. The sole internal difference in that Yoda has already experienced the feeling of anger and despair while Anakin is still feeling the waters so to speak.

    I know you must get tired of reading this but....

    Fantastic vignette.=D=
  23. Talon_Kenobi Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 3, 2003
    star 4
    Let me know when edge of darkness starts too!
  24. geo3 Jedi Master

    Member Since:
    Sep 29, 2002
    star 4
    I confess. I?ve been circling around, not quite willing to land and to have to say a formal ?good-bye? to a story that I?ve grown so devoted to; not willing, and not quite knowing how. Final comment posts never seem adequate, you know? What can you really say to an author who has worked long and hard and faithfully to create something that is now alive inside of you? ?Thanks for the effort, buddy ? more?? ;)

    So I?ll just reply to this last vignette as though it were just another post, and not the last post?

    I?ll start by saying how enjoyable it is to place one?s own conceptualization (?the One Point?) in hands that are a capable as yours. I love seeing it come alive here. Thank you!

    Jedi warriors.

    A mere two decades ago, the two words would never have appeared together so causally.

    Yes. * punches air with fist * Yes! Exactly! The guardians of peace and justice were sullied, IMHO, by throwing them into a civil war against legions of non-sentient, non-force-related droids. Of course they had to defend the Republic, but the price ? it was a genius move on Palpatine?s part. *sniff * If you admire that kind of warped, unprincipled thinking, that is?

    As Yoda considered his lost Jedi comrades, one thing became abundantly clear to him?the Dark no longer wanted him.

    The Dark wanted Anakin Skywalker.

    And here we have it ? the point of transition between everything that you have shown us about the Sith/Jedi past as experienced by (and carried by)Yoda, and their future, which will be carried by one Anakin Skywalker. I can?t stop thinking about the scene in ?Fall of the Sith,? where Yoda passes on everything he knows to Anakin? :_|

    iYoda looked up from his reverie and felt the roiling thunderstorm that surrounded Skywalker crash against his shields. No doubt the young Jedi knight wanted advice that Yoda no longer knew how to give. Anakin Skywalker?s destiny was outside of Yoda?s reach.

    What a beautiful description of the beginning of what I found to be one of the most troubling scenes in ROTS. I kept asking, ?Why??? Why did Yoda not say more? All through AOTC and into ROTS he was shown watching Anakin ? studying him ? probably perceiving what others did not. Why, I asked myself over and over again, did he not say more in this scene?

    Yoda sensed that Skywalker?s greatest weakness was his inability to completely surrender his will to the Force. It was a flaw that Yoda once carried in his core as well. For Skywalker, the Force was a tool, not a guide. It was a mechanism by which he made the impossible seem mundane. It was the pathway to the salvation of those who depended on him?but never the pathway to saving himself.

    Anakin Skywalker never considered the possibility that he, himself, might need saving.

    Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.

    Closing his eyes, he breathed in deeply, calling on the Light. The dark shroud that clouded the Force pulled away quickly, as darkness always receded before the presence of the Light.

    This small observation is the culmination of everything you have been saying in your stories about the nature of the Dark ? that it resides within us. Look how effectively Yoda deals with this ?dark shroud? that troubles all the Jedi ? he can do so because of what he has learned so painfully.

    And then, Oh Joy! You gave me my answer?

    Yoda knew he could order Anakin to stay. He could make the boy sit down and listen. His hand reached up instinctively as if to do just that when Anakin glared down at him, his red-splotched eyes full of disdain. Yoda withdrew his hand as if stung.

    Skywalker was no longer willing to listen.

    Yes. He is right. He is absolutely right. Yoda knows so much but he cannot choose the destiny of the others. He has done his best to prepare them? now he can only wait, maintain his faith in the Force, and find solace in the knowledge that although obscured, the light can never be lost.


    *happy sigh * Now I am complete.

    I love this story. It needed to be wr
  25. TelannaTani Jedi Youngling

    Member Since:
    Jun 28, 2005
    star 3
    My dear Souderwan,
    Thank you for leading me through my first encounter in "Before the Saga" fan fiction. Because I just began and read through this story, it is impossible for me comment on every bit and piece that touch or gouged me during this tremendous journey. Even as I PMed you half way through the story, I could never have dreamed the extent to which you would ultimately go to connect this story with the movies, stories and plotlines we so know and love (or hate). Every detail, from the Sith'ari to the familial connection of Mace Windu and his relationship with Yoda - every detail was perfect.

    I have enjoyed this story immensely, my friend. You claim your stories are dark and deep - and perhaps they are. But in my opinion, it is the depth of the story - and the depth of the darkness from which Yoda emerged - that made the story so captivating. It was the depth, complexity and attention to a massive amount of details that kept me hanging on every word - from beginning to end.

    I look forward to diving into your other surely extensive works!

    =D==D==D= on your accomplishment!

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